Name of Science: Part One, The Messiah Strand
by AliasJaneDoe
Summary: Brennan becomes the first test subject in Eckhart's quest for immortality. Very dark. COMPLETE
1. Disclaimer, Warnings

FF.NET MONITORS: My understanding of the ff.net rules is that you can still post warnings/comments in a separate chapter at the beginning or end of the story, just not as individual chapters in the middle. If I'm wrong about this, please let me know. I'm trying to follow the rules here, and I don't want to be banned or have my story deleted. So if there are any problems, please tell me and I'll fix them immediately.  
  
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TITLE: "Name of Science: Part One, The Messiah Strand"  
  
AUTHOR: ghostwritten  
  
E-MAIL: AliasJaneDoe@hotmail.com  
  
RATING: strong PG-13 (might become R later)  
  
SUMMARY: Brennan becomes the first test subject in Eckhart's quest for immortality. Dark story, set in season 1.  
  
CATEGORY: drama, angst, H/C  
  
DISCLAIMER: I don't know who owns the show, but the point of this disclaimer is that it's not me. I'm not making any money off this, so please don't sue me.  
  
ARCHIVE: not without permission  
  
SPOILERS: Um, let's just say anything is fair game. I'm posting as I go, so I'm not sure what will come up. Probably nothing major.  
  
AUTHOR'S NOTES: I was going to write a Jesse story next, but I'm in a really bad place right now, and life sucks, and the horrible plot I came up with really works better with an elemental. And one of my friends suggested some major Brennan whumping as a form of stress relief, and that sounded like a good idea. So anyway, be warned, I'm not in a good mood, and this story is going to be dark. Besides, if Eckhart is such a bad guy, why doesn't he ever do anything truly bad?  
  
I didn't intend for this to be a ship story, but Bren and Emma keep doing that thing where they stare longingly at each other, so don't blame me if I'm not able to keep them apart. I was trying to switch over to be a Shal/Bren shipper, but they're determined not to let that happen. Oh well, I warned them that this story is going to be dark. It's not my fault if I break Emma's heart.  
  
FEEDBACK: please, even flames are welcome as long you give a reason for them  
  
WARNINGS: (scroll down to read, or skip if you're the type who doesn't like to be spoiled about a story, but please realize that there are warnings and you're skipping them at your own risk)  
  
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strong language, very dark, extreme torture, Brennan/Emma, tiny little one- sided slash vibe (nothing at all major as I'm not a slasher myself), suicidal thoughts, most likely character death 


	2. Ultimatums

PART ONE: THE MESSIAH STRAND  
  
A bolt of white-hot pain quickly returned Brennan to consciousness. Moaning, he blinked open his eyes. He was inside Genomex, and one of Eckhart's goons had just shot a sub-dermal governor into the back of his neck.  
  
"Aww crap..." His head was throbbing. This was definitely not turning out to be a good day.  
  
"My sentiments exactly," commented a familiar voice, also none too thrilled to be there.  
  
Rolling his aching head to the side, Brennan spotted Emma restrained in the chair next to his. Just great. The GSA had gotten them both.  
  
She gave him a tiny half-smile, reassuring him that she wasn't hurt. "They've been running tests on you for the past hour," she told him quietly. "I was worried."  
  
"I've been out that long?" he asked, frowning. He only vaguely recalled their little brawl with about two dozen GS agents. It had obviously been a set-up, but what did they want?  
  
"I think they drugged you," she replied nervously. "Whatever scans they ran on you, Eckhart seemed pleased with the results."  
  
Glancing around and wondering when the aforementioned white-haired creep was going to make an appearance, Brennan tugged experimentally at his restraints with no luck. But he noticed a cut across the back of his hand, and his ring was missing. He returned his focus to Emma. "It's us," he realized. "The whole point was to capture a couple members of Mutant X."  
  
"Bren..." Emma studied him carefully. Her ring hadn't been removed. "I think they specifically want you."  
  
His eyebrows raised in question. But before he could ask how she figured that, Eckhart and several others entered. The others weren't important, merely red-shirts who'd likely be gone by tomorrow.  
  
Brennan fixed his stare on Eckhart. "Adam isn't going to let you keep us here," he threatened. A rescue was probably being mounted right that second.  
  
Eckhart held up a small baggie with Brennan's ring in it. "Because of this?" he asked, somewhat amused. "Yes, I'm well aware that it can be tracked."  
  
From the smears of red on the inside of the plastic, Brennan decided he was a bit too aware. His hand had purposefully been sliced in order to coat his ring with his DNA.  
  
"Keeping that active is a bad idea," Emma warned him smugly. "I hope you're prepared for a thorough ass kicking any minute now."  
  
Eckhart regarded her with contempt. "It was such a pleasant surprise that you showed up, Miss DeLauro."  
  
One of his men hurriedly apologized. "I didn't know what else to do with her, sir. I know you only asked for the elemental."  
  
"What do you want with me?" Brennan inquired angrily.  
  
Eckhart gave him a nonchalant glance through those stupid glasses he always wore. "You're going to have the privilege of taking part in an experiment."  
  
Glaring stubbornly, Brennan replied, "I'd rather not."  
  
Eckhart remained perfectly composed. "I advise you to change your mind."  
  
"Go to hell," he retorted defiantly.  
  
With a nod, Eckhart said, "Very well." He turned to one of his lackeys. "Escort Miss DeLauro to a stasis pod."  
  
"Brennan..." she called nervously to him as her wrists were freed and she was forced to get up.  
  
"Don't," Brennan said, the word catching in his throat. Emma was his one weakness that could be exploited. "Leave her alone."  
  
"So you'll agree to cooperate?"  
  
He hesitated, wondering exactly what kind of deal he was making. Apparently he waited too long, because Emma suddenly dropped to floor, clearly in pain.  
  
"HEY!" Brennan yelled, jerking against his restraints. They'd activated her governor. He knew firsthand how much that hurt. He stared daggers into Eckhart. "You son of a bitch!"  
  
Emma had curled into a ball, but she was biting her lip to keep from crying. Brennan locked eyes with her. This was his fault.  
  
"Stop," he finally said. "I'll do whatever you want."  
  
"Bren, don't," Emma told him as her pain stopped. Her eyes pleaded with him not to make any deals.  
  
Taking his gaze off her, he return his view to Eckhart. "You have me. Now let her go."  
  
Eckhart nodded to the man who was standing over Emma. He pulled her to her feet, then held her firmly as another man slit the back of her hand. "Ouch," she hissed.  
  
Her blood was allowed to drip into another small plastic bag, then her ring was slipped from her finger. Eckhart handed the man Brennan's ring also. "Find a creative way to dispose of those."  
  
Brennan didn't like this at all. "Our deal was that you let her go."  
  
"I have you either way," Eckhart informed him. "You're in no position to make demands. She'll be kept merely as assurance that you won't fight us."  
  
"If you hurt her--" Brennan began.  
  
Holding up a hand, Eckhart silenced him. "Miss DeLauro won't be harmed unless you give us reason to do so. You have my word."  
  
With that, Brennan was released from the chair. He stood and allowed them to cuff his hands. Emma's hands were bound also. Then he walked without argument as they were escorted to the parking garage behind the building.  
  
"Care to tell us where we're going?" Emma asked as she and Brennan were forced into the back of one of the vans. The door was slammed behind them. "Didn't think so," she sighed.  
  
Brennan knew it was pointless, but he checked the door regardless. "Locked," he announced as the vehicle began to move.  
  
The windows were painted black so they couldn't see out. They were also separated from the front, unable to know how many men there were other than the driver. Emma leaned her back against the side of the van. "Adam won't know where to find us."  
  
Brennan nodded, sitting opposite her. "I'm sorry."  
  
"It's not your fault," she assured him. Then they sat in silence.  
  
Brennan reached up to touch his forehead and winced in pain. He looked at his fingers and discovered that they had dried blood on them.  
  
"Does that still hurt?" Emma asked with concern.  
  
He shook his head before probing at the cut once more. "Not really. I just thought I'd been hit from behind."  
  
She gave him a pained smile. "You were, but you landed on your face." She grimaced from the memory.  
  
He sighed. "Gracefully, I'm sure."  
  
At that moment, the van lurched and Emma fell forward. Brennan quickly reached to catch her, momentarily forgetting that his hands were bound, causing Emma to impact awkwardly with him, knocking them both over. She stared down at him, pinned to the floor beneath her. "I'm sure."  
  
Brennan looked back at her, making no move to free himself. His hands were trapped between them, and hers were against his shoulder, leaving their bodies pressed together and their faces mere inches apart.  
  
Emma had beautiful eyes. Brennan wondered were that thought came from. Probably the same place as the urge to kiss her. He'd had these feeling for quite a while, he just wasn't certain if he should act on them. Emma wasn't just somebody to flirt with. With her, it was serious, and that frightened him.  
  
She leaned in closer and he could feel her soft breath on his skin. All he had to do was make his move.  
  
Then the vehicle went over another bump in the road, causing them to smack noses. "Ouch..." they both said simultaneously as Emma pushed herself back up. The two of them started laughing.  
  
"You okay?" Brennan asked her.  
  
She grinned. "Yeah. You?"  
  
He laughed once more, not believing that had just happened. "Never better."  
  
Then they reached their destination. The back door slid open and Eckhart's men pulled them from the van. Then the front passenger door was opened and Eckhart himself got out. He looked at Emma. "Show her to her room," he instructed. "And take Mr. Mulwray to the lab."  
  
Brennan's arm was gripped none too gently as he was jerked in the opposite direction from where the other men were taking Emma. "Brennan!" she called worriedly.  
  
He turned to glance over his shoulder at her. "It's okay," he assured her. "I'll be fine."  
  
Then he was shoved through a doorway and led through a series of hallways. Whatever this compound was, it was fairly massive. Brennan wondered how it had managed to stay out of Mutant X's radar.  
  
As he willingly walked between the two large men who were guiding him, one thought weighed heavily on his mind. Adam didn't know where they were.  
  
-----  
  
TBC... 


	3. Complications

Upon reaching the lab, one of the two men left while the other remained. Brennan pulled his other arm free from the iron grasp, but he made no other attempt to move. He had to submit to whatever was about to be done to him, for Emma's sake.  
  
Two men in white lab coats entered. One was older, the other fairly young. Brennan glared at them. "Let's get this over with," he said, keeping the fear from his voice. There was something about doctors and sterile rooms that creeped him out.  
  
"Very well," the older doctor said while pulling on a pair of latex gloves. "Remove your clothes."  
  
Instantly biting his tongue, Brennan held back his retort. The guard still stood between him and the door, and any attempt at running would surely prove futile. Fine, if that's the way they wanted to play this. He wasn't going to give them the satisfaction of making him squirm.  
  
Holding out his bound hands, he waited for the cuffs to be unlocked. The young doctor, probably just an assistant, stepped forward and removed his restraints. Upon closer inspection, Brennan decided the kid was likely younger than he was.  
  
With his hands now free, Brennan pushed aside his modesty and stripped. He made no attempt to hide his nakedness. The young assistant watched him with a bit too much interest. Brennan stared right back. "Take a picture, it'll last longer."  
  
Blushing, the young man turned away. But Brennan's smug attitude was short- lived as he was forced to lie on his stomach on one of the metal examination tables. It was cold against his bare skin. He struggled to keep his breathing even as his ankles and wrists were moved into position and locked with the restraints.  
  
He pulled experimentally at them, every impulse inside him screaming orders to fight, to flee. Yet knowing Eckhart had Emma kept him frozen. And he told himself not to be afraid.  
  
Whatever was done to him now, Adam would fix it.  
  
He was hooked up to a monitor next, and it displayed his vital signs. Brennan seriously prayed they weren't expecting those to change. Then a scan was run over his entire body. When it was finished, somebody placed a sheet over him. It warded off the chill, yet it also meant they planned on keeping him where he was for a while.  
  
He spotted the large needle with his peripheral vision as the syringe was being filled. Then a strong hand was placed on the back of his head, holding him securely. Flesh, not gloved, so he knew it to be his guard, not one of the doctors. They were expecting him to fight this.  
  
"What are you doing to me?" he asked, his voice demanding an answer. Maybe he was being foolish to allow this.  
  
He was held more firmly. "Be still."  
  
Brennan didn't so much as blink as a slight pressure was applied to his sub- dermal governor. The needle was being inserted through it. He winced ever so slightly as it finally pierced the skin at the base of his neck. Then it was slowly pushed deeper. He tensed but managed to keep still.  
  
After what seemed an eternity, the needle was pulled back out, and his head was released. That's when the tingle started. It increased to an unpleasant warmth which steadily progressed throughout his body. The heat was accompanied by nausea and some discomfort.  
  
Then time skipped and he figured he must have blacked out because he was now lying on his back, and he was hooked up to all sorts of medical equipment. His head was swimming and the voices around him were fading in and out.  
  
Something had gone wrong. Eckhart would be pissed. That fact would have pleased Brennan had it not been for the problem being with him. And he didn't have a clue how serious it was. He hoped they'd gone through too much effort to capture him for them to just let him die.  
  
Adam wouldn't let that happen. He'd be intervening in this experiment any minute now. Adam would fix this. Brennan placed complete faith in that thought before losing consciousness.  
  
-----  
  
"What's the problem?" Eckhart asked into the microphone as he looked down at the lab through the observation window.  
  
One of the three doctors looked up at the glass. "He's rejecting the strand. We need to reverse the process or we'll lose the subject."  
  
Removing his glasses, Eckhart pinched the bridge of his nose. Hadn't they run tests to be certain Mulwray was compatible? He hit the talk button on the mike once more. "Proceed with the experiment as planned. And be certain he doesn't die."  
  
With that, Eckhart turned to leave. He had other things to attend to. And when he returned, there'd either be four live men in that room, or four dead ones.  
  
-----  
  
Emma waited in her room, which was more like a prison in her opinion, for something to happen. It had been hours, and she was more than a little nervous. She wanted Brennan. What if Eckhart didn't intend to ever let her see him again?  
  
Curling up into a ball in the corner, she rubbed her arms, feeling cold. It was surely quite late by now. Adam would have noticed that she and Brennan had never returned to Sanctuary. He, Shalimar, and Jesse were probably out looking for them.  
  
She tried to be optimistic, fully expecting to be found. But there was a fair amount of unease at not being able to use her gift to help the others locate her. Without that, she had no idea how long a search would take.  
  
However, she knew the rest of Mutant X would never quit trying until both she and Brennan were safe.  
  
-----  
  
It was 3:00am when the signals moved. The quiet beeping of his computer woke Adam from his light sleep.  
  
Brennan and Emma were no longer at Genomex. Adam adopted a troubled expression. He'd chosen not to act yet. They'd agreed it was best to wait until the graveyard shift went home and they could enter with the morning crew. Rubbing his eyes, Adam blinked at the screen. Why was Eckhart moving his kids in the middle of the night?  
  
He quickly pulled up a map and tried to locate the signals' current position. At quarter to four, the movement stopped. Two minutes later, the tracking devices went dead.  
  
-----  
  
Jesse took a deep breath of the brisk air as he leaned against the car and put his face in his hands. It had been early when Adam roused him, and now the sky was brightening with the first rays of dawn.  
  
The search parties were just getting started. Police and the coast guard had arrived even before Mutant X. After retrieving a jacket, Jesse headed back toward the water to wait with Adam and Shalimar.  
  
A witness had reported seeing several men dumping what looked like two bodies from a black van. Crews had spent the rest of the night working out what they called a search grid. What the red lines on the map really indicated was what area of the river they were going to drag to try to find the bodies.  
  
Standing beside Shalimar, Jesse stared out across the water. The scene didn't look any more hopeful in the cold light of day. This was the location Emma and Brennan's rings had last been active, and according to his research, there was nothing built under the river.  
  
One certain fact was that the two rings were indeed in the water. He could only pray that his friends weren't also.  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
Updates will likely be few and far between from here on out. I'm taking 21 credits and job hunting. In my spare time, I'm also writing an original screenplay. So I'm pretty busy, but life continues to suck, so I promise much more angst and pain as fic helps me cope.  
  
As always, feedback wanted. Send e-mail if you want me to reply. AliasJaneDoe@hotmail.com 


	4. Questions

Brennan came to as a rag was being held under his nose. He quickly jerked his head up. He was groggy, but considering he'd assumed he was dying the last time he'd been awake, he felt almost... better than usual. Tired, but strong.  
  
"Good, you're awake," the young doctor from earlier said, pocketing the obviously drugged rag that had been used to bring him around.  
  
Brennan groaned. His arms were stretched up over his head, his wrists cuffed and suspended from a hook which hung from the ceiling. His feet just touched the floor, and he straightened himself up to relieve the strain on his arms.  
  
He was dressed once more - loose white pants and a white shirt. He now matched the building, all the walls also being white. He looked at the young man who was still with him. "What's your name?" There were better questions, such as what the hell was going on, but he decided to try for something that might actually be answered.  
  
"Jordan," was the short reply.  
  
Okay, that was a start. "I'm Brennan," Brennan said, trying to get Jordan to view him as more than just a test subject.  
  
"I know who you are, Mulwray," Jordan said coldly before shining a penlight into his eyes.  
  
"And I see you've already decided you don't like me," Brennan commented.  
  
Jordan stared at him. "You're a criminal, a member of the outlaw gang known as Mutant X."  
  
"We're the good guys," Brennan defended himself. "Just who do you think you're working for? Eckhart is the criminal."  
  
"Mr. Eckhart is a government employee. He's only trying to help your kind."  
  
"My kind?" Brennan repeated. The way Jordan said it, he might as well have said freak. "You're no better than us. Geez, what are you, like 17? You're just a stupid kid who doesn't know anything. You get an after- school job working for Genomex and suddenly you've got a God complex."  
  
Brennan stopped talking and mentally scolded himself. He'd really chosen a great way to go about getting Jordan to sympathize with him. "Sorry," he finally said. "It's not your fault Eckhart is playing you."  
  
"You're very outspoken," Jordan told him. "Mr. Eckhart clearly explained things to me when I signed on to intern here."  
  
"Yeah," Brennan scoffed. "I'm sure he did."  
  
Jordan glared at him for a moment before offering him two small pills. "What are they?" Brennan asked.  
  
"Pain pills," Jordan informed him. "We do try to be as humane as possible."  
  
Brennan spit in the outstretched hand. "Pass."  
  
Tossing the pills onto the floor, Jordan gave him another disgusted look before turning to leave. Eckhart and the guard from before entered as he was about to go out.  
  
"Is he able to resume testing?" Eckhart asked Jordan.  
  
The intern nodded. "He came through the procedure perfectly. His initial rejection of the strand hasn't caused any ill effects," he told Eckhart before storming out.  
  
Eckhart casually strolled over to Brennan. "Congratulations on costing me a small fortune, Mr. Mulwray. You continue to torment me even while unconscious."  
  
Glaring at him, Brennan tossed out a, "Anything I can do to make your life more interesting."  
  
Eckhart looked to the other man. "You may begin," he told him before also exiting.  
  
"So what's next on the agenda?" Brennan asked his guard. In response, he received a hard backhand to his face. After spitting the blood from his mouth, he asked, "What the hell was that for?"  
  
The man struck him again. Brennan's head whipped to the side and he lost his footing. He slowly got back into a standing position. "Is this a 'don't speak unless spoken to' kind of thing?"  
  
The next blow was delivered to his stomach, effectively silencing him. When he recovered from the hit, Brennan didn't say a word. He just waited.  
  
Another punch followed the last and Brennan was forced to gasp for air. Shit, that hurt. He looked up at the man. He hadn't spoken that time. "You need to decide what rules we're playing by here."  
  
That remark earned him several more hits, one right after the other. And he still couldn't figure out what the point of this was.  
  
-----  
  
Brennan eventually lost track of how many times he'd been hit. He'd stopped talking entirely, but the blows continued. The other man never said a thing.  
  
Slumping against his restraints, Brennan just allowed the punches to fall. He was on verge of passing out.  
  
As the man drew his hand back to deliver yet another blow, the door opened and Jordan entered. "He's had enough."  
  
The assault stopped and Brennan leaned his head back, taking deep breaths and trying to combat the pain. It was finally over.  
  
Jordan moved to take his pulse, and Brennan found himself staring at him. "You call this humane?" he mumbled.  
  
Jordan removed his hand and refused to look at Brennan. "Let him down, then take him to his room."  
  
The second Brennan's hands were released, he sagged, collapsing. Jordan actually moved to catch him instead of letting him drop to the floor. Brennan leaned heavily on him, slight aftershocks from the abuse wracking his body.  
  
Then his arm was gripped and he was pulled to his feet. He thought he detected a hint of remorse in Jordan's expression before he was led out.  
  
-----  
  
As soon as Brennan was inside the room, the door was locked behind him. He instantly sank the to floor and rested his head on his knees.  
  
"Brennan!"  
  
He looked up as Emma rushed over to him. He hadn't expected to be allowed to share a room with her. He gave her a faint smile.  
  
She was immediately by his side, lifting his face toward the light so she could inspect the bruising. She pushed his hair back and stared into his eyes. "Are you okay?"  
  
"It's not that serious," he told her, trying not to let on how much pain he was actually in.  
  
Noticing his cuffed hands, she touched the metal before slipping her hand into his. "What did Eckhart want?"  
  
Brennan just shook his head. That's what he didn't understand. "I don't know." He leaned against the wall, then decided he needed to lie down. The room was empty, connecting only to a small bathroom. They'd have to sleep on the floor.  
  
As he moved, his shirt shifted and allowed Emma to catch a glimpse of the bare skin at his waist. She instantly reached for the edge of the shirt.  
  
He tried to stop her from looking. "Em, don't."  
  
She pushed aside his hands and lifted the material anyway. His entire chest was marred with bruises. She fought not to cry. "Why would they do this?"  
  
Brennan couldn't answer that. He'd been tortured without a reason. "He didn't ask me anything."  
  
Brennan's head swam a bit then, and Emma seemed to notice. "Are you sure you're okay?"  
  
"Been better," he mumbled before promptly passing out.  
  
-----  
  
The pain was gone and he felt content. Brennan stirred slightly, feeling the warmth pressed against his side. Emma was sleeping next to him. This felt... good.  
  
Brennan took a deep breath as the vale of sleep slipped away. He didn't wish to wake. This dream felt so right. He wrapped his arms around Emma, realizing that they were still cuffed, and she snuggled closer with a faint sigh.  
  
Unable to hang on to his dreams, Brennan settled for watching Emma sleep. She looked peaceful. But they couldn't stay like this. Eckhart would return for him, and he needed to shed the haze of sleep and be ready.  
  
Gently, he slipped Emma from his arms and got up. He walked to the small bathroom and turned on the sink, splashing water on his face. That would have to do since there was no shower.  
  
He stared at his reflection in the mirror. That wasn't right. He leaned closer to the glass and touched his face. There was no bruise on his jaw. He quickly felt his forehead, discovering that cut to be absent as well.  
  
He stepped back. This was a bit too peculiar. Hesitantly, he pulled his shirt over his head and let it gather around his bound wrists. Then he noticed the figure in the mirror, watching him. He turned to face Emma.  
  
Slowly, she reached out and laid her hand on his chest. Then her gaze darted to his face. "I don't understand."  
  
"Neither do I," he said, looking in the mirror once more.  
  
All his injuries were completely gone.  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
I love it when you guys beg me to write more, but FYI, I write ten times faster when I receive actual comments that are constructive. However, if all you feel like saying is "gimme more," by no means should you stop leaving reviews. I still get a kick out of the little responses.  
  
AliasJaneDoe@hotmail.com 


	5. Plans

The unblinking eye of the camera watched him as he paced. Eckhart had somebody observing them. He turned to Emma. "I don't like this."  
  
She glanced up from where she was sitting across the small room. "What's this even mean?" she asked. "We're certain only one night has gone by, right? Which leaves only... Why would Eckhart give an enemy the ability to heal?"  
  
"No reason. Unless he wants it for himself," Brennan speculated. "Making me merely a lab rat."  
  
"We need to find a way out of here," Emma said, hoping their cell wasn't also bugged. "If he's testing the effectiveness of... whatever this is... then--"  
  
"I know," Brennan cut her off. It wasn't looking too good for him.  
  
She got up and moved close to him, stopping his pacing. She leaned into his ear. "I want you to fight back," she said quietly, disguising her comment in a hug. "Don't hold back on my account. Don't let them hurt you."  
  
"Emma..." He trailed off as their door was opened. The same guard stood there. Brennan gave Emma's hand a quick squeeze before following him out.  
  
And the door slid shut behind them.  
  
-----  
  
"Remove your clothes and lie down," Brennan was instructed after his hands were once again freed.  
  
He obeyed, but all the while he devoted his attention to memorizing the room. It was the same lab he'd been taken to before. If escape was possible, he'd need to do it while his restraints were off.  
  
Taking out the main doctor and Jordan would be easy. His guard would be more of a challenge. It was probably best to attack him first, use the element of surprise. After that, he'd need to free Emma. The route back had already been learned.  
  
The door lock would require a handprint. He could take Jordan hostage until he got past it. There were maps on the walls he could use to find the way back to the parking garage. He'd need to hot-wire one of the vehicles the old-fashioned way, but it was doable.  
  
Once outside, they'd ditch the car and make a call to Adam. The Helix could pick him and Emma up and return them to Sanctuary.  
  
He finished undressing and obediently laid down on one of the tables. He'd wait until the next session to act. He needed the time to make sure he knew the plan. And Eckhart needed to think he was cooperating.  
  
He was lying on his back this time, and he couldn't help feeling very exposed once his wrists and ankles were secured. A scan was run, then he was provided with a sheet. The main doctor left.  
  
"Well?" Brennan asked Jordan who was now the only one with him. The young man gave him a curious look. "What did the scan have to say?"  
  
"This will hurt a bit," Jordan said before pricking him and taking several vials of his blood. He moved to a counter and began to label them. "According to your scan, your body is adapting well to the Messiah Strand. Rejection should no longer be a problem."  
  
"What is that?" Brennan asked as Jordan returned to his side.  
  
"You don't need to know that information." Jordan began feeling Brennan's abdomen. "Let me know if there's any pain."  
  
There surprisingly wasn't any discomfort as Jordan pressed against skin that had so recently been badly bruised. He slowly worked his way up Brennan's chest. It was tempting to lie and say that it hurt, but Brennan wasn't eager to find out what would happen if they discovered he wasn't telling the truth.  
  
"When do you plan on feeding me?" he asked next. He was more than a little hungry.  
  
"Your metabolism will adjust," Jordan stated.  
  
That caused Brennan to frown. "What about Emma?"  
  
The pressure Jordan was using suddenly became much firmer. "She'll be looked after," he replied stiffly. "You care deeply for her?"  
  
Brennan wasn't certain how to reply to that. He got the impression Jordan wasn't fond of her at all. "She's family," he said carefully.  
  
Jordan's hands had stopped moving and were just resting on Brennan's chest now. Seeming to notice this, he quickly removed them and snapped off his gloves. "You seem fine."  
  
"Good." Brennan watched him suspiciously. "What now?"  
  
"You'll receive the next injection." He paused. "You shouldn't react as strongly this time," he added softly, almost an apology.  
  
Brennan caught his eyes. "Next injection? Why, what for?"  
  
"If we'd forced you to go through the entire process in one shot, it would have killed you. We're going to continue gradually as we continue testing."  
  
If whatever they were doing to him wasn't complete, that gave him a good chance of Adam being able to reverse it. He just needed to be rescued first. "What is the next part of the tests?"  
  
"Do you want something for the pain?" Jordan offered, looking away.  
  
"Yes." Brennan knew now it wasn't for the pain he was currently in, but for what was to come. He shouldn't have refused the last time.  
  
He was at the counter a moment before returning. Jordan made no move release his binds, rather he simply extended his hand to Brennan, two pills in his palm. Brennan opened his mouth, and Jordan dropped the pills onto his tongue, then he supported Brennan's head with one hand and held a cup of water to his lips with other so that he could wash them down.  
  
After he succeeded in swallowing them, Jordan wiped the spilt water from Brennan's chin. He left his thumb on Brennan's face a while longer than was necessary, making him uncomfortable. He couldn't decide if Jordan was just becoming attached to his lab rat and wanted him as a pet, or if the youth was interested in him for entirely different reasons.  
  
Brennan tried to take it as a good sign either way. Jordan was beginning to take an interest in him, and he wanted him to feel involved.  
  
-----  
  
The door was opened once more and Emma looked up. A man stood there, but not the one who'd taken Brennan.  
  
"Come with me."  
  
She slowly rose. "Where's Brennan?"  
  
"As far as I know, your companion is in one of the labs," he told her.  
  
"What are they doing to him?" She didn't want him to be hurt again.  
  
The man glared at her. "You'll come with me now if you want to be fed."  
  
Her first thought was to decline. She couldn't eat without Brennan.  
  
When she made no move, the man turned to leave. "Suite yourself."  
  
"Wait." Emma hesitantly followed him. It would do her no good to go hungry, and she couldn't escape if she allowed herself to become weak. Instead, she'd keep up her strength, planning for it to be needed when the chance arose to run.  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
Can somebody please fill me in on "Nothing to Fear"? If the whole healing thing has already been done, I'm killing this story and writing something else. 


	6. Doubts

I'm not going to be able to update for a while due to RL keeping me from writing, so this part is twice as long as normal. However, I was in a horrible mood when I wrote it, so I feel kinda bad for Brennan. Oh well. Onward!  
  
----- -----  
  
The injection didn't cause him to pass out this time, but Brennan still felt strange as he was taken to the room where he'd been beaten before. He was disoriented and his blood seemed to tingle as it moved through his veins.  
  
His same guard, whom Brennan now considered his handler since he was always around, locked his arms above his head once more. Then he walked to the other side of the room and got something before returning to stand behind Brennan.  
  
As the back of his shirt was pushed up to expose his skin, Brennan braced himself. He'd already been told what was going to happen. Jordan had informed him that he would be lashed fifty times. He'd thought there must be a better way to test the healing effects of this Messiah Strand or whatever it was called. The older doctor, who'd also been there, had simply replied, "Probably," in a matter of fact tone.  
  
Taking a deep breath, he told himself he could handle this. Attempting escape while he was still feeling the side-effects of the drug would get him nowhere.  
  
Even prepared, Brennan cried out as the first lash seared across his back. His skin burned from his shoulder down to where his pants had stopped the contact at his hips.  
  
He tossed his head back tried to breathe. That had been worse than he'd expected. But he *could* get through this. Steeling himself, he bowed his head and waited.  
  
The next snapped at his neck and ripped a path down diagonally and along his side. Brennan bit down on the material of his shirt which was gathered under his chin and used it to gag his scream. His handler hadn't found the proper strike with the first, that much was obvious now. This one had torn his flesh. He could feel the drop of blood slowly making its way along his skin.  
  
Before he could get his breathing back under control, the next lash fell. Lurching forward to avoid the main extend of the blow, Brennan stumbled. His arms jerked harshly, almost being pulled from their sockets as the chain stopped his collapse.  
  
He spit the shirt from his mouth in order to draw in air. His breathing was too choked for him to cry out as he forced himself back to his feet. He took in a hard breath and held it, gripping the chain so his wrists wouldn't be rubbed raw the next time. Setting his jaw in determination, he locked his legs.  
  
He was ready this time. He wouldn't scream.  
  
Fire exploded across his back once more, and he fell again despite his efforts, but he managed to hold back his cry. He took some pride in that small victory. He wouldn't give them the satisfaction of breaking him.  
  
Four down.  
  
Screwing his eyes shut, he tried to ride out the most recent pain. He got his feet back under him, and somehow stayed standing through the next seven lashes. On twelve, his knees buckled and he was unable to get back up. But at least they'd fallen into a pattern.  
  
He'd exhale every time he felt the flesh of his back be torn, inhaling during the slight pause between. It became a rhythm. It was the only way he could breathe. The pain seemed to dull slightly, but every new welt caused revived agony. He focused on that fresh infliction, using it to distract him from the burn of the old. If he could take this one at a time, he'd make it.  
  
So why was he still counting?  
  
The rips in his skin were starting to overlap each other now, and Brennan wondered if his back would left permanently crisscrossed with scars. Or maybe there'd be no gaps where he hadn't been cut by the time this was over.  
  
Emma was going to flip out when she saw his back. He knew she would look. The edges of some of the wounds would be visible even with his shirt back in place.  
  
Emma... He prayed nobody was hurting her. He could survive this, but he didn't think he could cope if anybody touched her.  
  
Allowing himself the distraction of thinking about Emma gave him a temporary reprieve from the torment of his own body, but it also caused him to miss one of his breaths between hits. He was forced to start laboring and couldn't let his thoughts wander.  
  
The pain was mounting, becoming too much, and Brennan's vision began to cloud. He closed his eyes once more, keeping his head down and trying to remain limp. It was easier when he wasn't tense.  
  
By the halfway mark, the agony was extreme. His hands were slippery with sweat as he gripped the chains. This was going to destroy him. He could feel the electricity inside him seeking release. He needed to fight back! If he let this continue, it would kill him - even if not physically, he'd be shattered emotionally.  
  
A surge went through his body and he spasmed slightly. He'd instinctively tried to use his power, and the governor was combating the reflex. He couldn't even cause a spark with the modified version of the governor; he'd tried earlier and failed.  
  
He instantly attempted to squelch his abilities. He needed to let himself go completely, separate himself from the pain. He made his mind think of anything else, anywhere else. He needed the escape even if it meant not breathing.  
  
But in the back of his mind, he was still counting.  
  
He lost consciousness right before lash thirty-eight.  
  
-----  
  
Fingers were being run over his back when he started to come to. Gloved, yet not latex this time. Possibly leather, expensive. They caused a slight sting as they traced over his partially healed skin which was still tender.  
  
"Impressive," Eckhart's voice said, causing Brennan to open his eyes with a moan. He rotated his shoulder, yanking away from the man. "Did that hurt? I apologize."  
  
As Eckhart pulled his shirt back into place - still wet with his blood, sweat, saliva, and tears - and then quit touching him, Brennan mumbled something along the lines of, "Go to hell." He'd made it clear that he didn't care about inflicting pain.  
  
"Of that I have no doubt," Eckhart replied. "But not for a very long time, I assure you."  
  
"Take me back to Emma," ordered Brennan.  
  
"Not quite yet." Eckhart turned to Brennan's handler. "Cut him more deeply."  
  
As the man drew a switchblade from his pocket, Eckhart added, "This will only hurt momentarily."  
  
Brennan grimaced as the blade was flipped open. "Why don't you be the bigger man and test this wonder drug out on yourself?" he asked before his handler moved into his personal space.  
  
"I have a tendency not to trust anything of Adam's these days," Eckhart answered, stepping back to watch.  
  
Adam? Brennan jerked his head up. What could Adam possibly have to do with this?  
  
Before he could question things further, he was forced to attempt a dodge as his handler quickly moved to slice him. The material of his shirt was cut from his shoulder across to his waist. Looking down, Brennan saw that the edges of the tear were red, but he knew the wound wasn't very deep.  
  
As the man prepared to take another strike, Brennan shoved himself forward and head-butted him. Hard. He knew he'd just hurt himself worse than his handler, but he did cause the other man to stumble back.  
  
Prepared, Brennan instantly shifted his weight back, grabbing the chains at his wrists and using them to help swing his bound feet up together in a smooth motion. He landed the kick directly to the man's chest.  
  
When he stumbled, Brennan swung himself once more, knocking his handler's legs out from under him and taking him to the floor. Brennan grinned, feeling the man's pockets with his toes in search of the cuff key.  
  
Off to the side, Eckhart applauded. "Like I said, you are very impressive, Mr. Mulwray." He nudged Brennan's handler with his foot. "Get up. I expected better from you."  
  
Quickly rousing, the man shoved himself up before his pocket was able to be picked, looking none too pleased with Brennan. In a fast motion, he placed his foot on the chain between Brennan's ankles, securely keeping his feet in place. Then he reached around and wrapped his arm about Brennan's neck, twisting his head and covering his mouth with his hand.  
  
Locked against the man's body, Brennan was immobile. It was also a position in which it would easy for the other man to snap his neck if he tried any further stunts. Knowing he didn't have permission to kill him yet, Brennan attempted biting the hand.  
  
The switchblade, which had been retrieved when the man had gotten up, was swiftly stabbed forward, imbedding itself in Brennan's stomach. His handler held him more tightly as his body jerked, the hand over his mouth still silencing him.  
  
Brennan's entire body tensed impulsively, and he fought against the hand which prevented him from sucking in the much needed air. He could feel the full length of the blade impaling him, held firmly into his body, the other man making no move to release him. There was a metallic taste in his mouth, and he wondered if the blood was his or if he'd succeeded in biting the hand. For a second, he thought he was going to die right there.  
  
Waiting for Brennan to still, his handler finally drew the blade back, twisting it as he pulled it free. Brennan's body spasmed, and he waited again before releasing him.  
  
Brennan's only sound was a pained gasp. He couldn't even scream. He stared at the blade which was sheathed in his blood. His eyes locked in place even after his handler moved from his sight. His body wouldn't respond to him at all.  
  
Eckhart had just taken this experiment to a level which truly scared him.  
  
-----  
  
Gentle hands replaced the rough ones before he could collapse, and Brennan felt himself being helped to lie down. His eyes still wouldn't focus.  
  
He knew that two men had taken him back to his room, since he hadn't been able to walk, but everything else was a blur. Somebody brushed his damp hair back from his forehead.  
  
"Brennan, please look at me..." Emma pleaded, her voice afraid.  
  
His head was resting in her lap, and he tried to respond to her. He knew he could still see, but nothing was registering. He trembled uncontrollably. "I fought back..."  
  
Removing her jacket, Emma draped it over him. "You're in shock." Her tone held a forced calmness as she continued to attempt to soothe him. She was also trying to stop the bleeding.  
  
"Adam," Brennan managed to choke out, thinking about Eckhart's words. Emma said something about how they'd be rescued soon, and he didn't have the strength to tell her that wasn't what he meant. He didn't even know what he meant.  
  
Did he actually believe Adam was in some way a part of this? Responsible. He decided his clouded mind was falling perfectly into Eckhart's deception. He forced himself not to doubt Adam. Adam was his friend. Adam was going to fix this. He'd never be involved with Eckhart.  
  
Would he?  
  
-----  
  
Emma kept Brennan's head cradled in her lap as she absently ran her fingers through his sweat-damp hair. The bleeding had stopped, but Brennan was in bad shape. She could still feel his slight shaking, and his breathing was continuing to get worse.  
  
"I'm scared, Em," he said weakly.  
  
She continued stroking his hair. Her other hand was locked in his, both coated with blood that was nearly gluing their intertwined fingers together. "So am I." Over the past hour, his condition had steadily deteriorated.  
  
"I should be showing signs of improvement by now." Instead he felt as though he were dying. "I don't think I'm going to heal."  
  
She squeezed his hand more firmly. "Maybe you just need more time."  
  
"Or maybe Eckhart crossed the line." Brennan closed his eyes and didn't have the strength to open them again. Perhaps they'd discovered the extent of the drug's usefulness.  
  
"It could be something we're just not seeing," suggested Emma, refusing to believe he might be fatally wounded. "Maybe it's like our powers and there's a trigger or something."  
  
Brennan shifted position but never opened his eyes. His breathing had grown too shallow for him to be getting enough air. "I can't stay awake any longer," he told her.  
  
Emma suddenly stilled. Could it be that simple? "Then maybe you don't," she speculated, trying to form a theory. "What if that's the answer? I mean, the last time you healed, you were unconscious, Brennan."  
  
"So I just let myself pass out and I wake up better?" He blinked his eyes half way open and turned his head to look at her.  
  
"Maybe," she answered nervously.  
  
He rested silently for several minutes before shaking with a pained laugh. "Ironically, I think I'm too afraid to sleep."  
  
"It's okay," she said softly. "I'm not going to let anything happen to you, Brennan." He'd lose consciousness soon regardless of whether it was intentional or not.  
  
With a small moan, he settled himself back as comfortably as possible. "I know it's wrong," he said after a minute, "but I'm glad you're with me, Em. I wish you weren't, but I don't know if I could handle this on my own."  
  
"It's okay," she said again, watching him start to drift. If given the option, she didn't think she'd be able to leave him. "Just sleep now."  
  
With a soft sigh, he surrendered and let the exhaustion claim him. He only hoped she was correct in believing he'd wake up again.  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
For those of thinking this needs more about Adam and the others, I'm actually leaning the opposite way and wondering if I shouldn't have mentioned them at all. This story is about Brennan. But I suppose I will have to get back to them and their search at some point, but they are a very minor subplot.  
  
As for my notes being in separate chapters, is that really bothering you guys? I did add a part every time I stuck in a note, so I didn't think I was being misleading by updating and not giving any story.  
  
Finally, do I need a beta-reader? Normally, I'd say HECK YES. Your beta is your best friend. Have you hugged your beta-reader today? If not, please go let them know they're loved. But anyway, since I'm posting as a WiP, going through a beta-reader will slow things down slightly. However, I'm not sure I can pass up the offer. You guys decide. 


	7. Emotions

  
Agitated, Jesse strummed his fingers on the edge of the keyboard. He couldn't think. Hopping out of his chair, he decided to go for a drive. He knew he'd likely end up back at the river. The search was about to be called off completely. He wasn't sure if that was a good thing or not.

He walked past Adam on his way out but decided not to bother him since was in the middle of a call. However, the strained expression on Adam's face made him stop.

"I'll be right down," Adam said before closing the connection. He turned away from the monitor and noticed that he wasn't alone. "How long have you been standing there?"

Jesse shrugged. "Who was that?"

Adam squeezed the bridge of his nose as if trying to ward off a migraine. "A friend of mine with the police. He keeps an eye out when new mutants get into trouble."

"What did he want?" Jesse couldn't believe Adam was willing to abandon the search also in favor of helping some stranger.

"The coast guard might have found Brennan." He pulled on his coat. "I need to go ID the body."

-----

"Male, mid-twenties, dark hair..." Agent Davis shook his head sadly. "I know you've been looking for your boy in that area, Adam."

Adam swallowed before speaking. "I appreciate you calling me."

His friend nodded. "Marcy will take you back."

Adam hardly noticed as he was handed off to the middle-aged blonde. He was too busy concentrating on the task of walking. Placing one foot in front of the other had never required so much thought before.

Marcy gave him a sympathetic little smile. "Are you the father?"

"Yes." The lie was in case it was Brennan. Adam didn't want any trouble because he wasn't legally related. In fact, he didn't even know whom Brennan might have listed as next of kin. But the lie had come far too easily, slipping past Adam's lips without conscious thought. If Brennan was dead, he wanted the body to be released to him.

Everything blurred together and Adam merely went through the motions until he was standing in front of the body. Somebody unzipped the plastic of the body-bag and pulled it back to reveal the head and shoulders of the corpse.

Adam closed his eyes for a minute before turning and hurriedly leaving the morgue. Then he leaned against the wall and caught his breath. Someone offered to get him a cup of water but he refused. He was emotionally exhausted, but he'd be alright.

It wasn't Brennan.

Somewhere, he was certain Mason was having a long laugh at his expense.

-----

The needle was inside his neck when consciousness returned. This time, Brennan savored the rush of warmth in spite of the pain. His energy was completely gone.

He quickly warned himself not to start liking it. With every injection, his blood seemed to run hotter, and the governor didn't allow him to release the building charge of power through an electrical drain. Once he fully healed, he'd be wired.

Yet it made him stronger. With Eckhart increasing the damage his so-called "tests" inflicted, Brennan needed the step up. And the rush removed the chill left behind from the torture, the blood loss...

He closed his eyes again, waiting for the heat to balance out, and somebody slapped his face just hard enough to make sure he knew he wasn't supposed to go back to sleep.

"Is he ready to proceed?" Eckhart asked.

"He should be allowed to rest longer first," Jordan said. "The strand isn't at full strength yet, so the experiments are taking a toll on him."

Eckhart looked to the other doctor for a second opinion. "He is displaying signs of fatigue; however, I still believe we're able to push forward."

"Do it," Eckhart instructed. The doctor nodded to him as he exited. Jordan left shortly behind Eckhart.

Brennan silently cursed. He'd been hoping to get a chance to talk with Jordan again. He was fairly young and already being forced into the disciplined life of working for Genomex. Brennan doubted he enjoyed the structured atmosphere of always doing as he was told without question.

Which made Jordan the perfect target. Forging a friendship with a member of Mutant X was forbidden. Taking an interest in Brennan would be dangerous. That's why it would be alluring.

-----

Emma carefully slipped off her last article of clothing, making certain to keep her back to the camera. She would have refused the chance to shower, but she needed to get clean. Turning on the water, she stepped just beyond the reach of the spray.

She stared at her palm before washing away the blood. There were smears where Brennan's hand had been. Closing her eyes, she refused to dwell on what had happened. He'd been taken from her that morning before he'd waken. At least she assumed it was morning. It was hard to tell without windows. She wondered if he'd come to by now.

Stepping under the spray, she let the blood be washed clean. She sucked in a shaking breath, tired from the sleepless night. It was only blood. Blood from a wound that would be gone when she saw him again. Taking in several more fast breaths, she forced herself back under control. She'd been fine during the night, caring for Brennan and thinking of nothing else. Yet now... she was alone, scared, and didn't have something more important to place her attention on. There was nobody right now who needed her to be calm and collected, no one in need of comforting... except herself.

She was better when dealing with others - dealing with something and not just waiting. But she told herself to wait, and all would be fine. She could pretend none of this was permanent. She could pretend Brennan would be able to cope and, once healed, the injury would no longer affect him. Pretend until if they drew his blood again...

His breathing had returned to normal after a few hours, but she'd still been worried. She thought the knife wound had healed also, but she hadn't been able to look again before he was taken. A young doctor had promised they'd help him if he didn't wake soon. For some reason, she'd wanted to trust him.

Nobody had done anything to harm her yet, and she wondered if that would last. She almost wished Eckhart was interested in her just so he wouldn't be so fixated on Brennan.

She scrubbed her face next, trying not to start crying. She was letting herself become an emotional wreck. She'd been told she would be given something to eat again after she'd had a chance to clean herself up. Right now, the very thought of food made her sick to her stomach.

Knowing Brennan likely hadn't been offered anything the entire time they'd been here wasn't helping her appetite either. She didn't think he could last much longer under these conditions, even with Eckhart's drugs. 

Her chest clenched up when she thought that this might continue until they killed him. She'd never noticed when he'd become such a huge part of her life. But looking at the idea of life without him actually hurt.

It ached far more than she thought it should.

-----

Losing his balance as he was tossed into his room, Brennan landed hard on his shoulder and moaned. Pushing himself up, he traced his fingers through the blood on the floor. The room spun as he eventually stood.

He was alone. He didn't allow himself time to wonder where Emma was, instead opting to deal with his immediate problem. He stumbled to the bathroom and held his arms over the sink as he bled. Pulling his shirt over his head, he urgently began to tear the material.

When he managed to get the shirt ripped into two pieces, he needed to stop in order to catch the edge of the counter to steady himself. His hands were no longer bound, but in place of the metal cuffs were two lines of red where his wrists had been slit deep along the veins. He was fast losing blood.

Wrapping his shirt around his left wrist, he used his other hand to attempt tugging it tight. He wasn't very successful and ended up clenching the shirt in his teeth in order to finally make the knot secure enough.

As he started to bind his other wrist, his vision blurred and he reached out and grabbed for the wall to steady himself. Then he was suddenly on the floor. He gave up on trying to stop the blood flow. His shirt was already completely red. And what use was fighting? Eckhart would just do this experiment again.

He hadn't bled to death from the knife wound, so his wrists had been cut. He wondered what would come next if he didn't die from this.

-----

When he woke, his head was in Emma's lap once more and she was softly stroking his hair. He blinked open his eyes and stared up at her. "Hi."

She instantly dumped him from her lap, then knocked him over as she enveloped him in a massive hug. "Thank god, Brennan, you're awake; you scared me to death."

He carefully freed himself from her crushing grip enough to be able to breathe. "Apparently."

"I was so worried," she blurted.

"I gathered that." He smiled at her as he straightened himself back up with Emma still clinging to him. That's when he noticed a lot of the contact was against bare skin. He finally managed to pull back slightly. Neither of them was wearing a shirt, and hers seemed to be tied around his wrists and stained red. "Is this blood?"

At that, she let him go and turned away.

"Shit." It all suddenly came back to him. That question had definitely been the wrong thing to say. She was stripped down to her bra because she'd done the same thing he had and used her shirt to try to stop the bleeding. She must have found him lying on the floor.

"Emma, I'm sorry," he apologized. He turned her back toward him and saw the unshed tears in her eyes, and her face was a bit blotchy, signifying those weren't the first. She'd been crying... because of him. He'd really frightened her.

"You weren't breathing, Brennan," she said, her voice wavering.

"I'm fine now," he said seriously, attempting to stay calm while letting her words sink in. Then he decided that he didn't want them to sink in.

"Tell me that when there isn't a pool of your blood on the floor," she snapped back angrily.

"Hey!" He grabbed her arm. For her sake, he couldn't afford to let this phase him. "Stop it, Em. Look at me. I'm fine."

She was still staring past him and he made her face him. "Don't look at it," he said about the blood, not turning around himself but knowing there had to be a lot of it. He cupped her chin in his hand and stared into her eyes. "Look at me."

Trembling, she let herself focus only on him. She'd almost lost him. She started crying, her gaze dropping to her bloodstained shirt that still bound his wrists.

"At me," he said again, then tenderly brushed his lips across her cheek, removing the tear. She closed her eyes and felt the soft touch of lips against her eyelid next, then he placed a trail of kisses in her hair. All the while he was murmuring for her to hush, please don't cry.

"It's okay," he soothed, pulling her closer to him. "I'm alright. It's okay..."

She melted into his embrace, snuggling against his shoulder. She moved her hand to his chest, feeling his warm skin under her fingers. Then she slid her head down to where her hand was, listening to his heartbeat as he comforted her.

"I love you," she told him while wrapped in his arms.

He held her tighter, pressing his cheek against her soft hair. "Always."

-----

TBC...


	8. Ethics

Sorry about the delay. Here's a nice long part for you.

Also, I've decided I should have a beta-reader. I'd prefer somebody who's fast, honest, and not afraid to tell me when something sucks. I'd like for you to have gotten an A in a college level English class, but I'm willing to let that slide since I was beta-reading at 13 and some of the best fic writers I've come across have been still in high school.

E-mail if interested.

-----

-----

Brennan giggled.

Emma raised her eyebrows at him. "What?" They'd been in the middle of an incredibly intimate moment and he'd started laughing?

"Nothing."

Was he blushing? "What?" she demanded, her brow furrowed now.

"Well, it's just, you know, that whole looking back on a bad situation and laughing thing..." he mumbled.

She failed to find anything remotely funny in the fact that a short while ago she'd been pleading with him to wake up, to not leave her alone here. "Have you lost your mind?"

"I can see your underwear," he answered sheepishly, trying desperately not to stare at her chest.

She gave him a scolding look, still not seeing the humor. "I'm glad that amuses you."

"I just never pictured you as the lacy bra type," he explained. "Sheesh, is that a flower?"

She instantly slapped his hand away. "BRENNAN!"

"So still not even a little bit funny, huh?"

She glared at him before softening a bit. Maybe he needed it to be funny. That was better than the alternative after all. "So you've pictured me in my underwear?"

"No," he said a bit too quickly, shaking his head and feeling somewhat dizzy.

Pretending to pout, she did her best to look disappointed. "Why not?"

He was a bit taken aback by that. "Hey, no fair teasing the guy suffering from massive blood loss. You know I'm screwed no matter what I say."

"True," she smirked at him. And she had to admit the situation was sort of funny once she accepted that he was okay. "Who'd have ever thought we'd end up locked in a room together half naked due to Eckhart?"

"Remind me to send him a thank you card once we're home." Grinning, he reached out and playfully snapped her bra strap. "It's pink." He couldn't hold back his laugh.

"Don't snap my bra straps," she warned him.

"I'm a guy, Emma," he told her. "We see a cute girl in her underwear, and we're required to snap her bra straps. It's in the rule book."

She arched an eyebrow at him once more. "Is that so?"

"Yeah. I'd tell you to look it up, but the first rule of the rule book is no sharing the rule book with girls."

She shook her head and laughed. "You're making this up."

"Am not."

"Even with a governor, I'm still picking up the liar vibes."

"Alright, fine," he relented. "There's no rule book. But when I tell Jesse all about this, I can't have him thinking I didn't take full advantage of the situation," he teased.

"You're not telling Jesse about this," she threatened.

A mischievous grin spread across his face. "What, are you kidding? That's the first thing I'm doing."

"And I mistook you for mature," she said, crossing her arms over her chest.

"A mistake you'll never make again," Brennan joked before ruthlessly starting to tickle her.

After getting way out of control and rolling around on the floor for a while, Emma had him pinned beneath her. "I ended up on top again," she bragged, referring to back in the van.

"It wasn't a fair fight," Brennan only half complained. "I'm still woozy."

Emma smiled down at him before thinking of something. "You know Eckhart just got this on tape."

Now it was Brennan's turn to smile. "You wanna give him a real show?" He raised his eyebrows suggestively at her.

She patted his cheek and gave him a "nice try" look before getting up. "I'll let ya know."

Brennan kept smiling. There wasn't a chance in hell.

-----

"You've lost weight," Jordan remarked as Brennan stepped off the scale.

"Yeah, that tends to be a side-effect of the starvation," Brennan retorted.

"Are you hungry?"

Actually, he wasn't really. He knew his metabolism was adjusting to the absence of food, yet he still wondered how long he could go before eventually starving to death. "Do you care?"

"Yes," Jordan replied honestly. "Sit. I need to get another blood sample."

Somewhat thrown by Jordan's confession of caring, Brennan actually sat and allowed himself to be restrained once more. He'd been planning to bolt while it was just him and Jordan, but he'd be far more likely to succeed if the young man was on his side. Maybe continued cooperation would be worth his while.

As Jordan drew a vial of his blood, Brennan seemed to get his wits back. "Why do you need that? Didn't you mop enough up off the floor?"

Jordan didn't say anything for a while. He gave Brennan a sad look. "The next test is designed to measure your tolerance to pain, so I won't be able to give you any more meds."

Brennan shook his head in disgust. "Don't you have any morals? You're torturing me. You know that."

"In the end, the benefits will outweigh--"

"That's crap! In the end, you damn well know I'll be dead!" He should have run when he'd had the chance. Jordan was brainwashed by the GSA; he'd never be an ally.

As the young doctor turned to leave, Brennan couldn't hide the fact that he was afraid. "Stay with me," he suddenly requested, not taking his eyes off Jordan. He didn't want him around, but it would be to his advantage. He needed to see Jordan's reaction to his torture. He needed to know if there was even the slightest chance he'd be able to manipulate him.

-----

Electrodes were attached to his chest and several monitors were set up before the last strap was tightened across Brennan's shoulders. His pulse was already racing.

Jordan gently touched his arm. "This will only last a few minutes."

His words didn't comfort Brennan in the least. He was completely strapped down. What were they possibly going to do to him?

"I want you to try to relax," Jordan continued. His readings were spiking from fear and they hadn't even started yet. "Each level will last for ten seconds, then there will be a pause for three. On each pause you'll want to take a deep breath and hold it. Okay?"

Brennan closed his eyes tightly and didn't reply.

Jordan rubbed his arm once more. "If your readings go anywhere near critical, we'll stop immediately."

The anticipation of pain was worse than the actual infliction of it. Brennan repeated that over and over to himself as he waited.

It wasn't true.

He was completely unprepared as agony flared inside him. He'd been expecting it to come from an external source. Every muscle in his body tensed and he arched.

The restraints held him, but he couldn't even jerk away from the source of the pain if he were free. It was originating deep inside of him. What started sharply behind his eyes spread instantly down into every fiber of his body. Every nerve was on fire.

Shit! He didn't know the governors were capable of this.

Ten seconds eventually slipped by, then it stopped. Brennan gasped. He could have withstood something twice as painful if he were allowed to flinch away. Being completely unable to move away from it was the worst part.

Recalling what Jordan had said, he quickly jerked another breath into his lungs and held it. But it was ripped from him much too quickly as he screamed.

He felt the internal pain mostly behind his eyes, and he began rolling his head from side to side. But it was also everywhere, coursing down his spine and branching all the way to his toes. He thrashed, wondering if it was even real or if the governor was just making him believe there was pain. It couldn't hurt this much and leave him alive if it were real.

When it stopped again, his body ached. That pain he knew was self-inflicted. It was caused from overly tensing his body. But how the hell was he supposed to relax? It was impossible.

Jordan rested a hand on his shoulder yet again, and Brennan was actually grateful. It gave him something to pull away from. He drew more air in several fast gasps, then recoiled from Jordan's touch as the pain erupted inside him once more.

This continued for a few more long minutes with Brennan continuing to shrink away from Jordan's fingers as if they were what burned him, focusing only on that touch until he could no longer even feel it. His breathing turned to hyperventilating, then Brennan thought it might have ceased entirely. And then he blacked out.

Awareness returned a few moments later. His body was sore, and he was drenched in sweat and trembling. Somebody touched his face, but he didn't have the strength to turn his head or even open his eyes.

Fingers carefully slipped two small pills into his mouth. Then a cup of water was held to his lips and the cool liquid was poured into his mouth. "Swallow," he was instructed before his throat was gently rubbed to encourage just that.

Brennan tried to obey but only choked. His throat was tight and he couldn't swallow. He stopped trying.

The strap across his chest was instantly removed and his left wrist was freed, then he was helped to roll onto his side so that he could cough. He spit out the pills then continued to choke and gasp.

"Let me know if you're going to be sick," Jordan told him while rubbing his back.

Finally managing to open his eyes, Brennan stared at him. He shook his head and the entire room spun around him from the action. He instantly froze, not allowing himself to so much as blink. Maybe he was going to be sick after all. In fact, he was somewhat surprised he hadn't thrown up already during the test. Except he didn't think he had enough energy left to vomit.

The wet hair was brushed back from his forehead in a kind gesture. "Lie back down," Jordan ordered gently.

Brennan fell back against the table and momentarily closed his eyes once more, grateful that the world was no longer set on spin cycle. He didn't feel quite so much like he was in free fall with the hard surface bracing his back. His wrist was taken by the other doctor and moved to his side so the restraint could be refastened. Brennan remained completely limp and offered no signs of fighting.

Jordan retrieved more pain pills. "When you're ready, we can try this again," he told Brennan.

He was encouraged by Jordan's natural tendency to take care of him, but at the moment he didn't think enough morphine to numb an elephant would be able to help, much less a couple little pills.

As he attempted to fall asleep, strange gloves were slipped onto his hands. He didn't really pay any attention until his governor was deactivated next. Opening his eyes, he stared questioningly at Jordan.

"Channel as much electrical current into your hands as you're able," the older doctor commanded.

Brennan hesitated. "I need my hands free." He felt like crap, but if he could get them to release his hands while his governor wasn't active, he'd risk making his move. The idea was laughable however. If he couldn't even find the strength to vomit, how the hell was he supposed to run?

The other man wasn't amused. "I'm not that gullible, Mulwray."

Relenting, Brennan attempted to form a charge. But he hardly put any effort into it. He needed to save whatever energy he had for a chance to fight. He also needed his head to stop feeling like somebody was squeezing his skull. He needed a nap...

The doctor charted something on his clipboard, then glanced up at the observation window. "That was about enough power to light a Christmas tree bulb," he commented.

Brennan stared up at the glass. He wondered how long Eckhart had been watching. Why was it even important that he was an elemental? He'd assumed he had been captured simply because he was a member of Mutant X.

"Then I suggest we find a method that doesn't require his cooperation," Eckhart's voice said through the speaker.

-----

A bolt of electricity shot into his body and Brennan squirmed a bit from the tickle. He tingled all over, but he was absorbing it perfectly. Then he felt it grow stronger.

There wasn't any pain at first, just an almost familiar static charge which increased to an odd vibration. They were forcing him to expel it... expel it or die from it when it became too much. He focussed the energy into his hands and gave Eckhart what he wanted. He released as much of it as he could, but he was unable to channel enough of the current out of his body, so the strange sensation mounted.

Brennan didn't think it hurt, although after the pain he'd been put through, his definition of what hurt had changed drastically. This he could tolerate. It wasn't his own energy, but it was something his body knew.

The warmth eventually became heat, the tingle turned into a loud hum in his ears, and he was completely wrapped in it. It was so intense, he felt like he'd explode from the fibrillations. Whenever he used his abilities, the electricity was always expelled almost instantly. He'd never been subjected to prolonged exposure before. And it was never like this. The charge was supposed to be his, something natural, part of who he was. This was completely foreign.

He knew when his body had physically reached its limited. He felt the spasms start. But he was completely zoned by the heat. The change in temperature was unexpected, and he decided it was related somehow to the Messiah Strand. Either that or this was just what outside currents felt like. The surge was incredible and still building to an even greater level. There was some amount of pain now, growing steadily worse, but it was insignificant in comparison to the raw power his body was being forced to endure.

He started to writhe as the electricity gathered in his very core. He tossed his head back, needing to breathe. He arched from the tension, feeling the power moving through him with no sufficient means of release.

He screamed between gasps. This was it, he couldn't handle anymore. They needed to stop now. Yet it continued, and he fought against the unwelcome power inside him. He couldn't let it go any longer, couldn't find any control.

He felt completely ungrounded. But this was what his body was made to do. His new mutant ability was being tested to its fullest extent. Even with his gift, however, he knew his body would be forced to shut down soon.

Yet there would be no explosion, no climactic release. He'd merely crash. The power would only drain from him when the electricity was either stopped, or when it would stop his heart and his body would die.

Reaching this precipice had forever been one of his greatest fears. His power used against him until it was too much. The force deadly.

But he wouldn't be able to actually witness the moment the line was crossed. He passed out as the spasms became convulsions.

-----

"Is he able to continue?"

Jordan tore his gaze from Brennan to stare at Eckhart. That question was getting old. "Continue? How far are you planning to take this?" He couldn't possibly want to up the current farther. Brennan had already fallen unconscious, his body still seizing.

Eckhart's gaze remained stoic, his eyes placid and emotionless. He was taking this all the way. Jordan decided to expect the worst. "I'll get a shot of epi ready and prepare for defib."

Eckhart looked to the other doctor. "No."

Jordan stared at his boss who nodded. The two of them couldn't be serious. "If you continue to raise the level, you're going to stop his heart."

"Mr. Eckhart is well aware of that," the doctor told him.

Jordan paled. So that was why Mulwray had been selected from the list of elementals. They were testing to see if his own power could be triggered by the strand at the moment of death in order to restart his heart.

Eckhart turned to face him. "Is there a problem?" He waited a moment for an answer. "Perhaps you'd like to leave?"

Finding his voice, Jordan managed to decline. "No. I'm fine."

As the electricity was raised yet again, all of Brennan's readings suddenly plunged. Jordan rushed forward. "Kill the current!" he shouted. When it was done, he immediately checked for a pulse. "He's flatlining."

Withdrawing his hand, he stepped back. The other doctor was writing something down. Eckhart was just standing there, calm and composed as always. Jordan wiped his sweaty palms on his pants. He was part of a group who'd just intentionally killed someone.

Before he had a chance to dwell on that, the monitors snapped back to life and Brennan gasped. Jordan practically jumped. He hadn't been expecting him to just revive like that.

The other doctor and Eckhart both moved to his side, yet Jordan remained frozen. He watched as an oxygen mask was slipped onto Brennan's face to aid his recovery, the test over. Then he noticed something which completely stunned him. Brennan was awake.

His eyes were searching the room for something. They came to a rest when his gaze landed on Jordan. He couldn't read his expression before it contorted with pain as the governor was reactivated. Brennan's eyes closed for a minute before opening and finding him once more.

Jordan's breath caught in his throat and he quickly spun and left the room. He couldn't face him.

-----

TBC...

Here's a challenge for those of you willing to leave reviews. Tell me what you DON'T like about my writing. I promise I don't bite.


	9. Manipulations

Finishing his message, Jesse shoved the car keys into his pocket and headed out. He'd almost managed to slip away unnoticed when Shalimar stepped into his path.  
  
"When'd you take up an interest in diving?" she asked him.  
  
He sighed. How was it that she always knew exactly what he was up to? "Are you coming with or trying to stop me?"  
  
She was standing with her hands on her hips. "Adam's going to notice that you borrowed a GPS tracker."  
  
He ran a hand through his hair in agitation. "Look, Shal, if it's more than just their rings down there, I need to know!"  
  
"Adam wouldn't--" she started but was instantly cut off.  
  
"Adam is busy identifying corpses!" Jesse snapped at her. "Maybe finding those rings will give us some clue as to what's really going on. Either way, it will let us stop checking morgues."  
  
"I don't believe they're dead," Adam said from behind him. "At least not yet. You're right; there is something going on."  
  
Jesse spun to face him. "How do you know?"  
  
"I know Mason," was the simple reply.  
  
That didn't improve matters any. "Thanks, I feel much better now being reminded that you used to be in bed in with the bad guys," Jesse retorted sarcastically.  
  
Shalimar screwed up her face in disgust. "Yuck, that's a lovely mental picture, Jess."  
  
Adam merely ignored the comment. "If he'd killed them, we'd know by now," he said, certain of that fact. "No, he took them for a reason, and he's just making sure we're too distracted to interfere."  
  
-----  
  
Emma stared down at her fresh clothes. Drawstring pants and a T-shirt. Both white... Blank. Like her mind. Without her gift, she was both blind and deaf. Empty.  
  
She poked at the food on her plate then looked at the GS agent who sat across from her, ready to inflict pain if she tried to run. Not that she could ever leave without Brennan. "Why haven't I been podded?" she asked.  
  
"Don't worry, sweetheart, you will be." He smiled a repulsive grin at her, almost more of a snarl. "When they're done dissecting your playmate, it'll be your turn to go to sleep."  
  
She shivered at the way he referred to Brennan, not even noticing what he'd said about her own fate. "What are they doing to him?" Her voice shook from nervousness. Did she even want to know?  
  
His smile broadened. "Everything. Ya know, maybe that's why you're being kept around. Sooner or later, they're gonna want to test him for sexual side effects." He winked at her.  
  
Not caring about the rest of her meal, she grabbed her tray and dumped the remainder of her food as she smashed him across the side of his head with it.  
  
-----  
  
Brennan was staring up at the ceiling when he heard somebody enter. He made no attempt to see who it was. Instead he just closed his eyes and wished them away. He felt terrible.  
  
A needle was stuck into his arm, and he flinched. "You're still awake," Jordan's voice commented and Brennan finally looked at him.  
  
He set down the vile of blood he'd just drawn. His eyes met Brennan's for a lingering moment.  
  
The feeling of being nauseous was growing more intense and Brennan thought he was going to be sick. Jordan wiped his damp hair back from his face and he forced himself to not pull away from the touch. He moaned softly.  
  
"It will get easier after you've completed the treatments," Jordan told him.  
  
Brennan felt like he was going to die. He suspected he had just died. He let himself tremble. Jordan was the only person with him, so there was no point in being brave. You didn't feel sympathy toward the strong. The need to protect was reserved for the weak. "Don't let them do this..."  
  
Jordan began to caress his face. "This research will help others."  
  
"Not true..." Brennan mumbled, needing to get him to switch sides. He weakly let his eyes slip shut.  
  
"You need to have a little faith that this is for the best," Jordan said, almost trying to convince himself as well as Brennan. "Mr. Eckhart is a good man. If you knew him under different circumstances, you'd agree."  
  
Opening his eyes, Brennan looked at the young man. "Under other circumstances, you and I could have been friends," he remarked, trying to play him.  
  
"Maybe more than friends," Jordan commented.  
  
That confirmed it. The kid was definitely in the closet. Brennan tried not to vomit. He disguised his repulsion at the discovery of where Jordan's interests lay with a wince of pain. "Can I rest here awhile longer," he requested, "before I'm taken back to my cell. I don't think I can stand." That part at least was true. He didn't want Emma seeing him in this condition.  
  
Jordan nodded, stroking his face again. "Of course."  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
Sorry for the short part, but I need to stop and go to bed. Tomorrow, I'll write some nice long angst for you all. 


	10. Lines

When Brennan was eventually returned to Emma, he had difficulty forcing himself to even look at her. He wanted to pretend everything was fine, but he hadn't been able to fall asleep in the lab, so there was still a lot of pain.  
  
"So how was your day?" he asked as casually as possible, attempting to act normal.  
  
"Well, I started a tiny brawl. Broke one guy's nose." She gazed at him, worried for a reason she couldn't figure out. "You?"  
  
"It wasn't as bad this time," he lied before reaching to place his hand on the wall to help hold him up. The muscles in his arm quivered. He gave her a small smile. "I'm proud of you, by the way. Getting into a fight was stupid, but you don't look hurt. You're not, are you?"  
  
"No, I'm not." She reached out to help support him. "It got stopped pretty fast. But you should see the other guy."  
  
His smile broadened. "That's my girl."  
  
Then he leaned back against the wall and winced. "Brennan?" she asked nervously.  
  
He waved her off. "I'm just worn out. It's no big deal."  
  
She seemed to sense the tears behind his eyes that he was desperately trying to hold back. He was also trying to keep himself from shaking. He refused to fall apart in front of her. He glanced at the camera. Eckhart wouldn't see his breakdown either. Nobody else was going to see him cry.  
  
As Emma softly touched his face, he pulled away and then rushed to the bathroom. Dropping to his knees in front of the toilet, he retched. Not having anything in his stomach to throw up, he continue to dry heave, his body wanting to rid itself of whatever was causing the pain.  
  
He shuddered as an aftershock from the electricity coursed through him. Emma had apparently followed him because she was now rubbing his back in small circles. He knew she'd feel the vibrations in his body and shrugged her off, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. He wondered how much longer it would be before he stopped experiencing the involuntary muscle spasms.  
  
"Brennan, are you sick?" Emma asked, trying to feel his forehead for signs of fever. He quickly drew back once more.  
  
"No." He rubbed his temples in an attempt to ease the throbbing behind his eyes. There were no physical signs on his body this time, so he was able to lie. "Last few days just caught up with me for a second, that's all."  
  
She felt herself want to cry. "Please don't lie to me."  
  
He looked over at her before averting his gaze and staring at the wall. "Just don't touch me right now, okay?"  
  
Letting her hand drop to her side, she fought back the steadily growing feeling of dread. "What's wrong with you?"  
  
"How the hell should I know?" he snapped at her, catching her eyes for a fraction of a second and praying she hadn't seen his fear. "That would require me knowing what I am."  
  
This time, she did touch him. Very gently, she placed her hand on his and willed him not to pull away from her. She kept looking at him with compassion. "You're you."  
  
"Am I?" He blinked up at her, finally lifting his head. "I have never considered my gift as something that makes me feel out of place. I wasn't normal, but I wasn't a freak either. I was just me, different but me, and I could accept that. But this... I don't even think we bleed the same blood anymore. If we do, then I should be dead. I'm afraid of myself. Afraid I might be losing myself. You have no idea how much that terrifies me."  
  
She moved until she was sitting by side and leaned her head on his shoulder, all the while still holding his hand, refusing to let go. "You want to know who you are?" she asked. "That's easy. You're Brennan Mulwray. You're a member of Mutant X. You're loyal. You like reading poetry and have a very odd fashion sense that although strange I still find endearing. You're a closet romantic, but you'd never admit to it. You consider Jesse to be a brother, and Shalimar is your family also but you lose the ability to form coherent sentences whenever she wears something revealing--"  
  
Brennan started to object to that, but she continued anyway, not letting him get a word in edgewise. "And you're my best friend, so even if you have doubts about losing yourself, trust that I don't. I know you. And I will always love you. No matter what."  
  
Not knowing what to say to that, he merely pulled her into his arms. "I don't know what I'd do without you, Em. You're keeping me sane."  
  
She held onto him for a long time until she felt the slight fibrillation course through him. For a moment, she thought it might have been a held- back sob, but he tightened his grip on her and she knew it had been accompanied by pain.  
  
Slowly, she eased back from him. "Come on, you need to get some sleep," she told him gently.  
  
He shook his head. "No."  
  
"What? Brennan, if you don't sleep, you're not going to feel better." She gave his hand a small tug, urging him to come with her.  
  
He didn't budge. "I know. This has to stop, Em. So, the way I figure it, if I quit sleeping, hopefully I'll become weak enough that Eckhart won't be able to continue his tests."  
  
She stared deeply at him, her expression very serious. "How far has he taken this?" When Brennan just turned away, she grabbed his shoulder. "Tell me!"  
  
"I can't!" he shouted back. Couldn't she see he was trying to protect her? Why did she insist on knowing the details? He fell silent. There were things he could never let her know.  
  
Eckhart had taken this beyond reason. He'd crossed a line when he'd actually killed him.  
  
-----  
  
Adam paced back and forth several times, then looked to Shalimar and Jesse. "Okay, let's go over this again. What do we know?"  
  
Shalimar sighed. "We know the rings were a decoy to--"  
  
"Just stop it," Jesse cut in, standing up. "We can go over things a thousand times. We still won't know where they are."  
  
"Alright," Adam said, seeing the young man's agitation. "We don't know where Emma and Brennan are. So we change our strategy. We stop searching for them... and try to find Eckhart."  
  
-----  
  
"Penny for them," Emma offered as they lay awake. Brennan had simply turned his back to the camera and was still refusing to sleep.  
  
Her voice interrupted his thoughts. "Huh?"  
  
"You're a thousand miles away," she commented softly. "Wanna tell me what's on your mind?"  
  
He sighed. "You ever wonder why some things happen the way they do?"  
  
"You mean like our current situation?" she asked, not certain if he was talking about now or just in general.  
  
He propped himself up on his elbow and stared intently at her. "Do you trust Adam? I mean, really trust him, with your life?"  
  
"Yeah, of course I do," she replied without hesitation. "What brought this up?"  
  
Shaking his head, he sighed again. "Nothing."  
  
"I do believe that he'll find us." She watched him carefully. He was acting odd and still looked somewhat pained, and she wondered if he really was getting sick, although she figured that would be impossible now.  
  
Brennan rested his back against the floor once more and gazed at the white ceiling. "He asked Shal to wash the cars, Jesse to upgrade one of the computers, and you to help in the lab. It was my job bring the new mutant into the underground. Alone."  
  
She thought she could see where this was going now. "If I hadn't decided to take a break and tag along with you, I wouldn't be here," she summarized. "Our lives change with every choice we make, Brennan. That's just the way things are."  
  
"Did you tell anyone you were coming with me?" he asked next, still very serious.  
  
"They know we're together," she replied. "I left a note."  
  
Sitting up, he put his face in his hands. "So nobody knew 'til after the fact." He slammed his fist against the wall. "He set me up!"  
  
Emma sat also, confused once more. "You think the new mutant sold us out to the GSA?"  
  
"Don't you get it, Em," he asked, grabbing her hands. "We never saw anybody but a whole shit-load of Eckhart's goons. They were waiting for me. Specifically for me. And they knew I'd be there."  
  
She suddenly pulled back. He wasn't accusing the new mutant. Brennan was angry at the one person who'd had enough control to send only him. "You think Adam did this?" She couldn't believe it.  
  
His expression was flat. "How else would they have known?" he said simply.  
  
Shifting so that she was on her knees right next to him, she cupped his face in her palm. "Because you always go. Because of coincidence. Because the ambush would have been enough to take out all of us. Because life sucks sometimes." She made him look at her. "But not because Adam betrayed you. Not ever."  
  
He just shook his head. His heart believed Adam couldn't have done this, yet logic argued otherwise. He sighed. "I hope to God you're right, Emma."  
  
-----  
  
When they came for him again, Emma fought. She begged them not to take him. Brennan could hardly even walk.  
  
But it was pointless. One of the guards merely set off her governor and she crumpled to the floor. Throughout all this, Brennan didn't even lift a finger to resist as his hands were roughly cuffed behind his back.  
  
On legs that felt like they could hardly support his weight, Brennan stood with the men he knew would hurt him. He'd play it safe one last time. This was his final shot.  
  
"I'm sorry, Emma." He stared intently at her. "I am so sorry."  
  
As the door was closed behind them, he looked to his guard. He was ready to place all his cards on the table. "I need to speak with Eckhart."  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
BTW, you slashers have turned my inbox into a gutter, but your comments are definitely the most amusing, so um... thanks, I guess. 


	11. Deals

"What is it?" Eckhart kept his back to Brennan as he spoke, a sign of his overconfidence. He stared through the window of his office that was almost identical to the one at Genomex.  
  
Brennan waited for him to turn around. "I haven't fought you. I've withheld my side of our deal, and I'll continue to do so. But I want your word on something. When this is over, you'll let Emma go."  
  
Sitting, Eckhart looked across his desk at him. "Why should I do that?"  
  
"Because I'm offering you my full cooperation, and my life." He knew the experiments were going to be concluded by his permanent death. There was no escaping that. The only thing he didn't know was how long it would take. But he'd stopped sleeping, so it would happen. The only problem was that he was slowly losing his mind the further this was prolonged, and he didn't want Emma forced to witness that. "The next time I die, you set her free."  
  
"I'll give it careful consideration."  
  
That wasn't good enough. "I need your answer now."  
  
Eckhart remained sitting and kept his tone calm. "You're not in a position to make demands."  
  
Matching his air of composure, Brennan replied, "Then we have no deal, and I will fight you."  
  
Eckhart slowly stood. "I can have the girl killed."  
  
"You'll do as you will." Brennan made certain that he showed no emotion. For Emma's sake, she couldn't be seen as his weakness. "You've made it clear I have no power. I won't let her be used against me any longer."  
  
With a slight incline of his head, Eckhart pressed a button on his desk which opened his office door. "Very well."  
  
Brennan's handler took a step forward and Brennan walked to take his place at the man's side. His movements held a sure confidence despite the fact that his hands were bound. He looked once more to Eckhart. "You will regret this." Not a threat, a promise.  
  
"As will you, Mr. Mulwray."  
  
-----  
  
"How old are you?" Brennan asked as his health was checked, curious if Jordan was as young as he looked.  
  
"Nineteen," was the reply. "But I shouldn't be talking to you like this."  
  
Damn. He couldn't start acting detached now. "All I did was ask your age," Brennan said, trying not to panic. "Where's the harm in that?"  
  
Jordan sighed. "It's under other circumstances that we could be friends. Not under these."  
  
"Why?" Brennan asked, keeping him talking. The rest of Mutant X had yet to mount a rescue, and Eckhart had made it perfectly clear that he would never let Emma go. Their only hope rested with Jordan. "Because you're not allowed to fraternize with the freaks? What are you afraid of?"  
  
Jordan glared at him. "We're on opposite sides, Mulwray. In case you'd forgotten, you're a member of Mutant X."  
  
He hadn't forgotten. "I'm not sure I even trust Adam any longer," Brennan said quietly, staring at his hands and noting the absence of his ring. "He should have gotten me out of here by now."  
  
Looking back to Jordan, Brennan felt as though he'd just sworn off his loyalty to Mutant X. "You need to question things as well," he told Jordan. "You've got your whole life ahead of you. You need to decide where you stand."  
  
Jordan didn't reply, and Brennan closed his eyes, feeling ashamed. Eckhart wasn't the only one crossing lines. He was playing a dangerous game himself.  
  
-----  
  
After he was given another injection, Brennan was left alone with Jordan once more. He knew the young doctor was recording his reaction to the drug. Brennan didn't much mind it anymore. The rush made him feel good.  
  
He had to be getting close to the end of these injections. He already wondered if he'd crossed the point of no return. He looked to Jordan. "You can stop this."  
  
"I don't have that kind of authority," was the simple reply.  
  
Brennan fidgeted against his restraints. The next test would be soon. "Jordan, please..."  
  
He gave Brennan an empathetic look. "I can give you something to help you relax, but that's all."  
  
"I don't want to relax. I want to stop being treated like I'm not a person!" He stared deeply at Jordan, desperately needing him to understand. "I'm the same as you."  
  
Jordan retrieved a syringe and Brennan tried to pull his arm away but was held in place by the restraints. "It's a light sedative," Jordan explained. "It will help."  
  
Brennan yanked his arm again and kept Jordan from being able to find a vein. Sedatives were the last thing he wanted. "Don't drug me."  
  
Jordan gave up and tossed the syringe in the trash. "You are too god-damn stubborn, Mulwray!"  
  
"Fuck you!" Brennan tossed back before being able to think better of his reaction. All Jordan was willing to do was keep combating his pain with chemicals. But Brennan wanted it to stop!  
  
Jordan gave him a spiteful glare before eventually saying, "They want you to struggle, but it will be better for you if you don't fight." He snapped off his gloves and slung them in the general direction of the trash.  
  
As his handler entered, Brennan turned back to Jordan, still regarding him angrily. "What's going to happen to me?" he asked concerning the warning.  
  
Jordan just turned away as Brennan was released from the chair and forced to stand so his hands could be cuffed again behind his back. The metal slipped around one wrist, but before the second one could be locked, he spun, instantly changing position so he could grab his handler's wrist.  
  
If you could control the wrist, you gained control over the arm. Pushing hard against the man's palm and bending it painfully back, Brennan then slid his other hand to the elbow. The arm was his. He shifted his weight in order to toss his handler to the floor.  
  
At that moment, another guard entered through the door. When Brennan moved, his ankle was grabbed by his handler. Placing all his weight on the captured limb, he used his other leg to kick over the trash. Bending, he fist slammed the metal of his handcuffs into his handler's face, then he picked up the syringe Jordan had discarded and tossed it at the man who'd just entered. It caught him directly in the throat.  
  
Breaking free of his handler, he rolled over the table then lunged for the other man. He'd pulled the syringe out of his neck and made a move to punch Brennan. The strike was swiftly blocked. Noticing that the guard had left his side exposed, Brennan kicked forward, placing his foot on the man's stomach then continuing to step down hard.  
  
When he cried out, the ball of Brennan's palm smashed into his face, breaking his nose with a martial arts move that could have potentially killed him. Adam had once told him to never enter a fight he couldn't end in thirty seconds. Right now, he was using moves that would assure just that. His only objective was to win.  
  
The room was now clear except for Jordan, and it was simple for Brennan to get his arm pinned behind his back before he even saw the advance coming. "Who's side are you on?"  
  
Jordan didn't answer.  
  
Brennan took a deep breath. Right. Jordan was one of the bad guys. Since he controlled the young man's arm, Brennan had control over Jordan's entire balance. He shoved him toward the door, yet stopped before opening it.  
  
Brennan leaned in close to Jordan's ear. "Look after Emma for me," was all he said before finally moving them into the hall and into the midst of a dozen guards. Brennan had expected as much. Eckhart would have been prepared after their little talk.  
  
Moving his arm around Jordan's neck, he squeezed, blocking his airway. "Go to sleep," he instructed softly before letting Jordan drop limply. Then he raised his hands and placed them behind his head in surrender.  
  
Several punches landed upon him regardless, and he was thankful he hadn't tried to use Jordan as a shield. He would have merely been taken out in order for them to get to Brennan.  
  
His handler had come around from the blow at this point and finished securing Brennan's hands. He turned to spot the hall camera. Eckhart would be watching. He mouthed "round one" before being shoved in the back and forced to walk.  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
A few comments to those who've left feedback. First off, stop reading ahead! I already have part of the next chapter written in which Emma becomes part of the test, and also Brennan gets to get wet. Then later I have some major angst which MagnusXXN already got a preview of (want some more?). So no reading my mind or I'll have to take drastic measures to shake things up. I don't want to be accused of being predictable.  
  
Or, if you can still predict me (psionics are real!!), at least leave your addy with your review so I can send you what I've got and get your comments before posting it.  
  
For those playing the "How Many Times Has Brennan Died?" game, the answer is only once so far. During his other close call, he only stopped breathing. There's always the case to be argued that he also died when he had his initial reaction to the strand and when he was stabbed, but I never actually said so, and I'd have made a bigger deal out of it if he had.  
  
Adam's involvement? I thought that was obvious. If not, um okay, cool. Mystery is good. Yeah, I know, I'm evil. But you'll figure it out soon enough.  
  
Slashers, will you kindly stop chanting gutter? You're making it hard for me to concentrate. Although your comments are a riot. I've never laughed so hard. You guys are filthy, but definitely funny. However, I'd like to think I'm incorruptible. I'm a shipper, damn it!  
  
Anything left that I didn't respond to? Let me know. 


	12. Devils

Leaning against the blank wall in her empty room, Emma was trying anything she could think of to distract her thoughts from dwelling on Brennan. Her white surroundings didn't really help matters.  
  
She kicked the wall, leaving a small dent. "Seventeen chips in the paint on the wall, seventeen chips in the paint... If anyone tries to repaint this wall, then I'll likely have to kill them all..."  
  
Kicking the hideously boring wall again, she continued her alteration of Ninety-nine Bottles of Beer on the Wall. "Nineteen frelling chips in the paint on the wall, nineteen frelling chips... And Farscape marathons aren't helping my vocabulary at all, I can actually feel my brain getting small..."  
  
"Apparently, considering you skipped eighteen," commented Eckhart who was now standing in her doorway.  
  
Pissed-off, Emma slammed her foot into the wall once more. Ouch, her heel was going to throb for a week. "Better?" she asked through gritted teeth.  
  
He frowned. "Charming. Anyway, seeing as how Mr. Mulwray has broken our arrangement, I am no longer obligated to mollycoddle you. Consider yourself in play."  
  
With that, he left and a guard entered. She was then escorted to one of the labs.  
  
-----  
  
"I'll need you to take off all your clothes and then lie down," she was instructed after her handcuffs were removed.  
  
Emma crossed her arms stubbornly over her chest. "I will not."  
  
The young doctor sighed. "Please."  
  
"Bite me," Emma retorted.  
  
"I'd rather not have to ask the guard to come back and do it for you." He fixed her with an annoyed stare.  
  
She glared right back.  
  
"Fine," he huffed, fetching a sheet. He held it up and averted his gaze. "And don't even think of trying any of that Kung Fu crap on me while I'm not looking."  
  
Frustrated, Emma quickly stripped then grabbed the offered sheet and wrapped it around herself. As she finished, he turned back toward her and she quickly slapped him. "You looked."  
  
He visibly fumed before attempting to control his temper. "You're infuriating!" He motioned to the table. "Now if you don't mind..."  
  
Emma awkwardly hopped up onto the table.  
  
The young man gave her an appreciative look. "Thank you," he said. "I think we've gotten off on the wrong foot here. My name's Jordan Mehler."  
  
"Typical," Emma remarked. "First get the girl naked and then worry about introductions."  
  
Jordan groaned. "I thought we could attempt being civil. Seeing as that isn't the case, can you just set aside the sheet for two seconds, I can run this damn scan, you can return to your quaint little room and resume moping, and if I'm lucky, I can repress the memory of this entire experience!"  
  
"If you want this sheet, you're gonna have to pry it out of my cold, dead hands."  
  
"That is most definitely NOT a problem!" he snapped at her. "God, you're every bit the pain in the ass that Mulwray is!"  
  
She gave him a sweet smile. "Thank you."  
  
"That wasn't a compliment!" He grabbed one of her arms and locked her wrist in the restraint.  
  
Beyond upset, Emma swung her leg up and kicked him across the side of his face. Luckily for him, her angle and modesty hadn't allowed nearly as hard of an impact as she would have liked. He also had the bonus of her not wearing shoes.  
  
Jordan rubbed his cheek. "What the hell?" He stared at her, deciding he'd better find a compromise if he didn't want to be rendered unconscious twice in one day. "How about no restraints and I let you lie on your stomach?"  
  
Emma considered that for a moment. She knew she'd eventually be forced no matter how much she protested. "I guess that's acceptable," she mumbled.  
  
Jordan just rolled his eyes. What was it about Mutant Xers?  
  
-----  
  
After the guards had enjoyed another round of the "Beat Brennan to a Bloody Pulp" game, they finally seemed to decide to get on with things. Brennan wasn't sure if he should be grateful for that or not.  
  
He walked willingly beside his handler, knowing it would be pointless to fight. He couldn't make another move until he was certain he could get Emma out. He feared his past cooperation had been the only thing keeping her out of a stasis pod.  
  
If something happened to him during this test, she'd be left to fend for herself. So he needed to obey them now, not give Eckhart more reason to be angry with him. He'd get another chance to fight later. And that one would be thoroughly planned.  
  
So he remained submissive for the moment as he was led to an unfamiliar room and escorted inside. Several people were there waiting, including Eckhart. Brennan could feel his heart rate jump. Whatever they had planned most likely wasn't going to be very pleasant for him.  
  
Inspecting his surroundings, Brennan made note that part of the floor was sunken. With another shove to his back, he was forced down the steps. There were several indentations in the floor, each containing a bolted down restraint.  
  
"Lie down," he was instructed.  
  
Unnerved by the growing feeling of dread, Brennan waited too long before obeying. His sub-dermal governor was activated, sending a strong jolt pain through him that sent him to his knees. He was roughly shoved the rest of the way down, then his restraints were switched again so that he was lying on his back with his hands trapped at his sides. His ankles were secured next, followed by a strap across his chest. The final strap wasn't tight, merely serving to keep him from being able to sit up.  
  
His handler pushed his head to the side and deactivated his governor. Just as Brennan prepared to shock the crap out of him, water rushed from the walls of the sunken area, quickly filling the indentations and submerging his hands.  
  
He turned his head to see if he could spot Eckhart. He'd briefly forgotten he had an audience. Whatever came next, they wanted him wet and helpless. He'd be at his weakest.  
  
Leaving his side, his handler joined the others at the top of the steps. Brennan twisted to be able to watch what was going on. The water was no longer gushing over him, yet it hadn't stopped either. He was fast getting a very bad feeling.  
  
"Stop when the level is just high enough for him to aspirate the water," Eckhart instructed the other nameless man. "Take him to lab 2 when it's over."  
  
With that, Eckhart exited. And Brennan began fighting. He could endure beatings or electricity, but water... Water was not something he was prepared to deal with. He already felt tired and vulnerable.  
  
He tugged fiercely at his restraints, none of them giving an inch. He tried again, tossing his full weight against the binds, yet he didn't have enough range of motion for his efforts to matter.  
  
Blind panic started to set in, and Brennan struggled to stay calm. He had to think of a way out of this. The water was still slowly rising, and soon it would completely cover him.  
  
Eckhart wanted him to drown.  
  
-----  
  
"I just got off the line with a lovely young lady who works for Genomex," Jesse said as he found Shalimar and Adam. "Apparently Eckhart is supposed be on vacation."  
  
That could definitely be useful. "Where'd he go?" Adam inquired.  
  
"Don't know," Jesse replied. "But as far as I can tell, he never left."  
  
"He's right under our nose, I just know it," Shalimar said. She could practically feel him. Her skin crawled at the thought.  
  
Adam nodded. "Jesse, I need you to check out all the large businesses in the area. One of them has to be a front."  
  
"You think Eckhart has another company other than Genomex?" Shalimar asked. "Why wouldn't we know about it?"  
  
"I think the entire point is us not knowing about it," Jesse said. "But I already looked them all up. Other than your standard banking discrepancies, they're all clean."  
  
This couldn't be another dead end. "They can't all be legit," Shalimar protested. "What if we do this the old fashioned way and start busting into every place on the list?"  
  
Jesse just closed his eyes for a moment. "I've narrowed it down to 37 possibilities. Now, the odds of us breaking into all of them in a reasonable amount of time without being arrested are actually pretty good. If we had a career criminal and a psionic with us."  
  
Shalimar started pacing. "Well, we don't!"  
  
Adam attempted to calm her down and she flashed her eyes at him. "We'll come up with another plan," he told her.  
  
"Okay," she shot back. "Let's hear this great plan. What's the genius way to go about saving our friends?"  
  
Sitting down, Adam watched her resume her cat-like stalking back and forth. He understood how she felt, but getting angry wasn't helping. "I don't know. Maybe we should all take a break and try to clear our heads."  
  
"And waste some more time?" She was not about to stop searching while Brennan and Emma were still out there somewhere. Likely somewhere nearby. "The longer we wait, the more chance there is of Eckhart already having killed them!"  
  
"I refuse to believe that they're dead!" Jesse broke in. Those were his friends! He stared at Shalimar.  
  
"I'm sorry, Jess," she apologized. "I'm just getting a bit restless."  
  
Agreeing, Adam stood and placed his hand on her arm. They all felt the need to act. "I'm not saying we give up on them," he told her. "I'm just saying... I don't know."  
  
-----  
  
The water was being stained red with his blood, but Brennan didn't care. He continued jerking frantically at his binds, tearing the skin of his wrists and ankles. The restraints were tight and bit more deeply into his flesh every time he yanked against them. He wasn't going to be able to break free.  
  
Damn it! He began arching his back, straining the strap across his chest. It was leather, not metal, so there was the smallest amount of give. If he could force it loose, he'd be able to sit, and that would buy him time.  
  
Water swept over his face and he lifted his head and gasped as it stung his eyes. It was no use. It would take several hours to work the strap free. He kept his head up and sucked in another breath. He needed help.  
  
Jordan wasn't among his spectators. None of Eckhart's other men would feel even a trace of sympathy toward him. Oh god... And all Jordan had done was warn him not to struggle. Stupid little piece of shit. How the hell was he not supposed to struggle? They were trying to kill him!  
  
And Eckhart hadn't agreed to his deal. Emma couldn't be left with him! He didn't want to die!  
  
No, he told himself, he wasn't going to die. He collapsed back down against the floor and rested for a second before forcing himself up once more. His abdomen muscles already ached as though he'd done a thousand sit- ups, but he had to keep pressing up against that strap if he wanted air.  
  
He told himself to take Jordan's advice. If he drowned, he'd probably wake up from it. Eckhart wasn't done with him yet. There were many other forms of torture he hadn't inflicted upon him yet.  
  
Brennan let himself sink one more time. His fight was almost gone. He could just allow himself to die now. What use was prolonging it? He *was* going to wake up again. He had to.  
  
And if he didn't, at least Eckhart's experiment would be over. He wouldn't be hurt any more. Eckhart wouldn't have him.  
  
He'd only have Emma.  
  
NO! Struggling to get his head above the surface, he gasped again. This time, he inhaled mostly water. Salt water? Choking, he fought harder, managing to get another breath. It seemed like the water had stopped rising, staying at a level that caused him to breathe it in along with the air, slowly filling his lungs. It was sick that Eckhart wanted this to be as bad as possible.  
  
Brennan's mind reached out for Emma, but he couldn't find her. With her governor still on, she'd have no idea what was happening to him. If this was it, then he was dying alone.  
  
He cried, and his tears mixed with the water. His neck hurt from straining it. He dropped back under and used the restraints on his wrists to pull himself with. If he could somehow slip under the strap...  
  
Eventually feeling the burn of his lungs needing another breath, he gave up and resigned himself to the same struggle as before. He breathed in more air, and more water. Even without the strap over his chest, he would have only had a few minutes longer. What good was that?  
  
If Adam had failed to rescue him in however many days he'd been here, what were the odds of him showing up now? Maybe he had betrayed him.  
  
"ADAM..." he cried out futilely. "Where are you?"  
  
He swallowed more water, choking profusely. It was now impossible to reach any more air. The level slid up a fraction too high, covering him with Adam's name on his lips.  
  
Brennan didn't blame him, though. He couldn't. And even if it were true, Adam might not have been there for him, might have even willingly set him up and turned him over to the GSA, but he could still save Emma. She was never supposed to have been a part of this. Adam wouldn't allow her to be harmed. That was all that mattered now.  
  
Because Brennan wouldn't be there to protect her.  
  
Letting himself go limp, he rested his body, going weightless as the water completely surrounded him. He closed his eyes and tried to calm his thoughts. He couldn't hold his breath any longer, and there was no more air. It was time to face his fears.  
  
Finally, he inhaled, first feeling the water sting his nostrils and then rush into his mouth. He didn't merely swallow the water, he breathed it into his lungs. It was over.  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
Sorry for stopping in such a bad spot. I'll try to continue soon. Prepare yourselves for lots of angst in the chapters ahead.  
  
I e-mailed quite a few people who left reviews, but Hotmail was acting weird, so I'm not sure anything was actually sent. So, if you wanted to read some of the future scenes that I already have written, e-mail me and let me know which parts you want. I'd love to hear your comments.  
  
I also still need a beta-reader!  
  
Oh, and somebody asked how long this story is going to be. Honestly, I don't know. But I probably have another half dozen chapters before I reach Part Two. 


	13. Deaths

First off, HUGE thanks to my new beta-readers, Vixen and Ice Queen. All typos can now be blamed entirely on them. *evil grin* Okay fine, I'm only kidding. Mistakes are still mine. Besides, I didn't have a chance to put in all their suggestions for this chapter since it's midterms and I didn't want to keep you all waiting forever. But I will from now on.  
  
And now, on with the story...  
  
-----  
  
The man who Brennan knew only as his handler waded into the water when Brennan quit moving. He made his way to the young man's side and stared down at him. Suspecting a last effort to survive, he placed his foot on Brennan's chest and pressed down.  
  
Any remaining air was forced from Brennan's lungs, and he jerked a few times as he was held down. His handler waited, knowing Brennan didn't have any strength left. He quieted again soon, becoming absolutely still.  
  
The man placed a firm kick to his side, receiving no response. "Drain it," he called to the supervising doctor.  
  
As the water rushed out, he knelt beside the still form. There was no sign of breathing. He placed his hand to Brennan's throat and checked for a pulse. It beat faintly beneath his fingers. Damn, the kid was a fighter right to the end.  
  
He waited for the heartbeat to cease, then looked up once more. "Tell Eckhart he's dead."  
  
-----  
  
A feeling of unease crept over Emma. Something wasn't right. She felt like someone had called out her name. She could feel echoes of it being shouted along with Adam's. She stopped pacing and walked to the door of her cell, pounding on it.  
  
"I need to talk to somebody!" she yelled, feeling herself shiver. Eckhart had told her that Brennan had broken their deal. She prayed he hadn't done something to him as punishment. Eventually, her door was opened. She stared at the GS agent without really seeing him; her mind was too distracted. "Where's Brennan?"  
  
"Mr. Mulwray didn't survive the last stage of tests," he informed her, his tone lacking any trace of compassion.  
  
She shook her head. He was lying. It couldn't be true! Suddenly slamming herself into the bastard, she shoved her way past him and into the hall, bolting as fast as her legs would carry her.  
  
Training all her senses on Brennan, she ran. She had no idea which way to go. She couldn't feel him. Even with a governor on, this wasn't right. She should have felt something. She could always tell when he entered a room without using her powers. It was that feeling which was absent. She might as well have been blind.  
  
Ripping a stupid "you are here" map from the wall, she headed for the labs. There was an echo of another set of footfalls pounding against the floor behind hers, alerting her that she was being pursued. This damn building was massive.  
  
Finally, she saw a flock of doctors through one of the large glass windows. Inside that lab, she also spotted Eckhart. They were all gathered around something... someone.  
  
She took another step and her foot slipped. She stared down at the drops of water. At a certain angle, the lights reflected an entire trail of small pools. Emma's throat clenched up as she lifted her eyes, very scared of what she might see.  
  
The person who was blocking her view moved, and she caught a glimpse of Brennan lying on a table, his shirt being stripped off so that electrodes could be attached to his chest. Matching ones had already been placed on his temples. Monitors were also being hooked up.  
  
Her hand instantly reached out and touched the glass to support herself as her legs threatened to buckle beneath her. With difficulty, she made herself to walk into that room.  
  
Emma finally understood what people meant when they said that their blood ran cold. She could have sworn her heart stopped pumping entirely. Brennan's body was soaked with water, and he was pale. Her blood seemed to change direction and run backwards through her veins. She forced herself to breathe.  
  
She pushed her way closer, not even noticing the person who grabbed her arm. Brennan was lying perfectly still. Why wasn't he moving?  
  
She wanted to scream at somebody to dry him off, but her voice was gone. Brennan was weak when he was wet. He'd heal faster if they'd just dry away the water. Then he'd wake up.  
  
Dear God, he had to wake up...  
  
This had to be a nightmare, for it couldn't be real. It wasn't her best friend who was lying on that table. This wasn't happening. It wasn't possible!  
  
His lips were tinged blue, and there was no rise and fall of his chest to signify breathing. He was obviously dead, the monitor behind him flatlining. "What the hell have you done to him?!" she yelled at Eckhart as someone tried to drag her away. Her words came out whispered.  
  
Flailing, she began to kick wildly at whoever held her. Her only focus was Eckhart. If she was let go, she'd kill him. She'd kill him because he'd killed Brennan. She knew she'd become hysterical as she continued to scream at him, managing to raise her volume to a shout of rage, sorrow, and fear.  
  
He'd taken Brennan away from her. She couldn't have lost him.  
  
A hand was placed over her mouth and she quit trying to scream, merely sobbing instead. Eckhart was acting as though she wasn't even there. None of them cared. They were all a bunch of murderers!  
  
As she was none-too-gently escorted out, she kept listening to the conversation in that room. According to the doctor that seemed to be in charge, Brennan was registering as completely brain dead.  
  
They really had lost him...  
  
At that, Emma stopped kicking and simply let herself go limp with a small whimper. Her world crumbled around her. If that were true, there was no point in fighting.  
  
-----  
  
"There's no sign of any brain activity," the doctor commented to Eckhart. "In my opinion, it's doubtful he'll revive."  
  
Jordan watched in shock before intruding on the conversation. "Let's get a crash cart in here and try defib," he suggested, his mouth oddly dry. He was completely torn as to how he was supposed to feel.  
  
"That would invalidate the experiment," Eckhart stated calmly.  
  
Jordan had listened to enough of this crap. He decided to be more bold. "It could be enough to save his life!"  
  
Eckhart's tone remained the same. "His life is worthless to me if this fails."  
  
Jordan shook his head. They might be scientists, but he was foremost a doctor. He was compelled to act. "So save him now, and once the changes to his DNA are complete, try again. The Messiah Strand will work. Trust me!"  
  
The room was silent as he waited for a reply. Every sound seemed to single itself out as though it were the only one. The steady beep of the monitor which was displaying a straight line, the hum of the lights, the rumble of the air conditioner kicking on - or was it the heat - his own heartbeat, the breathing of the other men in the room... Everything was so sharp, yet no sound came from Brennan.  
  
The other doctor checked his watch, and Jordan could swear he heard it ticking. Brennan had been down well past the five-minute mark. "I think we should call it."  
  
Not ready to admit defeat, Jordan began scrambling for supplies. "Let's hook up an IV, try an epi push, and start CPR," he recited, trying desperately to recall his studies. He'd never been present during an actual code before if he didn't count Brennan's last return from near death.  
  
Deciding to skip setting up an IV line because it would be too time- consuming, he opted for injecting the drugs straight into Brennan's blood stream. Of course, that would do little good since his heart wasn't beating. Placing his hands on Brennan's chest, Jordan pressed firmly.  
  
Eckhart watched him attempt compressions for several minutes before looking to the other doctor. The man gave a slight shake of his head. "It's not going to do any good; he's gone."  
  
"Then see that Mr. Mehler doesn't waste any more supplies," Eckhart said before regarding Brennan once more. He felt disappointment at the failure of his experiment, but nothing for the loss of Brennan's life. He removed his gaze from the corpse which now occupied his lab. "I suppose I should send my condolences to Adam."  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
BTW, Vixen, so you're gonna get me back for the cliffhangers, huh? Is that a promise? Because so far I haven't even been trying.  
  
And once again, thanks to everyone who has left reviews. You guys are wonderful. 


	14. Losses

Once again, this story is brought to you with fewer typos thanks to my beta- readers. Let's all give them a round of applause for putting up with me.  
  
On a side note, I survived midterms! Whoohoo! BTW, Ang, were you wondering if I was attending college in the area of creative writing or of torture? You weren't really clear on that. But I've taken four semesters of screenwriting and the school I'm currently attending is pure HELL, so I guess I qualify either way.  
  
Oh, and thanks to everyone who left death threats and "I hate you" notes for the last chapter. I always feel I've done something right when I get those. *evil grin*  
  
-----  
  
-----  
  
After she was tossed back into their cell, Emma screamed. She was supposed to be sharing this room with Brennan, but now it was her own private prison. A personal hell. She slammed herself against the door, pounding it with her fists.  
  
"Where is he?!" she yelled, throwing a tantrum. "What have you done with him!?"  
  
She kicked at the door, knowing it wouldn't open, yet there was nothing in this empty white room for her to break. She screamed again, wailing until her throat ached and she started to go hoarse. "WHERE IS HE?" she demanded once more before all the shouting and crying only made her cough.  
  
Slumping against the wall, she made her way to the corner and then sat down. She curled herself up as tightly as possible. It wasn't her friend she'd been screaming for; she knew that. Her need was to know what had been done with his body.  
  
Afraid to close her eyes, she laid on the cold floor, not willing to sleep. If she dreamed, she'd find herself back in that lab. It haunted her mind. Yet perhaps it was better her thoughts be haunted than empty.  
  
She couldn't feel anything. Emotions raged inside her head, yet the turmoil was all hers. There was nothing else. Nobody else. In her entire life, she had never seemed so truly alone. He'd left her by herself in this awful place.  
  
He'd left her...  
  
She was once told that when a person met a kindred spirit, they just knew. It was something that would strike them, like lightning. Emma had never imagined it could be so literal. She recalled fondly a time that now seemed an eternity ago, when she'd found him again. She'd taken his hand and he had shown her his gift, something he'd kept hidden his entire life. He'd shared his abilities with a complete stranger. Trusted her for no other reason than that they were alike.  
  
Since that day, he was always there for her. Whenever she needed him. And when she didn't. A soft smile touched her lips before vanishing.  
  
Brennan was gone from her life now. And he hadn't merely left her - not willingly. He'd been taken. She wondered what would happen to her now. If she ever got out of here, how was she supposed to tell Adam, Jesse, and Shal? Tell them that Brennan was dead. That his death hadn't been quick. That he'd died brutally. Drowned.  
  
She'd felt his fear despite the governor. It had taken such a long time for her mind to go silent. The skin around his wrists had been torn when she'd seen his body. He'd been tied and had obviously fought. She selfishly shoved aside her worries about how the others would react to the news. She was the one in pain! They should have been there to comfort her!  
  
Shivering, the tears returned and her body shook with renewed sobs. She traced her fingers along the floor before resting her head against it, trying to get comfortable, knowing she never would. There was no shoulder for her to cry on, no one to hold her and dry her tears. No...  
  
Brennan. She missed him so fiercely it hurt. And she loathed Eckhart with a hatred so true and pure that it frightened her. Emma wished that they would pod her instead of leaving her alone to deal with this rush of emotions that she couldn't even begin to make sense of.  
  
She longed to spend the rest of her life in an artificial sleep without dreams, safe in a drug-induced coma. Away from the pain.  
  
Away from a world in which her best friend had just been murdered.  
  
-----  
  
"Mr. Eckhart!" somebody shouted as he was making his way back to his office.  
  
He turned to the person, feeling the start of a rather bad headache. "What now?" he snapped. He wasn't happy at having his thoughts interrupted. He needed to decide what to do with Miss DeLauro. Putting her in stasis was the obvious choice, yet he almost felt as if he should return her to Adam. There had been a time when they'd been friends. It seemed somewhat unsporting to take two of his team at once.  
  
The messenger fidgeted. "I was sent to inform you that Mulwray woke up as we were taking him to the morgue."  
  
-----  
  
Eckhart shoved open the door to the morgue. Sure enough, Mulwray was sitting on one of the tables with a blanket wrapped around his shoulders. Perhaps his sympathies had been premature.  
  
Maybe one day he'd learn not to doubt the things which belonged to Adam. It was a lesson he'd soon have all eternity to learn.  
  
"Why isn't he in restraints?" Eckhart demanded.  
  
Brennan flinched from his loud voice, but otherwise he made no response. Jordan helped him to lie down, and Brennan stared at him in confusion before closing his eyes.  
  
"I can't tell you exactly how he was able to revive," Jordan said to Eckhart. "But he choked up the water by reflex."  
  
Eckhart bent over him and noticed that Brennan had lapsed back into unconsciousness. "Wake him," he instructed.  
  
Jordan was tempted to advise against that, but he did as ordered. He looked to Eckhart before administering the drugs. "You should give him a few minutes to come around."  
  
Eckhart waited impatiently as Brennan roused. When he opened his eyes, he stared blankly at Eckhart. His expression held a mixture of fear and bewilderment. There wasn't a trace of recognition.  
  
Eckhart fixed his gaze on Jordan. "What's wrong with him?"  
  
"That's what I'm trying to find out. Hold his arm," he requested, feeling much less tongue-tied around the other man today. When Eckhart did as instructed, Jordan drew a blood sample. Brennan jerked back immediately and clutched his arm like a small child holding his wound. He watched them with wide eyes.  
  
"I asked him a series of questions before you arrived," Jordan continued, somewhat disturbed. "He was unable to answer any of them."  
  
It took Eckhart a few minutes to stop studying Brennan who began to squirm under the scrutiny. "Could this be some kind of stunt on Mulwray's part?"  
  
Sadly, Jordan didn't think that was the answer. "Damage normally begins to occur when the brain is deprived of oxygen for five minutes. Mulwray was clinically dead for over three times that."  
  
"And the strand?" Eckhart asked next.  
  
Jordan gave him a slightly irritated look. He'd just told him Brennan had likely suffered serious brain damage, but all he cared about was his experiment. The pedestal he'd once placed Eckhart on was starting to crumble. "Still perfectly intact. It suffered no degeneration."  
  
"Will he regain his memory?" Eckhart continued, talking about Brennan as if he wasn't there.  
  
Jordan frowned. They were in new territory. He had no way of predicting the outcomes of their tests. "This isn't just amnesia. There's no way to tell. I'd say his odds are fifty/fifty."  
  
Staring at Brennan once more, Eckhart asked, "And right now he can't understand anything we're saying?"  
  
"It doesn't appear so." Jordan had difficulty continuing the discussion with Brennan sitting there watching them. "I'd like to proceed and give him the next injection. If we force him through the rest of the treatments ahead of schedule, it could improve his chances."  
  
"And if we stop entirely?" Eckhart stepped back from Brennan, seeming to lose interest in making him uncomfortable. He was either the best actor ever, or this wasn't a game. "Hypothetically, of course."  
  
Jordan was confused. "You want this to become permanent?"  
  
"It would be beneficial to have a member of Mutant X on our side," commented Eckhart, planning ahead.  
  
"We'd need to start tests on the strand again with a new subject. Plus, Mulwray will either regain everything or nothing. In the state he's in now, he would be useless to you for at least several years. At the moment, he doesn't even understand English. He's missing a lot more than his memories. Frankly, I'm not sure he'll ever be capable of comprehending anything."  
  
Eckhart decided it would be more beneficial to resume experimenting with the strand than to bother with trying to brainwash Mulwray. At least for the time being. "Would it be possible to recreate this outcome at a later date? Finish testing and then erase his memory of only the last few years, leaving everything else intact?"  
  
For a moment, Jordan watched Brennan as he tried using the blanket to dry his hair and clothes. He seemed to have already figured out that he didn't like water. "It's impossible to selectively alter memory," he explained. Besides, he didn't want to repeat this. "And once he's taken the final injection, I don't even think we'd be capable of damaging his memory at all."  
  
"What if we administered a small dose of 216?" Eckhart inquired, somehow remaining stoic while mentioning the virus.  
  
The turn in the discussion troubled Jordan. "After the changes to his DNA are complete, he'll be immune." He preempted the next question before it could asked. "If you try before hand, even trace elements of 216 would be fatal. By the time it's broken down Messiah to the point where the subject can no longer heal himself, irreparable damage will have been done to the host's body. Survival would be impossible no matter how closely we monitor the conditions of the experiment."  
  
Jordan paused, realizing that he'd stopped referring to Brennan by name. He quickly broke himself free from the detachment. He wouldn't allow himself to stop caring. "If you introduce 216 to Mulwray's system, you've killed him."  
  
Eckhart remained nonchalant. "Shame. I had hoped he could be rehabilitated from his outlaw lifestyle." He headed for the door, the conversation over. "Put him in restraints, give him the next injection, and then take him back to his room."  
  
Jordan nodded. "Yes, sir."  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
Okay, question for the audience time! Just out of curiosity, what makes you leave feedback on stories (not strictly mine, but in general)? Do you only comment on things you like? Perhaps try to sway the direction of a WIP? Do you feel afraid to leave negative reviews? Why? Why not? 


	15. Identities

Once he'd changed into dry clothes, Brennan's hands were recuffed behind his back. One of the two men that were with him then shoved him towards the door. He didn't know where he was supposed to go, but he instantly started walking.  
  
When he didn't respond quickly enough to the commands he didn't understand, he'd be hit. The large man constantly treated him roughly. The other, younger, who'd been there since he'd waken, seemed to interject on his behalf. Brennan did nothing.  
  
Not knowing who or where he was, he didn't know if he could trust his instinct to fight back. Maybe he'd done something to harm them and they had a right to hit him. Or even if they didn't, it would surely encourage them to abuse him further.  
  
His muscles were stiff, but as far as he could tell, he wasn't injured. Maybe being hit was a rare occurrence. He hoped they would treat him kindly since he couldn't lash out at them. He was their captive, and until he understood why, he was better off trying to avoid confrontation.  
  
He was either a hostage or a convict. Neither situation allowed him the option of kicking ass. Did he even know how to fight? If he was a criminal, he likely did. And being some kind of outlaw seemed to fit. He had noticed a couple tattoos when he'd gotten dressed. He was also in very good shape. Add that to the several days worth of stubble from not shaving and he likely had the whole scruffy, bad boy look going for him.  
  
On the bright side, however, from what he'd seen of his tattoos, they at least didn't say "Mayhem" and weren't of naked women. But they weren't military symbols either, so he could rule out being a POW.  
  
Besides, he didn't think any prisons were this clean and white. Perhaps he was in a mental institution. But they didn't handcuff patients, did they? Maybe the ones with amnesia got special treatment.  
  
Although, maybe he wasn't crazy. He might not understand them because he was from another country and didn't speak the language. What if he was an illegal immigrant? So why didn't he know anything about his home country? Heck, he didn't even know what country he was in now.  
  
He must have hit his head. That's what caused lame plots like this in all the movies, even though he wasn't certain which specific movies he was thinking of. Probably the really bad made for TV ones. Did he watch a lot of television? What was his favorite show? What were his options? He didn't even know what genres he liked. And how did he know words like "genre" but not remember a thing about who he was? His memories must be in his head somewhere, just scrambled or something. Not everything had been wiped clean.  
  
Yet he wasn't in a hospital. This place had obviously had a lot of money dumped into it. Possibly government funded. That would explain the wardrobe of the stiff, white-haired guy he'd met earlier.  
  
Maybe he was the son of a foreign politician and was being held for ransom. Or maybe not. That made no sense.  
  
For all he knew, he was an alien who'd been injured when his spaceship had crashed on this planet. Now, he was being held captive by a covert group of some nefarious shadow government... A prisoner of the Men in Black. On the other hand, that mental patient idea was seeming more and more likely.  
  
He wondered how long he'd been here? How old was he? He had the body of a man anywhere from 18 to 35. It was kinda hard to tell. What if he actually was in his thirties? Could he have already lived almost half of his life and not remember a single day of it? That was rather depressing.  
  
Stopping in front of a door, one of the men pressed his palm against some sort of scanner. As the light flicked from red to green, the other man released his hands.  
  
Brennan stared at the door as it was opened. His lack of memory suddenly terrified him once more. Figuring out who he was wasn't a game. He was without an identity in a strange place. Who knew what horrible... whateverness... lurked on the other side of that door.  
  
Quickly bracing himself, he stepped into the room, fully prepared to defend himself against... A girl?  
  
Brunette hair hid her face, and she was curled up in the corner, crying. He had a roommate? Girlfriend? Sister? Stranger? He felt as though he should comfort her, even though he didn't know her. There were bruises on her arms, clearly indicating that she was being held captive as well. He didn't think she was a threat.  
  
He watched her as sad blue eyes finally looked up at him. She was pretty. She froze, as if the mere sight of him was impossible, like she'd seen a ghost. He couldn't tell if she was frightened. She said something he couldn't understand, then stood.  
  
They stared at each other a moment before she ran over to him, fresh tears streaking her face. Happy tears? She smiled, hesitant but overjoyed, then she paused briefly before throwing her arms around him and hugging him so tightly he almost wasn't able to breathe. Brennan tensed, causing her to pull back. She brushed his hair back from his forehead and studied him.  
  
Eventually, she spoke again. Once more, the words made no sense. Brennan thought he should understand, but his brain refused to translate. He decided she was indeed speaking the same language he was thinking in, but he couldn't figure out how to reply. Everything was too confusing.  
  
Another tear rolled down her cheek, bittersweet this time, and he instinctively wiped it away. He felt like he somehow knew her. He no longer doubted that she knew him.  
  
-----  
  
Emma just stared at him in stunned silence for a while when he didn't say anything. His clothing was fresh and dry, yet his hair was still damp. And he seemed so withdrawn, so different. She knew he'd been dead. She'd seen his body with her own eyes.  
  
"Brennan..." she said carefully, afraid and hoping her fear wasn't of him. "What did they do to you?"  
  
He opened his mouth but then closed it again without replying. His behavior was making her very nervous. Was he even able to speak? How badly had Eckhart hurt him? "Do you understand me?"  
  
He showed no signs of comprehension, and she felt more tears break free. A simple nod would suffice, yet he only continued to look at her as though she were a stranger. "Please, Brennan, at least tell me you know who I am?"  
  
He brushed away her tears, yet pulled back when she tried to touch him. "It's okay," she said gently. "I'd never hurt you, Brennan."  
  
He blinked a few times, and she realized that he wasn't even responding to his own name. "Please no..." she whispered silently. He looked so lost. She'd give anything to remove her governor and was tempted to try yanking it from her neck. "Bren... talk to me, okay? You're scaring me."  
  
Carefully, she touched his hand, scared her fingers might pass right through him and praying he wouldn't retreat from her again. His stance shifted somewhat nervously, but he didn't draw his hand back. "Are you hurt?" she asked gently, her eyes glancing over his entire body several times. His wrists were healed, so he'd obviously slept.  
  
Of course he had, he'd been dead. She instantly chased that thought away. He was standing right in front of her. Alive. Breathing. Definitely not a hallucination. This was what she wanted - him back no matter what. But she refused to let herself believe he wouldn't be okay. It had only been another test and now he would heal, and she'd have her best friend back. "Please don't let me be dreaming," she pleaded to whomever might be listening. Then she tried to encourage Brennan to sit.  
  
Tugging his hand, she lowered herself to the floor and he sank down beside her. "You just need to sleep," she told him. "Then everything will be better."  
  
He gave her such a blank look it made her heart ache. He had no idea what was going on, and she longed to pull him close and protect him from ever being taken away from her again.  
  
"Lie down," she prodded gently, keeping her voice smooth and calming. "It's okay to sleep. I won't let anybody hurt you."  
  
She would stay awake and watch over him while he slept.  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
More very soon.  
  
And for those of you kind enough to leave reviews, if you can't find something negative to comment on (which I previously challenged you all to do), can you list something specific that you do like? I'm always trying to improve my writing skills, so constructive feedback is very much wanted, good or bad. 


	16. Memories

I would have posted this part sooner, but I had major writer's block, and then I lost my net connection for a while. But I think I might have my muse back (thanks, Cyndi, for the inspiration), so the next chapters should be better.  
  
-----  
  
-----  
  
After what seemed like only a few hours, Brennan's fitful sleep grew more restless, prompting Emma to move closer to him and softly stroke his hair. Her touch didn't comfort him and he began tossing. She took his hand when he started to mumble. She couldn't make out the words, but his voice was pained and afraid.  
  
He clung tightly to her hand before screaming for Adam. She quickly placed her other hand on his chest to stop his thrashing. "Brennan, it's okay now. You're safe," she assured him while wondering what horrible things were being done to him in his dreams.  
  
Her voice settled him and he eventually opened his eyes. He stared up at her. "Emma?" he asked before catching his breath.  
  
"Yeah." She smiled at him, delighted that he knew her name. "Yeah, I'm here."  
  
Had she been crying? Sitting up, he glanced around the room in confusion. "Where are we?"  
  
She kept her grip on his hand, not willing to let go yet. "Eckhart is holding us, remember?"  
  
His brow furrowed at that. "Who?"  
  
Her brief happiness disappeared. "Brennan, what's the last thing you remember?"  
  
"Brennan?" he repeated. He was Brennan? He supposed the name seemed familiar. He shook his head. "I think I know who I am, and I know you - I trust you... but other than that, there's nothing."  
  
She refused to panic. "Go back to sleep."  
  
"I want to remember. What happened to me, Em?" His eyes searched hers. "Help me."  
  
"I'm not sure how..." What was she supposed to tell him? That he'd been tortured for the past several days? That when she saw him last he was dead? Answering his question probably wasn't the best way to go about helping him.  
  
"The other men... maybe I know them, I'm not sure - they asked me questions, stupid things." He shrugged, then shifted his attention to picking at his fingernail. "I couldn't answer anything."  
  
"Like what year it is and who the president is? That kind of stuff?" Knowing he was worried, she took his hand once more.  
  
"I didn't really understand much, but in hindsight, I think so." He stared at her hand. She was all he knew, and even she wasn't completely familiar. "I'm pretty sure it's 2002. Still kinda foggy on the president thing. But on the bright side, I now at least know that there is a president, and I think I even know the gist of his job description."  
  
Giving him an encouraging smile, she replied, "Well, that's a start, I guess. I'm still not sure what you want me to do, though."  
  
He rubbed his thumb across the back of her hand before staring into her eyes. "You know me, right? So ask me questions that have something to do with me."  
  
"Okay, how about trying to remember who your favorite president was?" she asked, playing it safe. Personal questions weren't an area she was eager to venture into just yet. Not with him staring at her like that.  
  
Brennan suddenly smiled.  
  
"What? You remembered something?" she asked hopefully.  
  
He gave her a crooked grin. "Yeah. I got a D on my US History final." Not exactly his brightest moment, but it was a memory none the less.  
  
Emma did her best to match his grin. "So what subjects do you like?"  
  
"I'm not sure. English. Creative writing maybe." She squeezed his hand slightly and supposed he'd gotten that answer right.  
  
"How about some English questions then?" He shrugged and she offered him an encouraging look. "What's a verb?"  
  
"A word that expresses an act, occurrence, or mode of being. And I have no idea where that definition just came from." It was too rehearsed for him not to have once memorized it.  
  
"This is still good, though. Things are starting to come back." She aimed for another English question next, something where it wouldn't hurt if he couldn't answer. "So what's a complement?"  
  
He gazed over at her once more. "You have the most incredibly beautiful eyes..."  
  
Emma felt her face flush. "I said complement, not compliment. As in objective or subjective..." Why was he still looking at her like that?  
  
After brushing some hair from her face and tucking it behind her ear, he returned his stare to her eyes. He left his hand on her face. "I know what you meant."  
  
She suddenly felt a bit self-conscious under his intense gaze. "What are you doing?" she asked nervously.  
  
"Remembering what's important..." He kept watching her, studying her expression and memorizing every detail of her face. He definitely had strong feelings for her, although they were still confusing. "Why aren't you asking me any personal questions?"  
  
"Maybe I'm afraid you won't know the answers," she confessed, unable to avoid meeting his eyes. Maybe she was afraid he would.  
  
His mind continued to subconsciously arrange the pieces of his fragmented memories, and he suddenly pulled back from Emma. "Crap."  
  
"What?" she quickly asked, concerned.  
  
"I just recalled why I failed that exam," he explained. "I spent the entire night before in jail."  
  
That had come out of left field. Her curiosity quickly won out. "What for?"  
  
"I got pulled over for speeding," he replied, his tone dull.  
  
Emma frowned. "They don't throw people in jail for that, Brennan."  
  
He stared at the wall. "There was cocaine in the glove box."  
  
That response greatly confused her. She was his best friend; how could he have not ever mentioned this before? "You don't do drugs," she stated firmly.  
  
Suddenly he decided his toes were incredibly interesting and stared at his feet - anything to avoid looking at her. "It wasn't mine."  
  
She bent around so that he was forced to face her. "So they didn't believe you?" There had to be a perfectly reasonable explanation.  
  
"Actually, they did." He ran a hand through his hair and looked away again.  
  
Why was he acting so strangely? "If they understood that the drugs weren't yours, what was the problem?"  
  
"Neither was the car," he blurted guiltily before looking at her again. "I guess I am a criminal after all. I thought earlier that I might be."  
  
"You're not," she said a bit too quickly, wondering why she was so defensive. She knew about his past and had figured he'd "borrowed" a few cars once upon a time. Heck, she'd even caught him and Shalimar teaching Jesse the finer points of hotwiring. Why did it bother her so much that he was recalling it now?  
  
Because she had fallen for the knight in shining armor, not the car thief, she silently answered her own question. That was all behind him. He wasn't a criminal. "Well, not anymore." She gently rested her hand on his leg. "Why don't you try to get some sleep? Things will be more clear when you wake up."  
  
"Do I want them to be more clear?" he asked honestly. "So far I've discovered that my interests include stealing cars and getting tattoos." He pulled up his shirtsleeve, revealing the dragon on the inside of his arm. "What's up with this? And I've got some weird symbol back here..."  
  
Turning, he started to show her his lower back but then stopped. "How close of friends did you say we are again?"  
  
She literally laughed out loud at that. She knew exactly which tattoo he was referring to, although she'd never actually gotten a close look at it before considering its placement. "Why Brennan Mulwray, you're not suddenly considering making modesty one of your virtues, are you?" She cast him a wicked grin.  
  
He tugged his clothing back into place. "Maybe I should."  
  
"Hey, come on..." Emma pouted playfully. "You got to make fun of my bra the other day. It's payback time, buddy! And I didn't get a good look at it before, so I'm curious."  
  
Brennan merely gaped at her. "I did what with your bra when? And what before? I don't recall a before. Why and where was there a before?"  
  
Her smile softened at his clueless expression. "Don't worry, it was just an innocent game of drunken dojo double-dare. Hee hee, say that three times fast. Um anyway, we were mainly just picking on Jesse. Adam caught us and broke things up pretty fast. And the bra thing is... a long story."  
  
Leaning back against the wall once more, he sighed. "I'm starting to think my life involves a lot of long stories." He glanced over at her. "And I'm wondering if you're one of them."  
  
She propped herself against the wall beside him. "How so?"  
  
"The whole bra thing, for one." He paused awkwardly. "Was that story innocent also, or something I would've bragged about to my friends the morning after? And am I the kind of guy who boasts afterwards? I don't much think I want there to have been a morning after with you if I am." Chances were that would ruin whatever they might have now.  
  
She smiled faintly. "You actually take relationships very seriously. You've got this cocky exterior, but underneath you're really quite sweet. And the bra story was also innocent, just to clarify."  
  
"Sweet?" he repeated, giving her one of his looks.  
  
She shrugged, and they sat in silence for a minute. "It means 'never give up,' by the way," she eventually said. "Your tattoo. You told me about it later that night."  
  
"Oh." That said, they slipped back into a companionable quiet.  
  
"Why are we being held?" he abruptly asked when the silence stretched.  
  
"That's another long story." She noticed the look in his eyes and knew he was blaming himself. "But it's not because of anything you did."  
  
"Who are you to me?" She was in this with him, whatever that meant. She also seemed hesitant to tell him what was going on, yet he still trusted her. She made him feel safe.  
  
"How do you mean?" she asked nervously, feeling herself melt under his gaze. She was starting to hope she was becoming more than just his friend.  
  
"I just want to know that if when I wake up in the morning and by some miracle things are actually more clear, you'll still be my entire world." Currently, she was his everything. What would he do if his memory returned and all that changed?  
  
Whoa... She swallowed at the lump in her throat. "I know that you'll still be mine." He leaned closer to her and she pulled back before finding out if he'd been about to kiss her. She couldn't let their relationship progress while his thoughts were still fuzzy. She wanted something more, but right now she merely made him feel secure. He didn't know her. Whether or not they were going to take the step beyond friendship was something he needed to decide in the cold light of day when he regained all the facts. "Go to sleep, Brennan," she said softly.  
  
Somewhat hurt by her rejection yet still taking her advice, he stretched out on the floor and tried to get comfortable. For some reason, it didn't seem odd to him when Emma curled up by his side. Instead, he felt relieved.  
  
-----  
  
As Adam walked past the dojo, Jesse hopped down off the steps and stood directly in his path. "So I've been thinking..."  
  
"As have I," replied Adam, completely unfazed by Jesse's abrupt dismount from the stairs.  
  
"What have you got?" Jesse asked, hoping he was ready to make a move. Any move.  
  
"A list that still needs work," he answered honestly before sidestepping his impatient young friend and heading for his room.  
  
Matching his pace, Jesse remained at his side. When Adam entered his room, he only opened the door wide enough for himself. Not taking the hint, Jesse merely strolled straight through the wall. He stared at Adam who sighed.  
  
After typing something on his keyboard, Adam turned the screen toward Jesse. Displayed was a list of companies. "I've narrowed it down to six possibilities," he said.  
  
Jesse pulled his own list from his pocket and tossed it on Adam's desk. "Mine is only four."  
  
"Based upon...?" Adam inquired.  
  
"Unusually suspicious behavior." Jesse shoved his hands into his pockets and tried not to start pacing while Adam read his list. "And yours?"  
  
As he compared the lists, Adam frowned. "Exactly the opposite. I've chosen only businesses that came up perfectly clean in every way." Not a single name on each of their lists matched.  
  
Jesse ran his fingers through his hair, a habit he'd formed when he was overly tense or nervous. "Where do we go from here, Adam?" he demanded. "Tell me what to do, because I honestly don't have anything more to go on."  
  
Adam shut down his computer. "Neither do I." He'd already dug as deeply as was possible. They'd exhausted all their resources and were still empty handed.  
  
"No," Jesse said firmly. "Don't tell me that you don't know."  
  
"Then what would you have me say?" Adam asked. "You'd prefer that I lie to you?"  
  
Jesse met his gaze. "Yes." He waited a moment, and when Adam remained silent, he spun and stormed out. He didn't bother using the door this time either.  
  
Shaking his head, Adam sat on the edge of his bed and closed his eyes. The situation was far more grim than he wanted to admit. Not only had Mutant X lost its two newest members, but now Adam feared he might also lose Jesse if Brennan and Emma weren't found soon.  
  
"Should I go after him?" Shalimar's voice asked from his doorway.  
  
Adam glanced over at her. "Probably. Keep him from doing anything without thinking first."  
  
"Not really sure I'm the best person to lecture on not charging into things." She grinned at Adam. "But I'll talk to him."  
  
Adam nodded and she turned to go before pausing. "Why don't we just march into Genomex and take a few hostages of our own?"  
  
"You're right," Adam agreed. "Looking before you leap isn't a strong point of yours." He walked over to her and wrapped his arm around her shoulders. "I know Mason well enough to know he wouldn't respond to that kind of threat. He's well aware that he has the upper hand. I don't want you or Jesse getting hurt."  
  
"I know," she said softly. Adam was just looking out for them, and he was doing everything in his power to locate their missing teammates.  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
As for the tattoos, we all know that they're there, so might as well use them in fic. *shrug* Now everybody raise your hand if you think the show should give us a better look at them. Um, you know, for story research purposes... Yeah, that's what I meant. No other reasons... 


	17. Nightmares

I'm going to take a second to thank my lovely beta-readers again. Although neither of them found any typos in this chapter, and one is now certain Hell has frozen over. I think I've just learned how to be nefarious enough to slip the errors right under their noses. I'm really quite proud of myself. *takes a bow*  
  
----- -----  
  
"Jess, you okay?" Shalimar asked when she eventually found him sitting at one of the computers. She'd expected him to be in his room.  
  
"Fine," he answered without looking up at her.  
  
She leaned over his shoulder. "What ya doin'?"  
  
He gave her a slightly annoyed glance. "We haven't brought anybody into the underground in a while. We should do that."  
  
"I know you wouldn't put a new mutant in danger just to attempt forcing a confrontation with the GSA," she scolded.  
  
After flicking off the screen, he hopped out of his chair. "We've always managed to keep them safe in the past. Most of the time," he added under his breath.  
  
She gently touched his arm. "Jesse..."  
  
"Yeah, I know." He shrugged her off. "I promise I won't put anybody else in danger. I'm going to bed."  
  
As she watched him walk away from her, Shalimar was tempted to call him back. There was a part of her that wanted to risk his plan. Why'd she have to go and tell Adam that she would talk him out of doing something rash? She was the poster girl for blindly rushing in.  
  
Sighing agitatedly, she dropped her hands to her sides and stared silently at his back as Jesse stalked off.  
  
-----  
  
Jordan hit rewind on the tape then leaned back in his chair. He glanced at the other monitors to be certain Brennan was currently still sleeping before queuing up the old security footage and pressing play.  
  
Sure enough, Brennan and DeLauro were actually talking. He was clearly regaining his memory. Jordan slapped the counter in glee and was tempted to do a spin in his chair before he noticed the normal security guard was observing him as closely as he'd been watching Brennan.  
  
He tapped the glass of the screen. "This... is incredible," he said before ejecting the tape and handing it back to the man. "Thank you."  
  
He quickly exited the room and practically sprinted down the hall. He needed to find a computer. The Messiah Stand was proving to be everything he'd imagined. It not only regenerated but restored. The scientific possibilities were mind-blowing.  
  
Drowning Brennan had proven itself to be a far more useful test than he'd thought possible. This even backed up the theory that the strand could stop the aging process. Eckhart would be thrilled by his report.  
  
Not to mention the response from the medical community. But he was jumping way ahead of himself there. These tests were classified and he wouldn't be able to publish any of his findings until they'd broken the strand down into something marketable. After several more experiments with Mulwray, they'd be ready to start manipulating the strand, possibly start production on vaccines to practically any known sickness.  
  
Brennan would eventually see the greater good. He wasn't being permanently harmed. Eckhart wasn't the monster he made him out to be. Jordan refused to let himself believe there was an ulterior motive behind the tests. The Messiah Strand was far too powerful to fall into the hands of somebody wicked.  
  
The paper he was about to write would change the face of genetic research.  
  
-----  
  
The room was cold and gray, and the metal under his skin chilled his bare back. Brennan attempted to sit but couldn't move. There were no restraints to hold him down, yet no matter how hard he forced himself, his body wouldn't respond. It wouldn't even obey his demands to breathe.  
  
Somebody set a tray of tools on the small table beside the one on which he lay. A gloved hand lifted a scalpel, and he realized that he was terrified. To everyone else, he knew he must appear as though dead.  
  
The sheet was pulled down so it no longer covered his chest, and the hand with the blade hovered over him. Brennan willed the man to check for a pulse. He wanted to scream that he was still alive, yet no words would come.  
  
He wasn't able to move or speak, but for some reason he could see everything despite his eyes being closed. He tried again to breathe. He only needed to draw a single breath, and then this would stop.  
  
Pain registered clearly as the knife bit into his flesh, starting an incision that would soon be joined by others to form the shape of a Y on his chest. His blood stood out boldly compared to the unsaturated tones of the morgue, yet it didn't pool along the line of the cut. Dead men don't bleed.  
  
But he wasn't dead! He silently screamed.  
  
Suddenly, the world around him shattered and he was on the floor of the room he shared with Emma. He launched himself bolt upright and jumped to his feet, shaking his limbs to be certain they still worked. He was dripping with sweat, his entire body trembling. His head was pounding and he viciously pressed his hands to his temples.  
  
"Not real, not real, not real..." he whispered frantically to himself, making certain that he remained where he was and didn't blink and end up back in the morgue. That hadn't actually happened. It was only a nightmare. Merely a harmless dream. It couldn't hurt him. It wasn't real.  
  
He looked over at Emma who was still asleep, and he made sure not to wake her. She was normally so peaceful in slumber, but tonight her features were strained and she still seemed exhausted. This place was destroying her. *He* was destroying her.  
  
His precious Emma, and he was slowly losing her a little bit more every time he'd be returned after having been tortured. He wished he wasn't able to remember. He was changing, becoming something else and losing his sanity in the process. And Emma was forced to watch it happen. They were becoming so close, and yet he feared she'd slip away from him.  
  
How many restless nights could she stay by his side and comfort him? He'd already reached the point where his mind couldn't be put at ease simply by her presence. She was wearing herself out attempting the impossible. There was only so much she could do to help him.  
  
Brennan wanted to scream, shout, break something... anything. But instead, he forced himself to be silent. He needed to calm down. He was a wreck.  
  
Racing to the small bathroom, he leaned on the counter, breathing heavily. He pulled his shirt off and stared at his chest, tracing his fingers across his skin. There was no incision, there never had been. It had almost happened but hadn't.  
  
Brennan looked hard at himself in the mirror. Why the hell hadn't it happened? People didn't wake up after dying!  
  
-----  
  
Emma stayed back and watched him in silence. His shoulders were tense, but otherwise he seemed stoic. Brennan simply stared into the mirror, not aware of her presence.  
  
She wondered if his amnesia had cleared up. She saw his eyes in the reflection and she knew. There was so much pain there. His memory had returned. Everything had come back... Including the last few days.  
  
How cruel had it been of her to hope it would? Maybe it would have been better for Brennan to have no memories at all than to be able to recall his own death. But she'd so desperately wanted him to remember her.  
  
"God dammit!" He suddenly smashed his fists into the glass, causing a stream of cracks to explode through his reflection.  
  
Emma jumped slightly at the abrupt outburst. But the stillness had returned as instantly as it had been broken, and she moved to Brennan's side. Taking his bleeding hands, she held them over the sink.  
  
The second she turned on the water, he pulled away. "Brennan, you're bleeding," she said softly.  
  
He looked down at his hands. "It doesn't matter. I shouldn't even be here."  
  
His tone was completely subdued, and she wished she could read him. "Do you... remember anything?" She knew he did.  
  
"I died." He kept staring at his hands as a drop of blood fell and hit the floor. Ten minutes later and his nightmare would have been real - he'd have revived during his own autopsy. "I should still be dead. I don't belong here." He couldn't ignore this.  
  
"Then neither do I," she said firmly. She'd died once as well. "Do you believe that's true?"  
  
He grabbed her arms and ran his hands along them, needing to touch her. He didn't even notice the trail of red he left on her skin. "I'd never been so afraid as that day, Em. I should have been there for you after, but I didn't understand, I couldn't. Right now, I don't even know if I'm alive."  
  
She knew he hadn't known how to react after her seemingly miraculous resurrection. Shalimar had told her later that she'd found him drunk that night. Not enough to be completely trashed, but enough to be numb. Emma had seen him drink before, but she couldn't recall ever seeing him in a state where she no longer considered him sober.  
  
He shook his head as tears streaked his face. "With you, there was a reason for your revival. I don't even have that." She hadn't waken with a god-damn toe tag. Brennan was surprised they hadn't performed the autopsy regardless. Hell, he'd just wake up again after.  
  
His hands slid down to find hers and she locked her fingers with his. "You are alive, Brennan," she assured him. She'd felt so lost after what had happened with Caleb. It was an experience she hoped she'd never have to share.  
  
Especially not with Brennan. But now he'd been there as well.  
  
She traced her hands up his arms this time, the reverse of his action, and he moved closer. "You're alive," she said again.  
  
He moved another step forward and ended up with her trapped between him and the wall. He slid his leg beside hers and pressed their bodies together. Her nearness grounded him. "I need you."  
  
Letting the wall support her, she leaned back and gasped. His touch sent a tingle of electrical charge everywhere his fingers traced her skin. She'd never felt so alive.  
  
He leaned his forehead against hers, feeling her gentle breathing mixing with his own. She was his lifeline, his one saving grace, his world. Why hadn't he realized how important she was to him before now? It had taken losing everything else. He could never lose her. He tenderly cupped the side of her face in his palm.  
  
When their lips were only a hair's breadth apart, the cell door opened.  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
I know, I'm cruel and broke them up before they could kiss. But hey, you guys really should know me enough by now to have seen that one coming.  
  
Oh, and to those of you who are shocked that I've actually killed Brennan TWICE, that's nothing. Daniel Jackson only wishes I was this nice to him! Mwhaahaaahaaa... Yes, I know, I'm evil and I need to seek profession help. 


	18. Fears

Since this story is around 30,000 words now, and people are starting to lose track of what's going on, here's a quick catch up for you all.  
  
LAST TIMES ON THE CONTINUING SAGA OF NAME OF SCIENCE...  
  
Eckhart captured Brennan and Emma after they unknowingly walked into a GSA trap. Brennan is now being used to test something called the Messiah Strand, which has given him the ability to heal himself while he sleeps, and the experiment is entering the final stages. Brennan has already died twice during these tests and is starting to snap. He also suspects that Adam might somehow be involved in things due to Eckhart mentioning him. Emma is trying to provide moral support for her friend, and their relationship is slowly becoming something more.  
  
Meanwhile, Adam and the rest of the MX team have been attempting to find their missing teammates. Not able to accomplish that task, they've begun searching for Eckhart who is said to be on vacation but apparently never left town. This has led to an investigation of local businesses for a company other than Genomex that might be a front for Eckhart's research. They've met nothing but dead ends, and now Jesse is considering taking an unwise course of action.  
  
***  
  
Another note, my beta-readers didn't find any mistakes in this chapter either, but we all know that they're hiding in here somewhere. *grin*  
  
Oh, and you can all thank Cyndi for Emma's chicken comment. She said that in an e-mail and I laughed so hard I just had to use it. Although it was much funnier when she said it.  
  
And now on with the story...  
  
-----  
  
-----  
  
Emma instantly placed herself between Brennan and the man who entered their room. "Not now," she growled at him. Nobody was taking Brennan from her again. "You leave him alone!"  
  
Brennan grabbed her wrist as she tried to march across the room and give him a piece of her mind. The man wasn't his handler, just another nameless lackey. He didn't want Emma getting herself into trouble.  
  
The man stared at her. "I'm just here to offer you breakfast." He then gave Brennan a glare that he translated to mean the offer most certainly didn't include him.  
  
"Well, your timing sucks!" she shot back before looking the guy over. "What happened to..." She waved her hand in front of her face, indicating her nose.  
  
The man shifted his weight from one foot to the other in annoyance. "Your previous escort is no longer assigned to you." He carefully scrutinized Emma, not overly impressed with her. "I, however, am prepared to deal with the likes of the two of you and your childish antics."  
  
Emma visibly fumed and Brennan held her wrist tighter in warning before he stepped forward. "The two of us?" he repeated. "I'm under the impression that you're just my girl's caterer. You have no place messing with me, and you really don't want to see my *antics.*"  
  
Ignoring the threat, he motioned to the door and waited for Emma. When she made no move to go with him, he sidestepped Brennan and grasped her arm. "You'll come with me."  
  
"Let her go," Brennan ordered over-protectively before taking a swing at the jerk. His fist impacted with the man's stomach, and Brennan immediately followed the punch with a kick that sent the guy stumbling backward. Grabbing a fistful of shirt, Brennan shoved him hard against the wall. He prepared to hit him again but stopped himself. If this idiot was Emma's new handler, it probably wasn't wise to beat the crap out of him.  
  
Slowly, Brennan released him. "From now on, you'll ask her nicely," he said coldly. "And if you ever touch her, speak rudely to her, or so much as look at her in any way that I don't feel is appropriate, we'll resume our little conversation. Understood?"  
  
"Perfectly," the man replied while straightening his shirt. Then when Brennan lowered his guard, he threw a punch of his own, hitting him in the face. "But realize you two aren't the only ones who know how to break a few noses."  
  
As Brennan wiped the blood from his upper lip, the man turned to Emma. "Do you want to eat or not?"  
  
"Leave us alone," she answered angrily, moving to Brennan's side. She tried to get a look at his injured nose as the other man left.  
  
"Shit, that was stupid," Brennan mumbled while sitting down.  
  
Emma just shook her head at him. "Did you really have to hit him?"  
  
He looked up at her, still holding his nose. "You should have gone with him. You don't bite the hand that feeds you, Em."  
  
Stooping by his side, she pulled his hand away and inspected his nose, carefully touching his face. "You're the one who threw the first punch, Bren," she reminded him. "I don't think it's broken, but tilt your head back. That will help stop the bleeding."  
  
"I didn't like him being rough with you." That idiot had laid a hand on his Emma. *His* Emma... He looked at her for a few seconds before finally leaning his head back.  
  
"It's you we need to worry about," she said softly, realizing that she was clinging desperately to his hand. "I thought they were going to take you again. I don't want them to touch you... Oh god, Brennan, I don't want to lose you."  
  
He wanted to comfort her, but he couldn't. He'd be lying if he said things would be okay. "It's what Eckhart will do when he's through with me that scares me. I have a right to be worried about you, Em. I doubt he'll let you go once I'm dead."  
  
"Stop it." She stared at him. "I won't listen if you say stuff like that. I'm not ready to write you off, Brennan. I never will be."  
  
"If they take me again, I won't survive it," he told her honestly. "They've already tested me against my Achilles' heel and my greatest fear. Whatever is done next..."  
  
"You'll make it through," she said firmly, lifting his chin back up when he looked at her again. "You've survived the worst, right? Whatever comes next, you'll hang on, and you'll keep fighting until we get out of here. You are not dying here, Brennan."  
  
He pushed her hands away and stood up so that he could start pacing. "I ALREADY HAVE!" he shouted at her before he was able to bite his tongue.  
  
She suddenly noticed what he'd just told her and softened her tone. "Brennan, water is your weakness, but it's not your greatest fear." He'd told her his greatest fear was having his own power used against him.  
  
She caught his eyes and choked back her sob. "That's what was done to you the other day, wasn't it? They electrocuted you. Why didn't you tell me?"  
  
"How does it help for you to know?" he asked, his voice also quiet once more. "Everything that's done to me hurts so bad, Em. But you can't stop it. You can't do anything."  
  
He was wrong. "We're in this together, Brennan!"  
  
"No! I am not dragging you down with me, Em. This has nothing to do with you!" he snapped angrily but somehow never raised his volume. "It's only supposed to be hurting me..."  
  
Only hurting him? Did he have any idea what seeing him tortured was doing to her? How could he think this wasn't hurting her? "Did you die that time as well?" she demanded while attempting not to shout at him.  
  
"I don't know. Probably." He felt weird and decided to stop talking. "Since they'll torture me again regardless, I'm going back to sleep."  
  
He laid down on the floor and Emma sat still for a few minutes before snuggling up next to him. Sighing, he slipped his arm around her before dozing off.  
  
-----  
  
Emma snapped awake as Brennan suddenly tossed restlessly. Another nightmare? She rolled over and rubbed her eyes. Something was wrong.  
  
He thrashed again and choked, wet with perspiration. There was also a problem with the way he was breathing. He was taking in huge breaths but still didn't seem able to get enough air.  
  
"Brennan?" She grabbed his hands and tried to calm him. He kept writhing in his sleep. What was going on?! Feeling herself start to panic, she wondered if she should wake him. Was he having some sort of relapse? Then wouldn't sleeping be the best possible thing for him?  
  
He gasped again, and she decided leaving him like this definitely wasn't helping. She held onto him more tightly. "Brennan, wake up!" He struggled but she didn't release him. "You're safe. It's just a dream."  
  
Waking, he broke his hand free and instinctively shoved her back. She recoiled from the impact. Brennan had just hit her - not hard, but his touch had delivered a very real electrical charge.  
  
-----  
  
"Oh god, Emma, I'm sorry," Brennan said, fully waking and realizing what he'd done. Then he truly saw the bruising on her upper arm for the first time. He pushed up her shirtsleeve to get a better look. There were also faint marks on her wrist. "Tell me I didn't do this."  
  
She was staring at him with wide eyes as she caught her breath. "I'm not hurt," she assured him. "And you didn't. It's from before, remember?" She acquired the bruises when she'd been dragged away from his body. Her governor had even been set off a few times as punishment for her behavior, but it was the rough handling that left the marks.  
  
Brennan shook his head. He didn't remember seeing them before. He stood and moved as far away from her as possible. "Maybe you shouldn't come near me," he said before starting to cough. When the fit ended, he wiped his face. He was covered with sweat. And there was dried blood on his hands.  
  
He instantly began to rub his palms together, then wiped them on his clothes, trying to remove the blood. He stumbled to the bathroom and began to wash his hands. His skin was perfect. The cuts were gone.  
  
But he HAD been cut. He started at the broken mirror, his blood still in the cracks. Picking up one of the several fallen shards from the counter, he squeezed it tightly until his fist dripped crimson.  
  
"Brennan, stop," Emma's voice said from beside him, her pitch elevated from nervousness. He was frightening her.  
  
He threw the piece of glass at the wall, and Emma made a small shriek as it impacted. He turned to face her before opening and closing his fingers several times, as if he'd never seen his hand before. Was he becoming dangerous? Emma was definitely trembling.  
  
"It's not real blood." He looked up at her again. "I don't need blood. Do you think my heart even pumps anymore? There's no reason why it should. I'm dead after all. Or undead," he corrected, his sentences confusing. "Whatever I am."  
  
"Brennan, listen to me," Emma said slowly, her words careful. "You are still alive. I told you that before. I need you to believe me."  
  
He ran his hand along the wall. "I could paint this room red," he told her, looking at the smear he'd left behind. "I could bathe this entire building in blood and still live through it."  
  
She grasped his other hand and placed it on her chest, over her heart. Then, picking up another fragment of the mirror, she closed her own fist around it, wincing as she cut herself. Grabbing his sliced hand, she let their blood mix before placing her free hand on his chest and completing the loop.  
  
"Whatever Eckhart does to you, you can't let it change who you are," she said, noticing the strange tingle in her palm. Whatever was being done to him wasn't important. What mattered was that his heart still beat under her hand. "Feel this. Right here, now. This is what's real. It's the same blood, yours and mine. Forget about Eckhart, he cannot control you. He's nothing. There is only me and you. It's going to stay that way."  
  
Brennan closed his eyes and leaned his forehead against hers. "I feel like he's stolen my soul." He could no longer breathe and fell to his knees. Then he began to cough uncontrollably.  
  
Emma remained standing, and when he looked up, he knew why. They weren't alone.  
  
-----  
  
Emma placed herself between Brennan and the three men. Two were typical guards, the one that always came for Brennan and another. The other was a young man in a white lab coat that she recognized as Mehler. "You aren't taking him."  
  
It was the Jordan who spoke first, his tone sympathetic. "We have to."  
  
Emma lunged at him and was grabbed by one of the guards. "He can't even breathe! What kind of monsters are you?"  
  
His handler pulled Brennan to his feet next, and he tried to jerk free. Jordan placed a hand on his arm to stop his fight. "You don't want to do this. Just come willingly."  
  
Brennan struggled away from Jordan. "You don't ever touch me." He made a move to take out the other guard, but he ended up just being hit by his handler. Hard. His breathing was terribly labored, and knowing he couldn't win this fight, he forced his way to Emma, placing his hand to the back of her neck.  
  
He was struck again from behind before he could zap her governor. The blow was to the back of his head and neck and rendered him unconscious. He collapsed limply to the floor since Emma wasn't permitted to stop his fall. Jordan bent over him then glanced up at DeLauro.  
  
"No!" she shouted. The second goon gripped her arm more tightly at her protest. This couldn't go on. "BRENNAN!"  
  
He didn't stir and she knew there was something horribly wrong with him. Jordan knew also. He should have gotten up after that last blow. "It's okay," he said to Emma. "We're not going to hurt him, only run some scans and find out what's going on."  
  
"You're lying," she screamed at him despite his sounding sincere. "How do I know what you'll do? Maybe today Eckhart will feel like seeing how well he heals with a bullet in his chest. Or maybe since you just did water, fire will be next. Hell, why not chop off his head and see if he still runs around afterward, like chickens! This is sick! YOU CAN'T DO THIS!"  
  
One of the guards slapped her across the face to silence her. Jordan quickly held up his hand. "Stop," he ordered. "Just get Mulwray and let's go. She's not our concern."  
  
With that, Emma was shoved to the floor and Brennan's limp form taken by the guards. Getting up, she made a sprint for the door but didn't catch it before it closed. She slammed her fists against it. Damn them!  
  
Sliding down the wall, she pulled her knees to her chest and started to cry.  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
Now for something different, everybody go review somebody else's story! The other writers need feedback also. But if you're reading something outside of fanfiction.net, please tell me the URL. I love to read but don't have to time to search the entire net for new MX sites. Oh hey, maybe we should start a Mutant X book club! 


	19. Actions

Hope everyone had a happy Thanksgiving. Sorry about the delay in updating, but I took the weekend off. And now we return from our commercial break...  
  
-----  
  
-----  
  
Shalimar rose with the sun, and after stretching, she headed for the kitchen to look for breakfast. As she trod softly through Sanctuary, she passed Adam who was asleep at one of the computers. She was surprised that Jesse wasn't also.  
  
Deciding to be nice and offer to fix him something yummy to eat, she strolled back to his room and knocked on the door. "Jess, you awake?"  
  
She knocked a bit harder and the door slipped open. Sticking her head into the room, she looked around. Jesse's bed was empty. Upon entering the room, she noticed that his jacket was also absent from its usual place.  
  
His TV remote had been set on his dresser, covering a folded sheet of paper. She slid the paper out from under the remote control and unfolded it. Then she just stared at the single word in the center of the page, printed in Jesse's distinct handwriting.  
  
~ Sorry. ~  
  
Dropping the paper, she grabbed the remote and hit the power button. An all too familiar, blue haired, computer generated girl appeared on the screen. "Oh, Jesse, you didn't..." Shalimar mumbled to herself, realizing what he'd done.  
  
As she turned off the television, she abruptly yelled "ADAM!" at the top of her lungs.  
  
Disheveled from just having woken up, he sprinted into the room before thirty seconds had gone by. "What is it?"  
  
"Jesse's an idiot!" she blurted, then realized Adam was waiting for further explanation. "He leaked himself to Proxy Blue."  
  
"Are you certain?" Adam asked, rubbing his face and trying to fully wake so he could focus.  
  
She merely stared at him. "It's exactly what I would do if I'd told me not to do anything."  
  
Adam nodded. "Go after him. I'll track his com-link signal."  
  
-----  
  
Twenty minutes later, Shalimar dismounted from her bike and tossed off her helmet. She flicked her finger over her ring to activate it. "Adam, I found the Mustang," she said, having parked her motorcycle right beside it.  
  
"Good," Adam's voice replied. "He's should be less than a mile away from you, but he's moving north."  
  
"I'm on it," she reported back, sprinting into the park. She lifted her ring near her mouth again. "Jesse, answer me."  
  
Waiting, she received no reply. "Damn it, Jesse, I know you can hear me, so you had better get your ass back to Sanctuary before you get nabbed by the GSA."  
  
Once more there was no reply and she frowned. "I'm sorry for threatening," she said sweetly, forcing herself to sound as sincere as possible. "You know I didn't mean to be rude. I just love you and I'm worried. Now come on home and I'll fix you pancakes and you can submerge yourself in a nice cup of coffee. Mmm coffee..."  
  
"I can't do that, Shal," eventually came the reply.  
  
"When I find you, I'm gonna pound you into a bloody pulp and then drench you with BBQ sauce and hang you over a hill of fire ants," she shouted at her ring. Screw the nice approach, it wasn't her style. "Then I'll tie your skeleton behind my bike and drive home, dragging you over all the speed-bumps in the entire city! And when Adam asks what happened, I'll tell him the GSA got to you first and messed you up. And once your bones have been reassembled and you've been stitched back together and grounded for life, I'll get praised for rescuing you, and Adam will love me more because now I'M THE GOOD ONE!"  
  
Jesse's voice sounded almost humored as he responded to her irate yelling. "You said not to risk anybody else and I'm not. I'll come home when I can bring Brennan and Emma with me," he told her. "Gotta go now, Shal, I have company."  
  
With that, their conversation ended.  
  
-----  
  
An oxygen mask was being slipped onto his face as Brennan came to. He'd already been moved to one of the labs and was securely strapped down. But the only thing that fully registered was that he was having extreme difficulty drawing breaths. "Why can't I breathe?" he forced himself to ask before coughing.  
  
Jordan touched his face, keeping the mask in place. He adopted a troubled expression. Why the hell wasn't he still asleep? If he kept fighting to stay conscious, the strand couldn't heal him. "I need you to try to sleep," he ordered.  
  
Brennan flinched from the feel of Jordan's fingers against his cheek. "Tell me what's going on," Brennan demanded, still struggling greatly to get enough air.  
  
"Are you familiar with ARDS?" Jordan asked, fairly certain that was what they were dealing with. When Brennan shook his head slightly, he continued, trying to explain what was happening. "I think you're experiencing Acute Respiratory Distress Syndrome - secondary drowning."  
  
Clearly not understanding, Brennan just kept staring at him. "Why?" The word came out rasped.  
  
Jordan was tempted to just sedate him. Now was not a good time to need to deal with that damn Mulwray stubbornness. But seeing the trace of fear he was trying so frantically to conceal, Jordan relented. "Your body is essentially attacking your lungs and filling them with fluid," he said, keeping his tone even so as not to further scare Brennan. "There are other causes for this, and we're going to run tests just to rule them out, but I'm positive the near-drowning is to blame. You aspirated - breathed in - a fair amount of salt water. There is still salt in your lungs that your body is viewing as a threat and it's trying to dissolve it."  
  
Brennan tried not to panic at what he'd just been told. He was practically drowning all over again. "Will I die?" He locked his eyes with Jordan's, needing the truth. Dear God, he couldn't be going through this again. Was it possible for him to wake up from death yet another time?  
  
Jordan brushed his hair back from his forehead as Brennan's breathing grew even worse. "I won't let that happen, okay?" he promised. "I'm going to treat you and stop this from getting any worse, but I need to sedate you now. You'll be fine."  
  
Closing his eyes, Brennan gave a small nod before lying still and not resisting as Jordan inserted the needle into his arm and administered the drug. Brennan finally drifted into unconsciousness right as Eckhart entered the room.  
  
"I've no doubt this is ARDS," Jordan relayed as he looked over at the man, but Eckhart already knew. It was the reason he'd used salt water. He wanted to see if Brennan would drown internally.  
  
Eckhart merely nodded. "Why is this just now becoming a concern?"  
  
"He'd already expelled the water from his lungs when he first woke. His body is just now viewing the remaining salt as a foreign substance and his system is responding by trying to dissolve it, which is what's causing the distress," Jordan informed, repeating himself in order to completely fill his superior in on the situation. "Even though he slept last night, the strand would have had no reason to fight this then since it hadn't yet become an actual threat."  
  
Eckhart took Brennan's latest chart from him and glanced over it before handing it back. "Prognosis?"  
  
"His breath sounds are wet, and not yet improving. I think it best if we intervene and not allow this to play out. The harder he fights, the worse it will become. If the strand doesn't begin correcting this within the hour, I'd like permission to induce a coma in order to paralyze his lungs. Then he'll need to be put on a respirator and I suggest administering diuretics and nitric oxide." Setting the clipboard aside, Jordan shoved his hands into the pockets of his lab coat and waited for Mr. Eckhart's approval.  
  
"You know I don't like interfering in the experiments," he said.  
  
"I am aware of that, sir," Jordan replied. "However, I don't think it's wise to let Mulwray die again. He might have sustained damage the last time that just hasn't come to our attention yet. In fact, when he recovers from this, I have a list of tests I'd like run before we proceed further."  
  
Fetching the printout he'd made, he handed it to Eckhart who read the list. "Perhaps it would be easier for you to tell me what tests you *don't* want done, Mr. Mehler," Eckhart said, not bothering to finish the lengthy list.  
  
"I know you like to be thorough," Jordan responded, thinking his request was perfectly valid. "And if you don't agree to treating Mulwray for ARDS, I'd recommend giving him the next injection now - hopefully that will boost the strand enough to aid his recovery. Then he needs to rest... preferably heavily sedated." He had a suspicion that Brennan would try to avoid sleeping in favor of arguing.  
  
"Very well. Give him the next injection, and I'll have somebody get you approval for your tests. In the meantime, however, you aren't to treat him for anything." He glanced at his watch. "I'm sure you'll keep me apprised," he added as he turned to leave. There was another situation that required his attention.  
  
-----  
  
Jesse prepared himself for a fight as the three men appeared on the path in front of him. He'd tipped off Proxy Blue about somebody with mutant powers who jogged in the park every morning. True to form, the GSA was predictably checking out the lead.  
  
Turning, he sprinted off the path and they fell into stride along with him. When they managed to maneuver themselves into positions where they flanked him, Jesse stopped running and took a deep breath. As the first man moved in, he ghosted and dashed straight through him.  
  
However, the other two quickly moved to keep him blocked in, surrounding him and moving in sync so that he stayed between them. Returning to normal mass momentarily, Jesse took a quick breath before phasing out once more so that he couldn't be hit.  
  
One of the GS agents sprayed him with something similar to a mini fire extinguisher, effectively keeping him from being able to move while ghosted. Jesse was smart enough to abort that approach, and he gave up on phasing out all together, rubbing his arms as a shiver wracked his body. They'd been expecting a molecular with his abilities. In fact, the more Jesse thought about, he realized they knew exactly what they were doing. As if they'd been specifically prepared for him.  
  
Crap. Eckhart was apparently one step ahead and had planned for Mutant X to attempt something. Jesse had just been set up by his own trap. He lifted his hand and spoke into his ring. "Actually, Shal, I've decided I could use some backup on this one."  
  
He smiled awkwardly at the three agents. "So, you guys wanna just call this match a draw and we go our separate ways now?" he asked as they circled him once more.  
  
Then they charged in simultaneously, and Jesse immediately massed, readying himself to take them on. He knocked one of them back, but the other two grabbed him and one held a rag over his mouth and waited for him to breathe.  
  
Finally unable to hold his breath any longer, Jesse struggled as he shifted back to normal density. He was instantly punched hard in the stomach and he instinctively gasped. He inhaled enough of a breath for him to phase out and pass through the hand, but the air had been tainted with whatever drug had been on the rag. His head swam with dizziness, and he collapsed, landing normal - and unconscious - on the ground.  
  
Picking up their captive, the men dragged him to the parking lot and dropped him face-first onto the asphalt as Eckhart stepped out of one of the cars. He drew a gun and aimed it at the young man's back, not hesitating as he pulled the trigger.  
  
As blood slowly began to soak Jesse's shirt, Eckhart motioned to his men and they tossed the limp body into one of the vans, not bothering to check if he was even still alive. It didn't matter either way; Adam would still want him back.  
  
Eckhart put away the gun before purposefully dropping a card on the ground. Then he got back into his car and slammed the door.  
  
-----  
  
Shalimar made it to the parking lot at opposite side of park just in time to see a small train of black vehicles pulling out. She ran after them but gave up after a few paces. Her bike was in the other lot, and she didn't stand a chance on foot.  
  
"Damn it!" she cursed loudly, shoving back her hair as she watched the GSA disappear from sight. She activated her com-link. "Adam, you there?"  
  
"Yes. But Jesse's signal just vanished. You should be standing at his last location." There was a pause. "Shalimar, what's happening?"  
  
Looking down, she spotted a white business card on the pavement and bent to pick it up. The word "Adam" was scrawled on the front, and turning it over, she discovered "go fish" written in deep red on the back.  
  
She silently swore that she'd kill Eckhart for this. They'd taken Jesse. "Adam, he's gone."  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
And now I have final projects that I need to work on, so don't hold your breath waiting for the next update. Sorry. 


	20. Games

As Shalimar stormed into Sanctuary, she yanked off her bike helmet and then kicked it across the room. "This sucks!"  
  
Having heard her enter, Adam went to meet her and calmly attempted to get her to settle down. "Are you hurt?" he asked gently.  
  
She shook her head, then sat down on the dojo steps. A wave of blonde locks covered her face as she plopped her chin into her hands. "We'll need to go back later to get the Mustang," she said, sounding defeated.  
  
As he sat down beside her, Adam wrapped his arm around her and rubbed her shoulder. "We'll get him back," he assured her.  
  
"How?" she mumbled, looking over at him through a mess of hair before shoving it angrily back. It didn't stay tucked behind her ear and proceeded to fall across her face once more. She jumped up and started to pace. "The same way we got back Brennan and Emma?"  
  
Adam ignored the spiteful tone, knowing she was upset. He was about to say something when the computer started beeping. He quickly got up to check the alert. "Jesse's ring just went active," he told Shalimar who was now staring over his shoulder. "I'll get a trace."  
  
As soon as the location appeared on the map, Adam pounded his fist against the keyboard. Shalimar took things one step farther by completely ripping the keyboard free and slinging it into the wall. Then she punched her fist into the screen.  
  
"Damn him. This isn't a game!" she yelled. Jesse's signal had been reading as located in the same river where Eckhart had dumped the other two rings.  
  
"Shalimar, calm down," Adam said softly, trying to sooth the feral before she decided to break anything else.  
  
"Adam, HE HAS JESSE!" She couldn't hide the fear in her voice as she pulled the business card from her pocket and passed it to him. "That bastard wrote that message in blood, and for all we know, it's Jesse's."  
  
Heading to the lab, Adam decided to run a DNA test on the blood. Shalimar followed but hung back while waiting for the results of the scan. She wasn't sure she wanted to know.  
  
When Adam got a 92% positive match, he flicked off the display before Shalimar could read it also. "It's not from Jesse," Adam told her. Eckhart had obviously known Jesse was a plant and had been prepared in advance. He didn't think it would be a good idea right now to tell her the blood was Brennan's.  
  
-----  
  
Jordan subconsciously rubbed his bruised cheek as he walked into the lab where DeLauro was adamantly refusing to undress. Her new handler wasn't taking her attitude well and shoved her back against the chair. She fell into it but attempted to slap him as he moved to lock the restraints. Failing to notice Jordan's presence, the man hit her right back then grabbed her shirt and started to tug it up. Since he was now bending over her and hadn't yet secured her feet, Emma quickly slammed her knee up right between his legs.  
  
As the man cursed, Jordan grimaced in empathy for him. He was almost happy Emma had gone for the face when she'd kicked him. He sighed before clearing his throat to get their attention. Her handler grabbed her arm before looking up. Emma noticed him also and gave him the finger with her free hand. Jordan groaned. Lovely girl.  
  
"I'll handle this," he told the guard, dismissing him. The brat was his responsibility now, so he'd just have to find a way to deal with her. The man glowered at her for a moment before eventually exiting the room.  
  
"You again." Emma glared at Jordan, fully prepared to be as much of a bitch as possible. She stood, not about to let him know she was actually frightened. "Aren't you supposed to be sticking pins in your Brennan voodoo doll?"  
  
Sighing once more, Jordan had to keep himself from rolling his eyes. "Sit," he said firmly, motioning to the lab chair. She reluctantly obeyed. "Here's the deal: you keep your clothes, and my face - or any other part of my anatomy - avoids an encore introduction to your foot."  
  
"Fine," she replied stiffly, crossing her arms over her chest.  
  
He glanced at her hands. "The restraints are nonnegotiable." She lowered her arms, figuring that was the best offer she was going to get, and he locked down her wrists. "Thank you."  
  
She watched him for a while, still wondering why he wasn't with Brennan. "Is he going to be okay?" she asked a bit more sheepishly than she wanted to sound. She was afraid of losing him, of the torture driving him mad.  
  
"He's resting. He'll be fine." Jordan felt almost guilty about his answer. The strand was indeed healing him, but he kept judging Brennan's condition based solely on physical damage. Emma was clearly concerned about him emotionally as well.  
  
"He's going to go insane, isn't he?" She spoke quietly now, the defiance gone from her tone. She wanted an honest answer. "I don't need to be able to read him to see it."  
  
Jordan ducked his head and turned away, avoiding her intense gaze. He grabbed a clipboard and started scribbling something down on it. "That was never our intention."  
  
"So it's just a side effect?" she snapped, but for some reason her voice came out more sad than angry. "How can you kill him and not expect that... that there will be problems?"  
  
His pen paused on the page as he glanced over at her. "I don't think Mr. Eckhart considered psychological trauma when he devised the tests."  
  
"How many more of these tests will there be?" she asked nervously before glaring icily at him to hide her fear.  
  
"That's classified information." He set down the clipboard and placed his fingers on her neck. "Hold still so I can take your pulse."  
  
"Adam is going to make you pay for every ounce of pain you put him through," she threatened. But she knew even if that were true, it wouldn't matter if Brennan wasn't okay. The thought of vengeance didn't do much to cheer her up.  
  
"You're scared," Jordan commented.  
  
Emma attempted to keep up her act, but it was pointless with him monitoring her so thoroughly. She might as well have been hooked up to a lie detector. "Do you plan to torture me like you've done to him?"  
  
Retrieving the clipboard once more, he made a note of something Emma couldn't read. "You look a bit flushed and are running a slight fever."  
  
"I'm fine," she replied in confusion.  
  
He glared at her in annoyance. "No, you're not." He quickly stuck her with a needle he'd been concealing. "There's been a nasty strain of influenza going around, and you might have caught it. Your last scan didn't show anything, so I'm calling it inconclusive and ordering a full set of blood tests."  
  
Emma stared at the small prick mark. "You just infected me, you son of a bitch!"  
  
"Don't raise your voice," he instantly warned. "We can't proceed if your immune system is weak. However, the tests will show that you've merely developed a slight cold. After a couple days, you'll be fine."  
  
She frowned deeply, trying to figure out what he was doing. "You're stalling."  
  
He gathered the supplies he'd need to take a blood sample. "Mulwray is in no condition to undergo the next procedure. He needs to rest."  
  
"What do I have to do with that?" she inquired as he released one of her hands and prepared to draw some blood.  
  
"You're DNA is going to be altered to match his. You shouldn't suffer many ill effects, but for him the process will be very... invasive." He finished his task and stuck a Band-Aid on her arm. "There are still several more experiments Eckhart wants to do first, but I'm hoping this will push back his entire timeline."  
  
Emma glanced up at him. They wanted to give her more powers? Eckhart must be pretty confident in his ability to control her, otherwise why not use one of his 'freak of the week' henchmen as test subject zero? Was it dangerous enough for none of his goons to have volunteered? And giving new powers to enemies probably wouldn't lead to her and Brennan ever being let go. Then of course there was the question of what exactly was Mehler's motive in all this. She finally settled for a simple, "Why?"  
  
Hesitating, Jordan studied her expression. That was a loaded question. He couldn't see any reason why Eckhart would want to make her an elemental. What was the need for that if mutancy was such a bad thing? The only explanation was that the plan was to use Messiah in its purest form, not break it down to make vaccines. And Brennan's power would allow for revival after death. Anyone with access to both his ability and also the strand would hold the key to immortality.  
  
But Mr. Eckhart wasn't the kind of man who'd seek such a thing, so there must have been other perfectly logical reasons for these experiments. He scribbled out a label and attached it to Emma's blood sample. Her question might have also been referring to why he seemed to be helping Brennan, and Jordan could no more easily answer that. He honestly wasn't certain.  
  
"It's in the best interest of the experiment," he eventually replied and didn't elaborate further. There was a part of him that was beginning to wonder if Brennan was correct in the things he said. The task of transferring his power to somebody else would practically require an autopsy. Was he right to believe that Eckhart intended to permanently kill him?  
  
-----  
  
Jesse slowly drifted toward consciousness as he became aware of the pain. His entire body ached, the agony seeming to emanate out from its source at his back. He forced himself to blink open his eyes, then he instantly closed them again.  
  
"No," he whispered faintly before daring to look at his surroundings once more. He was in the heart of Genomex, placed in the center of a ring of stasis pods. At least he wasn't in one of those pods, he tried to comfort himself.  
  
However, his current situation didn't leave him much better off. His hands had been cuffed behind him and then pulled back and upwards where the chain was locked to something. The position was horribly uncomfortable, keeping him on his knees since he was unable to raise or lower his arms, preventing both lying down or standing. He bowed his head to ease the tension before shifting position so that he could better support himself and not leave all his weight on his strained arms. The sensation of pins and needles tormented his legs when he moved them, and he wondered how long he'd been left like this.  
  
The floor was also sticky, and it took Jesse a moment to realize he was kneeling in blood. He could only assume it was his own. In fact, the blood seemed to have made a trail down from his back. Hissing in pain, he gave up on trying to see the wound. What the hell had happened? Had Eckhart literally stabbed him in the back? While he'd been out cold? That was low even for the GSA.  
  
Raising his head, he glanced around as a creepy sensation overtook him. There weren't any voices or sounds of any kind. The building seemed deserted, and plastic sheets draped the walls. "Hello?" Jesse ventured to call out, his throat dry.  
  
Nobody responded and he looked up again. Several posters littered the walls, and one of the sheets had apparently fallen to the floor and was almost close enough for him to reach. Shifting, he carefully slid one of his legs to the side, attempting to snag the paper with his foot. He managed to touch it with his toe and leaned farther. He slipped and let out a cry at the flare which shot through the muscles of his back.  
  
The last thing he needed was to start the bleeding again. Right now, all the blood seemed fairly old and dry. Actually, he supposed he should be grateful he'd been tied in a position that kept his back elevated. It had probably kept him from losing a lot more blood.  
  
Resuming his task, he eased the page toward him until he'd slid it close enough for him to be able to read. It was a notice. Apparently Genomex had been closed for renovations and would open again for normal business in two weeks.  
  
"BRENNAN... EMMA..." Jesse yelled with a tone of uncertainty, praying for an answer.  
  
Yet again, he was met by only silence. Gripping the chain of his handcuffs, he wrapped his fingers around as much of it as was possible, then attempted phasing out, hoping to take the chain with him and pass it through whatever it had been secured to. It was too tight around his wrists for him to think that at least part of it wouldn't ghost with him.  
  
He was screaming before he noticed that he'd even opened his mouth. Dropping his head, he choked down his sobs at the backlash of pain inflicted by the governor.  
  
"Big mistake, Eckhart!" he shouted angrily. "Big one!"  
  
The echo of his words seemed to taunt him as it bounced off the abandoned walls. He sagged against his binds despite the action causing his arms to ache. There wasn't much point in calling out; nobody would hear him. Closing his eyes, he let the pain pull him back toward unconsciousness. He could sleep now since escape was impossible. He wasn't even with his friends - he'd completely failed them.  
  
And now he had been left alone to eventually die.  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
Only one week left until finals are over, so bear with me a little longer, okay? My writing should improve when I'm not so swamped.  
  
And, Cyndi, e-mail me! I lost your addy and haven't seen you on IRC lately, but I figure you'll be reading this. I miss you and your wacky ways of conquering writer's block. *grin* 


	21. Heroes

The haze of sleep slowly left him, but Brennan once more didn't wish to wake. His sedated sleep had been dreamless and peaceful. If he allowed himself to open his eyes, he'd be confronted with a reality he couldn't face. Instead of being home and safe in his own bed, he was lying on a table in some lab, strapped down, alone, and helpless.  
  
If he woke up, he thought he might cry. He was so afraid, and he hated being made to feel weak, powerless to control the situation he now found himself in. He didn't want to spend any more moments in fear, wondering when he'd be put through another test... wondering if the next round of torture would leave his body dead yet again. He wasn't even certain how many times he'd crossed that line already. Was it only once, or had it happened half a dozen times?  
  
He didn't want to be a lab rat any longer. He wanted to get out of here and kick some ass while doing so. He wanted to shoot hoops with Jesse or spar with Shalimar. He wanted pizza and beer and KFC. He wanted anything edible. He wanted to wear his own clothes and not be confronted by all white walls. He wanted to know what it would be like to hold Emma in his arms as something more than a friend.  
  
He was scared and wanted Adam to take him home. He just plain wanted.  
  
This fear wasn't him, he told himself. Brennan Mulwray wasn't frightened by anything or anyone. And he most certainly would not be afraid of Eckhart. Eckhart was merely a man. He might be able to physically hurt him, but Eckhart didn't have the power to make him cry. Nobody ever would.  
  
Taking a deep breath and steeling himself, Brennan opened his eyes. He'd face another day in this place. And he wouldn't allow them to change or break him.  
  
-----  
  
Noticing that Brennan had come around, Jordan moved to his side. Brennan said nothing, so he spoke first. "I gave you another injection. It was enough to keep you from getting any worse." He gave him his best reassuring smile. "How's your breathing?"  
  
Brennan felt fine. "Why didn't you just let me die?" he asked bluntly.  
  
Jordan stared down at him. "Contrary to whatever you believe, Mulwray, I don't want to see you dead."  
  
"You'd rather just keep torturing me," Brennan replied. Death might actually be preferable. "Tell me something, is there a way to reverse what's been done to me?"  
  
Frowning, Jordan drew back. "No. After the next injection, the process will be complete."  
  
Brennan didn't bother to follow him with his eyes and settled for staring at the ceiling. "So it isn't even possible for me to die?"  
  
"I didn't say that," Jordan replied then paused. "You feel like stretching your legs?"  
  
It made sense that Eckhart would have a kill-switch. "Then just kill me and get it over with." He half meant it. He looked over at Jordan before sighing and nodding in answer to his question.  
  
Jordan began undoing the restraints. "I already told you I have no intention of seeing you dead. I don't enjoy watching you be hurt." Yet he'd been practically giddy when writing his last report. Jordan chased that thought aside. He was capable of seeing the end result without condoning the methods, although now he wasn't certain about the result either.  
  
"You're the only one," Brennan mumbled, seeming to accept that Jordan was telling the truth. He sat up and rubbed his wrists.  
  
This time, Jordan actually believed him. Everyone else here got a high off causing pain in the name of science. It was addictive. "For as long as I can remember, I've wanted to be him," Jordan confessed. "Eckhart was like a god to me. He's a genius."  
  
"Bathroom?" Brennan requested, standing and then allowing his hands to be cuffed. Jordan motioned to the door and they started walking.  
  
"You seriously need a new role model," Brennan added as they entered the hallway. "Why can't you be normal and worship an athlete or a movie star? Somebody who just looks pretty but has never actually accomplished anything."  
  
"Why is it that when I talk to you, I see evil in him?" Jordan asked quietly, but he already knew the answer. Whenever he talked to Brennan, he couldn't distance himself. He was having conversations with a person, not a guinea pig. Eckhart never noticed the distinction.  
  
Since there was nobody else around, Brennan felt it was safe to talk. "Maybe you've just seen the light. Face it, kid, you're president of the Lex Luthor fan club."  
  
Jordan stopped and shoved open the door to the bathroom. "And who do you idolize? Your Adam is no better."  
  
Brennan entered the bathroom and Jordan followed. "Perhaps once. And I know I still doubt him based on his past, but I shouldn't. I have to believe that people can change. If they don't, where would that leave me?" He scanned the room for any possible escape routes, but there were no windows or conveniently placed air vents that were just the right size to climb through.  
  
He glanced over at Jordan. "Is it really necessary for you to guard me while I pee?" Jordan hesitantly took off his handcuffs and stepped outside. Brennan heard him lean against the door.  
  
"Alright. From now on, I only admire David Duchovny," Jordan said through the door. "Searching for the truth."  
  
"Didn't he do porn before the X-Files?" Brennan called back. Just out of curiosity, he searched for cameras and then wound up an electrical charge in his hands. They'd forgotten to reactivate his governor after drowning him, and still nobody had noticed. This would have been the perfect chance to make his break, except that he really did need to pee.  
  
He could hear the grin in Jordan's voice. "Hey, you just said not to judge people by their pasts. Besides, he fits your role model requirements in that he's a good-looking actor who has never accomplished anything along the lines of winning a Nobel Prize or solving world hunger."  
  
"Why not Nicholas Lea?" Brennan asked, finishing his business.  
  
"Didn't he play a bad guy?"  
  
Shrugging, Brennan moved to wash his hands. "No. His character was trying to save the world also. He wasn't evil, just misunderstood." He rejoined Jordan.  
  
"How many episodes of the X-Files have you seen?" Jordan laughed, shaking his head. "Krycek killed Mulder's father, ya know."  
  
"Really? Okay fine, David Duchovny it is then." He paused, making sure his hands were completely dry. His manipulation of Jordan seemed to be going well, and he wondered if attempting to run was worth the risk of losing it. He had the option of just zapping him right now and going it on his own. "Look, I'm sorry about that whole strangling you thing before. You were kinda in my way."  
  
Jordan bought the apology without suspicion. "Then I suppose I'm sorry for the almost letting you be autopsied thing. You were kinda dead. If the situation ever happens again, I'll make certain full blood tests are run first. That will show if the strand is still stable."  
  
Brennan seemed uncomfortable for a while but then nodded. He'd give the kid a chance. "So, you think we can be friends again?" He held out his hand to Jordan.  
  
"We never were friends," Jordan replied honestly.  
  
"Oh, right. In that case, arch enemies again?" he joked. Then he waited. If Jordan didn't take the bait, Brennan was done playing games and would end their relationship right here.  
  
Jordan took his hand. "Sure. I've never been anybody's evil nemesis before."  
  
They shook hands before Brennan let himself be cuffed again. Escape would be more likely to succeed with an ally. And Jordan was coming around. He'd just referred to himself as the bad guy.  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
The next part is already in the hands of the beta-readers. 


	22. Tests

Everybody give a round of applause to my beautiful beta-readers who worked on this chapter over Christmas. They really are wonderful.  
  
And HAPPY HOLIDAYS to all of you!  
  
-----  
  
-----  
  
Brennan let out a long sigh as he rinsed the last of the shampoo lather from his hair. Damn, it felt good to be clean. They'd been running a series of physical tests for the past Lord-only-knew how long, and more than anything he was glad to be allowed a chance to wash away the sweat, blood, feel of unfriendly hands, and whatever else was on his body. They'd tested his stamina, checked his weight, and even tested his eyesight.  
  
He tilted his head back and funneled some of the lukewarm water into his mouth and let it run down his throat. He knew full well that was screwing up their dehydration test, but he quite frankly didn't care. Next, he splashed his face, then brushed his teeth using his finger and gargled.  
  
Fetching the soap once more, he decided to scrub behind his ears, followed by carefully washing between his toes. He was determined to make this shower last as long as possible. He looked over at the security camera for a second before resuming ignoring it. He was half tempted to break into a chorus of "Singin' in the Rain" just to let Eckhart know he wouldn't be intimidated that easily. Having an audience wasn't about to stop him from enjoying water that wasn't trying to drown him.  
  
When he got around to soaping up the bottoms of his feet for the third time, the water shut itself off. Apparently somebody had finally decided to give his bath a time limit. Bastards. But he merely glanced over at the camera and gave whoever was watching a smile. "You think I could get a razor in here?" he called, motioning that he wanted to shave.  
  
The door was opened and a towel and clean clothes were tossed into the room.  
  
Sighing, Brennan grabbed the towel and dried off before pulling on the fresh clothes. As he started to work at toweling his hair, his handler entered and cuffed his hands behind his back. "Hey, I'm still soggy," he complained.  
  
"Let's go," his handler instructed, shoving him in the direction of the door.  
  
Brennan grudgingly walked with him. With his hair wet, he was too damp to shock the guy. Brennan grinned at the mental picture. Electrocuted goon. Hee hee. Yep, it was almost worth shocking himself a bit in the process. But alas, he needed to wait until he actually stood a chance at escaping. Damn.  
  
After a couple minutes, they arrived at yet another lab and Brennan was handed over to Jordan once more. The young man checked his watch. "Forty- five minutes to take a shower. You're as bad as my sister. I thought you elementals didn't like water."  
  
"We don't," Brennan replied, shaking his head and managing to splatter Jordan who didn't seem amused. "And I'll put Emma up against your sister any day. Besides, if Eckhart can afford to put an indoor lake in the other room, he shouldn't have a problem with the water bill for my shower. You think I can get a rubber ducky next time?"  
  
"You really are impossible to work with," commented Jordan.  
  
Brennan strolled over to the counter and snatched the clipboard that was sitting there. He had difficulty trying to read it while holding it behind his back due to the handcuffs. "So what does Eckhart have on the agenda for us this afternoon?"  
  
"Pretty much the same as earlier," Jordan replied, taking the board from him and motioning for him to sit. Jordan switched his restraints to those on the chair. "He offered to put me in charge of your treatments," he added after a moment.  
  
Brennan just stared at him and waited for him to continue. Was he really lucky enough to get Jordan placed in control of what tests were done to him?  
  
"Apparently he thinks I'm developing a backbone, and he seems to like that." The other doctor had been dismissed after his failure to predict Brennan's most recent revival. Jordan had been the only one with complete faith in the strand. "But I said no."  
  
And there was the predictable smashing of Brennan's hopes. "Why?"  
  
"My judgment has become impaired where you're concerned," Jordan said. Brennan assumed that was his answer, but then he continued. "I've requested to be responsible for DeLauro instead."  
  
Brennan had asked him to look after her. For a moment, he felt relief, but it quickly dissipated. "Why does Emma matter when the tests are only being done on me?"  
  
As he stared at Jordan, he felt his earlier fear creep back into him. They couldn't be doing tests on his Emma. That was unthinkable. He swore to himself that nobody would hurt her. He'd stop them.  
  
Jordan studied Brennan's expression - denial mixed with anger. He didn't like the fact that Brennan's rage seemed directed at him instead of Eckhart for the moment. However, he had just told him that he'd personally be the one responsible for what was done to his friend. "She's being used for a different experiment. I'll make certain she isn't injured in any way."  
  
That was still a far cry from her being let go. Brennan decided he might just have to make his run without waiting for Jordan to switch sides. He'd never forgive himself if he played it safe while Eckhart was allowed to have things done to Emma. "What exactly is the experiment?" he eventually asked.  
  
"You know I'm not supposed to tell you that," Jordan replied sympathetically. He had told the girl, however, and she was likely to inform him. He wondered why he bothered with protocol at all.  
  
Brennan had figured as much. "Are you going to be her new handler, or is she still stuck with that other dumbass prick?"  
  
"Her what?" Jordan raised his eyebrows at the term "handler." Whoever he was, Brennan didn't seem very fond of him.  
  
"You know," Brennan said, "the guys who fetch us and drag us around. Mine's the big ugly one with the switchblade." He cringed at the memory of being impaled.  
  
"Oh." Jordan gave him a half smile. "I'm afraid I'm only her doctor. The dragging around will still left to the *other* dumbass prick. But she's more likely to hurt him than he is her."  
  
"He'd better not. Emma is the sweetest, most caring person I've ever met. Anybody who hurts her is going to answer to me." And that threat included Jordan. Brennan stared at him again, and for the first time, he noticed the faint bruising on his cheek. "Whatever happened to you anyway?"  
  
Jordan touched his face. "As it turns out, your sweet little Emma is quite a piece of work."  
  
Emma'd managed to hit him? Brennan was fairly impressed. She'd always hated being the most passive of the Mutant X group, but she was dealing it out with the best of them now. That was his girl. He couldn't help a proud smile. "When did Emma have a chance to punch you?"  
  
"Kicked, actually," Jordan corrected.  
  
Brennan stifled his laugh. That mark had been made from Emma's foot? Jordan was a fairly tall guy. Brennan grinned. "I love flexible women."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Nothing," he said quickly. "She grows on you."  
  
"Oh yeah, she's a real peach," Jordan replied none too enthusiastically. He started to say something else, but then another doctor entered the lab and Jordan stopped talking.  
  
Brennan watched as the two exchanged a few words and then Jordan left, apparently relieved from babysitting duty. Brennan frowned, knowing it was time for more testing.  
  
-----  
  
They'd done an EKG, MRI, CAT scan, and several other miscellaneous acronyms that Brennan couldn't keep track of before Jordan returned several hours later. Brennan wondered if he'd been with Emma during that time.  
  
"Are we finished?" he asked.  
  
It was the new doctor who replied. "No."  
  
Brennan rolled his eyes at the short answer. "What else is there?"  
  
"We'll be doing a bone marrow biopsy," Jordan informed him. "But after that, you're done for the day."  
  
Brennan didn't like the sound of that. "Aren't those things supposed to hurt like hell?"  
  
"You'll be given a local anesthetic and muscle relaxants," Jordan explained. "I'll be assisting, so I can stay with you the entire time and talk you through the procedure."  
  
Brennan stared at him. He thought Jordan was actually displaying a trace of genuine compassion. He'd definitely succeeded in getting under his skin. He felt a tiny pang of guilt at the fact that if it were necessary for escape, he still wouldn't hesitate to harm the young man.  
  
-----  
  
"Do you feel this?" the doctor asked as he pressed on Brennan's hipbone.  
  
With a small shake of his head, Brennan responded, "No." He thought his entire left leg might be numb. He thanked God for small favors. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw the doctor toss what looked like some kind of wipe into the trash. Jordan had said they were going to cleanse the area with a betadine solution. He hadn't even felt it. He decided he was in love with Xylocaine or whatever it was called. Local anesthetics were very good things.  
  
Somebody gave his shoulder a quick squeeze and he knew it to be Jordan again. A hand was then placed on the small of his back to still him. "We're going to start now," Jordan informed him. "You need to take a deep breath and hold it as the needle is inserted."  
  
Sucking in a huge breath, Brennan closed his eyes and waited. His heart was racing. He wondered if he'd only feel the unpleasant pressure he'd come to expect from the other injections. But he knew this was very different. He tried to brace himself for the pain.  
  
"Relax," Jordan instructed, and Brennan knew he must have tensed up. "You'll likely feel some discomfort as the cells are aspirated - such as a pulling or drawing feeling down the leg - but no real pain."  
  
Brennan obeyed, then he felt the thick tip of the needle pierce his skin and he tensed again briefly before forcing himself to relax once more. The pain was only slight, hardly noticeable actually. He could feel the presence of the needle in his body, but it didn't actually hurt.  
  
Then the needle moved farther into his hip and he felt a twinge of what he'd consider real pain. He tightened his hands into fists and wished he wasn't restrained. He was naked, tied to a cold table, and had a needle in his backside. God, this sucked.  
  
The doctor seemed to be taking his sweet time, and Brennan's tolerance for this was decreasing every second. Finally, he heard the doctor tell Jordan the needle was fully inserted. Then Jordan walked around the table and stooped so that he was eye level with Brennan.  
  
"You doing okay?"  
  
"Not really," Brennan forced out between breaths. The pain was bearable, but it still hurt.  
  
"We're going to need to puncture your hipbone as soon as we're done aspirating the cells so that we can take a small bone chip," Jordan explained slowly. "It is going to hurt a bit."  
  
Brennan muttered a curse as Jordan stood back up. It was never good when a doctor told you something was going to hurt.  
  
He felt more pressure applied to the needle as the doctor pushed harder. Then he felt the tip of the needle actually graze his bone. He clenched his jaw as the pain increased. The pressure suddenly multiplied and he was certain the bone had just been punctured. He gasped before gritting his teeth at the flare in his side. This sucked! He tried to hold back his scream.  
  
Apparently noticing the change in his breathing, Jordan released one of the restraints and took his hand. He knelt so that he was where Brennan could see him again. "You're doing well. We'll be done soon."  
  
Brennan squeezed his hand tightly as the pain got even worse. He felt like the damn doctor had switched to a blunt butcher knife and was trying to remove the entire bone. His breathing grew faster and Jordan tightened his grip on his hand. He was perspiring now and began rolling his head from side to side, still refusing to cry out.  
  
Jordan rubbed up and down along his arm, gently attempting to soothe him. Brennan tensed his muscles and dug his nails into Jordan's palm. "Stop," he choked out.  
  
"It'll just be a little while longer," Jordan said softly.  
  
Brennan squeezed his eyes closed before finally screaming. They really needed to stop. As he cried out once more, he accidentally let a small electrical surge pass into Jordan's hand. Brennan immediately tightened his grip further when the other man tried to pull back. "Don't," he pleaded, holding him firmly enough to leave nasty bruises. If Jordan told on him, there was no hope.  
  
He prepared himself to shock the young man again at the first sign of him giving him away. He'd run now if he had to. Except that he couldn't run; there was too much pain. He'd need to deliver a strong enough shock to actually kill Jordan. Then he'd simply collapse, and it would look like he'd fainted. If the other doctor didn't realize it was Brennan's doing, it would buy him a small amount of precious time. With the needle no longer inside his body and the doctor distracted, Brennan could at least try to escape.  
  
When it became clear that Jordan was dead, there would have already been enough confusion for Brennan to make his move. He could take out the other man easily before he stood a chance of calling for backup. And when more of Eckhart's goons showed up, Brennan would hopefully be well on his way. If he left two bodies on the floor, the reinforcements would be delayed by the need to perform CPR. Either that or they'd leave them to become permanently dead. But that was a chance Brennan was willing to take.  
  
He currently had one hand free. That was all he needed. The only thing left was for him to gather the courage that was required for him to be able to actually use his power to kill. Was he capable of taking a life?  
  
Jordan's life. The one person who'd shown him even a trace of kindness. Now the man who would become his betrayer. Without the governor being active, he stood a chance. If he could only get as far as reaching Emma, she could use her gift to call for help. It had come down to kill or be killed.  
  
And he needed to kill Jordan. But that thought instantly disappeared as the needle moved once more. The slight pause his screaming had caused was over and the other doctor had resumed his work.  
  
Brennan cried again from the raw pain. Jordan instinctively responded by resuming to coach him. "Deep breaths, remember? Come on, you're doing good."  
  
Jordan rubbed the back of his hand encouragingly, never removing the contact. Then he spoke to the other doctor. "Stop for a minute. He isn't breathing."  
  
The needle held still once more and Brennan gasped. He didn't want a break. He wanted this over. "Get the damn thing out!" he ordered.  
  
"Brennan... stay with me, okay?" Jordan said, noticing that Brennan looked ill.  
  
Brennan was afraid he might be sick. He was certain he was either going to throw up or pass out. He hardly realized that Jordan had called him by his first name instead of referring to him as Mulwray. All he cared about was that the needle was finally withdrawn from his body. Then he blacked out.  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
Next time, back to Jesse, Shal, and Adam. Promise.  
  
Also, how many people are still reading this now that it's getting incredibly long? And do you prefer short stories when reading fanfic? I'm just curious. 


	23. Fishes

Sorry about the delay in posting. I took a break from MX and writing and spent a while doing paintings for the LOTR fandom. Arwen is simply amazing to draw. I love the dresses. But anyway, I'll try to find time for doing both.  
  
So here's the next chapter, and I apologize for writing it when I was asleep. Hopefully it's not too bad.  
  
-----  
  
-----  
  
As Shalimar was getting the Double Helix fired up, she suddenly found herself locked out of the controls.  
  
"Would you mind telling me your plan?" Adam's voice said through the com- link.  
  
She huffed in agitation, then exited the Helix so that she could talk to Adam face to face. "Plan?" she repeated. "I was thinking break into Genomex, wreak some havoc, and then play it by ear from there."  
  
She stared at him a moment longer before sidestepping around him. "I'll just take one of the cars," she called over her shoulder.  
  
Adam instantly blocked her path again, grabbing her arm. "Don't do this."  
  
She flashed her eyes feral at him. "Try to stop me."  
  
Letting go of her arm, Adam walked back and boarded the Helix. Curious, Shalimar followed and found him releasing the lock on the controls. He then sat down in the pilot seat. "Don't do this alone," he rephrased.  
  
-----  
  
Voices from the outside world slowly started to penetrate Brennan's thoughts, but he pushed them away. He was tired, and it would be so easy to simply slip from unconsciousness into sleep. There was no need for him to wake up. He didn't ever want to wake.  
  
The waking world was only labs, and doctors, and tests... and fear. Brennan was fed up with all of it. He wanted to sleep, give up, and stop worrying about what came next. Stop worrying about Eckhart and Jordan, and why Adam hadn't rescued him, and what if something had happened to Jesse or Shalimar because otherwise they'd be here, and what were the tests that were being done to his Emma...  
  
Not Eckhart's Emma, or Jordan's, or even Adam's. *His* Emma. His since the moment she walked into his life and asked him to help her, and everything changed. Before she'd ever heard of Adam or Mutant X, she found him. Him. She touched him, saw into him, maybe even brainwashed him... Because he'd thrown away his old life for her. Her, this girl he'd never laid eyes on before, this girl that bumped into him and suddenly he knew her, this incredible girl that shifted his entire world around...  
  
Surely she must have brainwashed him, used her gift on him, altered his mind... Because everything was different after her. And even right now, it was worth it. He'd willingly be found by her all over again.  
  
Emma. How could he sleep without knowing if she was safe? This wasn't only about him. Sleeping would be selfish. He was supposed to be protecting her, not praying for oblivion. What if they hurt her while he slept? He'd never forgive himself. He already hated himself, felt worthless.  
  
He forced himself to stay alert and not return to sleep. But he kept his eyes closed, and tried to steady his breathing into an evenness that resembled sleep. He'd lie awake until the voices in the room with him left. Then he'd go find Emma. And help her.  
  
-----  
  
Shalimar crumpled the flyer in her hand, not liking the looks of this. An abandoned Genomex was even creepier than one swarming with GS agents. She yanked some construction tape out of her way. "Adam, I'm going in."  
  
"Watch yourself," his voice replied over her com-link. "I'm picking up a single heat signature inside. It's faint but might be a person."  
  
She flashed her eyes feral. "Somebody's home?"  
  
"Hard to tell," Adam answered. "But this doesn't feel right, so be careful."  
  
She nodded as she easily entered the building. "I'm always careful, Adam."  
  
As she moved farther into Genomex, she stayed cautious, her feral senses alert. Something was definitely wrong here. And then she froze. She could smell blood. Her promise to be careful was suddenly forgotten and she sprinted forward without watching her back.  
  
"JESSE!" she yelled, catching sight of Adam's heat reading and just knowing who it was. He'd said faint, and the body in front of her wasn't moving.  
  
"You'd better be alive so I can kill you," she whispered quietly as she finally knelt beside him, listening for any trace that he was breathing. Her fingers were already searching for a pulse before she noticed the shallow intake of breath. He was still alive, just unconscious. She quickly hugged him, pressing her cheek against his and realizing that his skin was cool. Her hand was also resting in dried blood.  
  
She automatically brought her hand to her mouth and spoke into her ring. "I've got Jesse; he's hurt, I think he's in shock."  
  
"I want the two of you out of there as fast as possible," Adam replied. "I'm going to generate an electromagnetic pulse, temporarily knock out any security Eckhart might be using. If this is a set up, I'm not losing you as well."  
  
Shalimar nodded before looking for a way to free Jesse. Then she saw something and paused, her eyes falling on an envelope that had been taped above Jesse's hands. It was just out of his reach, and he likely hadn't even seen it if he'd ever been awake. The word "Adam" was clearly printed on it.  
  
Grabbing the envelope, Shalimar ripped it free then tore it open. At first, she thought it was empty, but then she noticed something in the bottom. She turned it over and dumped the contents into her hand. She gaped in disbelief at the small metal key.  
  
"Not a chance," she mumbled to herself as she carefully slid the key into the lock on Jesse's handcuffs. Amazingly enough, the restraints dropped open.  
  
-----  
  
Jesse roused to the feel of hands gently moving over his stomach and chest. He forced open his eyes in confusion. "Shalimar?"  
  
The hands stilled and her face was suddenly staring down at him. "You're awake," she said with obvious relief.  
  
He merely moaned and let his eyes slip shut again. There was nothing to worry about if Shalimar was with him. He was sleepy and felt safe now.  
  
She quickly slid one hand out from under his shirt and cupped his face in her palm. "Jess, stay awake. Jesse!" Her voice was nervous.  
  
He squinted up at her. Why did he need to wake up? And why was her hand underneath his shirt? "What's going on?" He tried to sit and let out a small cry at the stab of pain that shot through his back.  
  
She carefully stilled him. "Try not to move. There's a bullet hole in your back and I'm checking for an exit wound."  
  
Oh right, he'd been tied up in Genomex. He dared to look around. Damn. He still was in Genomex. And had Shal just said bullet wound? "Eckhart shot me?" That really wasn't very nice of him. This had to be a bad dream.  
  
"Adam, there's no exit wound," Shalimar said, shoving her hair behind her ear. "But Jesse's awake."  
  
"Good. Is he lucid?"  
  
Jesse looked for Adam before realizing that his voice had come from Shalimar's com-link. What did she mean no exit wound? There was no way a bullet was actually inside him. He could mass; he was invincible to bullets. He couldn't have been shot. Nope, not shot, no way... He stared at Shalimar as she tried to comfort him.  
  
"I think he's dazed or something. He's lost a lot of blood." She rubbed his arms, helping to warm him and restore circulation. "He's shivering also."  
  
"He's definitely in shock then," Adam remarked, his tone troubled. "Don't move him. I'm on my way."  
  
"Nooo..." Jesse mumbled, the word wavering. Shal was right, he was trembling. He hadn't realized that he was cold. But this wasn't right. Where were the guards? They shouldn't be all alone like this. He wasn't about to be made responsible for Adam falling into a trap. "I can walk."  
  
"Jesse, listen to me," Adam said firmly. "Stay put until I get a chance to see how seriously you're injured."  
  
He pushed himself up and then tried to ignore Shalimar who needed to grab him to keep him from toppling right back down again. His vision blurred momentarily. "What if I'm bait?"  
  
"That's a risk I'm willing--"  
  
"I'm not," Jesse interrupted, cutting Adam off. He'd already royally screwed things up badly enough without luring the only remaining free members of Mutant X into the heart of Genomex. "I'm fine," he insisted.  
  
"Shalimar?" Adam asked, seeking her opinion.  
  
Jesse knew she'd hate being made the deciding vote. Shal wouldn't want to chance moving him before Adam was able to take a look at his back; however, they'd need to get him to Sanctuary one way or another, and that wouldn't happen if Eckhart decided to shoot Adam as well. She was well aware of that.  
  
"I can carry him if I have to," she offered.  
  
Jesse gave her a doubting look as Adam reluctantly agreed. "I'm pretty heavy, Shal."  
  
"You're not heavy, you're my brother," she replied, obviously attempting to relax him as well as herself. "But do you want to try standing?"  
  
As she pulled his arm over her shoulders, he grimaced. "I thought I already was standing." Her expression became concerned once more and he offered her a pained smile. "Don't worry, I'm good."  
  
Carefully, she got him to his feet and they headed back to the Helix. But he found himself allowing her to support more and more of his weight as they went.  
  
-----  
  
When everyone was finally back onboard the Double Helix, Jesse sagged and grabbed the back of one of the seats. Shalimar held him more tightly and Adam also moved to catch him as his knees buckled. Together, they shifted him around to the front of the chair and gently eased him into it.  
  
"Thanks," Jesse managed before biting his lip to stop himself from crying. Walking hadn't been a good idea. Everything was spinning now and he was seeing white sparks.  
  
Adam began thoroughly looking him over as Shalimar hesitantly left his side in order to get them in the air. Stopping his inspection of Jesse, Adam turned to her. "Don't take us back. Just hover."  
  
"Why?" she asked.  
  
After giving Jesse's hand a quick squeeze, Adam went to talk to her. Jesse just closed his eyes and fought against the pain. He felt miserable for causing so much trouble. He was also fairly pissed that Eckhart seemed to have merely thrown him back. "I feel like we're being toyed with," he commented.  
  
Taking the main seat, Adam began checking everything. "You're right. This was too easy. Why would Eckhart just give you back?" He entered a course heading away from Sanctuary, then programmed the autopilot to fly randomly.  
  
Giving him a puzzled look, Shalimar asked, "What are you doing?"  
  
Completing a scan of all channels, Adam frowned. He discovered exactly what he'd been afraid of. "We're broadcasting a signal."  
  
"You think this whole thing was a set-up so that they could tag the Helix?" Shalimar concluded. "That doesn't make sense, Adam. You'd have noticed."  
  
"It's not the Helix that's being tracked," Jesse said slowly, wishing he hadn't been paying attention to the conversation now that he caught on to what Adam was thinking. "It's me."  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
More action is coming up in the next parts. 


	24. Elevations

"Well, Eckhart must have stuck the tag on his clothing, right?" Shalimar demanded of Adam in a panic while staring at Jesse as if she could see right through him and view his back. Yet she didn't want to see the bullet wound. "God, Adam, do not tell that it's..."  
  
Adam nodded, his expression grim. "It must be the bullet."  
  
"No." She forced her gaze back to Adam.  
  
He lightly touched her arm in a gesture of comfort. "Everything will be alright," he assured her, keeping the concern from his voice. "We have two options. Head back to Sanctuary, remove the bullet, and then abandon our home. Or we risk taking Jesse to a hospital."  
  
As he watched Shalimar try not to lose her small grasp on control, Jesse silently cursed himself for being incredibly stupid. He'd been so headstrong about finding Eckhart, and now thanks to his foolishness, Eckhart was using him to find the headquarters of Mutant X.  
  
Refusing to cost them their safe haven, Jesse attempted to stand and protest. As soon as he got to his feet, he collapsed.  
  
"Oh god, Jesse!" Shalimar exclaimed, reaching for him at the same time as Adam. The three all ended up smashing into each other.  
  
Jesse sucked in a sharp breath as he tried to figure out who'd caught him or if maybe he'd just hit the floor. A fresh flare of pain had him instantly squeezing his eyes closed and fighting back tears.  
  
"You can't take me to a hospital without them noticing that I'm... different... and revealing far too much," he argued through gritted teeth. "Eckhart obviously knew that. But I won't let you take me back to Sanctuary, Adam. We're not going to lose everything because of me."  
  
"What other choice do we have?" Shalimar snapped impatiently before quickly softening her tone. Jesse had just been shot. He certainly didn't need her yelling at him. "Can you ghost yourself without phasing the bullet?"  
  
Easier said than done. He shook his head. "I don't think so. It's inside me, Shal." How the hell was he supposed to have enough control to manage that? The only handle he'd been able to get on his power was being able to use it to *prevent* him getting shot. Well, so much for that claim.  
  
She knew. There was a piece of metal imbedded in his body. That wasn't something she'd ever thought she would need to worry about. The others getting shot had always been a threat, but not Jesse. She was torn between wanting to break something and wanting to cry. He'd been shot in the back. Eckhart was scum. She wanted to break him.  
  
Adam still looked grim. "The bullet would phase as well," he stated the obvious. "And it's not worth even trying for danger of merely shifting it deeper."  
  
"How deep is it now?" Jesse asked before taking a deep breath. He could only see one solution. "We have to do this here."  
  
"Onboard the Helix?!" Shalimar exclaimed as if he were crazy. "Jesse, our med kit doesn't have those kinds of supplies. You can't expect us to... Jess, we can't."  
  
"Actually, Shal, we're prepared for almost anything," he said, seeing how worried she was. He could hardly even believe he was suggesting this. "Besides, we don't really have many options here."  
  
"This shouldn't be one of them," Adam said in a firm tone before being met with Jesse's stubborn expression. He sighed. "Alright, lie down. I'll take a look at the wound, but if the bullet is deep, you don't argue and we take you back to Sanctuary."  
  
Jesse carefully lay on his stomach on the floor. "Okay."  
  
Removing his pocketknife, Adam knelt beside Jesse. "This is going to be torture on the knees," he complained while slicing off Jesse's shirt since it was ruined anyway. "Shalimar, turn up the interior lights to full bright and see if you can find a flashlight."  
  
She did as instructed, then sat across from Adam. Turning on the flashlight, she aimed it at Jesse's back so Adam wouldn't be required to work in shadow. She hissed at the sight of the wound. "That has to hurt."  
  
"It's less painful without the commentary," Jesse remarked, not needing to be told how bad it looked.  
  
Eventually satisfied, Adam rubbed Jesse's shoulder to comfort him. "It's not deep. I should be able to get it out. Are you sure about this?"  
  
Jesse was already crying from the pain, but he nodded. "Yes."  
  
"Okay." He turned to Shalimar. "Empty your pockets, look for anything that might be useful. Do you still carry a cigarette lighter?"  
  
While she dumped the contents of her pockets into one of the chairs, Adam got out the medical and repair kits and started setting aside any supplies he thought he might need. Morphine, bandages, needle-nose pliers, his pocketknife...  
  
Returning to Shalimar, he was pleased to see the lighter. But he frowned as he discovered a paper coaster from a bar. "Spike 555-0218," he read aloud. Picking up the lighter, he set the coaster on fire before handing it back to Shalimar.  
  
Tempted to glare at Adam, she instead snuffed out the charred phone number and returned her attention to Jesse as Adam used her lighter to sterilize the tools he'd be using. Then he prepared a shot of morphine.  
  
Shalimar held Jesse's hand as he was given the drug. He was scared and she attempted to sooth him. "It's gonna be okay, Jess."  
  
He squeezed her hand and tried to fight the pain, but it was hardly a minute after Adam started before he screamed. He choked back his next cry and wished he would just pass out.  
  
Adam stopped his work, tempted to take Jesse back to Sanctuary where could use a local anesthetic. There was no way he could finish this with Jesse awake. "Shal, there should be a tranquilizer gun in the weapons locker. I need you to get the darts from it."  
  
"Adam, those darts only last ten minutes," she reminded him while doing as told.  
  
"I know," he said, returning his focus to Jesse. "Jesse, I'm putting you to sleep for a while. If you wake up before I'm done, I can tranq you again. But I'm going to give you another shot of morphine just in case that happens, okay? There shouldn't be any pain."  
  
Taking a dart from Shalimar, he studied it in his hand for a moment. He was extremely hesitant to sedate Jesse, but it needed to be done. Once the young man was asleep, he looked to Shalimar. "I need you to keep tabs on his pulse and breathing."  
  
He was nervous, so she was also. "What if there are complications?" she asked. With Jesse unconscious, he wouldn't be able to tell them if there was a problem.  
  
"That's why you're monitoring him. But nothing is going to happen. Removing the bullet should be simple." He gave her an encouraging smile. "It'll be a walk in the park."  
  
"That's what got him shot in the first place," she mumbled. "And if this is so simple, why are you scared?"  
  
He couldn't lie to her. "Because it's Jesse." Even a one in a thousand chance of something going wrong was more than Adam was willing to risk. Getting up, he moved to the computer console and pulled up the GPS. "I'm highlighting all hospitals and Sanctuary. If something does go wrong, head for whichever is closest."  
  
-----  
  
"Mr. Eckhart, Kilmartin has been 'rescued' and we're getting a strong signal from the tracking chip. It's been stationary for the past fifteen minutes."  
  
Eckhart's expression changed to what could almost be considered a grin. "Do we have the location of Adam's Sanctuary?"  
  
His subordinate shifted awkwardly. "Actually, sir, you might want to take a look at this."  
  
Walking over to the computer display, he saw the location of signal and his almost grin transformed into a very real scowl. Adam had caught on to the game. "Well played."  
  
According to the map, Sanctuary was located directly in the center of a very familiar river.  
  
-----  
  
Since he'd failed to get information he wanted from Kilmartin, Eckhart ordered DeLauro to be brought to him for interrogation. Her handler escorted her somewhat roughly into the room.  
  
At the sight of Eckhart, Emma rolled her eyes. "Oh good grief."  
  
"How are you feeling?" he asked with mocked sympathy. "I've been informed you're coming down with the flu."  
  
Emma decided she might as well trust Mehler and play along on the rare chance he actually did want to help Brennan. She was feeling a bit under the weather, so faking flu symptoms would be easy enough. She sniffled. "Come a little closer and I'll breathe on you."  
  
He'd almost forgotten about that charming whit of hers. "You don't seem pleased to see me."  
  
With a groan, she replied, "Can't we jump ahead here? Let's pretend you've already been menacing, I've invited you to go to hell, we've both agreed to continue despising each other, and now that that's over, I'll be going back to my room where a healthy Brennan will be waiting for me."  
  
Eckhart was far from amused. "Sit down, Miss DeLauro."  
  
Her handler shoved her into the chair and fastened the restraints. When he was done, Eckhart indicated that he could leave. Like a good little GS agent, he promptly left.  
  
"Here is the way this conversation is going to go," Eckhart informed Emma after they were alone. "I will do whatever I wish. If you speak without being asked a direct question, I will set off your sub-dermal governor, causing you excruciating pain. After those formalities are behind us, I'll ask you the location of Sanctuary and what protocols are needed for me to gain entrance. You will supply this information willingly or I will have Mulwray killed. Do we understand each other?"  
  
She glared daggers at the man. "You've killed him already. He'll wake up afterward."  
  
"And when he does, you will have a front row seat for when I kill him again, as slowly and with as much pain as I see fit." He leaned over her. "If I am displeased with the quality of the information you provide, we'll repeat the process as many times as is required."  
  
Emma stared hard at him, trying to keep her bottom lip from quivering. "Bastard."  
  
He set off her governor and she cried out in pain. After almost a full minute, he stopped. "Now, Miss DeLauro, the location of Sanctuary if you don't mind?"  
  
"Go to hell," she shot back viscously. "Go some place worse than that. Go see Barney and Friends on Ice."  
  
At that, he activated her governor once more, longer this time. "Sarcasm is not appreciated."  
  
"I won't tell you anything," Emma stated firmly.  
  
"Very well. Perhaps you'd prefer we talk again after I've killed your friend several more times." He opened the door and called for her handler. As he released her from the chair, Eckhart added, "I'll give you a while to think over my proposal. A short while."  
  
Eckhart then exited and Emma closed her eyes tightly. She wasn't going to cry. Eckhart wouldn't do it. Nobody was that heartless. He was bluffing, and she wouldn't cry.  
  
Because, if he carried out his threat, she'd tell him everything.  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
I'm back in school now, and I'm starting a new job, so parts might be scarce for a while. However, I'll try to follow my system for knowing when I need to update. It goes like this:  
  
1 - 2 death threats: the readers can dangle off the cliff a bit longer  
  
3 - 5 death threats: time to post a new chapter  
  
5 - 10 death threats: the next part should have been posted yesterday  
  
10 and over: write faster out of fear for life  
  
LOL! Seriously though, you guys are great. I especially enjoy the feedback that reassures me I'm still evil. 


	25. Risks

Sorry about the delay. Been busy with school, work, and life in general.  
  
----- -----  
  
Jordan decided to pay an unscheduled visit to Eckhart, and he found the man headed for his office. "Sir, a word?"  
  
Motioning for him to follow, Eckhart entered the office. "What can I do for you, Mr. Mehler?"  
  
"It's regarding Mulwray." Jordan took a seat across from the man as Eckhart moved into the chair behind his desk. "I think it would be prudent to schedule a psych evaluation. The experiment is already showing signs of having serious long-term effects."  
  
Folding his hands, Eckhart rested them on his desk. "I'm not overly concerned with his emotional wellbeing."  
  
"Sir?" Jordan furrowed his brow in confusion.  
  
"Need I remind you that Mulwray is still a criminal?" Eckhart asked. "His record goes way back. He made a career of being a thief before being hired by Adam and the rest of his outlaw gang, possibly as an assassin. He's responsible for the deaths of several GS agents."  
  
Jordan nodded. "I am aware of that." He paused. "After the experiment is concluded, you won't exactly be able to sentence him to life in prison, so might I inquire as to what your plan is for him?"  
  
"Since rehabilitation is impossible," Eckhart said, standing to signal an end to their conversation, "he'll be executed."  
  
-----  
  
A slight stirring alerted Adam, and he moved to Jesse's bedside. The young man was awake. "You're in Sanctuary," Adam informed him before he could ask. "Everything went smoothly, so you'll be good as new in a few days. How are you feeling?"  
  
"Not sure yet," Jesse replied groggily. "How long was I asleep?"  
  
"Not long. Maybe two hours," answered Adam. He was relieved that Jesse was going to be fine, but he still felt the need to lecture him. "If Shalimar and I hadn't found you when we did, the situation could have been far worse."  
  
"I know, Adam," Jesse answered apologetically.  
  
"I don't think you do," Adam responded almost hastily, upset with the situation they'd nearly been placed in. "Your actions earlier bordered on stupidity. I expect a certain amount of impulsive behavior, but I would have thought you knew better. You could have single-handedly destroyed Mutant X. Do you even realize what you did?"  
  
"Yeah, Adam, I get it, okay!" Jesse shot back, defensive from the mounting harshness of Adam's tone. "I screwed up. I'm sorry... But it was my decision to make. You treat me like a child."  
  
"You are a child! If you want me to treat you differently, start acting like an adult." He regretted the words as soon as they'd left his mouth, but he felt he had a right to be angry. His team was all that mattered to him, and the thought of losing Jesse was unbearable. "Your actions affect more than just you."  
  
"I wasn't going to sit on my ass while you did nothing," he spat back in frustration, shoving himself into an upright position and then wincing at the sharp pain in his back. "There's a difference between loyalty and blind obedience. From now on, you only have the first. Although I don't know why. You don't even see me."  
  
Adam frowned but dropped the subject since Jesse's back was clearly hurting him. "I'll get you something more for the pain," he said stiffly.  
  
Jesse eased himself back down and then let Adam administer the drugs. "Thanks," he mumbled.  
  
"I'll let you speak with Shalimar for five minutes since she's worried about you, but then you should try to get some rest." Adam turned to leave in order to fetch her. He knew she'd be waiting right outside.  
  
"I am sorry, Adam," Jesse said softly. He wasn't completely sorry for his actions, but he truly did regret their outcome. Something had needed to be done, and he hadn't seen any other options, yet he'd unknowingly risked everything.  
  
"I know. We'll discuss this more later," Adam replied, giving himself a chance to calm down.  
  
-----  
  
After lying in the lab for what seemed like several hours, Brennan decided it had been quiet long enough and everybody was finally gone. He partially opened his eyes and glanced around. Time to make his move. He only needed to get one hand free.  
  
The restraints weren't overly tight, but he couldn't quite pull himself free. He carefully adjusted the position of his hand, then he gritted his teeth and braced himself. He gave himself a small count, and then jerked his hand hard, dislocating his thumb.  
  
He hissed slightly at the pain, but he knew it would heal. Next, he aimed his now free hand at the camera and sent an electrical charge at it. They wouldn't take long to figure that stunt out, so Brennan needed to act quickly.  
  
After releasing his other binds, he hopped down from the table, keeping the sheet wrapped around him until he could locate his clothes. He almost fell due to his leg still feeling numb, but he forced himself to walk. Upon discovering his clothing, he yanked his pants back on, ignoring the stab of pain in his hip. Then he needed to sit down and catch his breath.  
  
It wasn't good that he was this tired. He could not stay here another minute. Shoving himself back into action, he began tossing open all the cabinets and drawers. He was in a medical lab, so there had to be something he'd recognize as a stimulant, or steroids, or a painkiller, or... anything to give himself a temporary boost.  
  
He stopped when he found several adrenaline shots. He grabbed one before hesitating. Was he honestly considering this? He'd seen it on TV once. Of course that had been a doctor trying way too dramatically to revive a patient who'd just crashed, but what the hell. All he needed to do was stab himself in the chest with it and aim for his heart. Easy.  
  
Yeah right. He took several deep breaths and tried to steady himself. He'd just take an educated guess at exactly where he'd need to stick the huge needle into his chest. What was the worst that could happen? He'd kill himself?  
  
Brennan actually laughed at that thought before realizing it shouldn't have been funny. He suddenly felt an overwhelming need to get out of this place now before it was too late for him. All the experiments were altering his mind and he couldn't even think straight. He didn't want Eckhart to change him... To turn him into someone he wasn't supposed to be.  
  
And then there was Emma.  
  
"One, two, three..." he whispered quietly before plunging the needle swiftly into his chest. He gasped sharply as he let himself collapse to the floor. He stared at the ceiling for a moment before yanking the needle out with a shaking hand.  
  
Oh god, what a rush. "Now get up," he ordered himself. He shoved himself off the floor, took a second assure himself that he hadn't accidentally killed himself, then grabbed his shirt and pulled it over his head as he rushed out the lab door.  
  
-----  
  
A few minutes after Adam exited, Shalimar entered. Jesse gave her a small smile. "Are you mad at me too?" he asked.  
  
"Only a little bit," she half-teased, moving to stand near him. "You okay?"  
  
"I guess," he replied. "Kinda expected to be sleeping on my stomach for a while, though." Instead, he was propped on his side with pillows.  
  
Shalimar grinned. "You get all fussy when you have to lie on your stomach." She tousled his hair.  
  
"Cut it out," he complained, batting her hand away.  
  
"You're not okay, are you?" she asked with concern. Adam had seemed somewhat upset when he'd left, and she wondered what they'd talked about.  
  
He shook his head. "I'm fine. I just want to know how much I'll need to apologize for almost allowing Eckhart to find Sanctuary."  
  
"That's what you think the problem is?" She was a bit surprised.  
  
"Yeah, what else would it be?" He stared at her.  
  
She gently took his hand. "Jess... Adam's only angry because you could have been killed. You really frazzled him."  
  
Leaning his head back, Jesse closed his eyes. "Sometimes I don't think he cares what I do. I'm just always around. In his eyes, I know I'm still the same kid he took pity on when he first brought me here. Now... I dunno. I feel like I should be paying rent or something."  
  
She was tempted to hug him but didn't want to hurt his back. "You know that's not true. We all need you, Jess. And Adam loves you." She gave him a quirky grin. "He just loves me more."  
  
That actually got Jesse to smile. "Does not," he replied with a small laugh.  
  
After tucking his blanket around him, she brushed the hair back from his forehead. "Get some sleep. I'll curl up in a chair or something and stay nearby."  
  
"Yes, mother," Jesse replied.  
  
She glanced back over at him. "You are okay now, right?"  
  
"Yeah," he answered. "I will be."  
  
-----  
  
After quickly forming a burst of power between his hands, Brennan blew out yet another camera. He was leaving an obvious trail. They could follow his position by merely noting locations of the blacked out systems. He needed to find a better way of moving through the complex.  
  
He heard footfalls around the corner, coming in his direction. It sounded like a single person. He pressed himself against the wall and held perfectly still, a small spark of electricity in his hand.  
  
As soon as the man turned into the hall, Brennan had him unconscious on the floor. It was the older doctor from earlier, probably headed back to the lab for him. Brennan looked around the corner, but his fast check showed no signs of Jordan.  
  
He dragged the lone man to the side of the hall, then stripped him of his lab coat. As Brennan slipped it on, he noticed the small stain of blood at his hip. He ignored it and resumed walking. He forced his stride to stay even. If he walked with his face tilted down, the angle of the cameras would make it impossible to distinguish him from one of the doctors.  
  
Yet as soon as the pieces fell into place, every guard in the entire building would know he was headed for Emma.  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
To everybody who left the lovely death threats for the last chapter, thank you, it's nice to know so many of you still care enough to want to kill me. *grin*  
  
If you're comment was only a "write more," while I do appreciate those, you'll have better success if you leave a constructive review. Say something that gets me thinking, and next thing you know, you've gotten me writing. 


	26. Differences

-----  
  
Eckhart stared at his computer screen, reading over the forwarded e-mail that had been sent to his Genomex account. He didn't recognize the IP address of the sender, but it was signed as being from "an old friend," obviously Adam.  
  
He knew the man would never agree to his terms, but he typed his reply. He'd accept nothing less. And if Adam did refuse as he predicted, he'd end up making his past friend pay far more.  
  
The stakes in their little cat and mouse game had finally reached all or nothing.  
  
-----  
  
To Brennan's amazement, he made it almost all the way to his destination without a problem. No alarms had gone off, a sign of Eckhart's overconfidence in Brennan's inability to escape. His first true obstacle came at the sight of Emma's handler sealing the door to her room.  
  
Rage flared inside Brennan. The man had obviously just returned Emma, meaning he'd taken her somewhere. "What did you do with her?" Brennan asked, his tone ice cold.  
  
The man jerked his head around, spotting Brennan. He instantly drew his knife, taking up a fighting stance. "Looks like the puppy managed to get off his leash." He scowled at Brennan, ready to place him back in a cage where he belonged.  
  
Glaring, Brennan made sure to stay alert of any movement of the blade. Where knifes standard GSA issue now or something? "You know, guns work better." He moved his hands into position for channeling his power.  
  
Seeing the telltale sign of Brennan readying to throw an energy blast at him, Emma's handler didn't wait and lunged forward to strike before allowing the charge time to form.  
  
Needing to avoid the attack, Brennan was forced to drop the current. The distance between them would be closed before he'd be able to take his shot. Instead, he prepared to dodge. He'd block the knife and use the man's own momentum to propel him into the wall.  
  
Either Brennan's timing was off, or the man anticipated the move, because as Brennan attempted the sidestep, Emma's handler moved with him. His left hand was easily blocked as the two made contact, but Brennan knew he was leaving his entire upper body open to the man's right and the blade of the knife.  
  
Making an instant decision, Brennan brought up his other arm and shielded himself. He cried out as the knife sliced the back of his arm, cutting deep enough to graze the bone. However, that action had been a better option than allowing a stab which could have easily proved fatal.  
  
Wasting no time in dealing with the pain, Brennan grabbed the man's arm and fought for the knife. As they were locked together in the struggle, Brennan seized the opportunity to kick the other man's legs out from under him. They both went down and resumed the battle for control.  
  
Eventually, Brennan found himself pinned, using all his strength to attempt shoving the knife away from his throat. But his efforts were failing, and he felt the cool metal of the blade touch his skin.  
  
"Mr. Eckhart normally doesn't approve of using lethal force," Emma's handler spat through gritted teeth, "but I don't think he'd care if I slit your throat. You're beyond being a freak."  
  
It really didn't matter if he died, Brennan realized. His death would only make a difference to Emma. He'd wake up healed, but he'd lose his chance of getting her out. That was reason enough to fight. He suddenly angled his legs to push the man off him while rolling to other side. The knife cut the side of his neck, but not deeply.  
  
Another dodge, then another punch, a blur of actions, and somehow the knife slipped free and hit the floor. Brennan was fighting using solely instinct now. The stakes were too high for him to lose.  
  
Both men were now standing, neither going for the knife. That action would leave their backs open to attack. They both knew to never look away during conflict. This wasn't some movie where everyone dove for a fallen weapon. In this situation, even if you got to the knife first, the other would never grant you the chance to get up, turn around, and then finally attempt a thrust. No matter how swift the action, whoever went for the blade would lose.  
  
Each took up the defensive, hoping the other would act first. And Brennan couldn't afford to wait long. He'd gotten lucky so far, but soon this fight would no longer be one on one. He had to end it before being faced with an entire security team.  
  
"You need my handprint to open the door," Emma's handler sneered at him.  
  
Raising his own hand, Brennan formed a spark. "I think mine will work fine."  
  
The other man laughed, dark and forced. "Try it. The doors default to lock, not open. You'll entomb your girl inside that room."  
  
Knowing he couldn't simply ask the man to open the door for him, Brennan decided further talk was pointless. He ran the couple steps forward and slapped his palm against the man's chest, delivering an unregulated surge of power while using his free hand to stop the attempted block. The man fell back and Brennan held him to wall beside the door, never letting up and continuing to force the electrical current into his body.  
  
When he became limp, Brennan grabbed him, holding him up just long enough to press his hand to the panel. Then he let him drop as the door slid open. The man hit the floor hard and didn't move.  
  
"Emma!" Brennan called out, rushing into the room but making sure the door wouldn't close behind him. Relief washed over him as he saw her, and he practically sprinted over to her. He gently caressed her cheek and then tilted her chin up toward him so he could look into her sad eyes. He'd been so afraid Eckhart would have managed to move her before he got to her, or that she'd be hurt, or about a million other terrible things.  
  
"Bren..." She looked back at him before moving into his arms. She held onto him, praying that he hadn't been tortured as badly this time. After Eckhart's threat, she doubted it.  
  
He pulled her closer and placed a soft kiss against her hair. "We have to go." Touching the small of her back, he traced his fingers up her spine until her reached her neck, then he zapped her governor, but his hand remained resting on her skin. He wanted to touch her, draw her even tighter to him, be reassured that she was real and alive... and have her confirm that he was.  
  
As her gift returned, Emma suddenly knew something was wrong. She tensed in his arms. His emotions were practically drowning her. She took a step back, also feeling his physical pain. "Brennan, your arm is bleeding."  
  
He glanced at the wound but shook his head. "Doesn't matter."  
  
Emma made herself look beyond him, using her eyes, not her psionic abilities. Brennan was wearing a lab coat, and their door was still standing open. It dawned on her that they were going to run. Yet she could feel Brennan's strength draining from him.  
  
"Give me your arm." He obeyed, and she hurriedly ripped the already torn sleeve. She used it to tie off his wound, although she sensed that was the least of his problems. However, she'd need to wait and wade through his overwhelming emotions later.  
  
An alarm abruptly began to blare. Right now, they needed to move. Brennan clutched her hand. "Come on." He pulled her through the doorway and into the hall.  
  
At the sight of her handler lying on the floor, Emma let her fingers slip from his. She couldn't tear her gaze away from the body at her feet. She could sense nothing from the man. He felt hollow. Yet Brennan was emitting in waves. There was blackness inside him now. Hatred, anger... remorse. Whatever had happened here, he was completely stained by it.  
  
She took her eyes from the body and stared at Brennan, not wanting to believe what he'd done. "He's dead," she said quietly.  
  
"Leave him," Brennan replied, turning to continue down the hall. He could feel Emma's eyes drilling into his back. He'd used his abilities to kill, and he didn't care.  
  
He really had lost his soul.  
  
Suddenly frozen, Brennan could no longer move, no longer breathe. He'd actually killed somebody. Deliberately. That man was GSA, evil, he deserved to die. Brennan truly wanted him dead.  
  
Maybe he was just becoming his true self. His stint with Mutant X was only a joke. How easily he'd been able to swear off his loyalty to Adam when Jordan seemed a better option. And only moments ago he'd purposefully not regulated his power, ignoring the voltage, wanting it to cause more damage than unconsciousness. He was capable of turning his back on everything. He'd been on the other side all his life. Outlaw. Thief. Criminal. And now murderer.  
  
It wasn't an accident. Neither was it self-defense. The situation could have been handled without lethal force.  
  
Walk forward or go back? That single choice would either damn or redeem him. Who he was hung in the balance.  
  
But he already knew who he was. He was Brennan Mulwray, the bad apple that nobody wanted. He was trouble, just like his stepfather had always said he would grow up to be. Everyone had been right about him never amounting to anything. The people he considered friends weren't exactly respectable, and they hadn't even really noticed when he'd moved and joined Mutant X. Everybody else in his life had only cared enough to try to take advantage of him and then leave.  
  
On the other hand, there was still the other him, the Brennan Mulwray nobody knew all that well, the person he desperately wanted to be. Somebody who mattered and made a difference. Somebody with true friends, maybe even a family. The Brennan Mulwray he wished he could become had earned the trust of Jesse and Shalimar, and the respect of Adam who'd lately been his role model. He was one of the good guys - honest, decent - and no one felt the need to watch their wallets around him. That was the person Emma saw when she looked at him. She made him want that life, and made him believe it wasn't merely a fantasy.  
  
Making his decision, Brennan turned back. He hurriedly knelt beside the fallen man and placed his hands over his chest. Carefully, he channeled his power before using it to jump-start the GS agent's heart. He found a pulse after his second try.  
  
Then he closed his eyes and shook with the sobs that threatened to break free. He had done the right thing, so was there still hope for him after all? He didn't want to hear the alarm, didn't want to get up. He wanted to cry because he was so lost that he'd very nearly taken a life. He'd thought it mattered who it was, as if killing a GS agent was a forgivable sin. He had chosen who deserved to die. That act made him no better than the man on the floor before him.  
  
Emma rested her hand on his shoulder as precious seconds slipped by. He would need to face these thoughts some other time. All that was important now was that he'd wanted to take his action back. That was what made him different. "It's okay," she whispered comfortingly. "Brennan, it's okay."  
  
She'd felt the turmoil of his mind and hadn't interfered. Above all else, she still had faith in him. Realizing this, he shakily stood and took her hand, his lifeline. For today, he could still pretend the slate was wiped clean, and just maybe there was a chance it could stay that way for the rest of his life. He looked at Emma for a moment before speaking. He couldn't allow her to wait with him while he dealt with the mass of things he was feeling. He had to able to continue, to flee. "We need to run."  
  
-----  
  
"Post guards at all the exits," Eckhart ordered the man in charge of security whose name he'd never bothered to learn. That didn't matter now, though - he'd already decided to have him fired tomorrow for letting Mulwray and DeLauro both get lose. If they actually managed to escape, he might need to cheer himself up by firing at the incompetent man with a literal gun, and he would have no qualms with doing the job personally. "Lock the parking garage doors and double security for that entire section."  
  
As the man shouted instructions into his walkie-talkie, another security agent addressed Eckhart. "Sir, we just lost cameras H-23 through 26. He's moving away from the garages."  
  
"Are they both together?" Eckhart demanded.  
  
"Unknown," was the instant reply. "We're losing systems before getting visuals."  
  
Eckhart stared over his shoulder at the monitors right as another one blinked out and changed to static. "Seal off all the elevators, I want access to the main level blocked, and make sure electrical overrides won't open those doors."  
  
"We'll have to manually lock each door," somebody told him.  
  
"Do it," he snapped back, growing frustrated. "While your crew is doing that, I need you to pull up the emergency procedures for the complex and trip the fire alarms for the whole floor. If he keeps shorting out cameras, I want to be able to flood all of SL-1. And make certain the men at the exits are fully armed. If anyone tries to leave this building, they have my authorization to shoot to kill."  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
For those who asked:  
  
No, Emma does not have the ability to heal. Yes, Brennan can still be permanently killed. No, Eckhart wasn't lying.  
  
If anybody wants further explanation, let me know. Also, if you want me to respond to your feedback, e-mail me (aliasjanedoe@hotmail.com). I'd love to chat with you, but I feel weird replying to comments left on ff.net seeing as it isn't meant to be a bulletin board.  
  
Oh, and does this story have too much Brennan/Emma ship, or not enough? You guys are confusing me. I thought you all wanted more, but now I've got at least a couple people who want less. And there are the few who want me to pair up Brennan and Jordan! For crying out loud you guys, I can't please all of you! But I've gotta say the slashers send the most amusing feedback. You people are so sick and twisted, it's great. I'm probably never going to write slash, because ick, but please don't stop trying to convert me. Your messages are currently the highlights of my day. 


	27. Connections

This part is for those who complained about my last few being too short (despite them being average length). I normally shoot for about 1,500 words. This chapter is over 5,000. If you appreciate having a part that's several times longer, please try to find several things to comment about. Constructive criticism makes me happy.  
  
-----  
  
Emma gasped as a spray of cold water hit her. She stared up at the sprinkler system as Brennan pulled the lab coat up and held it over his head to shield himself.  
  
He stared at Emma. "I can't zap many more cameras before I'm drenched," he told her. "Can you hide us?"  
  
"I can't use my powers against video tape, Bren," she replied nervously.  
  
"It doesn't matter if we're on the tape. Just tap into the minds of the people watching the feeds. We only need a couple seconds to get past each camera," he explained hopefully, praying she was up for the challenge.  
  
She nodded briskly. "I can try."  
  
"Good, then let's go." He started to sprint once more, his stride now showing a hint of a limp. They turned a corner and he immediately threw a shock at the camera. Then he ran down the hall and took out several others before returning to Emma and dragging her in the opposite direction. He wanted to cause confusion.  
  
"Where exactly are we going?" she asked while rushing to keep up.  
  
Passing another wall map, mostly marked with letter/number codes and few actual words, Brennan pointed at what looked like a small square room. Emma clearly didn't understand, so he elaborated. "The parking garages are out - Eckhart will have planned for that. So you're going to do your thing and walk us straight through the front doors. However, there's no front door on this map. We also haven't seen any windows. So my guess is there's a sublevel to this building and we're in it. Therefore, all these oddly tiny rooms are elevators."  
  
"Makes sense," she agreed as they approached the next hall.  
  
"Either that or we're attempting to escape through a broom closet," he tried to joke, shoving all other thoughts aside. "There's going to be another camera. Can you get us by it?"  
  
Focusing intently, she forced herself to sense beyond Brennan who was still sending waves of disturbing feelings crashing over her. She so badly wanted to delve into his mind and try to help him. With great effort, she moved further out and scanned the building. Finally, she was certain she'd located the men watching the camera feeds. "Alright, everyone should be seeing looped footage... NOW!"  
  
Brennan wrapped his arm around her and pulled her along with him, keeping her running while she struggled to hold the mental mirage. "Next camera," he called to her when they neared another one.  
  
"I've got it," she answered, closing her eyes and concentrating, letting him guide her.  
  
"Around the next corner should be the elevators," he relayed. Yet as soon as they turned, he shoved her back. "Guards."  
  
Lowering her voice to a barely audible volume, she whispered, "How many?"  
  
"Only two. I can take them. You stay here." Shrugging off the lab coat, he tried to shake away enough water in order for him to be dry enough to use his powers. He wound up a charge between his hands, luckily not electrocuting himself in the process.  
  
Darting around the corner, he tossed the current, missing his target by a good two feet. Fortunately, he moved back fast enough for the guard to miss him as well as he opened fire. Several bullets impacted the edge of the wall.  
  
Acting quickly, Emma pressed them both flat to the side of the hall, trying to keep out from under the sprinklers while doing so. "We're the wall," she whispered into his ear before covering his mouth with her palm to hush him.  
  
To Brennan's surprise, when the guards rounded into the hall, they went right past him and Emma. As soon as they were far enough away, the two resumed their path to the elevator. It wouldn't respond when he pushed the button, so Brennan sparked the door control then slid it open.  
  
He turned to Emma. "You got the camera?"  
  
"I don't know," she replied nervously, already feeling like her abilities were maxed out.  
  
He dropped a gentle kiss against her forehead. "You can hold it." They entered and he shoved the door back into place.  
  
Emma stared at the blinking red light of the camera in the corner and furrowed her brow. She had to hang on awhile longer.  
  
Using his height to his advantage, Brennan opened the ceiling panel, then pulled himself through. He tried to open the doors for the next floor and failed. "They've locked the next level," he called down to Emma. "We could climb the cables and try the floors above. The shaft goes up several stories."  
  
She shook her head, shifting her view from the camera in order to see what was going on above her. "I can't climb that. And Eckhart knows we need to go up. What if the other floors are locked as well?"  
  
Brennan swung back down and dropped to stand beside her. "Can you tell if the guards are back outside?"  
  
"I'm not sure. I think so." She waited to hear his plan.  
  
He studied the door, wondering exactly where on the other side the men would be standing. "When I open the door, you take left, I'll take right."  
  
She nodded and readied herself as he opened the door. Moving quickly, they both had clear shots at their appointed targets from behind. Emma touched the head of hers. "Sleep," she instructed, using her psionic abilities to drop him.  
  
Not using his power, Brennan opted for going for the other man's gun and then pistol whipping him with it. The move was executed smoothly, but it troubled Emma that Brennan seemed subconsciously afraid to use his power against another person. There would be serious issues to work through once they got home.  
  
With both the men down, Emma looked to Brennan once more. "What now?"  
  
"If we can't get off this level by going up, we'll go down." He glanced at the unconscious guards. "Drag those guys somewhere out of sight of big brother."  
  
She did as told while Brennan set about forcing open all the other elevator doors. He could still override the ones on this floor, so hopefully the lockdown had started high and not reached the other sublevel yet. And he knew there was another floor below because there'd been an elevator button for SL-2. Unless they were already on SL-2, not SL-1 as he'd originally thought. He decided to count the floors next time he looked up one of the shafts.  
  
Almost ready to give up, Brennan tried the last elevator and was pleased to see that it had been stopped a few floors up. He wasn't thrilled, however, when he looked down.  
  
As Emma returned to him, she noticed that she was now walking in a layer of water that completely coated the floor. Brennan had suddenly become scared and it took all her strength to keep from reading him and hold her attention strongly on the task of creating the illusions that were keeping them off the GSA's radar.  
  
Brennan glanced over at her, his expression worried yet determined. "You still remember CPR, right?"  
  
Concern filled her at his words, and she stared down the elevator shaft where he was now looking. The floor below was at least a foot deep in water, and Brennan couldn't open the door without using his power. "You can't be serious?"  
  
He yanked his shirt over his head and wiped off his arms, then used the material to mop the floor, soaking up as much water as was possible. Getting down on his stomach, he leaned over the ledge. "I just want you to be prepared. This might get tricky."  
  
He stretched his arm down, aiming to use his power without dropping to the level below. Emma instantly had her shirt off as well and started drying the area around his legs. She stripped her pants off next, wishing she had a towel.  
  
"Cross your fingers," Brennan commented before forming a spark in his hand. He succeeded in getting off his charge without shocking himself, and he grinned over his shoulder at Emma.  
  
Relaxing slightly, she returned her thoughts to those of the security agents, hoping she hadn't dropped her control over them due to her fear for Brennan's safety.  
  
Drawing back from the edge, he hastily fetched his shirt and pulled it back over his head. If Emma had seen the mark on his chest, she didn't comment. They were descending to the floor below, so there was really no point in continuing the struggle to remain dry. Emma was a bit slower with her own clothes, and he tried not to stare as she slipped the wet material back on.  
  
"There's no way in hell you're going to convince me not to share this little incident with Jesse," he teased, needing to say something, hoping Emma could still joke with him if he pretended to find amusement in the situation. Anything was better than having her look at him with such concern. She had seen his chest, he could sense it. Inside his head, he could feel her faint presence. He was letting her see way too much.  
  
"Grow up," she replied, trying to lighten the mood and wanting to scowl at him but smiling instead. It would actually be funny to see Jesse's reaction to Brennan's most likely embellished telling of the tale. Her all wet and in clingy, soggy, white clothes... staring into his eyes.  
  
Whoa... she really was staring into his eyes. She quickly glanced away.  
  
He reached over and snapped her bra strap before she was able to get her top back on, the action playful but surprisingly gentle as his fingers grazed her shoulder. Once she was clothed again, he allowed himself to seriously look at her. "You really are beautiful, you know."  
  
His comment stunned Emma. She could feel his thoughts, and the amazing thing was he wasn't just looking at her body. He was looking at her. She'd grown accustomed to fielding lustful thoughts from men regarding her physical appearance, but she'd never felt anything quite like what she was picking up from Brennan now. It seemed like she could be the ugliest person alive and he would still have said it. The thought was completely pure.  
  
She found herself speechless as he helped her climb down into the empty elevator shaft. Out of sight of the cameras for the moment, she allowed herself to breathe. She wrapped herself inside the comforting warmth of Brennan's mind, realizing that she truly did love him. Yet she couldn't pretend that she didn't also feel the conflict in him. There were warring emotions, memories of torture and of dying, and traces of a madness that threatened to take hold.  
  
She fought against the negative portions of his mind, using her gift to reinforce his mental barriers. She tried to give him strength, assure them both that his sanity was still intact. Working diligently, she began sorting his thoughts and trying to further help him.  
  
"We can't do this here," he said uncertainly, attempting to find his voice. He could feel Emma's actions - felt suddenly more stable - yet he was also terrified of being so open to her. There were things trapped in his mind that he couldn't face now, maybe not ever. "We need to keep moving."  
  
"I'll be there when you decide it's time," she replied softly. He knew he would need her if he ever chose to deal with the part of his mind that was in chaos. He couldn't hope to block it off forever. She made sure he also knew she would never turn away from him.  
  
Staying close together, they moved through the deepening water, heading for the corner of the building. Emma didn't need to ask to know why. Brennan wasn't pushing her out, instead leaving her access to his thoughts and trusting her not to look in areas she knew he would forbid. This meant she could easily read everything on the surface. They were doing what they'd do if there actually was a fire: make their way to the stairs. They didn't know where to look, but if the place was built according to code, it would be required to have a staircase somewhere.  
  
-----  
  
Adam paced his room for a moment, pondering over the long talk he desperately needed to have with Jesse. It had been far overdue well before today.  
  
In all honesty, he knew that he did still treat Jesse like a child despite him proving himself a thousand times over. He was perfectly capable of living his life without Adam's supervision. He no longer needed constant help and training with his abilities, he could handle himself in a fight, he knew his way around the computers better than anybody, and his judgement was usually rather good.  
  
He didn't need Adam pretending to be his father. He should have known he'd need to face their relationship changing. If Jesse sought his respect, he'd earned it years ago, and Adam needed to tell him. However, if he was seeking independence... well, Adam wasn't ready for that.  
  
Jesse deserved to choose the kind of life he wanted. He would always be loyal to Mutant X, of that there was no doubt, but what right did Adam have to ask him to stay on the team forever?  
  
The truth of the matter was, Jesse didn't need Adam anymore. But Adam had grown to rely on him.  
  
Ordering himself not to pace, Adam sat down. The e-mail icon on his computer screen was flashing. He took a deep breath before opening the message. Mason was the only person who'd be sending to his private address.  
  
Reading over the text, he frowned deeply. This wasn't what he'd been expecting. He was willing to return Emma, but what he was asking in exchange was troubling.  
  
Adam stood, deciding he needed a drink. What Mason wanted should have been a simple request, not demanded as the price for getting a member of his team back. How had their friendship turned into this? Adam sighed. Jesse might just get his independence after all.  
  
-----  
  
"If Eckhart still thinks we're up a floor, why is there so much water down here?" Emma asked as she and Brennan waded through the halls.  
  
He kept moving, ignoring the pain in his arm and hip. "He's boxing us in. We can't go up with the elevator doors locked, and since he's wetting down SL-1, it's only natural that there'll be water on the floor below. Plus, he probably wants it that way. I can't use my power... and he knows I'm afraid."  
  
She hadn't noticed it earlier due to the feeling being lost amongst his fears of them being captured, but now she saw his torment at being down here. He was scared of the water. He was just combating the fear in order to focus on the mission at hand.  
  
"What I'm worried about is the lack of agents down here looking for us." Despite Emma being able to conceal their location, this still didn't seem right to him. If the sublevels had been cleared, it was very likely Eckhart was planning to submerge the lower floors.  
  
"We're not going to drown, Brennan," she assured him, feeling his terror at the thought of being trapped if the building was flooded. It seemed irrational to believe Eckhart would actually fill so much of the massive complex with water, the task being nearly impossible. He only wanted them thoroughly wet. It would take hours before the water would rise enough to be a real threat. But Brennan's thoughts weren't exactly rational. He'd lived this already. He'd been tied down and the water had covered him.  
  
He'd died.  
  
His breathing and heartbeat quickened, and Emma sent him calming emotions and thoughts of safety. He still increased his pace. "I think you're reading me enough to know that there were no stairways on the map. We're heading for an empty space and are gambling as to what it actually is."  
  
She did know. He was doubting his ability to get them outside and away from all the white walls. He was also afraid of panicking. But she trusted him - there would be stairs, he wouldn't have a mental breakdown, and they would escape. They would get out of here, together.  
  
"I'm glad you're so confident," he commented.  
  
She gaped at him. Was he reading her?  
  
"I've been able to know your feelings since the first time you touched me," he told her as explanation. "More than is natural. I know that now. Whatever this thing is between us, I think you've been allowing it to go both ways."  
  
She'd felt the connection to him from the second she'd seen him and sought his help, but she'd never realized she'd created such a strong bond between them. The first conversation they had came rushing back to her. He'd said that he'd seen into her. She'd let down her defenses where he was concerned, and she had never fully put them back up. Time had allowed the link to strengthen without her being aware of it. Brennan hadn't realized it before today either.  
  
He stopped moving and turned to face her. "Are you alright?" She stared at him as if expecting him to know the answer. "I'm not a mind-reader, Em. I don't have ESP. I only pick up what you want me to."  
  
"Oh," she replied quietly before carefully taking his hand. "This might have been an accident, but I'm glad it happened. I don't want to always have walls up. I want the connection between us to stay. That is, if you're okay with it?"  
  
"Yeah." He swallowed, his throat feeling a bit dry. Accepting the link with full knowledge of what that meant was a huge decision. It meant he was finally letting himself completely trust somebody.  
  
Emma felt a flicker of thought cross his mind, contemplating kissing her. Yet he chose not to act on it. This was still too new, and under the current circumstances, he didn't think it wise to make their relationship about anything more than a deep friendship. At least... not yet.  
  
Emma was a bit disappointed as they resumed their trek. She wanted him to kiss her. There were still a thousand things that they needed time to figure out, but she was positive her feelings went further than friendship. However, after all Brennan had been put through recently, she decided it was best for her to settle for being the friend he needed right now.  
  
All those thoughts were put on hold as they reached the stairs. Brennan shoved the door that was preventing them access; it didn't budge. With the type of lock, not even an electric zap would do any good. But Brennan was drenched anyway, so that wasn't an option to begin with.  
  
"What kind of demented people lock the stairwell during a frelling fire drill?!" he said angrily but trying not to shout for fear of being heard. He pounded the door. "And remind me to say no the next time Shal suggests twelve straight hours of Farscape! We all know she never even liked that show until Crichton traded in his flight suit for those tight leather pants."  
  
Emma did have to credit the wardrobe people for their good taste. The logical side of her argued that the Peacekeepers would never wear that kind of clothing; however, she herself had been known to kick ass in inappropriate outfits on more than one occasion. It wasn't exactly practical, but it was fun to look hot while out fighting for truth, justice, and the American way. Okay, so maybe that was a bit too much like a comic book cover, but at least they didn't battle with the GSA while donning masks and capes.  
  
"Girls spend way too much time thinking about clothes," remarked Brennan, still contemplating how to break down the door.  
  
"I think we passed a fire extinguisher a little ways back," suggested Emma, running to fetch it. Upon finding it, she returned and handed it to Brennan who used it to freeze the lock. "And guys dwell on fashion issues as well. Like nobody noticed when you and Jesse went through your tank top phase because you were trying to pump your biceps and out flex each other."  
  
He did a mock flex before using the back of the extinguisher to smash the lock. "That was actually more about my earlier statement. Girls spend way too much time thinking about clothes." He grinned. "You noticed the tank tops, after all."  
  
"I've also noticed some really bad taste in hats," she commented as he managed to get the door to open and held it while she walked through. "And as long as we're critiquing what's in your closet..."  
  
"Adam kept getting us up at ungodly hours of the morning," he interrupted as they began climbing the two stories worth of steps. "Would you prefer I wander around with bed hair?"  
  
"I actually think it's cute when you look like something the cat dragged in," she admitted. "You look too perfect the rest of the time."  
  
"If you like how I look, why are you always picking on me about what I wear?" he asked, attempting to keep up the banter. It was preferable to discussing anything else. He started trailing his hand along the wall to steady himself. He left a smear of blood and dropped his arm back to his side. His wound was bleeding freely again.  
  
She gave him a slightly worried look. "It's just that once in a while trying some Ralph Lauren or Calvin Klein wouldn't be such a bad thing. Unless of course you enjoy looking like a Banana Republic meets thrift store poster boy. And let me fix your arm again."  
  
He rejected the offer and kept moving. "My arm is fine."  
  
"No, it's not." She adjusted her pace to match his. "You're fading fast here, Bren. It's obvious that you're hurt."  
  
He sighed, setting down the fire extinguisher and resting for a minute. "I did something stupid, but I'm just tired now. I'm fine. Can we keep going please and not talk about this?" His tone indicated that he never wanted to discuss it.  
  
Picking up the extinguisher, Emma resumed the fast-paced stair climb. If Brennan didn't want to talk, conversation could wait until they got home. Adam could fix him up, and then they'd go from there. They just needed to get to there first.  
  
When they reached the first floor landing, Emma mimicked Brennan's earlier move of freezing then bashing the lock. "I guess it's time to play GSA and stroll out of here," she commented nervously.  
  
Brennan placed his hand on her shoulder. "Can you do this?" he asked seriously.  
  
"Yeah, piece of cake, no problem." She straightened her shoulders and walked as if she owned the place. Nobody was going to give them a second look.  
  
As they approached the main entrance, Brennan was fast getting a bad feeling about this plan. It was happening much too easily.  
  
Emma suddenly held out her hand and motioned for him to stop. "You're right." She leaned back against the wall and took several deep breaths. "I can't do this."  
  
"Yes, you can," he assured her. "Now what's wrong?"  
  
She shook her head, her confidence shattered. "The reason we haven't run into any more guards is because they're all at the exits. We'll have to walk right through at least forty of them. I'm picking up hits all over the place, Bren. They're waiting for us, and they're all armed."  
  
"You've manipulated groups before," he reminded her encouragingly. "Tell me you can do this."  
  
"I can't," she blurted, feeling very frightened. "I can't deceive all of them. Not while keeping us off the cameras. There's too many."  
  
He stared into her eyes. "We're not giving up. Just get us as far as you can, then we'll fight. If they open fire, stay behind me."  
  
She sought out his hand and held tightly to it. "We won't make it."  
  
He ran his free hand tensely through his hair. "Okay... Let me think." He paced a few steps. "We're getting out of here if we have to jump out a window."  
  
Emma nodded, feeling the fear radiating off him in waves. He wouldn't allow himself to be taken prisoner again. He'd rather die.  
  
Being so overwhelmed by Brennan's strong surge of emotion, Emma almost didn't sense the approaching guard until he was practically on top of them. She tossed up an illusion right as he rounded the corner.  
  
Noticing that he was suddenly in GSA uniform, Brennan knew what she'd done. He nodded to the guard as he and Emma walked past him. The man curtly nodded back before his eyes locked on Brennan.  
  
A trail of blood had made its way down his arm, and a single drop rolled down his hand and dripped from his finger. The instant the drop hit the floor, the guard went for his weapon and Brennan shoved Emma down. A bullet impacted the wall, just barely missing them.  
  
Thinking fast, Brennan lunged before the man could get off another shot. Successfully tackling his target, Brennan slammed him back into the wall. He smacked his head, and Brennan punched him several times while he was disoriented. He followed that by smashing the guard's head against the wall yet again, knocking him out.  
  
When he collapsed, Brennan retrieved his gun and shot the man in the leg. Emma watched in shock as Brennan then shoved the gun in the waistband of his pants. "I couldn't risk him alerting anyone," Brennan stated coldly.  
  
Emma was speechless. Brennan knew exactly how to handle a gun.  
  
He glanced over at her, hating the look in her eyes that she was directing at him. "You know I was a career criminal, Em."  
  
She nodded silently. He knew how to efficiently use a gun and had near perfect aim, but he'd always hated the things. He never liked taking jobs that required the team to carry weapons. And she kept telling herself that he'd never wanted that life. It had chosen him.  
  
"Maybe you're right," he said quietly, handing the gun over to her. "Now come on, gunfire doesn't often go unnoticed."  
  
"I think they noticed more than that," she replied, suddenly remembering the security cameras. She'd let the deception slip.  
  
Brennan understood and began running. Emma ditched the gun before following. Keeping it would make her too uncomfortable.  
  
Locating the main computer room, Brennan skidded to a halt and decided to make his stand. "They can't have this much hardware without the equipment being seriously grounded. I'm going to take out the mainframe and then as many connected systems as I can."  
  
"There's a security team right behind us," she informed him. "What's my part of the plan?"  
  
He stared at her before looking to the other exit at the opposite end of the room. "You're gonna run and find another way out of the building. Nobody knows you can use your power. I'll cause one hell of a diversion for you."  
  
"I'm not leaving you," she argued firmly.  
  
"Get out and call for help," he pleaded desperately. "You can make it and I can't. You can at least hide. A psionic distress call is our only hope. Now go!"  
  
Knowing there was no other option, Emma forced herself to leave his side. He was willing to be captured again so that she could escape. She hated being the only one able to send a message to the outside. That was an enormous responsibility, but she only needed to be given the chance to make a link with one of the other members of Mutant X. She could call in the Calvary so long as she wasn't too nervous to focus.  
  
As she finally ran for the door, a team of agents blocked her path. They all drew their weapons.  
  
Touching the equipment he needed to ground himself, Brennan threw a charge in their direction and blew up several of the computers in front of them. Using his power hurt, but he was grounded enough not to seriously harm himself. He was slowly drying now that he was out of the sublevels and away from the sprinklers. This floor had the system in place also, but nobody had activated it.  
  
Emma spun and headed for the other door right as Eckhart and another full team entered. She cursed.  
  
"Em, get behind me!" Brennan yelled to her, forming another charge to hold the men at bay.  
  
She did as instructed, sensing that he wasn't going down without a fight. Eckhart's men slowly began to adjust positions in order to surround them.  
  
Trapped, Brennan placed one hand on the most important looking system he could find. "You know, Eckhart," he called out, "it's a serious design flaw to have all your critical systems linked together."  
  
With that, he poured as much current into the equipment as he was able. All the computers in the room began blowing up, then the lights flickered. Brennan redoubled his efforts, intent on causing as much damage as possible.  
  
"Take him out," Eckhart ordered his team.  
  
The first man to fire seemed hesitant, his bullet only grazing Brennan's arm. He clutched the flesh wound for a second before using the hand to send a bolt toward the ceiling above the man who'd fired the shot. About five of the agents fell back. The others all raised their weapons again.  
  
Brennan turned to Emma. "When the lights go out, I want you to disappear," he said only loud enough for her to hear.  
  
He left his other palm on the console, and resumed delivering the surge. The lights all dimmed, then Emma heard the next shot ring out. In that split second before the electrical glow stopped, she saw Brennan get hit, saw the splatter of red, and then heard the bullet impact the wall to the side of her after ripping through Brennan's body... And as the entire building plunged into darkness, she watched in terror as Brennan fell.  
  
The pitch black only lasted a moment before a backup generator kicked on and the room was lit with small emergency lights. Emma hadn't been able to move. She couldn't abandon Brennan. Her clothes were dotted with scarlet, and he lay on the floor in front of her with a hole in his chest where the bullet had torn all the way through his shoulder. All of Eckhart's men still had their guns drawn.  
  
Dropping to her knees, Emma bent over Brennan. His eyelids fluttered as he stared up at her. The bleeding wasn't very extensive. "Get up," she begged him, nervously touching his arm. The bullet seemed to have gone as cleanly as was possible through his shoulder. She told herself that he could still run.  
  
"I can't," Brennan said, trying to shove himself up but not capable of moving. Emma used her gift to make him think he hadn't been shot, but he was still too weak and she was lying to herself if she didn't believe that they'd already failed.  
  
Not ready to stop, Emma tried to pull him up. "Come on, Brennan... You have to get up!" she cried, her voice cracking. He couldn't stay in this place and stay sane. "We can still beat them."  
  
As she started to focus on something nasty to send to their captors' minds, Brennan grabbed her hand. "No," he choked out. "It's over. There'll be a better time."  
  
He sent a silent message to her, praying she could read it, telling her not to let them know her governor had been disabled. It was hopeless now. They had no choice but to let themselves be taken once again. He couldn't even stand, much less run. All that mattered was that her governor stay deactivated.  
  
Tears streaked her cheeks, but she nodded. "Okay," she agreed softly, caressing his face. She knew he'd been hurt badly. And if they got up, Brennan would just be shot down again. They might even shoot her, and she wouldn't heal. It was best to just stay down. She slowly raised her hands up over her head. There was no other choice than surrender.  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
Just a note: I had a really terrible day, and the entire week shows no signs of improvement, so be warned and expect the next chapters to be dark and painful. 


	28. Interrogations

LOST: one MX muse If found, please return to AliasJaneDoe@hotmail.com (or to the writers of the actual show since their muses are obviously MIA as well).  
  
FOUND: several plot bunnies for varying fandoms (including LOTR, Smallville, and Alias) If you know where I can ship these guys home to, please let me know since I don't have time to properly take care of them and they're driving me nuts with their constant pestering.  
  
Thank you. I now return you to your regularly scheduled story, already in progress...  
  
-----  
  
He might have gotten up if he hadn't slammed the back of his head against the hard floor when he'd collapsed. Brennan suspected he could now add a concussion to his list of injuries. He was experiencing a bit of double vision, and the pain was horrible despite Emma trying to sooth him.  
  
Eckhart's men were quick to move in, instantly restraining Emma. She never took her eyes off Brennan.  
  
Brennan's handler had shown up at some point, and he glared down at the injured elemental. Brennan couldn't resist the urge to kick him - nothing serious, just strong enough to piss him off. He stepped on Brennan's chest and pressed the toe of his boot against his wounded shoulder.  
  
As Brennan cried out, Emma yelled at the man to stop. He proceeded to slide his foot to Brennan's throat, slowly crushing his windpipe until Eckhart signaled him and he grabbed Brennan by the arm instead, forcing his hands behind his back and cuffing them.  
  
When Brennan was pulled to his feet, he glared at Eckhart. "You really want to see round three?" he threatened, his voice hoarse.  
  
Removing a lighter from his pocket, Eckhart held it up to the sprinkler above them and ignited the flame. He stepped back just in time for the spray to miss him and soak Brennan. "Feel free to try."  
  
Eckhart strolled into the dry hallway, and Brennan tried to break free from his handler and lunge after him. He'd take Eckhart on hand to hand.  
  
Several more men helped to restrain him, and Brennan felt the sting of his governor being reactivated. By some miracle, nobody thought to check Emma's. After he was shoved out of the wet room, the men backed off and he dropped to his knees. Then he felt the debilitating pain.  
  
Emma was horrified as Brennan completely collapsed, writhing and kicking against the floor as he struggled with the pain. It was too intense for him to even scream, and nobody was turning it off. Emma tried to read the thoughts of the men around her, wanting to be prepared to fake it if anyone tried to activate her own governor.  
  
"I suppose now I'll need to figure out some form of punishment," Eckhart commented as if he was being terribly inconvenienced. He looked down at Brennan as if his current agony was nothing. In a few more seconds, he would go into convulsions.  
  
The pain finally ceased, and Brennan did his best to ride out the aftershocks while locking Eckhart with a defiant gaze. He tried to stand, but his head was swimming and he lost his balanced, falling back onto his knees once again. His handler placed his hands firmly on his shoulders just in case Brennan found the strength to try anything.  
  
Brennan didn't resist the strong grip. He was having enough trouble just staying conscious. Emma psionically tried to help him, and he sent her a silent thank you before looking to Eckhart again. "Whatever you do, leave Emma out of your punishment. Escaping was my idea."  
  
The smallest hint of a smile crossed Eckhart's face. "Actually, I think it's time Miss DeLauro be brought into the loop."  
  
-----  
  
It was all Emma could do not to panic as she and Brennan were taken back to the still damp sublevels. They were led to a room she'd never seen before, but Brennan had vivid memories of it. The sole purpose of the room was for torture.  
  
As her arms were stretched up over her head and attached to a chain which ran to the ceiling, she tried desperately to read Eckhart. All of his thoughts were dark and terrible. He planned to interrogate them for information about Mutant X. And he intended to uphold his earlier promise to her of having Brennan killed.  
  
Brennan stumbled as he was pushed forward and the guards readied to lock him in the same fashion as they'd already done to Emma. She projected Eckhart's thoughts to him, warning him. He gave the slightest tilt of his of head in acknowledgement, then as his handler roughly yanked him back to his feet, he firmly placed his heels and shoved himself backward.  
  
The force threw both of them to the ground. While down, Brennan swung his legs around and knocked over another guard as well. His handler tried to grab him, but Brennan slammed the back of his head into the man's face, attempting to either break his nose or knock him out.  
  
That only left three men standing, another goon to his other side, Eckhart, and one of the security officers. Emma was fairly impressed and decided they actually had a shot of turning the tables. She jerked her feet up and placed a hard kick to the other goon's back while he was preoccupied with Brennan.  
  
"Thanks," Brennan called to her while rolling away from his handler whose face was indeed bloodied. Since his hands were still locked behind his back, he next slid the cuffs down past his legs and brought them to the front.  
  
The security guard who was standing beside Eckhart moved forward and drew his gun, aiming it at Brennan. At the same moment, the goon Emma had just kicked started to get up. Noticing both actions, Emma gripped her chains tightly and swung herself again with as much force as possible while shouting a mental caution to Brennan.  
  
Picking up Emma's warning, Brennan dove away from the security agent and into the legs of the goon whom Emma proceeded to kick in the back of his head. The combined impacts toppled him over right as the gunshot went off, and the goon hit the floor with a bullet in him that had been meant for Brennan.  
  
Emma just stared at the outcome in shock while Brennan shoved himself up and sprinted for the guard. Another shot went off right as Brennan lunged for the man, and this time the bullet impacted one of the walls. As they both went to their knees from Brennan's tackle, Brennan spun the man around and slipped his chained hands around his neck.  
  
The gun skidded across the floor and stopped at Eckhart's feet. Brennan's handler and the goon who hadn't been shot both stood as their boss bent and picked up the weapon.  
  
Brennan jerked the chain tighter against the security agent's neck. "Everybody back off, and then let Emma go, or he dies."  
  
"Skillfully executed, Mr. Mulwray," Eckhart commented, pointing the gun at Brennan. "However, you failed to take one thing into consideration."  
  
"Yeah, and what's that?" Brennan replied, fairly confident he still controlled the situation. Eckhart couldn't take his shot without shooting his own man first.  
  
Emma suddenly gasped then closed her eyes as she picked up on what Eckhart was about to do. Brennan had chosen the wrong person to take hostage. Less than a second later, the next gunshot rang out. Emma flinched before risking opening her eyes.  
  
Brennan now held the dead agent in his arms. He carefully lowered him to the floor in shock, not believing Eckhart had just killed his own man. Nobody was supposed to have died here.  
  
While Brennan was still stunned, Eckhart crossed the room and held the gun to Emma's head, pressing it against her temple. He motioned for his uninjured men to restrain Brennan. "Now, would you like to try that again, Mr. Mulwray?" Eckhart asked calmly.  
  
Brennan fixed his gaze on a very frightened Emma. "No," he answered, his voice choked.  
  
"Good." Eckhart lowered the gun, and turned to Brennan's handler. "Hold him still."  
  
Brennan was kept on his knees, the two men roughly restraining him. Eckhart walked over to a cabinet that was against the far wall. He opened it and Brennan saw that it was filled with bottles, vials, and syringes of various sizes. He picked up an item and returned to Brennan.  
  
His handler forced his head back, and the other goon held his eyes open. Brennan was hardly able to register what was happening before the drops hit his irises. He jerked fiercely as his eyes burned. The men holding him stepped back, and he crumpled, bringing his cuffed hands to his face and wiping his eyes.  
  
When the feeling of fire subsided, he opened his eyes to an unbelievable brightness. He squinted, trying to force his eyes to adjust. He still couldn't see anything but solid white.  
  
As Brennan panicked, Emma worked at reading Eckhart in attempt to learn what he'd just done. "Brennan, are you okay?"  
  
Disoriented, he shook his head and nodded simultaneously. "I'm alright," he replied slowly, not wanting to sound weak or afraid. "But I think I'm blind."  
  
"I'm sure it's only temporary," Emma told him, wanting her voice to sound uncertain so nobody would suspect she'd just looked at Eckhart's thoughts. However, she reinforced the comment with a feeling of faith that only Brennan would be able to detect.  
  
Brennan stayed motionless, trying to accept the situation. If it was temporary, he could cope. But he couldn't fight while blind, and he didn't think he had the patience to wait it out. What if his vision didn't return for several hours? What if it took days?  
  
Eckhart watched in amusement. "Miss DeLauro is correct. Four out of five people exposed do eventually regain their sight. The chemical's effectiveness after repeated doses is still unknown, however." Clasping Brennan's chin in his gloved hand, he forced his face up so he could look into Brennan's blank eyes. "Perhaps that will be incentive enough to dissuade you from requiring me to use it again."  
  
Jerking his jaw free, Brennan muttered a quiet, "Don't count on it."  
  
"You're slow to learn, Mr. Mulwray," Eckhart stated with disdain.  
  
Pinpointing his voice, Brennan cast a spiteful look in the direction he knew the man was standing. "Why don't you take these cuffs off me and I'll demonstrate for you exactly how slow I am."  
  
His tone held a distinct threat, and Eckhart frowned. "Tie him to the table, face down," he instructed Brennan's handler.  
  
Emma watched as Brennan still attempted to resist, but there was no strength behind his efforts. The table wasn't like those in the labs, this one not equipped with restraints. Brennan's handler seemed to debate that for a moment while trying to decide the best way to tie Brennan. He settled for simply bending him across the surface instead of lifting him to lie fully on the table, applying a shove between his shoulder blades although the force wasn't necessary.  
  
Brennan merely rested his tired body, making no move to get up. He couldn't see, and he couldn't fight, so what was the point? He was going to be tortured in front of Emma, and there was nothing he could do to stop it. He gave some thought to the notion of simply letting himself black out, but then he wondered what Eckhart would do to Emma if he were to lose consciousness and spoil the fun.  
  
His arms were tugged up over his head and the cuffs released only to be replaced by some kind of straps that were wrapped around his wrists before being pulled tight and yanked upward, obviously then stretched and tied to the table legs. His ankles were secured next, and he let his knees buckle, allowing his weight to lie solely on the table. This position seemed to aggravate all of his injuries.  
  
Brennan closed his eyes and told himself to be still. He needed to conserve his strength, whatever little of it there was left. Throughout what came next, he wasn't going to move... and he wouldn't scream. He wouldn't give Eckhart the pleasure.  
  
The goon who'd been shot moaned, and Eckhart glanced over at him. He turned to his still-standing men in annoyance. "Would one of you kindly remove the corpse from the floor and then fetch a doctor for the live one?"  
  
Brennan's handler stayed by his side, but the other man quickly rushed into action, following his boss's instructions. Emma let out a huff of air in frustration, blowing the stray hair from her face. They were down to only two men watching them now, and her own handler had never shown up and was likely still out for the count, but neither she nor Brennan could move, and he was blind.  
  
Switching the eye-drops for a larger bottle, Eckhart then shut the cabinet. "My hospitality only extends so far," he said, directing the comment to both his captives. "You two have worn out your welcome. Needless to say, the free stay is over. I expect you both to start providing me with information."  
  
"Have you been informed yet that you're an ass?" Brennan asked casually.  
  
Eckhart turned to face him. "This might surprise you, but I still don't find your little quips amusing."  
  
Without needing to be instructed, Brennan's handler flipped out the blade of his knife and began to slice Brennan's shirt off. Emma flinched as she watched. Brennan didn't make a sound, but she noticed the tightening of his muscles as his hands clenched into fists. When his shirt was removed, there were several fresh cuts on his back and upper arms.  
  
Eckhart unscrewed the lid of the bottle then held it over Brennan's back. He let several drops of liquid fall. They hit Brennan's skin without any noticeable effect.  
  
Brennan squirmed slightly but then settled, confused. "What are you trying to do, give me the slowest shower in history?"  
  
"When in contact with an open wound, this substance supposedly feels like a lit match." Eckhart poured a few more drops. This time, one landed on the fresh cut Brennan's handler had recently made.  
  
He didn't scream, but Brennan did introduce Eckhart to the more colorful side of his vocabulary. Whatever that shit was, it hurt like a bitch.  
  
"Watch your language around the lady," Eckhart scolded, casting a look at Emma. "She can stop this by providing me with the locations of your safe houses or intel on how to access Sanctuary's computer system. Mr. Mulwray, you can do the same, or simply ask that I quit." He bent down close to Brennan's ear. "Of course, if I grant your request, you and the lovely Miss DeLauro get to trade places."  
  
Both things were purposefully said loud enough for Emma to hear. She settled for continuing to glare at the man.  
  
"Don't tell him anything," Brennan warned her. "I can hold up until our inevitable rescue."  
  
His tone was smug, but she caught the deeper meaning. She was their distress beacon. He wanted her to focus on sending the message. "Okay," she replied softly, then she began trying to get a hit on any of their friends.  
  
Eckhart made some remark about noble sentiment, but she had already stopped listening. She needed to attempt to focus beyond the feelings in this room... beyond Brennan. That task was difficult, but she kept up the attempt even as she heard him curse and knew he'd been hurt once more. He was only swearing to keep from screaming, or from saying anything else. He wouldn't ever betray Mutant X.  
  
Emma eventually picked up a hit on a similar set of emotions. From Jesse, she realized. He was troubled, but he was also tired, on the verge of sleep, and so all of his mental shields were down.  
  
Like Brennan, he was also upset with Adam and in pain, yet he possessed the same unbreakable devotion. Emma thought both of them would follow Adam to hell and back. Despite his flaws, Adam had been more of a father to both of them than their real ones.  
  
In Brennan's case, he'd never known his real father. His only memories were what his mother had told him, stories of a good man who'd loved her and had wanted Brennan more than the world. But he'd died, and Brennan's mother had remarried. Emma didn't know much about his stepfather, except that Brennan wasn't fond of him. She'd never read him since she knew he wouldn't approve, but from the way he spoke about the man, some things were far to clear. And he'd kept the name Mulwray.  
  
In fact, Emma was fairly certain Brennan had been abused most of his life. After his stepfather, falling in with the wrong crowds during his youth and true criminals after that, and recently being used by Lorna, Emma could understand his feelings of worthless brought on by their current situation. He was never treated like he mattered.  
  
However, he'd survived this long despite all that, and Emma prayed that strength would continue to pull him through. He was a fighter. And yet it warmed her heart that underneath his tough image was a person still willing to let others in. He truly cared about her, Jesse, and Shalimar. And he was desperately trying to rid himself of his doubts regarding Adam, for more reasons than that another betrayal would shatter him. He respected Adam, even if he wasn't quite ready yet to trust him like a son would a father. That would come in time.  
  
If he was given that time. Eckhart seemed determined not to allow it. She'd read his mind, and his thoughts spoke more loudly than any words. Brennan would never see Adam again if he had his way. When all was said and done, when he gained his information, when his tests were concluded, and when even that wasn't enough for him, he'd hurt Adam further by permanently taking Brennan's life. And making certain Adam knew every detail, and knew that it was his fault.  
  
She needed to prevent that. She trained her thoughts more intently on Jesse. He'd just had some sort of argument with Adam. Something had happened recently that had deeply upset them both. But Jesse was never angry with Adam. Emma knew how much he loved him, looked up to him, and depended on him.  
  
Jesse's own father was just never around and hadn't understood his son. He also thought there were no problems that money couldn't solve. Jesse still loved him, though. Emma had never met anyone more forgiving and trusting. When they'd first met, Jesse had saved her life and she'd responded by adamantly denying that she was a freak like him. Now she considered Jesse one of her dearest friends. It wasn't in his nature to stay angry.  
  
Yet he was furious now, hurt and feeling helpless. Because of her and Brennan, Emma suddenly realized. Jesse needed them back. They'd become part of his family.  
  
Suddenly feeling a sharp pain, her attention snapped back to Brennan. He was hurting enough that neither of them could prevent it from leaking across the link. She lost her concentration on Jesse, and he slipped to the back of her mind although she desperately tried to keep a lock on him.  
  
But Brennan's pain was so overwhelming. Emma thought she'd surely either stop breathing or vomit, or perhaps just cry out. She fiercely attempted to shove the agony out of her head, directing it aimlessly elsewhere.  
  
-----  
  
Shalimar watched Jesse as she waited for him to drift to sleep. She told herself to relax, but she still felt as wired as when she'd found him. She'd sat by his bedside before when he'd been sick or because his powers were out of whack and Adam felt the need to monitor and mother hen him, but this was different.  
  
Out of the team, she was the only one who'd ever been shot before. Which seemed logically since she was arguably the most reckless, although she preferred to think of it as being assertive. Well, maybe aggressive was more appropriate. The others were all more careful, especially Jesse.  
  
He was supposed to be invincible to bullets. It was a slap in the face that he was the next one to be shot. She would have put decent money on it being Brennan. But never Jesse, not in a million years.  
  
He made a tiny little pained noise, and she quickly moved to his side. His eyes were still closed, so she simply brushed his hair back and kissed his forehead. "Sometimes I think you're trying to worry me," she commented quietly.  
  
As if in response, Jesse gasped and then cried out. His expression contorted in agony.  
  
"That wasn't supposed to be a challenge." Shalimar bent over him again. Hadn't Adam said that he'd given him something for the pain? "Jesse, wake up."  
  
He cringed at her touch and curled onto his side, flinching at the sharp, dramatic flares of pain across his back. His next cry turned into more of a wail.  
  
"Adam!" Shalimar yelled, not bothering to use her ring and just screaming for him again. She held Jesse's shoulder and tried to get him to look at her. When he didn't respond, she activated her com-link. "Adam. Answer me!"  
  
Jesse cried out again, and she hesitated before leaving his side, telling him she'd be right back. She ran to Adam's room and found him switching off his computer screen.  
  
How was it possible he hadn't heard her calling him? He looked over at her, his expression tired, stressed. "Adam?"  
  
"I'm fine," he said quickly in response to the worried way she was looking at him. "What's the matter?"  
  
"It's Jesse."  
  
He stood, and Shalimar didn't wait for further sign that he was following before rushing back to the lab. Jesse was still crying, and she gripped his hand tightly in hers. "Jesse, it's okay. Come on, wake up!"  
  
Adam became instantly disturbed by the fact that the young man showed no signs of waking. He immediately started a scan, not certain what he was looking for. Jesse shouldn't be in this kind of pain. He wondered if it could be merely a nightmare. Getting shot had obviously been a traumatic experience.  
  
"Adam," Jesse suddenly cried.  
  
"Jesse, I'm here, what's wrong?" Adam said hurriedly, trying to find the problem. He quickly reviewed the results of the scan which seemed to show nothing.  
  
"Adam, why aren't you here?" Jesse called out again, it turning into practically a whimper. He opened his eyes but stared blankly past him and Shalimar, not focused on anything. "It hurts..."  
  
"Jesse," Adam said, cupping his face in his hands. "Look at me. Tell me how it hurts."  
  
Closing his eyes, Jesse pulled his head away and curled up on his side again. "Won't tell you anything. I'll never say a word... Won't betray the others. Don't speak..."  
  
Shalimar scrunched her eyebrows in bewilderment at that. She looked to Adam who now appeared very troubled.  
  
He shifted his view to her for a moment. "I'm going to give him something to help him sleep," he told her.  
  
She nodded and kept trying to comfort Jesse while Adam fetched the drug. "It's okay, Jess," she murmured. "Adam's going to make the pain stop."  
  
He faintly whispered a barely audible "Adam abandoned us..." that Shalimar swore she hadn't heard correctly. Then Jesse began to lose consciousness as Adam returned and injected him with the drug.  
  
-----  
  
"Don't say anything," Brennan repeated to Emma yet again. He wasn't worth it. He was in terrible pain, but he wouldn't be the reason for her betraying Mutant X, betraying Jesse and Shalimar. He didn't so much care if they hurt Adam.  
  
Emma was shocked to feel such loathing directed toward their leader. Brennan was trying to force it from his mind, but the thoughts remained. He hated Adam with an anger born out of affection. He thought they could trust Adam. He put his life on the line every day for the man and his cause, but now he considered himself foolish to think it was ever about more than just a job.  
  
Now that Eckhart had captured him, now that he was being tortured, now that he risked losing his mind... Where was Adam now?  
  
Did he even care? Would he shed a single tear when he found out what had been done? Or would he sanction it? Had he? Was science more important to him than Brennan's life?  
  
Adam would risk the world to help a stranger, so why hadn't he lifted a finger to save Brennan? Was he not also one of Adam's so-called children? Or was he merely a child of Genomex, to be used by Genomex however they saw fit? Was there even a difference?  
  
He saw the difference in the way Adam would look at the others. Jesse, Shalimar, and even Emma lately. Such pride, compassion... And then there was Brennan himself - the outlaw that had been frowned upon from the start. Adam had only pretended to see beyond that, beyond the stain of having somebody like him on his noble team, the perfect Mutant X.  
  
Brennan had only been accepted because he'd come as a package deal along with Emma.  
  
*That isn't true,* Emma cried silently, wondering if he could hear her thoughts. Adam himself was a vigilante, not a saint. They were both trying to reform. *You two are more alike than you'll ever realize.*  
  
*Then where is he?* Brennan wondered. He would never leave anyone behind. He might be quite a few rungs below being a hero, but he never turned his back on anybody. If Adam was so much like him, he'd be here now. Where was he?  
  
*Probably becoming a wreck trying to find us.* The words weren't clear, Emma realized, but the emotions accompanying them spoke loudly enough to allow communication. *I promise you, Bren, we will be found.*  
  
She tried to conceal the unspoken, *Before I lose you.* He knew she meant before he went absolutely nuts.  
  
He turned his attention away from her and focussed once more on the pain. He wasn't sure he still wanted to be found, not in the condition he was in now.  
  
More liquid fire was poured over his wounds, and he made a garbled cry, strangling his scream. He writhed against the agony, forcing himself to suffer in silence. Dropping actual matches on his back wouldn't hurt this much. It would probably feel nice in comparison.  
  
Emma shook with the need to cry. She didn't want to watch this any longer. There was so much pain. She had to do something to stop this right now. But she was so completely focused on Brennan that she didn't even realize her mind was still touching Jesse's.  
  
She didn't think she could broadcast anything in the condition Brennan's torment was leaving her thoughts. She closed her eyes against the sounds of his fast, rasped breathing.  
  
"Stop."  
  
For a moment, everything froze. Then she realized that she'd spoken the word aloud. She opened her eyes and let herself look around the room. Eckhart's attention was now on her. Brennan's handler was still watching him squirm as he fought the lessening pain. And Jordan seemed to be staring at everyone.  
  
When exactly had Mehler shown up anyway? Emma hadn't noticed much except for Brennan. But she vaguely recalled the dead body being removed from the room. Then two doctors had come, one leaving with the injured agent while the second stayed. So he was the second? Must be.  
  
She tried to figure out what to say next, and it startled her that Brennan wasn't arguing for her to be quiet. He didn't say anything at all. It was his silence that made her do it.  
  
"Thomas and Eighth. That's the location of our new safe house."  
  
Eckhart turned to Jordan. "Have somebody check on that address."  
  
Jordan gave Emma an apologetic look. "It's a Circle K."  
  
"You're certain, Mr. Mehler?" Eckhart asked.  
  
He nodded. "Yes, sir."  
  
"Eighth Avenue, not Eighth Street." Emma glared at them both. "Northeast corner."  
  
Brennan groaned. "Damn it, Emma."  
  
Blinking, she felt the tears streak her face. "I'm sorry."  
  
"I'll get a team to check it out," Jordan offered, trying not to look at the defeated expressions of the two prisoners. He walked over to the intercom on the wall and started relaying orders.  
  
Eckhart's focus returned to Brennan. He held the bottle over him once more. "This can also be used as a disinfected, and you really should keep your injuries clean," he commented before pouring the full contents across Brennan's back, making sure to hit every cut and dump extra on the bullet wound in his shoulder.  
  
Not having been able to see it coming, Brennan finally screamed - loud and piercing, making his voice hoarse. A single drop had felt like acid. But this... this made him want to die. He had to choke back the bile that tried to rise in his sore throat.  
  
Before setting down the bottle, Eckhart dragged the empty container across Brennan's back, eliciting further cries. He then walked over to Emma. Her head was bowed, and he lifted her chin, making her look at Brennan. "His skin responds beautifully, wouldn't you agree?"  
  
Emma stared at the damage done by the bullet and the dark lacerations marring the once perfect flesh of her friend's back. All his wounds were inflamed. Eckhart's mind was so black with evil. "You enjoy making him scream." That was why he hadn't stopped when she'd told him where the safe house was. Brennan had still been refusing to cry out.  
  
"Would you like me to make him scream again for you?" Eckhart offered, knowing he would gain a sadistic pleasure from brutally abusing somebody who'd been a thorn in his side and whom Adam held dear. "He has a lovely voice."  
  
"Please don't," Emma pleaded. He only said those things to torment her, and it was the cruelest kind of harassment. "I gave you what you wanted. You'll be able to hurt Adam."  
  
Jordan had finished giving instructions for sending out the team, and he approached Eckhart. "If you want Mulwray to stay conscious, you'll need to wash off his back."  
  
"Very well." That said, Eckhart made no move to do so.  
  
Taking the response as permission for him to act, Jordan quickly moved forward. He grabbed Brennan's discarded shirt and began using it to wipe the offensive liquid from his skin.  
  
"Let me help," Emma requested, trying not to sound like she was begging. She needed to be allowed to go to him. "I won't try to run away. You have my word."  
  
She was shocked when Eckhart agreed. "Fine. But only so you can get a closer look at the suffering you caused him." Perhaps next time she would give him the information he wanted sooner.  
  
He motioned for Brennan's handler to release her, and Emma ran to his side the second her hands were freed. Knowing she was being carefully watched, she didn't try to undo his binds.  
  
"He's not going to be satisfied," Brennan struggled to say. The safe house wouldn't be worth enough to please Eckhart.  
  
Emma gently caressed his face and smoothed back his sweat-damp hair. His breathing still sounded wrong. "I'm sorry." She'd needed to offer something. How could she be expected to watch while somebody she loved was tortured?  
  
Jordan ripped the sliced shirt in two, and he handed half to Emma. She softly kissed Brennan's cheek before taking it and looking at him. "There's a bandage on his hip. You might want to make sure nothing soaks through it."  
  
Emma slightly inclined her head in reply as Jordan resumed trying to clean the bullet wound. His part of the shirt was already stained with blood. Brennan whimpered as they tended to him.  
  
As she wiped Brennan's lower back, Emma kept casting short glances at Jordan. He seemed to be trying to help, but she still hated him. He was probably the one who inflicted the wound he'd just mentioned. She tried to ignore him and stay oriented on the task at hand.  
  
Emma could sense Brennan's guilt regarding her. He felt guilty for taking her along on the mission that got them captured, guilty for not protecting her, for needing her gift to make his pain manageable, for depending on her and offering none of his own support in exchange, for making her carry the responsibility of being the one thing in this godforsaken place that was able to stabilize his emotions, for draining her strength and causing exhaustion due to her attempts to keep him sane... For needing her when he'd never admitted to ever needing anybody else.  
  
Brennan let himself cry. For the most part, he was silent, but the tears came freely.  
  
Where did they go from here? What became of them if they were to escape? Or if they never did? He couldn't just throw a switch and return everything to normal. Yet neither could he ask her to stand by his side. He'd lived long enough and seen enough things, felt enough pain, to know that some wounds never fully healed. Some things only grew worse. He clung to Emma now out of desperation, but it wasn't right, and it certainly wasn't fair. At some point, she would need to sever the accidental bond between them.  
  
The connection would need to be cut or risk him pulling her down along with him. What would happen to her if he lost his mind while she was sharing his thoughts? Even if she found a way to save him, she'd share his scars. But if she let him go, he knew that he'd die.  
  
"Don't ever leave me," he whispered, feeling selfish for putting voice to the words. He was begging her to be the first person in his life to ever stay. He didn't care anymore about keeping up appearances, about pretending to be strong. He was vulnerable and he needed her.  
  
After much too short a period of time, Emma was pulled back from his side and her hands were bound yet again. Finally, she spoke to Eckhart. "Why haven't you been asking Brennan anything? He's the one you're torturing."  
  
"Precisely. He's already faced death and has learned not to fear it and to hate me. That hatred will keep him from talking." He lowered his voice as he moved closer to her. "Besides, by now he probably craves the abuse, eager to welcome another death. It's the only peace I'll allow him."  
  
"You're sick." He knew Brennan was her weakness. She wondered if he was going to try hurting her to see if the opposite was also true and if Brennan would crack. She got mixed feelings when she read him. For the moment, he wanted her unharmed, but she doubted that restraint would last. He would hurt her if he didn't get what he wanted from Adam. He wanted a resolution to the war between Mutant X and the GSA.  
  
"And if you're lying to me," he added, "know that there are an infinite number of things which cause excruciating pain before letting the victim succumb to death. You'll give me the rest of the safe houses, and Sanctuary as well, or I will have his body violated a thousand different ways, and I will let him experience death a thousand times without being granted escape into it. And this will continue until his mind is gone and there's nothing left of the man you know."  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
I'm going to back to shorter parts from here on out. I've lost the desire to write MX fic. Maybe I'm just having a bad week (which in RL I totally am), or maybe I've just realized how lame the show is and that it ain't gonna get any better.  
  
On the bright side, I will try to keep writing this and hopefully get back into it -- and with shorter parts, you'll get them more often. I still love the characters, so maybe if I just stop watching the show and write them as I think they were meant to be and not as they currently are, perhaps I'll rediscover my love of the fandom.  
  
Thanks for bearing with me. 


	29. Truths

I'd just like to take a second to apologize for saying that the show is lame. But after we're given episodes like "Crossroads of the Soul," can you really blame me? Besides, I wouldn't be so upset about it if I didn't care. I still consider myself a Mutant X fan, and I will try very hard to simply laugh at any horribly painful eps in the future. I know I can count on the rest of you all to either fix them or at least parody them in fic.  
  
-----  
  
Jesse settled somewhat before surrendering to the drug and fully passing out, too exhausted to even remotely understand the pain that had just assaulted him.  
  
"What was that?" Shalimar asked Adam. It was clear that he was greatly bothered by what Jesse had said.  
  
Adam pinched the bridge of his nose, feeling the start of a nasty migraine headache. "I think Jesse just experienced some sort of post traumatic episode."  
  
"But he was handling things just fine," she replied, shaking her head.  
  
Adam softly touched her arm, knowing how much this was upsetting her. They were both incredibly protective of Jesse. "I think Eckhart interrogated him."  
  
Shalimar visibly paled, but as she looked back up at him, her eyes flashed feral. "I'll kill him."  
  
"I'm not certain of anything just yet. I need to go over the scans again and make sure no other damage was done." He turned to study the monitor as he spoke. "And I'll ask Jesse about this when he wakes. The two of us need to talk anyway."  
  
Shalimar remained planted by his side. She watched over his shoulder despite not knowing exactly what she was looking at.  
  
"There's some slight bruising, but nothing serious," Adam relayed, knowing she wasn't going to budge and would pester him if he didn't share his findings. "Probably from when he was abducted. It doesn't look like there are any injuries other than the bullet wound. Physically, he's going to be fine."  
  
Shalimar fidgeted nervously, not able to stay still. "What if Eckhart got a psionic to poke around inside his head or something?"  
  
"It's a remote possibility." Adam turned to look at her. "But Jesse was only held for a short period of time. It's far more likely that Eckhart was merely trying to spook him. The actual game is between Mason and myself. If he thought he could get anything from Jesse, he wouldn't have returned him along with a tracking device."  
  
At that moment, an alert went off and Adam instantly pulled up the new window. Shalimar stared at the new screen. "What is it?"  
  
"Perimeter security at the new safe house has just been breached," he replied.  
  
"Jesse didn't give away our safe house. He wouldn't do that, Adam." She refused to even think that Jesse had provided their enemy with information.  
  
"I know. If the information had come from Jesse, we would have been getting this alert while I was... occupied." Mason would have struck while he'd been working to remove the bullet from Jesse's back. "But they can't gain access to our server from that location, so we can worry about it later."  
  
"Tell me, Adam," Shalimar said harshly, not believing he was just letting this go, "what would make you worry now?"  
  
Adam spun sharply away from staring at the screen to look at her. "Excuse me?"  
  
"We have a location," she explained, jabbing her finger at the computer. "We couldn't find them, but they came to us. I can be at that safe house in fifteen minutes."  
  
Standing, Adam firmly grabbed her arm. "Don't go."  
  
She furrowed her brow, not understanding. "This is our shot."  
  
"Alone?" He studied her determined face. "You would have no backup, no plan. If this is for real, then they're already gone. If they're still there in fifteen minutes, I can assure you it's a trap."  
  
"I need to find out. Brennan and Emma--"  
  
"What would you have me do?" he interrupted. "Would you have me risk your life for theirs? Risk Jesse's life?"  
  
She glanced back to where Jesse was lying. He could have died. She more than understood Adam's caution. She softened her voice. "What about Bren and Emma?"  
  
"You know you all are more to me than just a team, right?" Adam asked seriously, also looking at Jesse. "You're more than just Mutant X, and sometimes that frightens me."  
  
The emotion is his tone startled her. Adam usually concealed his feelings better than this. She looked down at his hand that was still gripping her arm. He'd grown attached to a team that he was required to put in danger almost every day. She'd never really considered that before, how hard it must be for him.  
  
"Maybe you and Jesse are right," he eventually said. "Maybe there never will be a safe way to rescue the others. If you feel you need to follow this now, then go. I'm asking you not to, but it's your choice."  
  
His concern worried her. "Why are you so adamant about not wanting me to do this?"  
  
He blinked away the moisture from his eyes before it had a chance to form. Adam never cried. "How do you think they knew the location of that safe house? If not from Jesse. The only one that isn't fully active yet. The one we can lose without anybody getting hurt."  
  
It suddenly hit her. Brennan and Emma. She was too shocked to say anything.  
  
"Hopefully this means they're both still alive," Adam said quietly. Dead people didn't hemorrhage information. And knowing his kids, they were more likely to crack to protect the other than save themselves. Held separately, his team would be practically impossible to break. "But we do need to pull them out now. I have every source I know working on this."  
  
"Well your sources obviously aren't good enough!" she replied, her voice rising to a shout before she could lower it to a normal volume again. She turned away from Adam. "I'll call you when I get to the safe house."  
  
Adam let her take a few steps before speaking. There was something she needed to know. "I've been in communication with Mason."  
  
She paused mid-stride. "What..." She kept her back to him, wanting not to have heard what he just said. How could he have talked with Eckhart and not told her? Adam couldn't have kept a secret like that from her.  
  
He wanted to walk over to her but held back. She had every right to be angry, and he could see the tension in her posture. She and Jesse were his team, and he should have made them aware of his actions. "I've already sent an e-mail to Genomex, asking Mason if he's interested in negotiating. I received a reply while you were in with Jesse."  
  
"What did he say?" she asked nervously, knowing the reply must not have been traceable or they'd already be on the trail. Eckhart was too smart for that. She pivoted back around so her gaze could meet Adam's eyes.  
  
"I offered him anything except for you and Jesse. I thought he'd take Sanctuary, my files, or possibly money, but that isn't what he wants. He wants to permanently end the game." They were playing out the final round.  
  
Shalimar didn't understand - didn't want to understand. And yet she asked anyway. "What exactly does that mean?"  
  
"Since I refused to give up you, he offered to release only Emma..." He kept her gaze, never looking away, gauging her reaction. "In exchange for me."  
  
Not able to deal with the thought of Adam turning himself over to their worst enemy, she forced her mind to switch tracks. She might as well know everything before trying to cope with the situation. "What about Brennan?"  
  
Adam nodded his consent. He would answer the question, despite his better judgement. It was time he came clean. He knew the opponent, how he thought, for they had once been friends. "He's the reason I didn't agree to Mason's terms. He won't trade one person for two. He's keeping Brennan. It's possible that means he's already had him killed, otherwise he'd likely be using him as a bargaining chip as well."  
  
"Oh god, Adam..." She stared at him while letting his words sink in. Brennan could be dead. That was what he'd been reading when she'd gone to his room. And he'd told her that he... "How could you get that message and tell me you were fine?"  
  
"Being a part of this team means your lives are put in danger every second of every day. You all knew the risks." He knew he must sound cold and heartless, but he needed to remove himself from any emotional responses. "If I allowed myself to dwell on those risks, I wouldn't be able to do my job. And right now there's a part of me that's telling myself I'm a damn fool for letting you know the contents of that e-mail."  
  
She didn't know whether to be sad or furious. Conflicting emotions waged inside her. "You should have told me sooner! You lied to me, Adam. You hid that information, and I should have known."  
  
"Can you honestly tell me that knowing what you do now - knowing that Jesse was shot, knowing that Emma is being held captive, and knowing that Brennan is most likely dead - knowing this, you can still be out in the field with more on your mind than revenge?"  
  
Most likely dead... That phrase struck her hard. Adam had slipped and told her how he honestly felt. He'd gone from possible to most likely. He actually believed that Brennan had been killed.  
  
Seeming to catch his mistake, Adam moved closer to her, wanting to offer comfort, or support, or something else that he didn't know how to give. "Shalimar..."  
  
"I don't know," she said in response to his inquiry.  
  
Adam couldn't allow her to dwell on her current thoughts. "If you want to beat the odds, you need to be out there telling yourself that Jesse is going to fine, that Emma will be brought home safely, and that Brennan is alive and we will find him. That's what you need to be believing in order to pull off the miracles you do every day."  
  
"What version is the truth? What you live with, or what you tell us?" Did he ever fully disclose anything, she wondered, or were his words always altered versions of his own form of truth?  
  
He sighed deeply before speaking. "Both. Neither. I give you whatever version I think will allow you to sleep at night. My version, and my worries, are my own. As for the current situation, we don't know anything for certain. But if Brennan is dead, then this has reached a very dangerous level and I am not willing to send you out alone. If you go to the safe house, stay out of sight. Look for clues, but that's all. I don't want you out there if you're after blood."  
  
"I'll keep my temper," she reluctantly promised, knowing she'd break that promise if she were given the opportunity of gaining access to Eckhart. If he'd killed Brennan, she'd make him suffer dearly. She would lose control and make the rash decisions Adam was afraid of. She'd prove that he was right to conceal the truth from her.  
  
"If there's nothing there, come straight back," he said in a final word of caution. "As soon as I'm certain Jesse's recovered enough, I'll accept Mason's terms and trade myself for Emma. One way or another, at least I'll find out if Brennan's alive."  
  
She paused but said nothing further. She needed to leave before she could give herself a chance to think. Before she was able to feel.  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
I was just trying to work through writer's block with this chapter. More will actually happen in the next. 


	30. Threats

Since I posted the last part right before ff.net went read only, I didn't get a single review on it except for from Audrey who actually took the time to send a lovely e-mail. So, Audrey, you're my new best friend. :)  
  
-----  
  
Eckhart dismissed the agent and then strolled over to Emma. He looked at her for a moment before striking her with the back of his gloved hand. "I've just been informed that your safe house proved less useful than the Circle K."  
  
"It took us a month to establish that location," Brennan said, angered. "Don't touch Emma again."  
  
Emma glanced over at him. Of course he knew she'd just been hit. He could still hear, and he might have even felt it. She remained silent.  
  
Eckhart never shifted his gaze from her. "You were told the penalty for lying."  
  
"I didn't lie," she ground out, her teeth firmly gritted.  
  
He made some sort of motion in Brennan's direction. "Bring him."  
  
Still standing over Brennan, his handler slipped the blade of his knife under the strap at his wrist and then jerked upward, slicing the bind and carelessly grazing Brennan's fingers. He repeated the process for his other arm and then his ankles. He next grabbed the back of Brennan's neck with one hand and his upper arm with the other and dragged him over to where Eckhart was waiting beside Emma.  
  
Brennan made an attempt to catch himself as he was tossed to the floor, but the effort was in vain and he landed roughly despite it. He hurt to badly to bother with moving, so he didn't try to get up.  
  
From Brennan's position lying on the floor, Eckhart's words sounded like they were drifting down from a great distance, making him larger than life, more powerful, completely in control. And his next instruction was that Brennan be killed.  
  
Out of resentment, Brennan placed his palms flat against the floor and pushed himself up. He was determined to stand. He wouldn't remain on his knees before Eckhart. But before he was fully up, a boot collided with his legs, and the hard kick sent him right back down. He felt Emma's soft mental touch as she offered him support.  
  
Horror flooded Brennan as he wondered if she'd keep her unspoken promise. Would she remain in his mind and ease him through another death? "Emma?" His voice sounded so scared. He hated being afraid. And he hated asking her to witness this, to be present as more than just an observer. That would be bad enough, but what he was asking was beyond reason, and he knew it would likely destroy their friendship, strain any future relationship between them. He had no right to wish it. But he didn't want to be alone.  
  
"I'm right here," she said softly, feeling his torment at simultaneously needing her and not wanting her present. She had no idea of what the consequences might be, but she was all he had, and she wouldn't shield her mind to separate herself from him.  
  
Brennan was kicked again before he could decide if that reassured him or not. The impacts continued, and not being able to see where the blows were coming from left him defenseless. He rolled onto his back from the force of another hit to his chest, and he swore he felt something crack.  
  
Listening to the newly acquired catch in Brennan's breathing, his handler decided he'd likely broken several ribs. Certain the defiant young man had no struggle left in him, he stopped the rain of constant blows, instead gripping the handle of his knife tightly. Stooping, he delivered a quick stab to the center of Brennan's chest, the downward thrust fast and hard. Then he knelt over him, placing one knee on the floor and the other over Brennan's wounded shoulder to keep him in place as he pressed the knife firmly, imbedding it to the hilt, doing the maximum amount of damage possible.  
  
Brennan felt the blade of the knife puncture his skin and slide deep into his body, slicing his flesh as he was cut internally. He felt Emma's abject terror pounding inside his head as if in sync with his heartbeat. And he knew what scared her the most. She was petrified because she had screamed. He hadn't.  
  
He didn't know why he didn't vocalize his pain, but it hadn't been necessary to cry out. He merely gasped ever so slightly, his mouth only open enough to draw the faintest breath. His lack of screaming wasn't due to shock, rather it was that this wound didn't matter. His other injuries wracked his body with an agony that had already taken him to the threshold of his tolerance.  
  
He morbidly wondered why he hadn't passed out. Every ache was sharp, and they thoroughly wrapped him in unrelenting pain. Perhaps there was such a thing as being in too much agony for oblivion to claim you. He was kept awake by the harshness of it.  
  
The knife was twisted, and he could feel himself being torn, standard procedure for keeping a wound from closing. It was infinitely worse that he was blind, as it allowed him absolute focus. He'd also been stabbed before, so there wasn't as strong a sense of fear this time. At least not from him.  
  
He should have been scared, but while his body was in shock, his mind wasn't. He didn't try to understand why. Being stabbed was the most brutal thing that had been done to him, but he was glad it was what was being repeated. It was more gentle because it was so brutal.  
  
Electrocution and drowning weren't common. They were tests designed specifically because of what he was. They were science. But knives, those were normal. And to spill somebody's blood in such a harsh way required malice, hatred, emotion. He much preferred being hated to being an object.  
  
This interrogation was about who he was. Who. Not what.  
  
Remaining still, he didn't fight it. He couldn't move an inch while the blade was imbedded in his chest. It felt like steel ice, sharp and terrible. Somehow he knew it had already found its mark. That's why this time could be so alike to the last and yet completely different.  
  
This time as he choked, he knew with bitter certainty that the coppery taste in his mouth wasn't from his split lip. He was bleeding. Inside and out. He was bleeding...  
  
He needed to prepare himself to be pulled over the edge again. It seemed to take an eternity for the knife to be removed from its place inside him, tearing its painful exit. For some reason, Brennan felt its absence as if he'd already accepted it as a part of him, like its presence - the very intrusion of it - was something to be missed.  
  
Because as it left his body, so did his blood. It was warm and sticky on his skin as it leaked from him. There was no rush, no feel of it swiftly seeping away. He was bleeding out slowly... so slowly. The coldness would enter gradually this time.  
  
Slightly curling his fingertips against the floor, he traced the texture. It had looked smooth, but his light touch proved it be rough, although not textured enough for anybody to pay notice to it. It was normal concrete, and he would die lying upon it.  
  
When he'd been stabbed before, he'd been given back to Emma. She'd held him, soothed him until he'd surrendered to sleep. He could feel her inside his head this time, but he still craved her gentle touch. He hated having her near and not being with her. He'd give anything to have her hold him until this was over. He wanted - he needed - to feel something other than concrete and pain.  
  
But eventually, all feelings would fade until none of them existed. His muscles all tensed, tight as the faintest of spasms assaulted his body in response to the removal of the knife. He choked again, coughing, and the metallic taste grew stronger. He closed his mouth tightly, not wanting Emma to know.  
  
He locked away his fear. Hiding it from her. Hiding it from himself.  
  
His falling descent into the clutches of death would be subtle, a slow journey. He decided he preferred it that way. His previous encounters with the sensation of dying had been preceded by fierce struggles, leading to his being ripped from life. It was better this way, so long as he kept repeating to himself to not be afraid. If there was nothing to fear, he could adapt, adjust himself to the knowledge that with it being this way, being gradual, he could slip through the transition peacefully.  
  
But that wasn't to be so. Emma could read them, and they weren't content to wait. His handler was considering slitting his throat, and Eckhart moved from her peripheral vision to return a moment later with a rag, obviously drugged.  
  
Brennan heard Eckhart's voice loom over him again as he spoke to the other man. "Get on with it before you make any more of a mess. I would like for him to still revive after you're through."  
  
His connection to Emma was enough for Brennan to know Eckhart had given the rag to his handler. It served to warn him to take a breath. Then he held it as the rag was clamped over his mouth and nose.  
  
-----  
  
Pain was everywhere. It soared around him, through him, raced inside his body until there was nothing that didn't ache, throb, or burn.  
  
Jesse tried to open his eyes yet could see nothing. What had gone wrong? Where was Adam? He felt abandoned, afraid. He knew with a sick certainty not his own that he was going to die.  
  
Where was he? He tried to move. Couldn't.  
  
Lying on his back. Agony surrounding every nerve in his body. Cold. So cold. Yet there was also warm. Wet, sticky. He was bleeding. Inside and out. He was bleeding...  
  
There was the texture of concrete beneath his fingertips. Yet that surely couldn't be right. He was supposed to be safe, at home, protected inside Sanctuary.  
  
Eckhart's voice demanded something of him. Jesse shook his head. No. This wasn't real. He was dreaming. Nightmare.  
  
He tried to wake himself and choked. He couldn't breathe. Coughing profusely, he tasted blood in his mouth.  
  
No. No, no, no... Not happening. Not real. Adam would make it stop.  
  
Please... Stop.  
  
He focused all his energy on forcing himself to wake up. Then he felt a familiar presence tickling the edges of his mind. Something in this place had brought him here. Somebody had been looking for him.  
  
*Emma?* His voice stayed only his head, never leaving his mouth.  
  
It had to be her. He knew her. Was she hurt? In too much pain to even realize that she'd reached him? He tried to tell her that he was there, but once more his words reverberated back to him only. The connection was one way.  
  
*Listen to me, Emma. I'm trying to help you. Where are you?*  
  
He was met with a resounding pain. Tried to scream. Couldn't. Still couldn't breathe. Going to die.  
  
And she didn't know. If he was unconscious, if Adam had sedated him, then he was trapped here until she released him. Because it was impossible to break free of the drugs just yet. He'd stay in the blindness of this dream state.  
  
However, the hit she'd gotten on him was indeed fading. She was losing it without seeing it, shoving it away from her along with the terrible pain.  
  
Foolishly, Jesse clung to remains of the link out of desperation. *Emma!* he called out frantically. *Tell me where you are!*  
  
There was no answer. And still he couldn't breathe.  
  
-----  
  
Shalimar paused by Jesse on her way out. She bent to press a brief kiss to his forehead, but then stopped without straightening up. She trained her feral senses to listen. There was a difference in way he was breathing. "Adam. Something's wrong."  
  
He instantly joined her by Jesse's side. "What is it?"  
  
"Listen." She stepped back to give him room.  
  
Adam bent over Jesse and placed his ear to the young man's chest, trying to detect whatever it was Shalimar had heard. He picked up on the problem at the same moment as the monitors signaled the distress. Jesse couldn't breathe.  
  
Damn it. Adam immediately set to work, trying to find the reason for the unexpected alert. Jesse's airway wasn't blocked, so he slipped an oxygen mask over his face before typing a few commands into the computer and running another scan. He didn't know what else to do.  
  
Shalimar started to panic, staring at the screen that was displaying notice of the alarm. Jesse was in serious trouble. She moved back to his side, taking his hand. "Adam, what's going on?" she demanded, worry filling her voice. Had he lied to her about Jesse's condition? "You said there were no other injuries. You said he was fine!"  
  
"There aren't any other injuries! And I thought he was!" he snapped back, dismayed. He had to have missed something. "I'm going to prep him for immediate surgery."  
  
"Why?" She never took her eyes off Jesse, still holding his hand despite it being obvious that he was unconscious. He wouldn't even know she was there, but she offered her support regardless. She wrapped her fingers more tightly around his, willing him to hang on.  
  
"Because I was wrong," Adam admitted. Jesse's readings were all erratic, and he still couldn't pinpoint the cause. He knew he was overlooking something. Jesse wasn't allergic, so he could rule out a reaction caused by the drugs. "There has to be internal bleeding."  
  
"Adam..." Shalimar glanced over at him with tears in her eyes, her voice small and helpless.  
  
Adam didn't need to look to know. All of Jesse's readings were listed on the screen in front of him. He had just stopped breathing entirely.  
  
Adam hurriedly set about retrieving the supplies he needed. Respiratory collapse would undoubtedly be followed by heart failure. If he didn't preempt this now, Jesse was going to die. He rushed back to his side.  
  
The young man now lay perfectly still and all his readings began to fall off. He was going into cardiac arrest. Adam cursed himself for not being prepared for this. He should have been able to predict any complication, and he'd seen none. Now he was being faced with the chance of losing Jesse to a wound he hadn't deemed serious.  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
Danger: Watch out for cliff!  
  
And I blame my mood on the rain and being stuck inside with a cold, not that Valentine's sucked and I now hate all men. Umm, somebody might want to write a nice happy fic for Bren and Jesse to compensate for my cruel treatment of them. Thanks. 


	31. Resignations

-----  
  
Emma thought she heard somebody requesting something inside her head. ~Tell me where you are...~  
  
The voice hadn't come from Brennan, yet neither did it seem real. But nothing felt real anymore. She forced her eyes to look up, and she saw Eckhart still speaking to her.  
  
"Tell me where your Sanctuary is located." When she said nothing, he injected her with Sodium Pentothal. "You've just been given a truth serum. Now, you will tell me all I want to know."  
  
Emma panicked. She couldn't seek Brennan's aid since he was on the verge of passing out, so she probed Eckhart's mind instead. He was bluffing. The drug she'd been given wasn't an actual truth serum as all the movies would make you believe. It would suppress the inhibitory system, remove hesitation, and make her more communicative... but she could still control what she said.  
  
Smiling smugly at Eckhart, she began, "Mary had a little lamb. Its fleece was white as snow. And everywhere that Mary wen--"  
  
At that, her jaw was firmly grabbed. She glowered at Eckhart as he studied her. "Apparently Adam has taught you well." He roughly released her. "Fine. You'll die next."  
  
He turned back to watch Brennan who was still holding his breath but quickly losing the fight.  
  
Emma decided she'd had enough of this. Nobody was going to kill Brennan without killing her first!  
  
Still hanging on to enough awareness to know Emma was going to use her powers, Brennan weakly insisted with a faint mental shove that she not give herself away until she got a message to the others. He could almost swear she'd nearly reached Jesse. For a brief second, he'd felt his friend. Emma needed to get that link back, but he knew she couldn't control her powers when stressed. All she could focus on was him... because earlier, he'd asked her to.  
  
True, she could probably save him now, easily get the man to drop the rag, but they would be no better off. She would still be chained, and he was bleeding internally. She would give up their one advantage and get them nowhere. It would only delay things. But, oh god, he didn't want to die again!  
  
As she picked up his last thought, she prepared to fight. She had to use her power. Brennan believed her gift was their only hope, but they'd find another way. She focused on his handler and concentrated on readying herself to make him think the rag was burning his hand.  
  
Picking up on her plan, Brennan mentally screamed at her not to do it. Right when she was almost ready, he did the only thing he knew could stop her. He latched on as tightly as possible to the connection between them, needing it if he were to survive this, then he let go of his fear and took a breath.  
  
It would have happened anyway, he tried to assure her as he felt her wave of anger at his action. He'd needed to breathe, and this would have happened regardless of anything she might have done. He then lost his connection to her and could focus only on his inability to draw another breath. His grip on reality slipped a fraction too far, and he lost it, lost her, lost any remaining will to fight.  
  
As he completely surrendered, his entire chest ceased up, his throat tight, and the hand remained over his mouth and nose as he became unable to move. He knew the drug that soaked the rag had paralyzed his lungs. If his airway wasn't blocked, he'd still be unable to breathe. There was only a darkness replacing the white, so he let his eyes fall closed. Then everything went silent and numb.  
  
Emma stayed with him, offering any comfort she was able to direct to him. But the blackness was overwhelming, the silence seemed like a loud hum, and she was forced to pull back slightly from his mind when she could no longer feel anything. The numbness was oppressing. She suddenly grew cold.  
  
"NO!" Emma screamed loudly as Brennan slipped away and all links to her mind were severed. She jerked against her restraints, wanting to run to him. His handler stepped back, shoving Brennan from him and letting his bloodied body fall to lie lifelessly on the stained cement floor. She shook her head and kept repeating "no," the word now becoming quiet. She couldn't feel anything from him. Even terror was better than sensing nothing.  
  
When it fully hit her that Brennan was dead, she found her voice again and resumed shouting. "You son of a bitch!" she yelled viciously, not certain if she meant Eckhart or Brennan. "How could you? I will never forgive you for this. I HATE YOU!"  
  
Eckhart took in the scene with satisfaction before turning his attention to Jordan who was standing in silence, looking rather pale. "Gag our little lamb," he ordered, seeing it was clear she'd offer no further information at the moment.  
  
Jordan obeyed, but he whispered a quiet apology to Emma as he did so. She didn't care if he meant it or not. She merely began to sob hysterically. Those bastards had killed Brennan again. Nothing could have been more terrible.  
  
They'd done it again.  
  
She screamed against the material that gagged her cries. He'd died to protect her secret. She felt sick. She could have stopped this! But she'd let him die.  
  
-----  
  
Acting quickly, Adam had already administered more drugs and taken every precaution in the hope of preventing v-fib. He'd be damned if he was going to let Jesse die on the table! Not from this. Not Jesse.  
  
Dear God, not Jesse...  
  
He stabilized somewhat, but still wasn't breathing. Adam knew he only had precious few seconds before he would be faced with Jesse coding again, and the second time would be unavoidable.  
  
Adam glanced over at Shalimar who was clinging to Jesse's hand, holding it tightly in both of hers. He doubted he could count on her to assist if the need for CPR arose. She was too distraught to focus.  
  
But why wouldn't she be? Jesse had already gone pale. Shalimar knew enough to realize that Adam was losing him. He silently swore and pleaded for Jesse not to crash. He needed to get him breathing again. Now.  
  
Pulling the oxygen mask from his face and tossing it aside, Adam gently adjusted his head into the proper position and started mouth to mouth. He watched to make sure Jesse's chest rose, then waited a moment before blowing into his mouth again.  
  
Shalimar just kept clutching his hand, intertwining their fingers as Adam worked to get him breathing. He wasn't having any luck. "Come on, Jesse, breathe..." she begged him.  
  
After several more breaths, Adam did swear. Aloud. Jesse couldn't die from a gunshot wound. Adam wouldn't allow it! He berated himself for having chosen to remove the bullet while onboard the Helix. The risk obviously wasn't as minimal as he thought. Jesse should have been rushed to a hospital or straight to Sanctuary - damn the consequences. He blew more forcefully into his mouth, inflating his lungs once more and praying for him to start breathing on his own.  
  
Jesse remained unresponsive to his attempts, and Adam hated himself all the more. What the hell had he been thinking? It had been foolishly arrogant of him to think he could simply remove the tracking device. He'd been smug in believing that he'd so easily outwitted Mason. After removing the bullet, he should have run every possible test to be certain Jesse was alright. He trusted a single scan that said Jesse was fine, and he'd already decided there had been no complications. If Jesse didn't start breathing, if the faint pulse vanished, and if Jesse died...  
  
If Jesse were to die, it would be Adam's overconfidence that had cost him his life. He couldn't handle the guilt. He'd had the audacity to scold Jesse for his actions. He'd only been trying to help his friends, and Adam should have had his back. None of this ever should have happened.  
  
"Jesse, please forgive me," he pleaded silently before one final attempt to encourage him to breathe.  
  
Still nothing. Reluctantly, Adam gave up on that approach. Jesse wasn't going to start breathing, not without assistance. "I'm going to intubate him," he relayed to Shalimar before momentarily leaving their side.  
  
She waited in fear as he returned and inserted the tube down Jesse's throat. Adam was forcing him to breathe. She couldn't believe he was needing to take such drastic measures. She wouldn't let herself think this was that serious. Adam had told her he was going to be fine. He couldn't die.  
  
After successfully inserting the tube into Jesse's windpipe, Adam let himself relax ever so slightly. At least now, although aided, Jesse was breathing and his readings were returning to normal. With the task done, Adam still stayed bent over Jesse in a fatherly way, and Shalimar could almost swear she saw a tear streak the older man's face. He'd been scared.  
  
Adam softly touched Jesse's cheek, smiling as he continued breathing. "Good job, Jesse... Keep hanging in there for me, okay?" He eventually looked up at Shalimar. "He's stable for the moment."  
  
"What do we do now?" she asked, all thoughts of her trip to the safe house forgotten. She couldn't leave if Jesse was still in trouble.  
  
"I go over all the previous scans and then run new ones," Adam told her, already headed for the computer. He didn't accept the current report of "unexplained respiratory failure," not when the result had nearly been cardiac arrest. "Unexplained" wasn't good enough when dealing with Jesse's life. He'd come way too close to almost losing him.  
  
-----  
  
"Wake him as soon as his heart starts itself."  
  
Jordan nodded automatically and moved to Brennan's side. He wasn't breathing, and a quick check revealed that there was no pulse. He forced himself not to glance up at Eckhart for fear of saying something he'd regret. Mulwray had been correct about the evilness of the man for whom he worked.  
  
This hadn't been about testing the abilities of the strand. This time, it was only torture.  
  
If he'd had the paperwork with him, Jordan would have turned in his resignation on the spot. However, after what he'd been witness to, he doubted he would be allowed to simply walk away. Leaving would surely have dangerous repercussions.  
  
"Let's get him back up on the table," he instructed Brennan's handler.  
  
As they lifted him, Jordan's gaze darted to DeLauro for a split second. She started straight back, something about the way she was watching him making him shiver, almost as if she was looking directly into him. Jordan most definitely didn't like being the target of her focus, still certain he could feel her eyes on him after he looked away.  
  
They placed Brennan on his back on the table, Jordan carefully resting his pale body in the small pool of his own spilt blood since there was nowhere clean to lay him. Against the dark table, the red seemed deeper, almost black.  
  
Emma's eyes shifted to lock on the horrible scene. It was terrible and yet close to being beautiful. Brennan lay dead across the table, his skin smeared with streaks of blood, a picture reminiscent of a sacrifice to a pagan god. Yet at the same time, he looked more at peace than she'd seen him look in days, possibly in the entire time she'd known him. His body held no tension, relaxed with no sign of hidden pains. She wanted all of Eckhart's men to back off and let him rest, leave his slumber undisturbed until he could fully heal.  
  
Although it wasn't likely that would ever happen.  
  
-----  
  
Brennan took in the scene with an almost detached interest. He looked at the body without fully accepting that he was looking at himself. It was some other man, beaten and broken, but not him. It couldn't be him.  
  
How was it possible for him to even be witness to this? He was blind. He was also dead. Dead, and standing in a room staring at his own body. That was fairly disconcerting. One normally never got the opportunity to observe his own death. Perhaps his mind was playing tricks on him. A rather silly notion seeing as he was most likely also brain dead at the moment. He might have simply lost his mind. That would explain this. Or maybe he'd actually given up this time and crossed over. This was all some out of body experience before whatever came next.  
  
He tried to turn away but the image didn't change. He was frozen, only able to see things from a single perspective. He was occupying a still- frame of time. Strange. Or at least it was for a brief moment before he realized where exactly his point of view must have originated. He could see himself, Jordan, his handler, Eckhart... He could see everything except for Emma.  
  
Because what he was currently seeing, he saw through her eyes. He willed himself not to accept anything else through the link. He didn't want to know her emotions. He didn't even want to know that she was gazing at him. She had watched him die.  
  
Damn it, Emma, close your eyes.  
  
That wasn't even him. It was only his body... his lifeless, ruined, sickening body. God, he wanted to throw up. That couldn't be what he was now. How the hell was he supposed to face Emma after she saw this?  
  
He willed himself to move farther back from his body, but he remained motionless. Jordan bent over him, checking for a pulse, waiting. Those twisted bastards were going to pull him back again.  
  
Don't find it. Please, just don't...  
  
He could hear their voices now. The image didn't match the sounds, and he wondered how much he'd received from Emma's mind and what he was actually hearing through his own ears. It was all too jumbled and distorted to distinguish the sources or the words.  
  
Then somebody found a heartbeat. And Brennan was almost shocked when his numbness turned to anger. He would not be put through this. He silently apologized to Emma, but he just couldn't. He'd thought he would be able to, but he couldn't go back to that. Not after seeing it. Not again. He stared at himself with hatred.  
  
No, damn you. Do not start breathing!  
  
He forced himself to hold his breath. He would not be brought back this time. Never again. He didn't want to feel the life seep back into him. He wanted to stay dead. In death there would be no more pain.  
  
He was a coward to want to leave Emma alone, but he couldn't claim to have the courage to survive this. He had asked her to stay with him, to help him... but in truth, he couldn't handle it. He knew that now. Even with her, he couldn't cope. So he didn't want her to care. He'd rather she watch him die. However bad, it would worse for her if he were to wake up. She was linked to his thoughts, and he was certain to be mad now.  
  
He had to be mad... for he wanted to die.  
  
Everything spun to gray and he felt somebody touching him, coaxing him back to life. He was lying on his back and Jordan was standing over him, talking to him.  
  
Don't touch me.  
  
His senses were slowly returning to him along with awareness. He fought the involuntary responses to wake, to breathe, to open blind eyes.  
  
You must not breathe. Fight it. Don't breathe.  
  
Cloth touched his skin, and he could feel the tickle in his nostrils as the freshly drugged rag was held under his nose. He inhaled the sharpness of it, bitter and also sweet as honey, and he coughed furiously. He snapped open his eyes but saw only white with gray blurs. His body arched up slightly against restraining hands as the pain claimed him once more.  
  
"Welcome back," Jordan's voice said softly as he continued to cough. "Come on, deep breaths."  
  
Brennan pulled away from him, feeling disgusted and violated. He wasn't tied at the moment, so he rolled onto his uninjured shoulder and tried to find the edge of the table. Then he forced himself to vomit, praying that heaving could remove the feel of the abuse from him. The only thing he retched up was a small amount of blood.  
  
"It's the aftereffects of the drugs," Jordan told him, bracing his aching body. "The sickness will pass shortly."  
  
Brennan didn't listen. It wasn't the drugs or the pain, and he doubted that he'd ever stop needing to be sick. He now possessed a full understanding of this godforsaken experiment; he knew what was being done to him and didn't even have ignorance to shield himself with. He'd been killed - literally dead - and then forced back to life against his will. He felt as if he'd just been raped.  
  
-----  
  
The overwhelming need to comfort Brennan made Emma physically hurt. She wanted nothing more than to hold him and cry, let him cry. But as awareness of the situation returned, awareness of her returned, he slid on an emotionless mask, allowing her nothing. He was determined not to feel.  
  
"It doesn't matter, Em." He said it in a voice that was meant to reassure her. Confirm that he was still alive and could just shake this off. "It doesn't matter."  
  
But she could feel his thoughts again, despite him now struggling to force them away, and she knew his words were far from the truth. He was ashamed to have her so much as look at him now. After what had just happened, he doubted everything. Although his memory was still intact since the time his body had just been dead was so brief, he didn't know who he was any longer. What he was.  
  
And Emma cried when she sensed the part of him that thought it would have been better if he hadn't woken up. He'd actually resisted. Eventually he knew that he'd be permitted to sleep, and the flesh would finish to heal. Yet he believed with every death, part of his spirit slipped away, and where he was now - *what* he was at this very moment - however much alive and breathing, he was merely a body lying on a table. Only his body, not him. Whatever was left of who he was, it was such a small part as to be almost completely insignificant.  
  
There was an entire sea of emotion, and he was tossing up dozens of mental shields in an attempt to protect himself, or rather remove himself from it. Pain, fear, hatred, anger, shame, defiance, acceptance, hope, surrender...  
  
She felt everything.  
  
He felt nothing.  
  
Move guards entered the room then, probably called to take them back to their cell, and Brennan was pulled to his feet without resistance. He was completely resigned. They had made him. They owned him.  
  
Emma looked into his vacant eyes, not only blind but also dead in that they held absolutely no emotion. He'd given up. *No... Brennan, please...*  
  
He didn't acknowledge her mental nudges. He wanted her to cut their link.  
  
*Damn it, Brennan, you can't do this! Please... I need you.* Without his permission, she forced her way in past the edges of his mind and used her power on him. More than just to influence his thoughts, she actually attempted to permanently alter them.  
  
He didn't fight her. He didn't care about anything. He just wanted to sleep.  
  
After silently apologizing, Emma stopped trying to control his pain and momentarily tore down all his barriers. He physically screamed at the onset of everything he'd been blocking. She hated herself for what she'd just done, but at least he'd felt it. Instantly, she rebuilt and rearranged the mental walls, destroying some things and amplifying others.  
  
Brennan gasped at the harsh return to reality. He couldn't ignore this, and he couldn't wish for oblivion. He didn't know whether to thank Emma or hate her. He didn't even know if her alterations would hold.  
  
It was okay for him to be angry. She could live with him hating her, so long as he also still hated them. Anything was acceptable except for surrender.  
  
But he couldn't be angry. She'd stayed with him. How could he hate for that? Despite everything, she refused to leave him alone, and he only needed to learn to cling to that instead of fight it. She wasn't everyone else, and she wouldn't hurt him if he allowed himself to trust her. *Thank you.*  
  
Ever so slightly, she smiled. *Just stay with me, Bren. No matter what, we're in this together.*  
  
Agreeing, Brennan braced himself for whatever was to come next.  
  
"Clean up Mr. Mulwray and get him some fresh clothes," Eckhart ordered. "Then we'll be proceeding with the next test."  
  
Jordan bit his lip, but nodded and then forced out a "Yes, sir."  
  
Eckhart's gaze fixed on Brennan again momentarily. "There's no need for the next session to be so severe; however, in order to teach you not to run again..." His next words were delivered to the men restraining Brennan. "After that's done, take him back to the lab. Break both of his legs."  
  
Brennan's reply caught in his throat. He couldn't be serious?! His guards started to drag him toward the door and into the hall and he was too afraid to speak, but his mind cried out to Emma.  
  
Eckhart turned to go as well, but the man who held Emma called him back. "What do we do with the girl?"  
  
Straining against the men at his sides, Brennan planted his heels and refused to move until he heard the answer. Dear God, if they hurt Emma... he didn't know what he'd do.  
  
Removing his glasses, Eckhart pinched the bridge of his nose to relieve his tension. These two members of Mutant X were causing him far too much stress. He was through with trying to make deals. He finally pushed his glasses back into place and spoke. "Kill her. See to it that Adam receives the body."  
  
He would make it clear to Adam that their little game had reached a new level. If Adam refused to fold, Eckhart would deliver Mulwray's body next, followed by Kilmartin if he decided to pull any more foolish stunts. He had no doubt the message would be clear, and it was much easier than merely torturing his "children." Adam wouldn't have the heart to stay in the fight.  
  
"YOU CAN'T!" Brennan yelled, finding his voice even though it still came out rasped. His governor was quickly set off, bringing hot tears to his eyes. He dropped to his knees and then screamed from the pain in his shoulder due to his arm still being firmly held. His guard finally dropped him and he left a streak of blood on the floor as he curled up onto his side. "Why do you hate Adam so much..."  
  
Eckhart stared down at him. "Are you aware, Mr. Mulwray, that the worst betrayals always come from either family, lovers, or close friends?"  
  
Brennan coughed several times, trying to breathe and control the pain. "If you tell me Adam was one of the first two, I think I'll vomit." He most certainly did not want to picture Adam as Eckhart's brother or... well, the second thing was too gross to even imagine. Them having ever been friends was disturbing enough.  
  
Jordan turned to Eckhart. "We already started the next phase with DeLauro. Switching subjects now would be a considerable set-back," he stated. "Mulwray's the troublemaker. The girl is easily controlled."  
  
"Fine," Eckhart sighed. His plan could wait awhile longer, and perhaps Adam would respond to his e-mail. "Just get them out of my sight. And from now on, DeLauro is to be kept in solitary confinement."  
  
Nodding sharply, Jordan quickly took Emma from the other guard and secured her hands behind her back. "Wait for me before proceeding with Mulwray," he called to the other men as they roughly yanked Brennan back up. Then he forced Emma in the opposite direction that they were taking him.  
  
She stared over her shoulder at him. He did the same, his blank eyes searching in her direction with a look of desperation, and she knew exactly what it meant. If they were to survive this, she needed to get Adam here, now.  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
Huge thanks to everyone who sent e-mails for the last chapters due to ff.net acting weird and not accepting them. I really appreciate it. But I think everything is back working normally now, so feel free to resume posting comments here. I get a sadistic pleasure from watching the number of reviews go up. *grin* Although lengthy e-mails are even better. Comments that are too long to leave here are definitely VERY nice. 


	32. Cries

A couple notes:  
  
I got my first real flame on this story. Considering it was left for chapter 32, I'm going to assume the person who left it is still reading the story. If so, would you mind telling me why you hate this fic? You sounded like you're just bitter that I have a lot of reviews. Well, I agree with you that there are other stories better than this one. And some of them have piles more reviews than I do. Check the other fandoms. As for Mutant X, there's one obvious thing that comes to mind. This story does have the most reviews, but it is also the longest one out of all the MX stories posted here. So other than that, was there something specific that upset you? My lost muse, over abundance of torture (did warn about that, though), lack of Shalimar, or just a generally bad writing style??? Help me out here. Constructive negativity is always appreciated. Thanks.  
  
Slashers, you guys are a bad influence. This chapter goes out to the lot of you. Your feedback is still the most fun to read.  
  
BabyD, what was it that you were going to e-mail me regarding? I'm curious.  
  
Ace... *just stares at you for a minute* Okay, break them?! Did you seriously just say that? *shrug* Well, alright!  
  
-----  
  
-----  
  
Shalimar pulled her chair back over to Jesse's bedside. She slipped his hand into hers and decided to keep vigil until he woke. Adam said he was sleeping naturally now, not unconscious or only out due to sedation. She watched him closely for any signs of pain or problems with his breathing, but his rest seemed to be peaceful enough.  
  
Gently, Adam placed his hand on her shoulder to get her attention. "I'll be in the other room," he told her. "I'm going to make a conference call to an old associate of mine. He's a doctor and we can trust him."  
  
She nodded without looking up. It worried her that he was seeking an outside opinion. She knew it meant he still couldn't figure out what was wrong with Jesse. He'd almost died and Adam was stumped as to why.  
  
Closing her eyes, she listened to Adam's footfalls as he left the lab. She didn't like this at all. Silently, she prayed for Jesse's condition to remain stable.  
  
-----  
  
Brennan tried to focus on remembering his meditation techniques, and he calmed his breathing, attempting to relax. Panicking would only make the situation worse. Although he wasn't certain it was possible to get much worse than being strapped to a chair in one of Eckhart's labs. The only bright point was that he'd been given fresh clothing first.  
  
The waiting ceased when he heard somebody enter, and he opened his eyes, training his vision on the gray blob that was moving toward him. It was fairly disconcerting that his sight was taking so long to return. He blinked several times, but it didn't help any.  
  
"Still blind?" a familiar voice taunted.  
  
Brennan tensed, identifying the man as being Emma's handler. Apparently he'd waken up from the little jolt Brennan had given him. Hopefully he wasn't the type to hold a grudge.  
  
Something was placed against his lips, and Brennan clenched his jaw, going with the assumption that it was a cup. "Drink," Emma's handler commanded.  
  
When Brennan refused, a hand moved over his nose. Closing his eyes and trying to slip back into his meditation, Brennan decided to wait the other man out. He would hold his breath until he passed out before willingly drinking whatever was in the cup.  
  
After a little over a minute, the hand was lifted from his face only to be curled into a fist and slammed into Brennan's stomach. Having no warning that the blow was coming, Brennan automatically gasped. Liquid was quickly dumped into his mouth and he accidentally swallowed a rather large amount before spitting out the rest.  
  
The cup was shoved back against his lips once more when another voice spoke from the lab door. "Leave him alone and get out."  
  
The figure at Brennan's side stiffened, and he heard the footsteps of the other approach. The cup was then taken from Emma's handler, and there was a pause long enough for its contents to be inspected.  
  
"I need to record his vitals and get another blood sample before the next test. Go wait outside."  
  
Emma's handler patted the top of Brennan's head. "You have a nice day now." Then the gray blur moved away and Brennan figured he'd gone to stand outside the lab door.  
  
Brennan turned to the other blur in his vision. "Jordan! You have to help me." He was incredibly grateful that he'd spared Emma from Eckhart's wrath, but now he was the one who needed help. "What did he just give me?"  
  
"It's a form of stimulant, originally derived from an aphrodisiac. It enhances physical stimulation." He tried to catch Brennan's blank eyes to see if his meaning had sunken in. "Pleasure or pain."  
  
Brennan cursed. "You're telling me that son of a bitch just ultra- sensitized me? Right before you guys plan to break my legs."  
  
Jordan turned away. "Yes," he answered, the word clipped.  
  
Breathing slowly, Brennan forced himself to stay calm. If they went through with this, he knew the agony he'd experience would be unimaginable. He needed to convince Jordan to stop the next test. It was his only hope.  
  
After retrieving three pressure bandages, he returned to Brennan's side and freed his right wrist then pushed up his shirt. He placed the first bandage over the knife wound. "Lift your arm," he instructed. When Brennan obeyed, Jordan inspected the bullet wound next. "You're lucky. It was a clean shot."  
  
As he applied another bandage, Brennan stared at him, wincing slightly from the pain despite the touch being light. "Jordan..."  
  
He moved to Brennan's back without replying. He carefully placed the final bandage and Brennan trembled under his touch. When he was finished, he slid the shirt back into place then moved to redo the restraint.  
  
Brennan felt it against his wrist. "Don't..." he pleaded.  
  
"There's nothing I can do to stop what's going to happen." Jordan locked down his hand then removed a syringe from his pocket, but it wasn't for drawing blood. "It's morphine," he explained since Brennan was unable to see it. "There'll be a slight prick."  
  
His last comment was enough to infuriate Brennan. "I've been stabbed twice where I got to enjoy the full length of a blade imbedding itself in me without warning. But you know what, thank you for informing me in advance every time you're gonna stick me with an itty bitty needle. I really appreciate it!"  
  
He quickly wiped the sarcasm from his voice and mumbled an apology. Jordan wasn't somebody he wanted to snap at.  
  
"God, you have to try to prevent this," Brennan begged as he was given the drug.  
  
Jordan rubbed the skin after removing the needle. "That will kick in soon. I wasn't even supposed to give you this. And you should know that it's not enough to counteract the..." He trailed off. Brennan was fully aware of his situation.  
  
"You know what they're going to do to me." Brennan's eyes pleaded with him, trying to see well enough to make eye contact but failing. "I saw the look on your face, Jordan. The first time I died, you were appalled by what you'd done. Is it that much less terrible knowing that I'll recover? You can just keep killing me with a clean conscience? Because one of these times, I'm not going to wake up. Then you *will* be guilty of murder... Trust me, that isn't something you want weighing on you."  
  
He paused for a moment, wondering if his words were doing any good. "You don't want this," he added more firmly.  
  
"It's not up to me." So far, dealing with Brennan had actually moved Jordan up the GSA ladder. If he didn't give a damn about hurting him, he'd stay on top. Letting emotions get involved would screw up his entire career.  
  
After checking the door to be sure no guards were watching, Jordan pressed a quick kiss to Brennan's lips.  
  
Brennan was too shocked to respond. He was being kissed by Jordan. By a Genomex employee. A GS agent. The enemy...  
  
He was being kissed by another man. For a brief moment, he forgot that should have repulsed him. After all, he was forming deep feelings for Emma. Yet, for that second, a small flicker of time, he had hope. He'd managed to manipulate Jordan. Before he could decide if it was worth the benefit to return the kiss, the lips left his and pulled back. And at Jordan's next words, Brennan remembered exactly why he should have been disgusted.  
  
"I'm sorry."  
  
The kiss wasn't about letting him go - Jordan was writing him off. He hadn't played him well enough. Brennan felt sickened by himself. Just how far would he have taken things for a shot at freedom?  
  
When Jordan turned away, Brennan spit then wiped his mouth on the shoulder of his shirt before trying to call the young man back. "JORDAN!" he shouted desperately, his voice now showing his hatred. "Don't leave me! Don't you dare leave me!"  
  
But even without the aid of his vision, Brennan knew that Jordan didn't look back.  
  
-----  
  
Emma sat in her cell with her arms wrapped around her knees, rocking back and forth and crying. Brennan was broadcasting his disappointment, resentment, and fear so loudly she could swear everyone on the planet must hear it. It stretched across the complex and seeped into her as if they were physically touching.  
  
They should have fought. She should have protected him, not let him be taken from her. She should have fought to the death to prevent this. Yet that was exactly what he hadn't wanted.  
  
"Oh, Brennan, I'm so sorry."  
  
When it was time, Emma buried her face in her hands. Brennan snapped, consumed by an overwhelming urge to strike back, to flee, to do anything to escape. His restraints were adjusted so that they fit extremely tightly, yet he thrashed anyway. Panicked, he yanked at his binds until his hands were slick with blood, but he still couldn't slip out of the restraints.  
  
Alone, he was fighting with all that he had left... more. But he was overpowered, held down. He dislocated his thumb again, managing to get one hand free as another strap was pulled into place across his chest. His other wrist was raw and badly bleeding from his attempts.  
  
His fist made contact with somebody before his arm was grabbed. Then he was hit roughly in return and the coppery taste of his blood filled his mouth, leaving him to wonder if they hadn't just broken his jaw. But the blow wasn't enough to knock him out, so he continued his vain struggle. He refused to allow them to do this.  
  
"God damn you, Emma, focus," she scolded herself. "He's counting on you, so get Adam here."  
  
Sniffling, she wiped her face again. Concentrate. Brennan had gone through death to give her this chance, and she would not - could not - blow it. She had her psionic message ready, she only needed to send it.  
  
"Fuck, Adam, where are you?" she screamed, pounding her fists against the floor. They were hurting Brennan! She ripped tendrils of thought through the distance between her and the Sanctuary of Mutant X, savagely searching. "HEAR ME!"  
  
She slammed her fingers down once more and slid them along the floor, closing her eyes and collapsing, weak from the exhaustion of constantly using her gift. Even though she could hear Brennan clearly without conscious effort, Adam was an entirely different story. And the anguished cries washing over from Brennan only made focus more difficult to attain. Emma could feel the restraints that held him, fastened even more securely, and the hands on his shoulders forcing him down hard enough to leave deep bruises. His mind was screaming.  
  
Without thinking, she dropped all her shields and opened herself fully to Brennan's mental wails. He wasn't alone in this; she'd be there with him. She sensed someone touch his injured jaw and slip something into his mouth, instructing him to bite down. The pain would be incredible.  
  
She tried to comfort him, wanted to help him fight. She couldn't stop this with her trapped in another room - she was too nervous and her power wasn't strong enough. And they'd know. They'd know and they'd use the governor again. She couldn't alert them yet. She needed to send her message first.  
  
Reaching out desperately again with her mind, she resumed the search for the leader of Mutant X. She needed to get help here, and now. Now before further damage could be done to the person she cared about more than anything else.  
  
It was sheer brute strength that held Brennan in place, and he still wouldn't surrender. He would never comply, and they'd be required to hurt him far more than was necessary in order to force him into submission. He knew that. As he knew his efforts were pointless. Yet he couldn't allow himself to willingly submit to this. He was so focused on the men who were preparing to break his legs that Emma feared he couldn't sense her with him. And she feared that, emotionally, he would never heal from what was about to be done.  
  
She'd pulled him back from the edge once, but twice was a lot to hope for. And hope was scarce inside this prison Eckhart had created to hold them.  
  
She finally managed to get her hit on Adam right before it happened, sending everything she could to him in one solid torrent. Then she screamed along with Brennan, her voice reverberating off the room's white walls as they both passed out.  
  
-----  
  
Adam suddenly fell to knees as the pain overwhelmed him. He'd just ended his call and reached blindly for the wall in order to support himself, but then he had to clutch his head. He couldn't hear anything except for the screams in his mind.  
  
Shalimar, who'd ventured out of the lab in order to see if he'd made any progress, ran to his side as he collapsed. "Adam!" she shrieked, horrified. He seemed to be in agony.  
  
Instantly dropping down beside him, she tried to determine the problem. A check of his pulse proved it to be rapid, and his breathing was labored. First Jesse and now Adam... "No, not you too," she cried, pulling him close and clinging helplessly to him.  
  
"Adam, what's wrong?" she pleaded. "Tell me what to do... I don't know what I'm supposed to do..."  
  
He didn't respond, and the fear claimed her thoughts. What if Adam stopped breathing like Jesse had? What if the bullet really hadn't been the cause of the trouble? What if this was a virus, or a psionic attack, or... she didn't know what.  
  
"Somebody help!" she screamed, not bothering to use the com-system and just shouting. There wasn't anybody to hear her cries anyway.  
  
So she simply held Adam more tightly, nervously trying to soothe him. She stared up at the ceiling high above her and suddenly felt very small and alone within the protective shelter of their safe haven. Something had breached their security and she couldn't even identify it in order to fight it.  
  
Her yell became a useless whisper, almost a prayer. "I need help..."  
  
-----  
  
Was Shalimar screaming?  
  
Jesse forced himself up out the foggy haze of sleep. He tried to ask what was happening, but something was choking him, preventing talking. His hands instantly flew up and searched for whatever was obstructing his airway.  
  
He snapped open his eyes as he attempted to tug himself free. He had the tube halfway out before realizing that it had actually been put there to help him. He was all by himself in the med lab. Coughing, he pulled the tube until it cleared his throat, then he gasped several times before getting his breathing to return to normal.  
  
What was going on? He knew he'd heard Shalimar call for help. He couldn't have dreamed that. And what possible reason did Adam have for intubating him? He'd been recovering perfectly fine. But now he was hooked up to an IV and just about the all monitoring devices that Adam owned.  
  
Taking a deep breath, Jesse phased himself and ghosted out, falling through the table he'd been lying on. Once done, he rolled to the side and then stood up, now clear of the sheets and more medical equipment than should ever have been required for a single person with a none too serious wound.  
  
-----  
  
Shalimar was still bent over Adam when the alarm in the lab went off, signaling a code blue. The only thing that would cause that would be if Jesse's heart had just stopped. She jerked her head up and stared in that direction, shocked when Jesse appeared a moment later, bracing himself against the lab doorframe.  
  
"Shal, what's wro--" He preempted his own sentence as he spotted Adam. "What happened?!"  
  
She shook her head nervously, panicked. "I don't know, he just..." She returned her focus to Adam. He was completely unresponsive to everything.  
  
"Maybe we should get him to the lab," Jesse suggested, his voice scratchy and hoarse, joining her at his side. "Adam, can you hear me?"  
  
Adam finally seemed to return to himself and acknowledged them. "Yes, I hear you." The mental touch was gone, but he could still feel the tremors of intense pain, the very air around him still thick with fear.  
  
Shalimar let out the breath she'd been holding, reminding herself to continue breathing. But Adam still appeared stunned. "You scared the crap out of me. What was that?" she eventually asked.  
  
Adam's reply was just one word, the only explanation for such a strong mental backlash: "Emma."  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
I'm looking for another beta-reader for this story. E-mail if interested. 


	33. Tears

First off, HUGE thanks to my lovely beta-readers. How you guys put up with me, I'll never know.  
  
And everyone give a hand to my newest victim-- err, *volunteer*... I meant to say volunteer, Lanfear, whose talents are being wasted on my little fic since I don't have the time to incorporate all her awesome suggestions into something that's being posted as a WIP, but she's beta-reading it for me anyway. Send some feedback her way, she deserves it.  
  
-----  
  
-----  
  
As Adam's head cleared, he became fully aware that Jesse was with him. "You shouldn't be up." He stood and wrapped his arm around the young man. "Let's get you back to the lab."  
  
"Right now, I'm more worried about you," Jesse said, although he was the one who looked ready to collapse.  
  
Shalimar studied them both carefully. So that was what had happened to Jesse? A psionic attack? "Why would Emma hurt you guys?"  
  
"I don't think she was trying to," Jesse explained as they made it back to the lab and he sat weakly. "I don't remember much, but whatever was inside my head, it was completely distraught. I think it was a call for help."  
  
"A call that was powerful enough to kill you if Adam hadn't intervened," Shalimar snapped. "Since when is Emma strong enough to do that?"  
  
Jesse stared down at his hands. He could still recall the texture of the cement, the pain, and the taste of blood in his mouth. What she'd done hadn't been intentional, it was just that... "She's hurt. Badly. She's desperate."  
  
Adam switched off the alarm that was still demanding attention due to Jesse unhooking himself from the monitors, then he carefully checked him over as he thought about that. Jesse showed no signs of having almost died less than a couple hours earlier. When he was convinced that the bullet wound would heal without any further incidents, he resumed their conversation.  
  
"It was more than a call for help," he told them. It was an invitation. Emma had placed something inside his mind. "I think she gave me a road map."  
  
-----  
  
After selecting his food, Jordan found a seat at one of the cafeteria tables. He didn't know why he hadn't gone home to eat. He needed to take a break from the GSA and re-evaluate things. He hadn't even tried to stop them from breaking Mulwray's legs. In hindsight, he wondered if he could live with that.  
  
Was this really the life he wanted?  
  
Poking at his food but not eating it, he looked up as several newly recruited security guards entered on their break. Thankfully, they didn't so much as acknowledge him or sit at the same table. They were too busy talking amongst themselves.  
  
Jordan continued to shift the food around on his plate while he listened to them chatter about how the recent escape attempt was going to ruin any chances they had at early promotion. Jordan tried to ignore them, but pieces of the conversation still made their way to him.  
  
"So how's Hannigan doing? Mr. Eckhart is gonna have his ass for getting shot with his own gun."  
  
"It's not entirely his fault. They were in GSA uniform."  
  
"Like that matters to Mr. Eckhart?"  
  
"Who were the poor saps left in their underwear? They're definitely fired."  
  
Sighing, Jordan decided he wasn't hungry after all and dumped his plate in the trash. Then something about the overheard conversation hit him. He quickly turned to the newbies. "Excuse me, were you referring to Mulwray and DeLauro?"  
  
One of them glanced up at him. "You aware of anybody else who tried to fly to coup?" he asked sarcastically.  
  
Jordan frowned. "But you said they stole uniforms?"  
  
The guy seemed annoyed. "That's what Hannigan's putting in his report."  
  
"Oh fuck!" Jordan was instantly sprinting for the door.  
  
-----  
  
Consciousness returned, and Brennan slowly opened his eyes. He could make out the blurry elements of the room around him, but not clearly enough to actually place his surroundings. He closed his eyes and wished for home.  
  
It was all a bad dream, and when he woke, he would be in his cozy, warm bed in his own room... safe inside Sanctuary. Adam would already be at work figuring out how the save the world from its next crisis while Shalimar was hitting the dojo mats for an early workout and Jesse drowned himself in a pot of coffee. In the kitchen, Emma would be making them all a huge breakfast with more food than five people should possibly be able to eat.  
  
Or maybe not. No, Emma would still be asleep, curled up in bed... Curled up beside him in his bed, still slumbering peacefully where she'd drifted to sleep wrapped in his arms after they'd talked the entire night through.  
  
If he rolled over, he'd smell the scent of her shampoo as her hair tickled his nose. If he rolled to the other side, he could slap his alarm before it had the chance to go off and wake her. They could snuggle up and refuse to rise until the sun was high in the afternoon sky.  
  
It would be a perfect day. Absolutely perfect...  
  
Except that he knew he was lying on a cold, hard table in some god-forsaken lab. And he was alone. Well, everybody has to return to reality at some point. He supposed he ought to figure out just how bad today would truly be.  
  
Okay, deep breath... Now slide the eyes open again, fully wake, and prepare for the pain. First priority, assess his condition. Everything hurt, so he took several more very deep breaths and tried to focus. There was a fuzzy, somewhat nauseous feeling that was a telltale sign of morphine, and he silently thanked Jordan. Then he cursed him.  
  
However, the pain was at least being numbed enough to allow him to think. But then, he figured he was also in shock and that numbed far better than any painkiller.  
  
Not ready face his main fear yet, he remained lying still. He'd start high and work down. The headache was fairly bad but tolerable. His vision was still nowhere close to perfect, but it was definitely improving. Given more time, he'd hopefully have his sight back fully. Next, he moved his jaw. Sore, not broken, and a quick check told him no teeth had been knocked loose.  
  
His entire chest hurt. It wasn't completely pleasant to breathe, but he could fill his lungs with air and there were no sharp spikes of pain to signal broken ribs. He was lucky so far. Now he just needed to stop procrastinating.  
  
Ever so carefully, he attempted moving his legs. Agony like nothing he'd ever experienced before erupted and turned his vision into sparks. His perception of the pain must have been tripled from his fear. It hadn't been a nightmare. His legs really were broken. Broken and not healed.  
  
Crying, he reflexively tugged at his restraints. That action brought a scream as fire shot through his wrists. He held himself absolutely still. After a moment, he opened his eyes and began trying to figure out what the hell had caused that.  
  
Eckhart was obviously taking no chances of him escaping again. There were heavy straps across his shoulders, arms, waist, and thighs. He was almost completely immobile. Shifting his head, he squinted and got a look at his hands. His palms were turned upward and thin metal bars had been inserted through his binds which pressed against the base of his wrists.  
  
He moved one of his hands a fraction of a centimeter and then had to choke back the bile that rose in his throat. Squeezing his eyes shut, he wished himself anywhere but here. Eckhart had found a way to make it literally impossible for him to pull his hands free.  
  
The small poles weren't merely pressing against his skin - they actually went all the way through his wrists and locked on the other side. He'd effectively been nailed down.  
  
This was not happening. There was no way this was real. NO! This could not be happening!  
  
"Emma..." he said faintly, hoping they were both alone. He then waited quietly, needing to feel her inside his head.  
  
*Brennan?* came the instant reply. It was accompanied by an enormous wave of emotion. He could tell she was frightened. She'd been going crazy waiting for him to wake. In fact, it was likely her presence in his mind that had brought him out of his healing slumber while his body was still so badly damaged.  
  
Concentrating hard, he attempted to let her see his thoughts. He hadn't healed, and his legs were broken. Both of his legs. He had never been so scared.  
  
Calmness swept over him along with reassurances that everything would be okay, but he didn't accept the artificial feelings. Those bastards had broken his legs, and he wasn't invincible; he didn't heal this time.  
  
If she was let out of the room again, he wanted her to run. Save herself. Use her power and get out.  
  
Images were then sent back to his mind, letting him know she wouldn't leave without him. Never.  
  
"Damn you," he whispered, knowing she was picking up on his anger if not his words. He couldn't escape with her. He couldn't run... couldn't even walk. They'd never let him go, but she had a chance as long as nobody knew she was able to access her gift.  
  
A jumble of feelings rushed through his mind and he tried to make sense of them. She still refused to go without him. They'd kill him.  
  
*I'm already dead,* he tried to send back and could feel her heart breaking for him. This wasn't fixable. He quickly reinforced the need for her to escape. And he wanted her to do whatever was necessary to accomplish that.  
  
Then he stopped arguing with her. *They're back,* he spoke silently before closing off the flow of communication between himself and Emma.  
  
Eckhart entered with somebody else. Somebody who wasn't Jordan. Brennan wondered if he even cared anymore.  
  
The burning drops were applied to his eyes once more, washing over his irises and stealing his partial view of the bleak world he now existed in. He didn't really mind that either. He hadn't had enough hope to be disappointed.  
  
Then more tests were done, and x-rays were taken of his legs. He listened with disinterest to what he already knew. His left leg showed no signs of improvement. It had somehow broken cleanly and only needed to be set to aid the strand in doing its job. Naturally, Eckhart refused to allow it, stating that they'd give it more time before intervening.  
  
The condition of his right leg was enough to startle him. His kneecap had been shattered. And it was indeed healing. It was healing wrong. If allowed to continue as it was, he might never regain the use of his leg.  
  
Eckhart ordered nothing be done. He wanted to see if his precious strand could fix it despite the odds. He didn't care if Brennan never walked again due to his choice. Brennan told himself that he didn't care either. All hope was already gone.  
  
Finally, he found his voice and made a request. "Whatever tests are left, do them all now, all at once," he pleaded in a last desperation. "Do them, and then use whatever means you have available for ending my life. Permanently finish it. Just don't make Emma watch. Don't ever let her see. Please."  
  
Eckhart laughed at him before saying no. Then he rambled on about having a schedule to adhere to and blah blah blah... The next dose would make the changes to his DNA permanent and yada yada... Brennan simply tried to tune him out.  
  
If he didn't hear the words, there'd be nothing to fear. He'd sunken to the point of begging for his death, and Eckhart had felt no sympathy, no trace of compassion. Nothing Brennan could do or say would matter. He was helpless to control any of this, could change nothing, and regardless of understanding it or fearing it, the outcome was already written.  
  
So he wouldn't listen. He wouldn't hear the words that told him this was soon to be permanent. One more injection, and then whatever he was becoming he would be, and he'd be forever. The point of no return was now.  
  
Escape was impossible - he was blind and his legs were useless. Any attempted rescue mission would come too late, if one ever happened at all. Maybe there was hope for Emma, but not for him. He'd pray for her life, but his was forfeit. He could allow himself to give up now, force back the lingering need to fight. It would be easier to accept his fate once he admitted that he was defeated.  
  
So just wish the world away and don't listen.  
  
For a little while, he managed to succeed in the task of not really paying attention... until Eckhart said something about seeing if he could regenerate a limb.  
  
Brennan suddenly screamed at him, at the other doctor, at the wall... at whatever was lurking in the haze that his blind eyes couldn't penetrate. Eckhart wanted to literally dissect him. He couldn't do that. No, just no, please don't... It was barbaric. He told himself he was above it, but if he could have gotten down on his knees to beg, he would have done it, yet that option had become obsolete long ago.  
  
In the end, what use was it to plead with the people who'd just taken away the use of his legs, possibly permanently. He was merely a lab rat, no longer a person. He wished he would die right now from the terrible things that were done to him.  
  
He didn't even know if he was forming real sentences or just screaming. There would be no talking his way out of this. He had nothing to offer. Of course he could so easily betray Mutant X, say they'd abandoned him, and swear his loyalty to Eckhart. Yet only a fool would trust a betrayer not to betray him. Betrayal and allegiance never came hand in hand.  
  
And then he'd have truly shamed himself, for from the very start of this all, Eckhart had known that he would never let Brennan go, as Brennan knew it now. His last act would not be to betray his team. So silence reigned.  
  
Then Eckhart's voice penetrated his thoughts once more. If he behaved, they promised to take something small first... like a finger. That was supposedly being considerate to him since there was no evidence to back up a theory of him actually being able to grow it back.  
  
As the two men left the room, Brennan finally lost control completely. HELL NO! Absolutely not! He jerked his wrists, twisting until blood was dripping from the table into slowly forming pools on the lab floor. He was like an animal willing to gnaw off its own paw to escape from a trap. He would dislocate every bone in his body if it meant a shot at freedom. He'd drag himself out of this place. To hell with the pain.  
  
And to hell with Eckhart, and Jordan, and the entire lot of them. He'd been a fighter all his life, never giving up no matter the odds. So he would fight now, not for his freedom or his life, but solely against them. He wished them all dead. He should have killed Jordan, the other doctor, and his handler and Emma's when he'd had the chance. It had been foolish of him to spare them. Never again, he swore to himself. He no longer cared about the consequences, about how it would change him. At this point, he figured he was too far gone for it to matter.  
  
If they forced him to stay alive for any more tests, he *would* start killing them. One by one if he had to. He'd take out all of them until he worked his way to Eckhart and could tear out the heart of the beast. And God help anyone who would try to stand in his way.  
  
This had gone way too far! No more. He would die, he knew that with a bitter certainty, but so would they. He'd take as many of them down with him as he could.  
  
He suddenly felt Emma with him in his mind again, begging him to stop. He was thrashing blindly, only harming himself. If it were possible, he'd commit suicide to escape. He knew Emma was well aware of that. She was trying to force him to sleep, using her gift savagely against him.  
  
Feelings, emotions, and images spun inside his head, trying to become words. She couldn't talk through their link, because it didn't exactly work like that, but she was desperately attempting to make him understand. Some things, the very strong thoughts, translated into fragmented sentences because they could mean nothing else and were crystal clear, but mostly it was just the feelings behind what was spoken.  
  
She wanted to help him regain control, still believed she could save him. She thought he couldn't actually be suicidal, there was too much turmoil in his mind. It was depression and emptiness that lead to wanting to take one's life, not madness. In his mind, the despair was wrapped in chaos. But she didn't understand that he needed the hollowness. He wanted to feel empty, to find oblivion.  
  
Then he felt how much she cared about him, maybe even loved him - something a lot more powerful than friendship although it wasn't strictly definable. But nobody in his life that he'd loved had ever loved him back.  
  
He instantly lashed out to fight her. She couldn't invade his mind like this! She had no right to keep him from attempting to kill himself! Or kill them. Yet she was urgently trying to bind him with a fierce abandon, insisting that he trust her. Their connection had never been this strong before, and he wasn't able to break it.  
  
So he screamed. Anything to drown her out. Combat the pain. However, pain could be his ally. He suddenly returned all his concentration to his own body, then he focused every spark of strength left inside him, channeling the power into his hands. Then he attempted to release the surge.  
  
Agony seared in his head behind his eyes and then ripped through his body as the sub-dermal governor fought his every impulse to use his gift. He bit his lip and tasted the coppery flow of his blood, then he screamed again, arching as he increased his will to generate an electrical current. The pain swiftly mounted and brought stinging tears to his eyes. He was determined to ride that pain until it completely claimed him.  
  
He would not lie awake while Eckhart destroyed his body with more experiments. Not while he had the governor to do his bidding. There were monitors in the room with him, recording his vital signs, and he was subconsciously aware of the beeps that signified his heart rate growing faster. He forced himself to stay conscious, just a little while longer, until he succeeded and drove himself to cardiac arrest.  
  
The rhythm of the beeps escalated rapidly with the pain, and he vaguely felt Emma's surging panic. She wanted him to stop, desperately pleaded for him to please not do this. Yet he couldn't do as she asked. Stopping wasn't an option. If Eckhart could kill him repeatedly, why wasn't he allowed to do the same? He could die, and when he revived, he was capable of drawing himself right back to death. He could sleep through everything.  
  
The frantic heart rate finally began to drop back down, falling off dangerously as Brennan's heaving gasps for air ceased. He could no longer breathe, so he let everything go and willed himself to fall.  
  
Emma snatched him up as he fell, embraced him with her mind and convinced him he was normal and had no abilities for the governor to fight. Then she insisted that his lungs draw a breath before he had the chance to crash. So he breathed as she commanded him, and his heartbeat steadied, and he was too weak to resist her. She surrounded his distraught mind and he eventually collapsed back fully against the cold steel table... against her tender mental whispers. She was trying to balance his emotions, but he knew she wasn't strong enough for that.  
  
He hated and then loved her. Needed her as he shoved her away. Fought for life while trying to embrace death. He told himself he wasn't falling apart, and yet something was obviously wrong with him.  
  
He was lost. He couldn't find himself, could hardly sense her, couldn't feel anything anymore... He didn't understand what this meant, if his sanity had slipped away... He prayed it hadn't and hoped the ability to question if it had was reassurance that he wasn't actually mad. And yet he could barely comprehend that Emma had just saved him from taking his own life. Even if only temporarily.  
  
Should he consider this an attempt at suicide? Did it even matter now that he was practically immortal? What was one more death? But he knew. As did she.  
  
It would have been a death by his own hand. He'd actually tried to kill himself. He silently swore to Emma that he was sorry. So very sorry...  
  
What he'd tried to do wouldn't have ended his life and he knew that. He would have woken up again, and being aware of that only multiplied the chaos. There was no escape and he was so desperate for one. In his mind, his action was more like yelling stop or sedating himself than committing suicide, yet at the same time that's exactly what it had been.  
  
*Oh god, Emma, I need you.* He wanted her with him now. He needed her to hold him, needed a shoulder to cry on, needed to be told everything would be okay... he needed her to lie to him. Because he couldn't survive this. He wasn't surviving it.  
  
*We'll be alright,* she whispered back to his mind, the assurance obvious. In his thoughts, she rocked him gently and hushed him, soothed him despite her own worries. She was locked up in solitary confinement and couldn't even touch him, couldn't hope that she'd ever be permitted to. Eckhart would never again allow them to be together. Yet she kept up a stream of mental comforts regardless. *Adam's coming now, and it'll be okay. You don't need to cry. Everything will be fine, you'll see... you'll see...*  
  
It played like an endless mantra inside of him. Never give up. They'd be okay. Tomorrow would bring new hopes and dreams. She kept him surrounded in warm, peaceful thoughts. He could have sworn one of the feelings she put into his mind translated along the lines of, "It will all come out in the wash," and he was tempted to smile, to laugh.  
  
His beautiful Emma. She really had no idea what to say, but she said it anyway, and that made all the difference. In some other world, he could fall in love with this girl. Maybe in another life, he had.  
  
His body was wracked with sobs before he let himself go limp. He couldn't even fight. Not this way. Not any way. Brennan whimpered as tears completely streaked his face. This was too much. He'd been pushed over the edge. Not even Emma's reassurances that they'd be rescued eased his troubled thoughts. If the rest of Mutant X arrived right now, they'd already be too late.  
  
Brennan eventually lay absolutely still. There was only one thing he understood for certain. Eckhart had managed to break him.  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
And I apologize for the delays between parts. I've been busy with rewrites of the script I'm directing for one of my classes. 


	34. Missions

First off, I'd like to apologize for the hideously long delay between chapters. I'm just returning from being banned by the ff.net powers that be. Seems somebody told them I broke a rule. Sadly, they wouldn't reply to my e-mail when I asked what that rule was, so I'm bound to unintentionally break it again (at which point I'll be forbidden to post ever again). So, whoever reported me, can you please tell me what I did wrong? I promise not to get mad, I just want to know so that I can make sure not to do it again.  
  
Oh, and during my forced break from fanfic writing, I finished my finals! Whoohoo! And now back to the story.  
  
-----  
  
-----  
  
The map was rolled out across the table, and the three all stared at it as if in expectation. Jesse rested his elbows on his corner of the paper, needing the table to support him since he was feeling more than a bit weak, but he disguised the action as being merely to keep the large sheet from curling back up.  
  
Adam gave him a glance as he continued to spread out the map, but he didn't comment. He'd grown frustrated of viewing entire cities on the monitors and had switched to hard copy. He was also stalling.  
  
Shalimar's eyes roamed over the massive amount of land displayed on the map, then she let them continue to travel across to Adam. "Well?" she asked with a huff, blowing the stray hair from her face.  
  
Rubbing his face with one hand, Adam just kept looking at the page. He'd expected the lines and labels to become a path, yet he saw nothing. "Give me a minute."  
  
"Oh, you've got to be kidding me!" Shalimar studied the man for a minute and then threw her hands up in defeat. He didn't know.  
  
"Shal, just calm down," Jesse offered, tempted to grab a chair while waiting this out but rejecting the notion since the others would view it as a sign that they needed to mollycoddle him further. "We'll figure it out."  
  
She started pacing agitatedly. "How can you not know? If Emma had told me where to find her, I'd have damn well been paying attention!"  
  
Adam watched her as her eyes briefly flashed feral. He knew she was upset and frustrated, perhaps even a bit jealous. Shalimar was supposedly Emma's best friend other than Brennan, yet she'd reached out to Jesse first and then Adam himself. If in her place, he'd be feeling angry and restless as well.  
  
As the tension in the room grew to the point where he could almost physically touch it, Jesse pushed himself up from his spot against the table. "I'm going to go fire up the Helix," he told the other two.  
  
"And go where?" Shalimar asked. The question was mirrored in Adam's expression. They had no destination.  
  
Jesse merely shook his head. He was done with all these delays. They were going to go rescue their friends, right now. "Wherever we need to be," he stated.  
  
When Shalimar and Adam made no move other than to resume pacing and staring at the map, Jesse shoved the paper off the table and onto the floor. "That isn't going to help us. It's not real, only scribbles. It doesn't work that way!" he practically yelled now that he had their full attention.  
  
Adam moved to place a hand on his shoulder and steady him, but Jesse pulled back. Shalimar just looked worried.  
  
So maybe he was looking a bit faint to be attempting motivational speaking, but Jesse was determined to try. "Emma has never given us information like this. It's not about text and street names. It's feelings and images," he said, trying to find a way of explaining it in words. But it wasn't about words. "Alright look, I don't have it, not all of it, but Adam, you do. You're just not going about it right."  
  
"And throwing our map in the floor is the right way?" Adam asked, trying not to be condescending toward Jesse. He was doing his best, regardless of whether Jesse and Shalimar could see that.  
  
"No. Yes." Jesse ran his hand through his hair. "We just need to go. Look for the location, Adam, not how to get there. Find what Emma told you, and hone in on it. Close your eyes and just feel it if you have to."  
  
"Then let's go then," Shalimar suggested, gesturing for Adam and Jesse to start walking. "It's worth a shot."  
  
Nodding, Jesse began a brisk pace toward the hangar bay. Adam quickly fell into step beside him. "Jesse, a word?"  
  
With reluctance, Jesse stopped. He knew what this was going to be about. "We'll catch up in a minute, Shal," he called to her before turning to Adam and preparing to hold his ground.  
  
"I want you to stay and monitor things from here." That said, Adam waited for the inevitable rebuttal.  
  
"You know I won't." Then a slight pause before, "You need me on this one."  
  
"You're injured." The tone was firm.  
  
"I'm fine," Jesse replied and then clenched his jaw.  
  
Awkward silence formed as neither relented even an inch. Eventually, Jesse spoke once more. "So maybe I'm not fine. Maybe if Emma tries to contact me again, I'll stop breathing just like the last time. And neither you nor Shal will be here with me."  
  
Adam's frown deepened before finally breaking into a grin. That hit was definitely below the belt, but the tactic worked. "You negotiate dirty."  
  
Jesse was tempted to smirk. "Learned from the best," he quipped over his shoulder as he walked by, once more an active player in the mission.  
  
-----  
  
"This is it," Adam said, pulling up all the information available on the building that the Double Helix was currently hovering over. Jesse had been right and Adam had somehow known exactly where they needed to go. He'd simply felt his way, unexplainably able to reverse the path Emma left in his head when she found him. It was like for the moment of time they'd been in contact through her psionic link, she'd switched on a beacon. It was gone now, but he'd only needed it for that single moment to guide his direction.  
  
Jesse leaned closer, viewing the screen. "You're sure? This place wasn't on either of our lists."  
  
Shalimar smiled, readying herself for battle. "It's perfect, slipped completely under our radar. If Eckhart wanted to hide something from us, this certainly accomplished the job."  
  
Adam nodded an affirmative. "Alright, we move in." He glanced at his partial team. "Shalimar and I will gain access through the stairwell to the roof. Jesse, you have the advantage of not needing doors, so you might as well slip in, scope out the place, and then see about unlocking our entrance if you can snag a keycard."  
  
Shalimar looked a tad disappointed that she wouldn't be kicking the door in. "If you're in there more than ten minutes, we're coming in after you."  
  
"Stealth is the only thing playing in our favor," Adam reminded them. "We have the element of surprise. Let's try not to lose that if we want to stand a chance at getting our people out."  
  
Our people? Shalimar mused over his choice of words. Why hadn't he said Brennan and Emma? Was he already distancing himself, preparing for the worst? Adam obviously still thought they weren't likely to get them both back alive, although he'd never told Jesse that. But she wasn't about to voice the thought either.  
  
No, they were here to save their friends. Not to retrieve their bodies.  
  
"Keep your com-lines open at all times," Adam continued.  
  
Jesse held up his hand. "But I don't--"  
  
Adam was fishing in his pocket and pulling out a ring before Jesse had a chance to finish his sentence. "It's the new prototype, not field tested yet, but it should work."  
  
Taking it, Jesse slipped it on and watched it activate once in contact with his skin as it read his DNA. He was somewhat surprised Adam had it with him. He'd been expecting to lose the argument about Jesse coming along. "Did you finish working on the ones for Bren and Emma also?"  
  
Adam didn't reply, merely returning his attention to their plans for once they were inside the complex. Thankfully, Jesse let the subject drop.  
  
-----  
  
Before Brennan even knew somebody was in the room with him again, he was backhanded roughly across his face by a gloved hand. "You do like causing me trouble, don't you, Mr. Mulwray?"  
  
Eckhart. Brennan groaned but didn't respond. What use was telling him to go to hell? He was already there. This was hell, and Brennan just didn't realize that he was dead yet. Sure, that made as much sense as anything else.  
  
"Any further attempts to harm yourself will not be tolerated."  
  
Letting out a huff of air in annoyance, Brennan turned his head the other way. He wanted to merely ignore the man, not thinking him bright enough to realize or even so much as suspect that it had been Emma who saved him... that she wouldn't allow him to come to harm either.  
  
He could feel the tingle of her inside his head still, not trying to talk to him, merely there. There where she didn't belong, busy pushing ever deeper, reaching further in an attempt at holding his mind together. It was taking all her strength.  
  
Outside his head, Eckhart still droned on. "If you try that little stunt again, your governor will be deactivated, you'll be moved somewhere very wet, and the restraints will remain permanently."  
  
Brennan almost laughed at that threat, finally speaking. "Do you think it would be any harder for me to kill myself if you decide to strap me in a tank of water?" He smiled bitterly. That would only make the task infinitely easier. "You're delusional."  
  
Leather gloved fingers gripped his chin, and Brennan knew Eckhart was staring at him despite his not being able to glare back. "When you fought, I blinded your eyes. You ran, and I broke your legs. Now, what makes you think I won't slice off both your hands?" he warned, his voice dark and disturbingly menacing, presuming the elemental could only channel his power one way.  
  
Brennan wanted to fight back, spit at him, curse him... Yet he did nothing. He'd waste no further effort on talking or resisting. Ignoring the man was more satisfying.  
  
This was hell, and he was already dead, Brennan repeated to himself once more. Because maybe if he told himself that enough times, he'd believe it. And then he could stop worrying about his life.  
  
-----  
  
"There," Jordan said, tapping the glass screen of one of the many small monitors. "Zoom in on that."  
  
He waited impatiently as the security guard adjusted the stairwell camera. The view tightened slowly in on the wall, and Jordan bent in closer and squinted, not wanting to believe his own eyes. "Any chance you can get this in color?" he requested.  
  
"'Fraid not," the man replied.  
  
Jordan briefly glanced at him, but it really made no difference. Even in black and white, he knew he was looking at red. "Take us out of real time and cue the tape back to the time Mulwray and DeLauro were apprehended."  
  
The guard did as ordered, not really seeing the point but humoring Jordan out of boredom. When he called up the proper time code, the picture was still identical to before.  
  
"Take us back in five-minute intervals," Jordan instructed, his gaze glued to the screen. The taped feed began jumping back, the picture never changing until suddenly the streak disappeared. "Stop! Play it forward, normal speed."  
  
After a few seconds, the picture clearly showed both Mulwray and DeLauro enter the stairwell. As they passed through the camera's view, Brennan touched the wall, leaving a smear of blood against the white.  
  
Upon seeing the footage, the security guard choked on his sip of coffee. He turned to Jordan. "Well I'll be damned."  
  
Jordan briskly nodded. "If you were on duty during the time on this tape, I'd suggest you hand in your resignation and pray Mr. Eckhart is in a forgiving mood."  
  
As the flustered man began to choke out excuses and swear that nobody had been through that stairwell, Jordan turned and left, closing the door and cutting him off mid-stutter. Unfortunately, this verified his suspicions.  
  
DeLauro's governor was deactivated.  
  
If she had a way of accessing her gift whenever she wished, Jordan's own future with Genomex would be very sort-lived. He'd advised Eckhart to keep her around, that she posed no risk. She was his fucking responsibility. So it was his ass on the line.  
  
How had he even gotten himself into this mess? He was an employee for a government agency with great career potential, and he was throwing it all away. He should have followed the rules and never talked to Mulwray. He was a con man after all, and sympathy for the devil could only get you burned.  
  
Had he really been naïve enough to fall for the first pretty face assigned to him? Forging a friendship with Brennan had been so damn alluring. He was dangerous and forbidden, and so unbelievably tragic. Damn Mutant X. They really did spin a good line and get under your skin. No wonder they topped Eckhart's list.  
  
Arriving at the weapons locker, Jordan pressed his hand against the panel to verify his ID and gain access to a gun. He'd need to take care of things. He hesitated, but wondered how there was even an option to ponder. The GSA was government, the good guys. While Mutant X were outlaw vigilantes - terrorists even.  
  
The situation with Emma was a problem he'd allowed himself to fall into, and now he was going to fix it once and for all.  
  
Eckhart would certainly not allow this outrage to go unpunished. It was the final straw. That meant he had only two options, and either one meant somebody would pay the price and die. He checked to be positive that the gun was loaded, then he clicked off the safety.  
  
He would need to either kill Emma, or risk his own life by setting her free.  
  
-----  
  
No sooner had he returned to normal density than an alarm began to blare. Jesse glanced up and saw the security camera directly overhead. He cringed. So much for picking a safe location to phase in.  
  
Seeing as his cover was already blown, he didn't bother with stealth and just ran toward the exit where Adam and Shalimar would be waiting for him. They still had to attempt this. Coming back later wasn't an option now that Eckhart knew they were aware of this location.  
  
Before he could make his way to the door however, he was confronted by an armed security guard. Turning to flee in the opposite direction, his path of retreat was cut off as well by yet another agent. Both men drew their guns.  
  
-----  
  
TBC... 


	35. Wars

For those who asked, no I wasn't banned again. I was just enjoying spending some time on the other things that I'm writing. I did finally get a reply from somebody at ff.net, which was all I really wanted, and I removed my little PMS-fic, in which I ranted about the situation, of my own free will.  
  
On a sad note, my next door neighbor and close friend of the family recently passed away. He was like a grandpa to me, so I'm still quite a bit sad. The funeral was Saturday. Our old pastor came back to speak at the service, and he said something that really stuck with me. Celebrate because he knew the Lord and it was his time to go home, but also sorrow because we're human and will miss him.  
  
Anyway, thanks for bearing with me. Now back to the story.  
  
-----  
  
-----  
  
"Remember that comment you made about the element of surprise?" Jesse remarked as he opened the door for Shalimar and Adam. The alarm was clearly blaring. "Exactly how important was that to the plan?"  
  
Shalimar could swear she saw Adam grimace, but they both moved in, never suggesting turning back. This was their one shot, and they couldn't allow Eckhart to pack up and go underground again in a new location.  
  
Then she grimaced as well when she noticed the body lying on the floor at their feet. There was a trail of blood along the corridor, making it obvious he'd been dragged. The reason was clear when she saw that the lock on the door required a handprint.  
  
Adam automatically bent to check for a pulse, but Jesse stopped him. "They're both dead."  
  
"Both?" Adam asked, quickly rising. Jesse turned away before nodding.  
  
Shalimar didn't delay and kept moving, following the smear of crimson that ran along the floor. When she rounded the corner, the trail stopped, but another GS agent lay further down the hall - on his back, with a fatal gunshot wound to his chest. She looked to Jesse for an explanation, the question already forming on her lips.  
  
Before she could speak, he mumbled a short, "I didn't have a choice."  
  
She stared at him, long and hard. His expression was pained, and his tone had been almost... guilty?  
  
The fallen agent still had his gun, and there was another one resting near the start of the bloodstain. Judging by the locations where both guards had gone down and the fact that Jesse was still unarmed, Adam managed to deduce what hadn't been said. Jesse had been caught between them, and he'd chosen to ghost instead of mass.  
  
"You did the right thing," Adam told him. Without backup, he'd have been left defenseless if he'd massed instead and then needed to return to normal density when he could no longer hold his breath. Although it must have been a hard call for him to make.  
  
"Yeah, I know," Jesse replied, not sounding certain in the least.  
  
Adam placed a hand on his arm in a gesture meant to console him, but the young man merely pulled away. He didn't want any sympathy.  
  
"Jess..." Shalimar tried, seeing his response to Adam and halting her step forward. She wasn't sure if she should attempt approaching him also or give him space.  
  
He glanced briefly over at her. "Just don't, okay?"  
  
They fell into silence, and Adam got them moving again by picking up one of the guns and slipping it into his belt. Jesse hesitated a moment but then retrieved the other shoved it in his own waistband.  
  
"Come on," Shalimar offered encouragingly. On the bright side, at least they knew this was indeed the right building. "Let's go find a computer for you to hack and see about shutting down these cameras."  
  
Jesse gave her a halfhearted smile. "Sure."  
  
-----  
  
Brennan had almost fallen asleep when his head was shoved to the side and a needle was stabbed into the back of his neck. This time the action was fast, not careful as before. He suddenly recoiled from the shock before falling still again.  
  
It was as though a wave of ice seeped through his entire body, mixing with the heat as it tried to remove it. The pain was unimaginable, yet Brennan still didn't move. He wouldn't fight anymore. He couldn't. Let Eckhart do what he might, it no longer mattered. What difference did it make if they were allowed to finish dissecting him? It was only more tests. He was already broken, his struggle gone, fully exposed to his tormentors. So the type of violation to come next was pointless.  
  
Let them cut him if that's what they wished. He wouldn't give in to the fear and think of it as anything new. It would be no more vulgar or brutal than the rapes of spirit he'd already been subjected to. And he had endured those, so he could survive further assaults as well. Besides, he had no choice in the matter considering he was already dead.  
  
Although on some level, he knew that fantasy not to be true. He'd merely touched death, but was never permitted to stay there. So there was still the hope that in death there would be peace... if only they would allow him to die. He knew he'd already died multiple times, and been brought back damaged somehow. Life now seemed so worthless.  
  
When he'd died, there had been no tunnel, no bright light or deceased relatives to welcome him. He didn't remember anything at all, just that there'd been pain when he'd come back. So if he was lucky, then perhaps there was no afterlife, and no God who, if real, had surely deserted him in life. If he got his way, he would simply cease to exist. He found that thought comforting.  
  
But in the here and now, he still clung to life. Not by his own accord, of course - it was simply that his body refused to obey his commands and consent to just give up already. His heart would only stop stubbornly beating when a permission other than his own was given.  
  
So he was stuck with reality and pain. And he felt suddenly sick. His subconscious mind deduced that whatever he'd just been injected with, it was not the final step in his surrender to the Messiah Strand. For that was warm and welcoming, and this, well... wasn't. It was something completely different, another test he was being forced through.  
  
Yet he still tried to emotionally separate himself from the physical agony. Genomex owned his body now; he was the property of science. They had made him, so it was only fitting that they be the ones to destroy him. He'd never had the right to believe he could live his own life. Free will was a foolish dream - it was something created for normal people, but never meant for him. Not him, because he was a freak who belonged in a lab, something to be studied.  
  
His body, his DNA, the very blood in his veins, and the choice of whether he lived or died... that was all theirs now, as it always had been. But he wasn't. He was his own. So he convinced himself of that, and then he locked away whatever was left of his free spirit deep inside his mind, sheltering his soul where there could be no more pain. If he could become completely detached, he wouldn't be required to feel, and once that was done, he would be numb to the outside world, essentially gone except for that small, protected part. The rest of him was irrelevant. They could do whatever they desired to his body now.  
  
Voices still drifted in as Brennan set about his task of shielding them out.  
  
"You do realize you've just killed him, right?" somebody said, the words spoken from a source very near but they seemed to dance around. Brennan refused to let them register. "He'll be unable to fight that until the changes to his DNA have been made permanent."  
  
"I'm well aware of that," Eckhart replied. "Security has been breached. If Adam manages to take him back, this will force his hand."  
  
Adam again. Always everything revolved around Adam. Brennan was tired beyond caring. He resumed building his mental blockade. He'd make it strong enough to keep even Emma out. She didn't really love him. Neither did Adam. They were both pieces of the outside, so he needed to get rid of them as well.  
  
Then the room was silent, and Brennan cracked open his eyes to see if anybody was still there, and also to check if his wall was physically visible, but he instantly closed them. The brightness was overwhelming and made fresh pain stab inside his head.  
  
The outside world was still white. And it still hurt him. But he could make it go away. He *would* make it go away.  
  
-----  
  
"Done!" Jesse declared triumphantly, punching the Enter key and then spinning his chair away from the screen.  
  
"Great," Shalimar said, dragging another unconscious GS agent across the small room they'd ducked into and shoving him in a storage locker. She was pleased to see Jesse back in his element and playing with a computer, but she was running out of places to stash the guards who kept finding them.  
  
After finishing a clothing swap with Shalimar's last unsuspecting victim, Adam turned to Jesse. "It won't take them long to figure out how to fix the cameras. Are there any other diversions you can give us?"  
  
"I could set off a few fire alarms," Jesse offered, "but turning on the sprinklers would likely only piss off Brennan, and we might need his help getting out of here."  
  
"Alright," Adam said, his brow furrowed at the mention of their teammate. "Let's get moving then."  
  
"Where exactly are we moving to?" Shalimar asked. This complex was a bit large to be searching without a plan.  
  
Heading out into the hall, Jesse snatched a map from the wall. "When we were outside, the scanners in the Double Helix were picking up all kinds of heat readings in what should be the south wing of this building," he told her.  
  
She gave him a blank stare that was just a bit too blonde.  
  
"Am I the only one who finds it odd that this place has no south wing?" he added with exasperation. Then he discreetly as possible reached to catch the gun which kept dislodging itself from his waistband and trying to slip down his pant-leg while he walked. He absently wondered why nobody in the movies ever encountered problems like this.  
  
"Sublevel," commented Adam, taking the map from Jesse and leading them towards the elevators.  
  
"Thank you!" Jesse blurted, giving him a "my point exactly" look before shifting the gun to his coat pocket.  
  
"Well, what do we do once we're down there, look for another map with a place labeled 'Prison for Members of Mutant X'?" Shalimar asked sarcastically.  
  
"No," Adam told her. "We split up so that we can cover more ground. But I want you and Jesse to stay together."  
  
Despite feeling like he'd been paired off with Shalimar just so she could keep an eye on him, Jesse didn't protest. They'd work better without arguing, and he was already feeling a bit drained.  
  
-----  
  
With the cameras disabled, they managed to do a fairly good job of avoiding the GS agents in the sublevels. They had the advantage of being invisible in a complex far too large to search easily.  
  
Things seemed to be going better than expected when Shalimar suddenly stopped walking and motioned for Jesse to be quiet. Her feral senses picked up somebody approaching. There were no doors in the hallway for them to slip through, and it wouldn't be a good idea to leave a path of bodies.  
  
Shalimar could easily knock out a single guard if she needed to, but if he didn't report back, others would surely follow. So making a split-second decision, she jumped up and braced herself across the width of the hall, placing her hands firmly on one wall and her feet pressed tight to the opposite.  
  
Seeing this, Jesse just shrugged his shoulders, took a deep breath, and then ghosted into the wall. He waited as long as possible before phasing back through. As luck would have it, the agent had passed them by at this point and didn't notice Jesse appear behind him. He continued on his way, oblivious.  
  
Once he was around the corner, Shalimar no longer felt the need to stick herself to the ceiling, and she dropped down with her usual cat-like grace. Then she cast Jesse a broad grin.  
  
"Can't believe we got away with that," he whispered, also smiling. That jerk had walked directly under Shalimar without noticing. "No wonder we always beat these guys."  
  
Then Jesse took a step and tripped. Looking down, Shalimar noticed that his shoelace was stuck in the wall. "Can't you phase it out?"  
  
Jesse tugged at the lace. "No."  
  
"But you phased it in."  
  
He glared up at her. "It wasn't untied before."  
  
She stooped beside him. She never did quite understand his powers. "How come you can phase your clothes but not other objects?"  
  
With a huff, he replied, "My clothes are right against my body, so it's like phasing my skin." He gave the lace another jerk, thankfully ripping it. He then proceeded to tie a quick knot. At least he wouldn't be mounting a rescue with only one shoe.  
  
"Well, what if I was right against your body?" Shalimar asked as they resumed the search.  
  
Jesse ducked his face so she wouldn't see his grin. "That would be incest, Shal."  
  
She lightly slapped his arm. "You know what I meant."  
  
"It's a surface area thing. Like if I wrap my hand around a pebble, I can phase it, but I can't slap my palm against an entire mountain and make it rock solid. Well actually, a mountain already kinda is, so that doesn't really apply, but what I meant is I can't just go and ghost the entire thing, and..." He gave her an annoyed look when he saw how amused she was with his botched explanation. "Don't we have more important things right now?"  
  
Spotting a room with a computer, she steered him into it. "Yeah, so do your thing."  
  
"What?"  
  
She gave him a look that said, "Who's the blond now?" "Get it to tell you what room they have Brennan and Emma stashed in."  
  
"Oh... right." Jesse quickly sat down and worked his way past the login password. It only made sense that they would keep records on all their guests at this quaint little hotel, and that they would keep those files only on the sublevel network. In no time, he found a massive folder on Brennan.  
  
Opening it, he discovered a list of documents, picture files, and what appeared to be clips of footage from the security cameras. For some reason, they seemed to be keeping very thorough notes on his friend.  
  
While Shalimar played lookout, Jesse started to read the first report, skimming the screen. It seemed they were using Brennan for some experiment, and every detail was being very well documented. He switched to a different report and continued reading for several paragraphs, quickly becoming horrified. More skimming proved that it was page after page of precise clinical descriptions of what could only be defined as torture. Praying all the files weren't alike, he opened a later dated document to discover more of the same.  
  
What kind of demented experiment required testing the subject's - Brennan's - response to pain? Just reading it made him feel sick. He didn't even want to look at the pictures. He wouldn't have kept reading either if he weren't searching for the location where he was being held. He scrolled down the document to the bottom.  
  
His eyes froze on the screen, and it took him a while to fully comprehend what he was reading. When the information sank in, he shoved his chair back and stumbled away from the computer. Making his way to the corner of the room, he braced himself against the wall and tried to breathe. Then he fell to his knees and threw up.  
  
Shalimar was instantly rushing to his side. "Jesse!" His head was bowed and his hand was still pressed against the wall. His entire body was shaking. "Jess, what is it?"  
  
He turned around and just clung to her, crying against her shoulder. She quickly held him and attempted to soothe him. Whatever he'd read had horrified him. "Jess, tell me what's going on," she requested softly.  
  
Jesse fought the urge to get up and run. He needed so desperately to get out of this place. Now. He stared at Shalimar. "Brennan is dead."  
  
"What?" she gasped. They hadn't gotten this far to discover their friend was already dead. No way. That wasn't an option! She shoved herself up and marched over to the computer, glaring at the screen. Jesse had apparently been reading Brennan's file, and at the bottom of the page was the time of death.  
  
Jesse remained sitting, then he reached a trembling hand into his pocket and pulled out the gun. He tossed it away from himself as if it had just burnt him. Then he buried his face in his hands and choked back a sob.  
  
The action caught Shalimar's attention and she turned back to him. After finding out about Brennan, she was ready to start kicking serious ass and blowing some GSA brains out. Yet Jesse had just thrown the gun aside.  
  
"I never killed anybody before," he said slowly. He'd caused two deaths to get his friend out of this place, and he was already dead. Jesse didn't know how he was supposed to feel about that, about the choice he'd made - guilty or glad. Or guilty for being glad. All of it repulsed him.  
  
They didn't have time for this, Shalimar thought agitatedly. Jesse needed to get his head back in the game. "What about Emma?" she demanded, not allowing herself to dwell on the loss of Brennan. They were still here for a reason. "Jesse, answer me!"  
  
Kneeling in front of him, she made him look at her. "Jesse!" He was in a complete state of shock and she softened immediately. He considered Brennan a brother and had learned of his death by reading it off some damned computer screen. She should have told him Adam's suspicions, prepared him for this. She pulled him into a tender embrace. "Jess... I'm sorry."  
  
She hugged him for a long while. "I'm so sorry, Jess. And you didn't kill anybody." She'd pieced together the fact that he'd ghosted as well. It had just taken her a bit longer to figure it out than it had Adam. "You never fired a shot, Jess, they did - and they would have killed you. None of this is your fault. And losing Brennan isn't our fault either. There was nothing we could have done."  
  
"I don't know about Emma," he eventually replied, his tone flat.  
  
Shalimar helped him get up. "We need to find out, okay?" she said gently.  
  
Weakly, Jesse made his way back to the chair and sat down. He closed the window that was displaying the report on Brennan, then he moved to switch to Emma's file but Shalimar placed her hand over his on the mouse.  
  
"Wait." She pointed to another document. It was dated after the one they'd just been reading. "What's that?"  
  
"Shal, don't open it," Jesse pleaded.  
  
She shifted her gaze to him. "Why not? Brennan might still be alive."  
  
Jesse tried to blink back his tears and failed. "It's more likely the autopsy report," he explained, his voice choked. Times of death weren't normally recorded without there being actual deaths. "I can't see that."  
  
Switching to Emma's file, he eventually found a room number. Jesse didn't read beyond that except to check the bottom of the page. He didn't want to know if she'd been tortured as well, but on some level he had to admit to himself that he knew she was hurt. The cry she'd sent to his mind had been full of agony. So he didn't read the words... He only cared that she was still alive.  
  
They'd go get her, and then they'd go home.  
  
-----  
  
She slid through the raging storm of Brennan's mind, seeking to restore the peace. Yet the terrain was foreign to her now, hardly resembling the feel of her best friend.  
  
But Emma surged forward, determinedly sifting in the unbalance of it all. Emotions roared like waves, tossing her in their wakes. Everything beyond the sea was darkness, except that the black wasn't empty, it surged with a presence. She could feel the madness as if it were a physical being, although liquid in its movements. It gnashed at her, translating to her thoughts as a beast.  
  
Then she found the light. The familiar comfort of Brennan took the shape of a mirrored box, and she realized that he was shielding himself in, building walls. Anguish raked across the seams, seeking entrance.  
  
Emma stubbornly fought it. Despair was for those who knew the future with certainty. Those who had no trace of hope.  
  
She tried to toss up a barrier to protect his sanity, but what met the night was merely netting, weak and flawed. It wouldn't hold long. It would crumble and the monster with fangs and claws would easily tear through and penetrate it.  
  
Then she would lose him. He'd fall to either the depression or madness - both of which were waging war to consume his mind - or he would complete the box. If the glass surface were finished, the brightness inside would be gone to her. She'd never find the reflection amidst the endless dark. The mirror would essentially disappear.  
  
He was locking her out.  
  
On some level, she heard them enter the room, but she blocked them out of her focus, needing it to remain elsewhere. She was so exhausted, spent from trying to hold Brennan's mind together, but she refused to let him go. She needed to stay with him, keep using her power to sustain him.  
  
Somebody touched her and she drew back, curling herself tightly up. They had to leave her alone. She couldn't be distracted, not now. Brennan had already become apathetic to the war being waged inside him. She used all her strength to toss up still more shields around his mind. His own were faltering, failing.  
  
Shock had claimed his body, and his thoughts were no longer coherent. If she lost him now, she didn't think she'd ever be able to get him back. She needed to go to him. He needed somebody to be physically near him, someone to pull him back and force him to awareness.  
  
She was touched again and she sent out an image of fire. Anyone who approached her would be met by flames.  
  
-----  
  
TBC... 


	36. Betrayals

This chapter is for Lanfear, simply for being a kindred spirit. No further explanation needed.  
  
~~~~~  
  
As Shalimar moved to give Emma's shoulder a good shake in attempt to snap her out of her trance, Jesse quickly stopped her. "I think we're frightening her."  
  
"We don't have time for this. I say either I toss her over my shoulder or we drag her out of here, but we need to get moving right about now," Shalimar said while staring at her friend who seemed to be a million miles away, completely lost in her own thoughts. "What's wrong with her anyway?"  
  
Resting his hand on her arm, Jesse pulled Shalimar back away from Emma so that they could talk. "I think she's in shock."  
  
"From what?" Shalimar tossed her hair over her shoulder as she turned back to face Emma once more. Other than a couple faint bruises, there wasn't a mark on her.  
  
Jesse looked down at the floor and took a deep breath, shuddering as he breathed out. It all made sense now. "She was there when they killed Brennan," he said slowly. Her governor obviously wasn't active or she couldn't have contacted him and Adam. Which meant she wasn't necessarily the one who was injured, at least not physically. What was to say she hadn't gotten a hit off Brennan as well? "She felt everything."  
  
Shalimar looked about to say something in reply, but then she merely remained silent. She was now concerned about both Emma and Jesse. He seemed a bit pale, and something about the way Jesse had just said that made her feel like he'd witnessed it as well.  
  
However, they still needed to get Emma home. "Let's get her out of here," she suggested, taking a step forward. As she did so, a wall of fire suddenly surged into existence, dividing the room in half.  
  
"It's not real," Jesse offered quickly, trying to calm Shalimar who'd suddenly jumped back away from the flames. However, real or not, he knew it would pose a daunting obstacle for the Feral. They'd need to cross it in order to reach Emma.  
  
Leaving Shalimar's side, Jesse tried to mentally prepare himself. The fire was only in his mind. After taking several breaths to even his breathing, he walked up to the barrier, feeling the heat. "There is no spoon," he mumbled before sucking in another breath and then holding it while ghosting and stepping directly into the fire.  
  
For something that wasn't there, it still burned as though it were real. By the time Jesse was through it, he practically collapsed. Shalimar could only watch, frightened and unable to summon the strength of will required to follow.  
  
Emma pulled her knees to her chest and starting rocking herself while chanting a chorus of, "Go away, leave us alone, go away, go away..."  
  
"Emma..." Jesse tried to soothe her, fighting against the onslaught of pain that reared up inside his mind. Before he knew it, he'd gone down to his knees.  
  
"Leave us alone." Emma's tone was firm. Not recognizing the presence as being Jesse, she threw every horror she could conjure at him, assailing his mind with all her strength.  
  
Shalimar shrieked as Jesse fell completely to the floor on the other side of the flames. "Emma, stop it!" she shouted, wanting to rush to Jesse's side but still not able to compete with her fear of the fire.  
  
Jesse now lay motionless, and Shalimar started to panic. Whatever Emma was doing to him, she was still broadcasting it. "Emma, look at me! We're your friends, we want to help you." She stared beseechingly through the barricade at her distressed friend. "You just hurt Jesse."  
  
Emma couldn't stop herself from crying. "Leave us alone..."  
  
"Us?" Jesse repeated, struggling to keep from blacking out. Was there actually a chance Brennan was still alive? Or was Emma fully immersed in a post-traumatic state?  
  
"Go. Away." With that, the fire dropped, Emma too weak and confused to hold it. Why did her captors care about Bren?  
  
As the flames went down, Shalimar sprinted to her friends' sides. "Emma, it's me, Shal. Jesse and I are going to get you out of here, okay?" She wanted to comfort her, but also feared crowding her and scaring her again, so she bent over Jesse instead. "You need to undo whatever you put in his head. Emma, please..."  
  
She finally looked up at them. Then Jesse felt the pain rush out of his body, although his breathing was still shaky. It took him a minute to get up.  
  
Emma merely clutched her head again once they were all standing. "It hurts."  
  
"I know. But we're here with you now. We've got you." Jesse was surprisingly quick to offer support considering what she'd just done to him. "Where are you hurt?"  
  
She shook her head. "It's not me..."  
  
-----  
  
He heard the footfalls before he was ready. Somebody had entered the lab and was approaching him, but Brennan was still busy trying to lock the outside out. He no longer wished to see, hear, or feel it. Yet he needed more time; his senses weren't entirely numb yet.  
  
He hated Emma for what she was doing to him. He needed her to hold the madness at bay, and for that he was grateful, yet it wasn't worth the cost of her constantly forcing him to confront reality. If she would only let him go, he'd be lost forever, and he could accept that. Because unlike her, he didn't believe there was still a chance that he could survive this. He no longer wanted to survive it.  
  
When Adam found him, Brennan was lying still, but clearly in great pain. His eyes were tightly closed, and Adam touched his face. He let his head roll to the side but otherwise didn't respond.  
  
"Brennan, wake up," Adam encouraged him with a hushed whisper, trying to fully rouse him without drawing attention.  
  
"No..." he whimpered. His mental wall wasn't complete yet. They were going to cut him, and it wasn't fair that they force him to wake. Why couldn't they just sedate him? Why did they insist upon awareness?  
  
Quickly, Adam tried to assess Brennan's condition. "Brennan, I need you to try to get up," he ordered, wondering if it was safe to move him yet having no choice.  
  
"Why won't you just kill me?" His voice was weak and desperate, and he didn't care. They wanted him broken. Well, he was broken. If they needed him to beg for his own death, then he would beg them. They'd stolen his pride long ago. "Please..."  
  
Adam couldn't believe that he'd been hurt so badly that he was pleading for someone to kill him. "It's me. I'm not going to hurt you." He scanned the papers and folders that were laying on the nearby counter, searching for any notes that would tell him what Brennan was being used for.  
  
"Adam?" The familiar voice sparked an awareness inside of Brennan. It was the voice of a man he'd once called a friend.  
  
He stopped and took a moment to actually look at Brennan. His eyes were now open, yet he truly didn't know who was with him. Adam waved his hand in front of him and there was no response. Christ. Brennan was blind.  
  
"Yeah, it's me," he eventually said. "Shalimar and Jesse are here as well. They'll find Emma."  
  
Brennan nodded weakly in reply. They'd finally come to rescue Emma. He knew Adam valued her too highly to leave her in the hands of Eckhart. "You too," he mumbled. "Go get Emma. That's why you're here."  
  
As Adam began releasing the restraints, he added, "We came for both of you." After finding some tape to wrap Brennan's wrists, he carefully slid the thin poles until they cleared the skin and Brennan's hands were free. He was stunned that Mason would have used such a terrible form of restraint. Then he saw the dried blood in Brennan's palms and was appalled further. He must have had his fists clenched so tightly that his nails had actually pierced his skin.  
  
After stopping the bleeding, Adam tried to help Brennan sit. Brennan made no effort to do so. "I'll help you stand," Adam offered. "Lean on me."  
  
"I can't walk," Brennan stated flatly.  
  
Adam pulled Brennan's arm over his shoulders. "You're going to have to try."  
  
He jerked away. "I *can't* walk," he repeated, emphasizing it strongly.  
  
Suddenly apprehensive, Adam let him go and then picked up the folder he'd shuffled through earlier. There were x-rays inside it. Dreading what he'd see, he held one of the pages of film up toward the light. He quickly returned his gaze to Brennan who was staring blankly at nothing. "Why can't you walk?" he asked slowly, not wanting to hear the answer.  
  
Brennan's expression remained stoic. He'd heard Adam pick up the folder. He knew he'd seen. "Why are you asking? You already know those x-rays are mine."  
  
Holding up the next x-ray, Adam didn't want to believe it. "My god..." he murmured almost silently. He shoved the entire folder into his jacket, deciding to take it with him.  
  
Brennan arched one eyebrow slightly, listening. Had Adam just snatched his charts? Why would he do that if he didn't care about the results of the experiment?  
  
Realization gradually dawned on Adam that it was Brennan's pain he'd felt earlier, not Emma's. She'd been linked with them both. She'd needed him to stop this and he hadn't found them in time. "Brennan, I'm sorry."  
  
What was he apologizing for? Brennan's mind irrationally supplied betrayal. Adam was with him now because it was Adam who was responsible for putting him here in the first place. He'd allowed this. How else could he be here? As an enemy, Eckhart's men would never have let him get this far. And this wasn't even the normal Genomex building, yet Adam had somehow known how to get here. Maybe he'd been being briefed about the testing so far. Maybe he'd been in the loop the entire time.  
  
Maybe now he'd decided to take an active role. Brennan knew of Adam's love for science. This was like his Holy Grail. What if Adam hadn't come to rescue him? Instead he was here to take over the experiment.  
  
When Adam touched him again, Brennan automatically lashed out against him. Eckhart was allowed to cut him and do his cruel experiments, but not Adam. Adam didn't have that right. He wouldn't let himself be hurt by his "friend." His fist made solid contact with flesh. Then his hands were caught and held firmly. Adam was repeating his name over and over, trying to get through to him, telling him not to fight.  
  
When Adam pulled him close so that Brennan was pressed tightly to his body, he felt it. The material of his clothes separated him not from flesh but hard metal. Adam was carrying a gun.  
  
Only the GSA carried weapons. Never Mutant X.  
  
Stillness reigned for a moment, then Brennan threw everything he had at Adam, using any remaining strength to free his hand and make a grab for the gun. He'd wanted Eckhart, but if he could only kill one person, Adam was even better. He'd blow him away and then turn the gun and eat a bullet himself. If he got lucky, neither of them would ever wake up afterwards.  
  
As Brennan caught the gun and pressed it up under Adam's chin, a voice inside his head yelled at him to stop. "So you're my conscience now?" he asked her, his tone somewhat sarcastic. He had his very own Jiminy Cricket.  
  
*You can't kill him, Bren.*  
  
Making sure to cock the gun with one hand, he kept the finger of his other on the trigger. He needed both hands on it to steady his shaking. "Why the hell not?"  
  
*Because it's paranoia. You don't know what you're doing. Adam is our friend.*  
  
Not sure what was going on, Adam tried to talk Brennan down, keeping his tone very calm.  
  
"Shut up!" Brennan snapped, not listening to a single word. Emma's voice momentarily quieted as well as Adam. "Not you. I want you to keep talking so that I know where you are. I can't have you rewiring anything in there."  
  
Adam was completely at a loss now. "Brennan, listen to me..." he said slowly.  
  
"I won't listen to him," he argued with Emma who was telling him the same. "He's one of them! And I am not paranoid or schizophrenic," he added, knowing what they were both thinking since Emma was reading everybody and thoughts were splashing around wildly inside his head.  
  
He couldn't take any more of this. Pushing Adam away from himself, since Emma didn't want him dead and some part of him could never hurt her, Brennan turned the gun and pressed it to his own temple. "I have to make it quiet," he explained. "And you're coming in a bit too loud and clear, so you might wanna vacate the premises when I do this, babe."  
  
"Brennan, give me the gun," Adam said softly, sensing that Brennan was waiting for something, listening to voices that only he could hear.  
  
His hesitation gave Emma the chance she needed to paralyze him, then her presence disappeared. And the next thing Brennan knew, Adam was taking the gun away from him. With his hands suddenly empty, he figured out what she'd just done. She froze him, and then the little bitch had hopped heads. She'd momentarily swapped over to Adam's mind and warned him, told him when to act.  
  
*How could you?* he asked her, feeling betrayed. Then he felt her warmth again. Her answer was simply that she'd had to.  
  
As Adam discarded the gun, Emma was shoving Brennan's mind full of thoughts of peace and serenity. Brennan despised them both. He threw Emma's tranquility right back at her, banishing the artificial calm. He had no desire to accept her meddling. He'd been ready to take his own life, and he deserved the dark thoughts that accompanied the action. He wanted silence, he wanted to scream, he wanted it all to just stop - he wanted the true solace that would only come with death and that Emma could never give him.  
  
Adam returned and tried to comfort him, and Emma begged him to still trust her, but he didn't know what to feel. He didn't know if anything he was feeling was even real. He didn't know friend from foe. Adam had saved his life in the past, and for that alone Brennan hated him. If he'd known about the experiments, Brennan hated him. If he was here to stop them, Brennan hated him for coming too late.  
  
And if they truly meant well, then he hated both Adam and Emma for thinking everyone could be saved. If they lost him, he'd be another strike against the glorious record of perfect saves by the noble Mutant X, and Adam was far too arrogant to allow that. He and Eckhart were locked in an ongoing game of chess, both omnipotent in directing their pieces, taking risks, and making sacrifices. They made all the hard calls. Now the game was getting serious since the generals themselves had taken to the battlefield. The Kings were shifting squares. And neither liked to lose.  
  
At least Eckhart would eventually let him die. He had no desire to protect the pawns. Brennan wondered when Adam would realize that knocking over players didn't matter. Lose the battle, win the war. Of course Adam would make sacrifices and retreats when absolutely necessary, but never before that, never early while greater damage was preventable. In the end, it wouldn't matter. Nobody ever counted the number men left on the chessboard. All that held importance was which side called the checkmate.  
  
Brennan was sick of it all, of the game. Screw it. Suck it up, topple his knight, say good night, and the hell if he cared. He didn't even know whose side Adam was on. There was no good and evil, no heroes and no vicious nemesis. There were only the vigilantes versus the rogue government agency. Hailing from the side of Mutant X certainly didn't make Brennan a champion. It made him a statistic when he would finally fall. Well, score this one for the GSA. Because he wanted out - he wanted to die.  
  
So he merely struggled all the harder, breaking free of Adam and feeling blindly for anything he could use as a weapon. Hatred raged inside him. There was truth in what Eckhart had said about the worst betrayals coming from close friends, family, and lovers. To him, Adam had been both of the firsts. Yet he couldn't lie to himself and believe there'd ever been a chance of Emma being the third.  
  
And he still wanted to either hurt the man who was closer to him than his own father, or kill himself in a way brutal enough to leave him dead. If Emma cared about him at all, she'd allow him that!  
  
In his state of pure panic, Brennan managed to roll himself off the table and fall hard to the floor. He screamed out from the pain. Adam was quickly holding him, comforting, swearing that he wouldn't hurt him.  
  
Exhaustion weighing heavily upon him, Brennan ceased fighting and sobbed. He was acting so foolishly. How had he allowed his faith in Adam to be destroyed? He knew he still trusted Adam enough to lay down his life for him, although at the moment that wasn't saying much. Adam was the one person in the world who he felt truly protected with.  
  
He was just so angry. At everyone.  
  
Brennan wondered what the hell was wrong with him, and decided that - despite Emma - the torture must have driven him insane. Despair and rage most surely shouldn't accompany each other, so perhaps it was merely madness. He wondered if Emma could truly fix him. If Adam did rescue him and take him home, would he still want to die? What would he do with freedom if the suicidal thoughts remained?  
  
*Lie to me,* he pitifully requested once more of Emma. She could tell him yet again how it would all be fine. Adam would have his victory over Eckhart, and they'd return to Sanctuary where Brennan could curl up in his own bed, with Emma snuggled safely beside him, and he would sleep for a week. When he awoke, the drugs would be gone from his system, the time he spent incarcerated here would feel like nothing more than a bad dream, and life would be normal again instead of harsh and unjust. Everything would be as it was. Except Emma would still be at his side.  
  
So she told him all of that was true. Then he passed out in Adam's arms.  
  
"Adam," Shalimar's voice suddenly interrupted through his com-link. "We found Emma and are headed back to the Helix, but... She keeps spacing out, and she almost just collapsed. There's something wrong regarding Brennan."  
  
Shifting the body in his arms, he touched his ring before replying. "I know, I'm with him."  
  
"So he is alive?" The question carried an air of trepidation.  
  
Adam looked down at Brennan who was still unconscious and showed no signs of stirring. He definitely wasn't well, but his breathing was steady and his pulse strong. "Yes."  
  
"Thank God. Adam, how is he?" Jesse's voice this time.  
  
"I don't know yet." That was the best answer Adam could offer at the moment. "I'll meet you at the Helix."  
  
Emma spoke next, sounding a bit dazed. "Adam... he's confused right now. He doesn't..." She trailed off, sniffling. In the background he heard Jesse comforting her and assumed she was crying. "Just don't let him harm himself, okay?"  
  
"I'll keep him safe," Adam promised. "And, Emma, thank you."  
  
He flicked his ring once more to close the com-link, then he returned his full attention to Brennan. In his disoriented state, he could have very easily injured one of them if it hadn't been for Emma's help. Adam prayed the drastic behavior shift was due to whatever drugs Brennan had been given and wasn't a more deeply routed problem. But he'd need to wait until the group returned to Sanctuary to figure things out.  
  
Seeing no other option for moving his passed out team member, Adam hefted Brennan's limp form over his shoulder into a fireman's carry. Getting him all the way back to the Double Helix was going to be quite a strain - he was getting too old for this - but when Adam considered Brennan's own condition, his discomfort at lifting Brennan's weight seemed rather insignificant in comparison.  
  
-----  
  
Emma suddenly stopped walking and pulled away from her worried friends. She rested her shoulder against the wall, feeling worn and practically numb to the constant buzzing inside her mind. She leaned her head to the wall and pressed her hands to it as well, needing the support before closing her eyes and listening. She could hear them like the rumble of an approaching train.  
  
If they were to make it back to the Helix, she, Shalimar, and Jesse would need to leave this hallway and cross through an open section of the complex. Unprepared, they wouldn't make it past the waiting ambush alive.  
  
Having no other choice, she opened herself fully to the hum of what felt like a thousand voices. Jesse was saying something to her, and she covered her ears. She could hear his thoughts, and she didn't need it in surround sound.  
  
She lowered her hands. "I'm okay," she told her friends without actually knowing what words they'd spoken aloud. Their concern would drown her without the reassurance that she was fine.  
  
Focusing, she kept her lock on Brennan and Adam, then she picked out fourteen others from the crowd. That was what they'd be facing.  
  
She couldn't cloak herself, Jesse, and Shalimar. She was too weak from her struggles with Brennan to hold that large of an illusion against over a dozen men. She settled on an easier task and sent out the wave.  
  
"Move," she told her two friends who'd remained stopped with her. She purposefully marched forward. "They've lost their guns; we can take them."  
  
Jesse and Shalimar followed quickly behind her, both somewhat stunned to discover the fourteen men which blocked their path. Yet they'd gone against worse odds and won. All three of the team readied themselves for battle.  
  
They'd be required to fight their way out, a situation that would have been much easier with Brennan's aid. His was the most active power of them all. And Eckhart had been preparing to give it to Emma if the tests had continued...  
  
Emma closed her eyes for a moment and focused. She didn't need science to give her Brennan's gift in order for her to be able to use it. She only needed to make her enemies believe.  
  
-----  
  
"Stop."  
  
Adam paused at the sound of the voice, and footsteps echoed off the floor behind him as someone approached.  
  
"I can't allow you to take him." Jordan nervously cocked his gun. He'd been almost to DeLauro when the alarm had sounded and he'd changed his course. He wasn't certain why he'd abandoned seeking out the girl in favor of returning to check on Mulwray. Maybe he sought to prolong being forced to make his decision of whether or not he could kill her. Maybe he just wanted to be sure that if one the prisoners was rescued, it wouldn't be Brennan who was taken. "Put him down, then raise your hands over your head."  
  
Slowly, Adam turned around. The source of the demand wasn't much more than a kid. He briefly wondered if Eckhart had started recruited people fresh out of high school. The boy couldn't have had more than a couple years of college at the most. The hand that held the gun was shaky, and the white lab coat labeled him as a doctor or a technician, not a security agent. Adam took an educated guess on doctor.  
  
Adam sighed. He was too fresh, too young. Gambling that he wasn't also too eager to take the shot, Adam made a hasty dash to get himself and Brennan around the corner and out of the line of fire.  
  
Anxiety more than anything made Jordan pull the trigger. His target slipped out of sight and he heard the sound of a body - or two - hitting the floor. He quickly prayed that he hadn't accidentally shot Brennan. Practicing on a shooting range was very different than taking aim at an actual person. He took a moment to collect himself.  
  
Blood from the wound to Adam's side mixed with Brennan's where the bandaging on his wrist had been dislodged. Adam carefully touched his own injury. It was a flesh wound, not overly serious. He did a fast check on Brennan before readying himself to deal with the young doctor who'd just shot at them.  
  
Brennan was partially conscious now, roused slightly from oblivion when he'd suddenly impacted with the floor. He didn't think there was a single place on his entire body that didn't hurt. He felt Adam rest a hand on his arm, and he stilled himself, silently waiting. The touch was soft, yet also firm, tense. Brennan translated it as a warning to not move. He cautiously listened, trying to figure out what was going on and if he even cared.  
  
When Jordan rounded the corner, Adam swept out a leg in the hope of knocking him off his feet. He somehow managed to avoid going down, and Adam lunged for him, attempting to grab the hand which held the gun.  
  
There was something wet and sticky on the floor, and Brennan wondered if it was his blood or Adam's. He could hear the sounds of a scuffle, which likely meant Adam was still able to fight. Then he heard something drop heavily and skid across the floor in his direction. His mind instantly identified it as a gun. The next sound he heard was something he desperately hoped wasn't the sound of Adam's head striking the wall. Whatever it was, the noise of fighting ceased.  
  
He blinked his eyes tightly then tried frantically to see. Everything was still just a blurry haze of white. But the fact that there was a blur to see was encouraging. He prayed that it meant this was only temporary as he had no guarantees about whether repeated doses of the chemical would actually wear off.  
  
Something inside his mind told him he was in danger - instinct or Emma, he wasn't certain.  
  
Quickly, he began feeling for the weapon, but instead his fingers met with flesh as another hand grabbed it first. Good guy or bad? The contact lingered for a split second. Then he had his answer as whoever was in front of him suddenly tried to snatch the gun away, but Brennan held firm.  
  
"Jordan..." It wasn't a question. He just knew. He remained still and they were close enough to feel each other's breath. Brennan pondered whether to risk continuing to talk. Common sense told him to let the gun go as a show of good faith, of friendship. If they fought for it, he couldn't win. But he could play this out; he knew Jordan would back down.  
  
Yet he also knew that he wouldn't. Emma and his subconscious were both giving him warnings, and he didn't find it strange that he couldn't tell the two apart. Caution won out, and he kept his grip tight. "Please, Jordan, don't do this. You can come with us instead. We'll grant you asylum and protect you from Eckhart. I promise you. We'll protect you."  
  
"I can't," came the hesitant reply.  
  
Brennan wished he could meet Jordan's eyes, but he was also somewhat relieved that he couldn't, because his eyes might reflect too much. He stared down instead, speaking softly. "I'm not asking you to trust Mutant X. I'm asking you to have faith in me. No teams, just you and me, okay? Both of us on the same side, our own side, and we'll sort out our loyalties later."  
  
Jordan could hardly believe he was actually considering it. Considering giving up his position with the GSA. But who had the power to judge what was right and what's wrong, to say who the good guys are and who's evil? That was something Jordan needed to decide for himself, and something inside him said that what had been done to Brennan wasn't right regardless of his criminal past. And he could never kill Emma either.  
  
But he'd wanted to. He'd been contemplating it, trying to talk himself into it, and his physical nearness to Brennan had allowed those thoughts to pass into Emma's proximity. She was so intently focussed on him that she could read scattered traces from everybody around him.  
  
And so she'd already warned Brennan... as ever so slowly, Jordan let go of the gun. He honestly couldn't say why he did it. There was a part of him that still believed in the research he was doing. Yet looking at Brennan, he seemed so... shattered... as if more hopeless than desperate. Science had destroyed him, all trace of his cockiness and spirit gone. He held no confidence in his request. Outlaw or not, seeing him broken like this was just... Eckhart might as well have asked him to kick a puppy.  
  
"Okay," he said slowly, listening to some inner voice that was gently prodding him to lower his hand and back down, leaving the gun in Brennan's possession. He wasn't defecting to join the ranks of Mutant X, since Brennan never said he had to switch teams. He wasn't being forced or coerced into anything. He was merely setting Brennan free, and everything else they could work out later.  
  
However, once the gun was solely in Brennan's hand, he didn't hesitate even a second to fire it. Jordan had allowed himself to become vulnerable, and Brennan grasped the opportunity to cease control without mercy. Several more shots followed the first in quick procession. "You would have killed her, you son of a bitch, you'd have killed her..."  
  
In a complete state of shock and disbelief, Jordan looked at the blood that ran down his left arm from the bullet wound. The other shots had all impacted the wall at his side. He remained perfectly still, breathing shallowly, aware that Brennan could only aim based on sound and not sight. He then turned his gaze to Brennan, the fact that he'd fired hurting more than the bullet itself.  
  
"Why..." he whispered in confusion, forgetting to be silent. Or maybe he remembered but needing an answer was more important.  
  
He wondered if Brennan would turn on him yet again, the thought terrifying. He wondered what horrible things the DeLauro girl was whispering inside his head. Had she made him do this? His aim had been to the left, and Jordan wondered if he'd been trying for his heart.  
  
Brennan offered no answers. He kept the gun trained on Jordan, listening to his breathing in between his own breaths that were coming deep and fast. Yet his aim was steady and sure. Jordan was the one who was trembling.  
  
Using the momentary adrenaline rush that distracted him from the pain, Jordan surged forward with sudden anger, wrestling the gun from Brennan and then pistol whipping him across the side of his face. "I can't believe you shot me." The words didn't come out as harshly as he intended them, rather they served to make him sound small and afraid.  
  
Brennan pressed his hands to the floor to support his weight as he spit the blood from his mouth. Jordan's blow had split open his lip. He didn't make a move to defend himself from any attack that might follow. He couldn't exactly get up and fight with his legs broken.  
  
Seeing him helpless and in pain, Jordan felt oddly guilty, yet at same time bitterly betrayed. He figured he should have felt more upset, but there was only a deep ache. He held his left arm close to his side, trying not to move it. He had been thinking of killing the girl, and without her governor, she could have known. He wanted to strike Brennan again but held back. "Tell me that she made you do this!"  
  
Brennan's offer had sounded so sincere, but if it were all lies, he'd hurt him back, hurt him for using him like this, and then deliver him back to Eckhart... Deliver him back into a fate less merciful than death.  
  
He held the gun tightly as he stared into Brennan's blank eyes. Then the eyes closed and Brennan whispered an almost silent, "I'm sorry." Jordan wondered if the words were meant for him or Emma, and then Brennan sagged fully limp to the floor.  
  
Hatred turned to automatic concern and Jordan leaned forward. Brennan's breathing was too uneven for sleep or unconscious. He'd merely collapsed. Half suspecting a trick, Jordan touched his cheek, careful to avoid where his strike would soon leave a deep bruise, and he received only a small moan. The skin under his fingers was abnormally warm.  
  
Before Jordan could consider the situation any further, he heard a stirring behind him. Adam was coming around from the stroke of dumb luck that had allowed Jordan to knock him out.  
  
Brennan was vaguely aware of Jordan shifting to leave his side. He had a sinking suspicion that the gun was now being pointed at Adam.  
  
With that knowledge, he willed himself to pass out before he could witness Adam's death. And he finished building the mental barrier that shielded him completely from all external stimuli and also all emotion.  
  
He wrapped Emma's psionic net about his box, picturing his mind in the same way as she did, and the surfaces morphed, giving him safety in its strength. He wished the walls impenetrable, and the seams vanished as his layer of protection shifted and became a perfect sphere around him, locking him in and all else out.  
  
There would be no more pain.  
  
-----  
  
"NO!" Emma screamed - silently or aloud she wasn't certain - losing her grip on Brennan.  
  
With her open eyes, she saw Shalimar and Jesse move forward without her and take on the first of the agents, beginning the fight. Thanks to her, none of them used their guns. But her friends still needed her at their side to lend aid, yet her mind was elsewhere entirely, and she stood frozen, a defenseless statue while she tried to save Brennan.  
  
On some level, she was still receiving the impulses that informed her of what was happening around her, yet she felt torn, stretched over two places at once and hearing the thoughts of the nineteen individuals she was required to focus on all assaulting her mind simultaneously.  
  
The fight continued on without her. Dodge, strike, attack, feint, kick, recover, move... She could see every blow and every counter before it happened. Shalimar's thoughts were on fire, wrapped in the heat of the moment, lost in the game. She was doing very well. Jesse was struggling, but holding his own.  
  
She was having no luck at all getting through to Brennan. Mehler and Adam were just more turmoil. The fourteen agents, downed to eleven conscious, were merely a pain in the ass.  
  
Somebody moved to strike her down, but she remained motionless, safe in the knowledge that Jesse saw him. He massed and shielded her with his own body, continuing to protect her as the fight raged on.  
  
But then he took a hard blow that came from behind. She'd sensed it, he hadn't. He went down, sprawling roughly, not quite catching himself as he hit the floor. The tremor of pain she picked up on was far too strong.  
  
What the hell? Jesse hissed at the stab of pain which laced through his back, biting back his cry. Was he bleeding? There was no way the hit had been that bad, yet the response from Jesse's mind made it seem like his back had practically been ripped apart. And he wasn't getting up.  
  
Shalimar was too occupied with the swarm of men upon her to notice that Jesse had been taken out of the fight. He was barely hanging on to consciousness, struggling desperately to cling to wakefulness. Damn it, he was a sitting duck. And now so was Emma.  
  
Influencing the other situation as much as possible, Emma reluctantly pulled back. She returned herself to where she physical stood, abandoning the minds which remained in some distant part of the building from her.  
  
Two more men had entered, their minds clear, having not been present during Emma's psionic wave. One of them forced a still struggling Jesse to his knees, and then he held his gun to the young man's head. Emma was afraid that, since he'd still been too dazed to put up much of a fight, he wouldn't have the energy left required to phase either.  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
Hmm, I didn't do anything overly cruel to Shalimar this chapter, and I feel kinda bad for leaving her out. However, considering my mood lately, she's safer this way. If I put her in harm's way, I'd likely just kill her since she's fairly insignificant to the overall plot of this story. Be glad I ignore you, Shal!  
  
Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed the extra long chapter. I figured I owed you one. Sadly, you should expect more delays from me, as my life has become a bad screenplay as of late. Wait, scratch that, actually it would make a rather good screenplay. It just sucks for me because I'm not a fictional character. But on the bright side, I can use my experiences for a subplot in a novel some day. Or if I don't, maybe Lanfear will! *grin*  
  
But I can always use reviews and e-mails to cheer me up and keep me writing. Your feedback means the world to me right now - in whatever form it comes. I appreciate both the kind support and the death threats for if I stop writing. It's nice to know you care enough to still be reading after over 85,000 words. 


	37. Checkmates

This chapter is for Ace, simply for being a bitch about not getting her own chapter. No further explanation needed. *wicked grin*  
  
~~~~~  
  
Jordan aimed the gun directly at the man's head. He let his eyes dart quickly to note the blood that was slowly seeping from his adversary's side. And he still watched Jordan far too carefully, stance tense, ready to continue the fight. Brennan must have been worth quite a lot to him. Still was.  
  
He knew this man was prepared to fight to the death for Brennan. "You're Adam." It wasn't a question. He looked long and hard at the man before glancing behind him at Brennan. The latter lay motionless on the floor, not even attempting to move, possibly not even breathing. Jordan quickly returned his attention to Adam so as not to be caught off guard while distracted.  
  
If he were ever to be captured by the other side, Jordan knew Eckhart certainly wouldn't show up in person to rescue him. It was a coin toss whether a retrieval mission would be mounted at all.  
  
He could still hear echoes of the voice that told him to simply put away the gun and all would be fine. For a moment, he wondered if it wasn't Brennan's mind that Emma had taken up residence in, but rather his own. That idea should have made him angry, but he didn't care. He was tired, and he was bleeding. He didn't want this life.  
  
Sighing, he lowered his weapon. "Just go."  
  
After he awkwardly holstered the gun - much to Adam's bewilderment - Jordan turned and knelt beside Brennan, checking for a pulse. He hadn't simply given up - he'd fallen ill. There was no doubt in his mind that Eckhart had used 216, and Brennan was already succumbing to its effects. He brushed the hair back from Brennan's face, not sure if he was even still awake.  
  
Adam stooped by his side, predictably refusing to go without what he came for and also confirming that Brennan was still breathing before easing him away from Jordan. Brennan stirred slightly and flinched in pain, but the action was involuntary and far too unresponsive.  
  
Jordan stared at Adam once more. He wasn't exactly David Duchovny, but he'd do. "Take care of him."  
  
Adam nodded before folding his fingers into a tight fist and decking the young man, efficiently knocking Jordan out cold.  
  
-----  
  
Jesse heard the gun cock somewhere behind his ear. It was an oddly chilling sound. It signified that there was now a bullet in the chamber, and all the agent, who stood slightly out of his view, needed to do was pull the trigger. Jesse didn't dare attempt turning around. He was going to be killed, execution style, with him on his knees... and he'd never so much as see the face of his assassin.  
  
He didn't intend to just let it happen, not while he had a gift that, until recently, he thought made him practically invincible. Yet the odds were stacked very much against him. He would need to phase at the exact right moment - too soon and the man could wait him out and then take the shot when he was forced to take a breath, or too late and Jesse would be dead. And the agent could fire at any time.  
  
Jesse felt himself tremble, his breathing shaky. He wasn't going to be given a single clue as to when it would happen. He couldn't see the finger squeeze down upon the trigger. And by the time he heard the gun fire, the fatal shot would have already ripped through his body. Even if by some miracle he phased perfectly and saved himself from the first bullet, the man likely had a full clip.  
  
Shalimar screamed his name, and he saw her still wrestling with several of the men. The other agent who still carried his weapon had his attention turned to Emma. Jesse caught Shalimar's eyes and his gaze lingered there for no more than a second, but a second in which he tried to convey to her that it would be okay, that he wasn't scared. Then he looked away.  
  
Closing his eyes, Jesse bowed his head and subconsciously tensed as he waited.  
  
Then he heard a thump as the agent behind him hit the floor. Jesse snapped open his eyes and spun around. The man's body convulsed once and then he laid still.  
  
Jesse yelped something in complete shock, having been mere seconds away from most likely losing his life. He wasn't certain if he'd just cursed off a few expletives or perhaps thanked God, but at the moment he didn't exactly care. Shoving himself quickly all the way to his feet, he jumped back from the body and swayed slightly as he tried to figure out what had happened.  
  
The other armed agent was collapsed at Emma's feet. She was standing still, her arm outstretched and her palm aimed in the direction of the man who'd endangered Jesse. Her eyes were dark and cold like Jesse had never seen before.  
  
Emma then tilted her head down and began to use her hands to channel her power, winding it into a coil much in the same way Brennan would. It was the first time Jesse had ever seen her do that. There was no visible sign of her actions that he could see, other than the familiar gesture, but Eckhart's men obviously saw something.  
  
When Emma tossed out her hands, all of the agents surrounding Shalimar crumpled in a wave. The action held a tone of pure rage. When the few remaining men began a hasty retreat, Emma drew another surge into her hands and tossed them down like bowling pins. Jesse and Shalimar both stared at her in shock, not believing what she'd just been able to do.  
  
Emma seemed to get a handle on her emotions as she looked at the bodies which lined their path. "They're just stunned," she said quietly but without a trace of remorse.  
  
At that moment, Jesse knew. She truly had just found a psionic way to use Brennan's power. On some level, it frightened him. Sure, she'd made him see some pretty powerful stuff, and he knew she was far from defenseless, but he'd never considered her as having an active power. Not like the rest of the team. And yet she had just made a room full of men believe she'd had the power to electrocute all of them.  
  
She was different now, changed in a way he couldn't begin to describe, but obviously... unsettled... from whatever Eckhart and his men had done. Something told him she was no longer holding anything back or blocking anything out.  
  
"Are they really only stunned?" None of them were moving.  
  
Emma looked over at him, her expression blank. "Does it matter?"  
  
He wanted to say that it didn't, but he couldn't find his voice. Then one of the fallen men moaned, and relief flooded his heart. Shalimar soon stood beside them, surveying the damage Emma had inflicted with a guarded expression before taking her hand. She then glanced past Emma and caught Jesse's eyes once more with a concerned look, and he realized he was still shaking.  
  
"I'm alright," he told Shalimar, and she seemed to reluctantly accept that before she returned her attention to Emma.  
  
Taking one last, shuddering breath, Jesse forced himself to be fine - for their sake. He'd been in close calls plenty of times before, so he wasn't going to let this one rattle him either. When neither of the girls was looking his way, he slid one hand behind him and under his jacket and shirt, carefully touching his back. He gritted his teeth to keep in the hiss of pain, but when he drew back his hand and looked at his fingers, they were clean. The blood hadn't soaked through the bandaging yet. He'd be fine.  
  
"I need to find Brennan," Emma stated. Then she purposefully began walking.  
  
Walking with her eyes closed, Jesse noted. Her hand still clung to Shalimar's and she seemed to be moving on autopilot, her brow furrowed in deep concentration. He wondered where she'd been when she'd needed to come back in order to save him. He wondered if she regretted it.  
  
Striding at a fast pace through the halls, Jesse cautiously wrapped his arm around the girl at his side, also guiding her steps since it was clear her mind was elsewhere. She was his friend no matter what she was capable of, and for some reason she still seemed fragile despite just felling over a dozen armed men.  
  
-----  
  
The team met back up again near the door where they'd entered. The reunion was heartfelt and brief, no words being exchanged, only concerned and reassuring glances. The bodies had been removed from the floor, leaving them to their own means for disabling the lock.  
  
Jesse automatically set to work without needing to be asked. He carefully ghosted his hand and slid it into the lock, but the mechanism was extremely complex. It was a mess of fine wires. He shook his head. "I could use Bren's help on this one."  
  
As soon as the words were out of his mouth, Jesse regretted them. He wasn't certain what all had been done to Brennan, but it had been bad - that much was painfully clear. What he hadn't read from the computer records, Emma had forced him to experience first hand. Jesse was fairly positive there'd been internal bleeding, and he could only hope the GSA had treated him... Otherwise Brennan could very well be dying. And as to the time of death that had been noted in his file, well, that one remained a mystery Jesse wasn't so sure he wanted an answer to. Whatever the case, it wasn't likely he'd be waking up any time soon.  
  
Shalimar was helping Adam to gently lower him to the floor. Nobody had mentioned Adam's own injury, and he hadn't mentioned that Emma was leaning against the wall looking just about ready to faint at any second. Except for Shalimar, they were all in pretty bad shape and just left it at that. Their wounds could be tended to and worried about once they were safely back home.  
  
In the meantime, a locked door stood between them and the Double Helix.  
  
Emma crumpled to her knees at Brennan's side, and Shalimar and Adam both gave her room. None of them had ever seen the Psionic look so sad. She was crying silently as she slipped her hand into Brennan's. Jesse half expected Brennan's fingers to curl around hers, yet he made no move.  
  
"I can go find somebody to lend us a hand," Shalimar offered, pausing in her efforts to inspect Adam's side without looking like she was trying to doctor him. She glanced over at Jesse.  
  
"We'll call that plan B." Jesse massed his fist and smashed the panel, then he removed the broken pieces and began trying to figure out the wiring underneath. "Why don't you see if you can bandage up Adam while I attempt to hotwire this thing?"  
  
Avoiding Shalimar with a mumble of "I'm fine, really," Adam stooped beside Emma.  
  
Shalimar threw her hands up in the air in defeat. Adam was going to be his usual stubborn self and wait until his team was safely home and on the mend before acknowledging that he'd gotten himself shot. She huffed in annoyance before beginning a restless pacing. She hated that she was standing around and not doing anything.  
  
"Is it possible for you to wake him?" Adam asked Emma, lightly squeezing her shoulder in a gesture of support. His tone and expression implied that he wasn't certain Brennan being lucid would be a good thing, yet he was also worried that it wasn't wise to let him sleep until they better knew the extent of his injuries. It could be dangerous for Brennan to remain unconscious.  
  
Emma had her forehead resting against Brennan's, and she was cupping his face in her palms, gently caressing his cheek with the most tender of touches. But she looked up at Adam, her large eyes like pools of crystal water, practically turned to liquid from her tears. "Adam... He is awake."  
  
At her statement, Jesse momentarily froze in his work. That wasn't possible. He turned to stare at Emma, and he watched as Adam quickly began checking Brennan's pulse and breathing and whatever else he was capable of doing without any equipment. But there was no way Brennan was conscious, not with him so completely unresponsive. If he was awake, then he was just... gone. He knew Emma wasn't even reaching him, it was written all over her tear-streaked face. There was no way the situation could be this bad.  
  
Stopping her almost frenzied pacing, Shalimar just stood helplessly. Emma was right. Using her enhanced Feral senses, she could tell there was something off with the way Brennan was sleeping. She wasn't certain what exactly was wrong, though, and she definitely wasn't going to be the one to voice the theory that Brennan was catatonic.  
  
She couldn't take much more of this. Twenty more seconds, and then she was hunting down and kicking some GS agent ass.  
  
Adam gripped Brennan's hand. "Brennan. If you can hear me, I want you to squeeze my hand, okay?" There wasn't even the slightest bit of pressure in response to the request. Adam wondered if checking his eyes would be of any use. He had no light with him to use for checking pupil dilation, and with Brennan's blindness that test might be worthless anyway. Adam had no way of knowing. They needed to get him back to Sanctuary.  
  
"Jesse." Shalimar's troubled voice interrupted his thoughts, and he moved his gaze up from where it had been fixed on Brennan. "The door."  
  
Oh. Right. "I'm sorry," he quickly mumbled in reply, resuming the forgotten task. In a matter of seconds, the lock suddenly disengaged.  
  
Noticing his success, Shalimar gave him a brief smile that didn't reach her eyes. Then she hurriedly went about helping Adam with Brennan. She wanted to aid him in carrying their teammate, but then she saw that Emma was still sitting on the floor.  
  
"Emma, come on," she coaxed, kneeling in front of her and taking her hand. Emma's gaze was blank, and her breathing was strange. Shalimar slid her fingers along her wrist, feeling her pulse. Whatever kind of trance she was in, her current state was an eerily near match to Brennan's. "Hey, sweetie, wake up, okay? I know you wanna help Bren, but we need you in the here and now right now."  
  
After finishing shoving the door open, Jesse looked over his shoulder at the two girls. "Shal? Emma?"  
  
"I've got her," Shalimar answered. "Get to the Helix. We're right behind you."  
  
Ignoring the command, Jesse rushed back for them. He helped pull Emma to her feet while Shalimar opted for slapping her across the face and then yanking her arm over her shoulder. Emma seemed to snap back to herself and blinked at them in confusion before stumbling along in toe as she was dragged through the door.  
  
Pausing for a moment, Jesse let Shalimar take Emma. They couldn't fit three-wide through the door, so he settled for watching their backs and being the last one out. He glanced nervously behind them at the empty halls. He didn't like this. It was too easy. He stared at the wires again in bewilderment before following the others through to the outside. It should have taken him longer to figure out what connection would override the lock, and he wasn't one to put much faith in luck.  
  
"Guys, I'm not entirely certain it was me who opened the--" Jesse cut himself off upon noticing the dozens of red dots that danced upon their chests. "Damn."  
  
Spotlights began bursting on all around them, illuminating the roof against the darkening sky. Several lines of guards spanned the width of the building, completely blocking their path. There were about forty in number, all armed, the majority of their laser-sights trained on Emma.  
  
Taking a step forward, Jesse placed himself protectively in front of his team. There was no way Emma could take this on. Her arm was still draped across Shalimar's shoulder and she was being supported as if dead weight.  
  
From the mass of agents, a lone figure emerged, his white hair a stark contrast that instantly identified him. Taking a gun from one of his lackeys, he turned it away from the Mutant X team, pointing it in the opposite direction. The beam from the sight broke as it hit the Double Helix, the light bending, contorted from shining against the surface of the cloak, significantly displacing the red dot.  
  
"Now honestly, Adam, did you truly believe you could land a plane on my roof unnoticed?"  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
Author's notes:  
  
For those of you wondering, the David Duchovny mention was in reference to Brennan and Jordan's conversation about role models in the chapter "Heroes."  
  
Emma doesn't use her psionic blast and Jesse doesn't just phase the door because when I came up with this story, MX was still in season one. So for this story, none of them have had their powers ramped up yet.  
  
This chapter was only beta-read by Lanfear because she's the only one I managed to get it sent off to before I became netless due to a hardware problem.  
  
And no, I have not abandoned this story, but all the concern was very flattering. I simple wrote a different story while I was offline because I was borrowing a different computer. For those of you who have trouble finding things with this story to leave constructive criticism about, you might have better luck with the other. It's titled "Noah Kilmartin's Son" and is written entirely in the first person (which is something I seldom do). Also, the first two reviews on it were from Lanfear and Ace. You guys are so predictable! I love ya.  
  
Oh, and there was no offense meant in my dedication of this chapter to Ace. She knows that, but just in case everybody else doesn't, I'm official stating that I think she rocks. Any teasing and tormenting is all strictly in good fun.  
  
And finally, it might be a while before the next chapter because I'm thinking of making it the last of Part One. But I'm not ending this where or how I originally planned, so it's going to take me a bit before I get it written.  
  
That is all. Now please direct your attention to the little "Go" button beside the "Submit Review" option. I felt sort of off while writing this chapter, so comments (good or bad) are very much wanted. Thanks! 


	38. Kings

I hadn't realized it had been so long since I updated this until I was putting the finishing touches on a different story that some friends and I completed in the time since I last posted a chapter of this one. So I've made you all wait an entire fic! I'm so sorry! I was actually going to abandon this one, but I just got another handful of requests that I continue it. You guys and your sense of timing!  
  
So I'm back, although without a muse since I heard that LLS is leaving the show. I haven't even been able to read MX stories lately.  
  
And yet here's the next chapter. You can thank Audrey and Ace for it because it was mainly their encouragement and pestering that persuaded me to continue. And as always, Lanfear has been incredible in putting up with my insanity and beta'ing for me.  
  
Okay okay, no more notes, on with the story...  
  
-----  
  
-----  
  
Jesse felt all of his muscles tense, subconsciously readying himself for the need to mass, to fight, or perhaps to flee. And yet after Eckhart's words, silence settled over the two sides as they stood on the roof, finally facing an all-out confrontation. All the key players were present. But he waited, and no bullets ripped through the air to turn this into a battlefield.  
  
At least, not yet.  
  
It still felt entirely wrong, however. There didn't seem to be any escape, and the feeling of dread settled and took root. The quiet itself was foreboding.  
  
No matter how long they stood there, something would inevitably happen. He noticed that he was already holding his breath, and he reminded himself, for now at least, to keep breathing. Inhale. Then exhale. Until it was time to phase.  
  
Other than just breathing, what else could he do when he knew something terrible was going to happen? They couldn't go back into the complex, and they couldn't be the ones to start this fight. The only path of action was to walk straight ahead. So, bracing himself, Jesse took another step forward, and the others all followed suit as they strode confidently - more so than they felt - jaws set in determination, and approached the daunting figure of Mason Eckhart.  
  
He walked calmly toward them, and his snipers moved to stand at all sides of the roof, surrounding them and fencing them in, red dots still dancing across the clothes worn by the members of Mutant X.  
  
Then everything stopped, frozen now that the stage was set and all marks had been found. So Jesse, along with everyone else, just stood still once more. And then Adam touched his arm.  
  
Confronting Eckhart was something Adam needed to do. Without the rest of his team, Jesse worried. Eckhart seemed to be waiting for him, not coming any closer, and yet he was several paces from his agents now. Whatever came next would only be between the two of them.  
  
Nothing was said as Adam shrugged Brennan from his shoulder, shifting his weight over to Jesse who took the burden without complaint since Shalimar was still glued to Emma - or perhaps it was the other way around, he couldn't be certain. He only offered a slight groan when accepting the heavy load. But they'd all been trained in how to carry more than their own weight in case of circumstances like this. In fact, at the moment, Jesse probably would have made any fireman proud.  
  
"Careful," Adam solemnly cautioned him, "both his legs are broken."  
  
The comment made Jesse feel ill, but he simply set his jaw once more and nodded. He would bear the emotional pain right along with the physical strain to his wounded back, and he would suffer both in silence. He briefly caught Adam's eyes. "He's lost weight, hasn't he?" Brennan weighed a ton, yet he didn't quite weigh enough.  
  
"Yes." The answer was clipped, and Adam quickly turned away and began walking in the direction of Eckhart.  
  
With no other option, Jesse was forced to do nothing except watch him go.  
  
-----  
  
GS agents fully boxed in the field for this meeting, having assumed positions around all four sides. That left four members of Mutant X at one end of the large roof, the Double Helix at the other, and Adam and Mason alone in the center.  
  
Cutting directly to the point, Adam asked, "What is it that you want, Mason?"  
  
He reached forward and opened Adam's jacket, then he lifted Brennan's file free and flipped through it for the proper page which he returned to Adam. "The same thing you do. I'm sure you recognize that."  
  
After snatching the offered printout none too gently from Mason's gloved fingers, he stared at the information. It only took a moment for Adam to understand what he was seeing. "This is impossible."  
  
"It's far better than impossible, my old friend," Mason told him, truly pleased with the results of the experiment thus far. "It's perfect."  
  
"How..." Adam trailed off, astounded at what he was being presented with. He'd only ever imagined this... but here it was in black and white, very real.  
  
"Your theories and ground work were all sound, of course," Mason said with a nonchalant wave of his hand. "It was all just a matter of field testing, really."  
  
Mason took the page from him and returned it to the folder. "I'm certain you'd much prefer to see the real thing. Why don't we take a walk down to the labs, I'll give you the full tour, and I'm sure we can discuss this as colleagues."  
  
Adam suddenly looked up, practically gaping. "Excuse me?"  
  
"I would think what I'm offering is rather clear," stated Mason obviously. He spoke in a normal tone at a casual volume, not whispers of a conspirator's secret offer, and also not a harsh threat that would travel to within earshot of his team. He simply talked, like one old friend to another. "I want you to join me in helping to complete the research."  
  
Adam took a moment and shook his head, turning away and pacing a few steps while he thought about what was just said. The two of them working together again was absurd. And yet... "It's stable?" he asked, turning back to face Mason once more. He couldn't deny how much he wanted this.  
  
"Not yet, but it will be," he replied, pleasantly surprised that Adam was hearing him out. "Another injection to Mulwray and we'll know for certain."  
  
Bringing up Brennan had been a bad move, and Adam visibly angered. "Why is he sick?" He glanced back over his shoulder at where his team waited. They'd laid Brennan down again and were all stooped at his side. "Damn it, Mason, why one of my team!"  
  
It was more just an upset shout than an actual question, but he answered regardless. "He fit the profile." It was all as simple as that. "His current condition is merely a precaution in case you stubbornly see fit to hop back on your high horse and refuse my more than generous proposition."  
  
"Did you honestly think I might say yes to this?" It was almost an outrage that Adam had even listened to this for a second, much less actually considered it. But he sure as hell wasn't about to agree to it!  
  
"Accomplishment of mutual goals."  
  
"No." Adam tightened his hands into fists. "Not anymore."  
  
Mason had the gall to look somewhat disappointed, although the refusal must have been anticipated. "Might I inquire as to why? If it's the choice of subject, I'll make sure none of the future ones are taken from Mutant X. They'll be granted complete immunity."  
  
"The answer is still no. And it doesn't matter whom you choose to hurt. I'm rejecting this because I'm a better man that that." He would not do further harm in the name of science.  
  
Mason slightly raised his eyebrows above the rim of his glasses. "And when exactly did you adopt such exempt moral standards? If I recall, they were absent during our previous partnership."  
  
At that, all restraint vanished and Adam decked him, sending him stumbling back several paces. "I said I was the better man. I made no claims of being a good man." Then he became increasingly aware of the number of laser sights trained upon him, and he raised his hands in a gesture of backing down, allowing Eckhart to regain his composure.  
  
From across the roof, he heard Shalimar yell out for him to "hit the rotten bastard again." He sighed wearily and left one hand up in a signal for her to be silent.  
  
Mason smoothed a wrinkle from his jacket. That reaction was to be expected, though it would not be tolerated a second time. For someone who claimed to be the better man, Adam wasn't overly bright in letting his temper make a fool of him.  
  
"You're risking your own life this time, my old friend?" He waited for Adam's reply but continued when he received none. "You should never risk yourself. I thought you were far smarter than that. Only your team is expendable. Without you, the war we've created is over."  
  
"My team isn't expendable." The response was firm.  
  
"We both have our freaks, you and I. They're merely mice while we're generals. If you can't make the hard calls, Adam, you might as well just throw in the towel right here and now. So tell me..." He glanced beyond Adam to view Shalimar, Jesse, Emma, and Brennan. "Are they you're team, or your children?"  
  
"What answer is it that I'm supposed to give?" Adam requested, trying to restore his sense of calm despite the infuriating situation. "If you want to know if I would risk their lives, the answer is yes, and I have done so many times. Would I risk my own life for them? That answer is yes as well. So you tell me, Mason."  
  
In reply, Eckhart motioned to several of his agents and called them over. "Bring Mulwray," he instructed.  
  
Adam watched while they did as ordered, and while other agents were required to hold back Shalimar and Jesse. Emma merely clung to Brennan, then fought when she was torn away from him but her actions had no strength behind them. She'd completely drained herself, and so she was simply deposited in a crumbled heap and then, for the most part, ignored.  
  
Brennan was dragged away despite angry protests from Shalimar and glares from Jesse, but the two knew better than to start an actual fight - they couldn't win. Then Brennan was very literally dropped at Eckhart's feet, Adam's attempt to catch him and prevent further injury coming a moment too late.  
  
It sickened Adam that they saw fit to toss him down like that with him unconscious. "You bastards," he muttered under his breath as they withdrew to stand in the background once more  
  
"Do you prefer this, rather than finding him dead?" Mason asked, gazing down at Adam as he remained stooped over Brennan, monitoring his pulse and breathing.  
  
"Yes." The reply came without Adam even glancing up.  
  
"He's been tortured and his mind is virtually gone. The virus I've introduced to his system is slowly but surely killing him, and causing no end of pain, I might add. Is it still preferable? Alive no matter what?"  
  
Adam hesitated just a fraction too long to answer, wondering what the point of all this was, and Mason drew a handgun from somewhere inside his jacket. He loaded a clip and chambered a single round, then he removed the clip, and to Adam's complete disbelief, turned the gun in his hand and offered it to him.  
  
Adam stared in bewildered astonishment at the gun as Mason held it out to him. What kind of game was this?  
  
"Take it," he was instructed. "But don't get any foolhardy notions of killing me, or my men will kill you and your entire team before my body hits the ground."  
  
Carefully, Adam took the weapon from Mason's hand. So now what? He looked at the other man, awaiting explanation.  
  
"I'm offering you a choice," Mason announced. "You can end his life now, quickly and mercifully, or you can accept my offer and help continue the tests."  
  
Adam stood still. He didn't appreciate being toyed with and couldn't imagine how twisted Eckhart must be to derive any pleasure from this, yet he looked very serious. He honestly expected Adam to make a choice. "Your experiments are barbaric."  
  
"You're quite correct. And I assure you, they will get worse. Would you like me to tell you what I would have had done to him?" Just because Adam wasn't going to join him, that was no reason to give up trying to destroy Mutant X another way.  
  
Adam said nothing, the handle of the gun feeling strangely metallic and simultaneously sentient beneath his fingers, as though the weapon itself pulsed with life, waiting for a litany of horrors that never came. He wondered how he was even able to aim without his arm shaking. Eckhart observed silently from his position at Adam's side, a half-smile playing on his lips as if eager to tell of the brutalities he had inflicted and others he had yet to try. However, no words came, so it would appear he'd decided to let Adam's imagination fill in all the blanks.  
  
And imagination wasn't something to be taken lightly as it provided a more vivid and terrible picture than any mere words could. So Adam leveled the gun steadily, and at this range, his shot would be perfect. One bullet to either Brennan's head or his heart and this nightmare would be over for him. Adam was being given the power to end it. All he had to do was pull the trigger.  
  
"He is already suicidal," Mason eventually remarked. "But none of his own attempts will be permitted to succeed, and he will hate you for allowing his life to continue."  
  
The gun was heavy in Adam's hand. This was the game. Mason was forcing him to kill one of his own... with the rest of his team all there to witness it.  
  
It was the lesser of two evils. Adam wanted to close his eyes, unable to focus his shot with the target being Brennan, yet he couldn't look away. If it were a stranger, it would be different. But this was somebody he'd taken into his life, shared his home with, and made part of his family. In the event that something ever happened to Adam, it was Brennan he'd been sculpting to take his place as the leader of Mutant X. He saw a lot of himself in the young man.  
  
He'd been trying to distance himself over the past few days in case he ended up losing part of his team - casualties were to be expected in hostage situations - yet this was one of the hardest moments of his life...  
  
"ADAM!"  
  
Jesse's sudden shout cut through the night air and broke him from his trance. He glanced over as more of Eckhart's agents moved in to restrain the young man, but they didn't injure him. And Adam knew he'd likely only called out because Emma was now curled up with her hands pressed over her ears and her eyes squeezed tightly shut, sobbing while Shalimar managed to pull free from the men who held her and all but cradled the weeping girl in her arms, trying to soothe her. She flashed her eyes feral when the GS agents attempted to pull her away.  
  
His team likely wouldn't survive tonight, no matter the outcome. Yet he would not - could not - kill Brennan. He flipped the gun and extended the handle for Mason to take.  
  
"That, my old friend," Eckhart said, referring not to the decision to spare Brennan's life but to the fact that it proved he'd chosen to take on the role of father as well as leader, "is why you will fail, and I will win."  
  
Having spoken all that needed to be said, Mason walked by Adam, heading back inside the building, his agents all following like tin soldiers connected by a string. Safe in his assurance that he held the upper hand, he saw no reason to bring an end to his enjoyment of the game just yet. Adam had just confirmed what the outcome would be. They would meet again very soon.  
  
-----  
  
Jesse glared at Eckhart as he approached. The man only stopped and looked at him for a second, then he turned to the guard who restrained him. "Release him. They're all free to go."  
  
And then he simply continued on into the building, and none of his men questioned him, blindly following. Jesse merely gaped, then he rushed over to Adam. "Why would he do that? What did he say to you?"  
  
"Not now, Jesse," Adam replied wearily, stopping his questioning. "Help me with Brennan."  
  
The protest formed on his lips, wanting to know why they'd just been set free, but he merely closed his mouth again without speaking. Perhaps it was best to just accept this and not worry what price tag their freedom had attached to it.  
  
"I've got him," he said about Brennan. "Go make sure Emma's okay."  
  
Adam gave a tilt of his head in acknowledgement before leaving Jesse's side. Then Jesse pulled Brennan over his shoulder and strained to stand back up. The pain was worse than he thought it would be, and for a moment he regretted telling Adam he had it covered. Help would have been nice, but on the other hand, Emma likely needed Adam's attention right now, so Jesse really didn't have a choice but to handle carrying his friend back to the Helix on his own.  
  
His stride became more unsteady the farther he walked, and he focused on drawing deep breaths. The ache in his back had turned to a vicious throbbing, but he refused to black out even for a second. And he felt much better when the rest of the team caught up with him. Emma was at least walking on her own, and soon they'd be in the air, and it was hopefully smooth sailing after that.  
  
Yet even as they approached the Helix, Brennan safely hefted over his shoulder and Adam, Shalimar, and Emma by his side, Jesse's uneasy feeling from earlier reasserted itself. They were being allowed to just walk away. It was as simple as that, and they were leaving all this behind them. But the nagging thought stayed with him. What do you do when you're certain something terrible lies ahead of you, yet there's no other direction for you to go?  
  
Maybe, if they were lucky, whatever terrible turn of events that was lurking in wait would once more pass them by. Jesse could only hope that would be the case, and for one of the few times in his life, he seriously prayed, seeking a higher power than the luck which so often guided them. Of course, Jesse knew it wasn't purely luck - it was training, preparation, and smart thinking. Although, this time, they hadn't defeated Eckhart with good plans or superior cunning. He was letting them go. Half expecting another bullet in the back as they walked the last few steps to the comforting reassurance of the Double Helix, putting all his faith in luck seemed somehow not enough.  
  
As if sensing Jesse's apprehension, Adam moved to help support Brennan's weight. "Let's get him home."  
  
-----  
  
TBC...  
  
I thought I was going to end Part One here and give some of you guys a chance to jump ship, which ya might wanna do anyway, but I've decided to push ahead and try to go with my original plan. So here's hoping I'll be able to write Emma again, because she's rather important to the next chapter, and right now I'm still without inspiration. 


	39. Returns

Author's note:  
  
I did abandon this story (would have posted a chapter saying so, but ff.net seemingly frowns upon that for some reason, so I only stuck a note in my bio). After "Crossroads of the Soul" and Lauren's departure, I jumped ship as far as MX was concerned. I've loyally sunk with far too many fandoms, and I didn't want to put myself through that again.  
  
But I do still love the idea of Mutant X that exists inside my head if not in reality. And you guys are all wonderful - I've made some incredible friends.  
  
Now moving on to what you're skimming this note for: I've been convinced that I need to finish "The Messiah Strand" for those still seeking an ending and also as something I need to do for myself. Although I've no plans for resuming part two, "The Kings of Men" (but Cyndi can tell you it really wasn't any good, so you're not missing anything there).  
  
The reason I was able to leave this story is simply that NoS had always been something I was writing just for me (I'm always writing, it's like breathing, it's just something I do). So I have over 50,000 more words of this story that nobody else has even seen. So basically, I wrote my ending, and I thought I could leave it behind. However, NoS changed from just being a release for me when I started posting it and it evolved into an actual story. And you guys need, and deserve, an actual ending and not just random meandering scenes, thoughts, and outlines. So your ending for "The Messiah Strand" is a neatly structured single chapter. Only I never wrote it. But that is what I'm attempting to do now, seeing as some of you are utterly relentless and I shan't have any peace until I do (you know who you are - and thank you g). Oh, except that this is going to be two chapters since I couldn't find my flow. Sorry.  
  
That said, this chapter is for Cyndi, since I don't recall ever dedicating one to her. I know you would support and encourage me in any venture, and for that I'm thankful.  
  
~~~~~  
  
~~~~~  
  
"Next time, I get to hit him too," Shalimar stated once they were all onboard the Double Helix, her eyes glowing menacingly.  
  
With one look at her, Adam nodded. "Agreed." He glanced at his sore knuckles before returning his attentions to Brennan.  
  
As Adam settled Brennan on the floor, Jesse left their side and immediately set about powering up and preparing them for takeoff. But he turned in his seat and watched Emma for a moment as she let go of Shal and clung instead to Brennan. Several strands of hair shielded her face from view, but he knew she was still crying.  
  
"I want you to try to get him lucid," Adam requested tersely, still kneeling beside their ill teammate. And it was obvious now that Brennan was indeed very sick, with an escalating fever.  
  
"I can't..." Emma cried, shaking her head as she tenderly brushed back Brennan's sweat-damp hair. "Besides, he needs to sleep... After that, he'll be better." She lifted her hand to wipe at her own eyes before lowering it to slide it into Brennan's, their fingers intertwined. "He has to get better..."  
  
"Emma, I know he needs to sleep, but it will be easier for me to treat him if he can tell me what's wrong first." He placed his hand under her chin to gently lift her face so that she had to look at him. His next words weren't a suggestion but an order. "Wake him."  
  
"Adam," Jesse called, breaking his focus away from Brennan and Emma. "What do you want me to do?"  
  
"Get us in the air," Adam replied, exasperated. Jesse should have been able to fly them home without needing to get permission first.  
  
"Yeah, I'm already on it," Jesse shot back, trying not to get agitated with Adam. "I'm also already running a scan, but it's going to take another several minutes to finish."  
  
Adam finally looked over at him. "What?"  
  
Jesse tapped one of the screens. "I guess it's my turn to play devil's advocate here, but what if Eckhart has tagged the Helix... or Brennan?"  
  
"Shit." Cursing again, Adam got up to take the co-pilot seat next to Jesse's, checking all the readings for himself. It seemed rather unoriginal for Mason to pull the same scheme twice, but he'd already proven that Adam wouldn't just let Brennan die. They needed to return to Sanctuary. He pinched the bridge of his nose, feeling the start of yet another headache.  
  
His expression changing from frustration to concern, Jesse studied Adam. One of his hands was pressed against the console he was leaning over, but the other was being firmly held to his side where he'd been shot.  
  
"Take us home," he eventually told Jesse, resigned. "If we are being tracked, there isn't anything we can do about it."  
  
"Yeah okay," Jesse replied, quickly doing as he was told and piloting them back to Sanctuary. If Eckhart followed them, well, they'd just hang themselves from that bridge when they came to it. He quickly shoved aside his bitterness. When he'd been the one who was hurt, Adam had agreed not to compromise their location by taking him home. But Adam hadn't even given this decision a second thought. Jesse told himself this was different, and he knew it was the right call. But still... He sighed, thinking a little more hesitation would have been nice.  
  
He shook himself mentally, berating himself for even allowing that feeling to cross his mind.  
  
As Adam returned to Brennan's side, Shalimar offered him the med kit. "What do you need?" He began assessing Brennan's injuries and she placed her hand on his arm to get his attention. "Adam, I asked what *you* need."  
  
Frowning deeply, he glanced at the hand he'd been keeping pressed over his wound and noticed his palm was smeared with blood. He needed to take care of his own injury before tending to Brennan. He silently swore as he pulled off his jacket and unbuttoned his shirt, allowing Shalimar to help him bandage the wound.  
  
Emma stayed close to Brennan, feeling alone now that his mind was blank to her. Their connection was still there on some level, but the link lacked substance. She knew that there was pain, but she couldn't tell if Brennan was lucid enough to be aware of it. She feared that he'd become completely catatonic. That thought was unacceptable, and she tried to force her way deeper into his mind. She refused to allow him to give up. Not after all they'd been through. She mentally shoved even harder.  
  
Brennan's breathing suddenly became a deep gasping, and then his back arched up slightly as the gasps turned to choking. Emma instantly pulled away from him, giving Adam space. She dropped her hands into her lap, watching helplessly as the man she loved went into a violent seizure.  
  
"I'm sorry," she said quickly. "I didn't mean to-- I'm sorry!"  
  
Adam couldn't afford even a second to console the distressed girl. He immediately moved to hold down Brennan's shoulders, trying to keep him from injuring himself as the spasms intensified. "Jesse!" he called urgently. "Get back here."  
  
After switching the Helix controls over to auto-pilot, Jesse rushed to help, dropping to his knees beside Emma. She backed off even farther, afraid of getting in the way.  
  
"Try to hold him down," Adam instructed, letting Jesse take over his position as he moved to strictly working on keeping Brennan's head still as he tossed. "Shalimar, check the med kit for Valium."  
  
Shalimar rummaged through the kit's contents of pills and syringes. "We don't have any," she replied nervously.  
  
Jesse winced when he heard that, but Adam's expression made it clear he suspected as much. They had nothing to give Brennan to stop the seizure. His body continued to convulse beneath their grip.  
  
"Let's roll him onto his side," Adam ordered, afraid Brennan would choke on his own vomit. Shalimar ditched the med kit to help. Emma remained at a distance, wringing her hands and tightly twisting the material of her shirt.  
  
Thankfully, at that moment, the seizure finally spasmed out, and they eased Brennan onto his back once more. His breathing, however, stayed too labored for any of them to relax.  
  
Adam finally looked to Emma. "You didn't cause this," he told her, even though she reacted by pulling her knees up against her chest. She kept crying heartbreaking, uncontrollable sobs. "The seizure was due to whatever drugs Eckhart gave him, not anything you did."  
  
"Adam," Shalimar said as Brennan writhed slightly, "shouldn't we give him something for the pain?"  
  
He felt heartless as he answered, "No. Not until I've run some tests." He couldn't risk the drugs causing a reaction. He needed to know what Mason had done before trying to fight it. A case of anaphylactic shock right now would almost surely kill Brennan.  
  
As Jesse moved to comfort Emma, Adam stopped him. "I need you back at the controls, Jesse. Prepare for landing and get us down as quickly as possible. There's nothing I can do if Brennan goes into cardiac arrest while we're still in the air."  
  
Jesse frowned. "But that's not going to happen, right?" Adam didn't answer, and that worried Jesse more than any reply could have. He hadn't known it was that bad. Brennan couldn't die.  
  
Jesse quickly reassured himself that his friend was too stubborn to give up while being rescued.  
  
-----  
  
After helping to move Brennan to the lab, Jesse reluctantly left his friend's side and returned to the Double Helix. Adam had already run a scan which proved Brennan was clean of tracking devices, so now all that was left to do was to go over the Helix with a fine-toothed comb. Jesse had assigned himself the task without needing to be asked. Although his preliminary scans had turned up nothing, he wouldn't be satisfied until he'd gone over every inch of the plane. Eckhart could have used a device that wouldn't become active until the engines were shut down.  
  
But first things first. Emma was still huddled in the corner of the craft, crying quietly. Jesse stooped by her side. "You should go to the lab," he said gently. "Adam will want to make sure you're okay."  
  
"I'm not," she replied, concerning Jesse greatly. "But it isn't anything Adam can fix."  
  
He pushed her hair back and used his jacket sleeve to dry her face. "You should still have him check you out, okay? And it will probably help Brennan to have you with him."  
  
At that, she pulled back away from Jesse. "I don't want to hurt him anymore."  
  
"Hey, Emma, you could never hurt Brennan... You love him." That much had become rather obvious.  
  
"But I am. I keep breaking down his defenses and forcing him to face what's been done to him. I told myself I was doing it for him, but I did it because I'm too selfish to lose him. I need him! I should have been helping to control his pain, but instead I caused him to have a seizure."  
  
She sniffled, and Jesse thought she was going to push him away again, but instead she latched onto his shirt and wiped her eyes with it. He wrapped his arm around her and rubbed her back, trying to comfort her. She allowed the embrace and leaned against him, sniffling once more and then using his shirt to wipe her nose this time. He merely sighed and kept holding her.  
  
"That wasn't you, Emma. Adam said it was due to the drugs. That was Eckhart - it wasn't your fault." He hated seeing her so distraught.  
  
"It was my fault, Jesse. He is in so much agony because of me. He tried to shield himself from it, but I wouldn't let him. I cracked it so that he couldn't lock me out as well." She'd broken the sphere he'd built inside his mind to protect himself. Yet, despite her meddling, he hadn't woken... and although the bind between them remained, she received no communication through the link, as though he had no awareness of her at all.  
  
And she couldn't go to him now, because she'd be forced to mend what she'd done. If she saw him suffering, she knew she'd let their link go if it would provide him any peace. She paused before continuing to speak with Jesse. "If I let him surrender and close everything out, it's like I've given him permission to die."  
  
He grabbed Emma's shoulders and held her so that she had to face him. He wasn't certain what exactly was going on between her and Brennan, but he was close to throwing her over his shoulder and dragging her kicking and screaming to the lab, although he'd much prefer she go willingly. "I'll let you do whatever you feel is right regarding Brennan, but even if you can't be with him right now, you still need to go have Adam make sure you're not hurt. Right now, you're in shock, and you could have injuries that you don't even feel."  
  
She shakily got to her feet. "Okay, I'll go get checked out... but only after Adam's done fixing up Bren. I don't want to distract him if he's busy..."  
  
With a nod, Jesse replied, "Sounds like a deal. You want me to walk with you to the lab?"  
  
"No..." she answered hesitantly. Jesse had things he needed to do, and she could manage on her own. But she stopped before leaving the Helix and looked back at him. "Jess... are you alright?"  
  
He gave her what he hoped was a reassuring smile. "Yeah, I'm good." He wondered if her thoughts were focused enough on Brennan that she wouldn't be able to tell if he was lying.  
  
She studied him suspiciously for a moment. He met her eyes briefly and his gaze didn't waver, so she finally accepted his answer and left the hangar.  
  
-----  
  
When Emma entered the lab, Brennan was in the throes of another fit. Adam was pressing him firmly back down against the table as his body arched and thrashed.  
  
Emma watched in sheer horror. Another seizure? This wasn't possible! Adam had had plenty of time to stabilize Brennan's condition. Then she saw the blood on the back of Brennan's hand - he must have torn out an IV.  
  
She instinctively rushed forward to help Shalimar keep Brennan still while Adam prepared a syringe of something. If they weren't able to steady him, his tossing could break off the needle before Adam was done giving him the injection.  
  
Somehow they managed, and Brennan quickly calmed down. But his breathing never eased, remaining harsh. It was then that Emma noticed the speckles of crimson on the inside of his oxygen mask. He gave a peculiar, alarming choke, and more blood splattered.  
  
"Oh god, Bren, don't do this," Emma cried. She couldn't believe he was coughing up blood. "Don't you dare do this to me!" She slipped the bloody mask from his face and caressed his cheek with the backs of her fingers, wiping away some blood before cupping his face in her palms. She had to use her power to separate him from this.  
  
Closing her eyes, she listened to his labored breathing. "It's okay," she said softly to him. "It's gonna be okay." Carefully, she focused her thoughts and slipped into the edges of his mind. If he needed so badly to shield himself and lock all else out, she'd allow it. Instead of manipulating or interfering, she gave him complete control of the barriers, and she reinforced his own mental strength. Whatever power he needed for control, he could pull from her.  
  
It was his choice now whether he wanted to fight what was happening to him or flee from it.  
  
Slowly, she drew back. "You can hide from the pain now, Bren," she whispered faintly. "You can lock it all out if you need to. But just don't cut yourself off from me, okay? Everything else, but not me. I know you think you'd be protecting me by severing our link, but I couldn't bear it. I love you... Just please keep hanging on and don't give up. Please, Bren..."  
  
Emma opened her eyes and fully left his mind. His breathing became less struggled but remained shallow. Only the faintest connection lingered between them now, but she held tightly to it. She once more pushed back the hair that seemed determined to fall across his forehead regardless of how many times she brushed it aside, and then she gently kissed his brow. "I need you, Brennan," she repeated.  
  
Adam gave her a sympathetic look before talking to Shalimar. "Get me a fresh oxygen mask. I'm going to try setting up another IV."  
  
Shalimar looked a bit shaky - but to her credit, she was managing to efficiently aid Adam. Emma tried to get a grip on her emotions in order to do the same. She tore her gaze away from Brennan and looked up. "How is he?" she asked quietly, not quite finding her voice, but Adam still heard her.  
  
"Fevered, dehydrated..." He paused, choosing his next words. "I'm going to run some cool saline which will help with that. It should keep his temperature from getting any higher."  
  
"He's coughing up blood, Adam," Emma stated very seriously, meeting his eyes for a moment. "Whatever Eckhart poisoned him with, it's killing him."  
  
Adam sighed wearily. "I'm waiting for some test results. Until I know exactly what I'm dealing with, I'm treating him symptomatically."  
  
"Brennan's going to fine, Emma," Shalimar added, trying to be optimistic and encouraging.  
  
Emma had momentarily forgotten her friend. She tried to nod. "Thanks," she mumbled automatically, knowing she should appreciate having Shalimar's support.  
  
Taking several deep breaths, Emma tried to calm her frazzled nerves. She felt completely spent, as though she might collapse at any moment. But she snapped back to being fully wired when Adam began to restrain Brennan's hand in order to attempt another IV.  
  
Emma squeezed her eyes tightly closed, choking back her protests. After what Brennan had been through, how could they possibly tie him down? But she knew it was necessary, and it broke her heart.  
  
"It's for his own good, Emma," Adam told her, seeing her tortured expression. "I can't have him ripping out another IV. If he seizes again, it will prevent him from injuring himself."  
  
She managed a small nod. She knew... she'd worked with Adam enough to know. Restraints were standard procedure if a patient was having fits. But his last words still sparked a strong emotion as she accidentally read him. Removing all potentially dangerous objects from a medical lab wasn't practical, so this was also Adam's way of putting Brennan under suicide watch.  
  
Emma hated this. Brennan didn't still want to die. She wouldn't let him want to! She touched his bandaged wrist before moving her fingers to the restraint, but she didn't unfasten it. Shalimar wrapped an arm around her, and Emma turned into the embrace, welcoming her friend's hug.  
  
Adam didn't comment further, and he finished hooking up the new IV before eventually speaking again. "It's no use trying to bring him around, so I'm going to fully sedate him. Hopefully the Messiah Strand will buy us some time once Brennan's completely under. But since he won't be able to tell me what Mason infected him with... Emma, I'll need you to recall everything you know about--"  
  
"I thought Brennan was the first," she said quickly, pulling away from Shalimar and cutting Adam off. "Eckhart didn't do this to anybody else."  
  
"I don't understand," Adam replied, not catching her meaning.  
  
Emma glared suspiciously at him, taking a step back. "Maybe you should tell me what's wrong with Brennan." She didn't know if it was for defense or as a threat, but she wound up a psionic tesla coil in her hands, the illusion of electricity feeling completely natural to her this time. "No more games."  
  
"Emma, what the hell is the matter with you?" Shalimar snapped at her, wondering if they should have been as concerned about her as they were for Brennan. "Adam is trying to help."  
  
"This experiment!" Emma proclaimed. "If Brennan is patient zero, how do you know about it, Adam? You called the strand 'Messiah.' You called it by name!"  
  
"If you let me, I'll explain," Adam said calmly, waiting for Emma to lower her hands.  
  
Eventually, she did drop the mirage, her artificial sparks disappearing. But she let it go out of exhaustion, not trust. "I want to know what's going on, Adam. I want to know everything."  
  
"Alright," he agreed. "The reason I know what it's called is that I named it." He took a deep breath. "I'm the one who created the Messiah Strand."  
  
-----  
  
TO BE CONCLUDED...  
  
I know, not much of a cliffhanger since you all had that figured out since chapter six, but it seemed like a good place for me to take a little break. The rest should be posted in about a week.  
  
And as always, Lanfear was my incredible beta for this chapter, and I would have drowned in typos and poorly worded sentences without her. 


	40. Revelations

I know I delayed too long in posting this part. I was hoping to find the time and the proper frame of mind to edit it further. However, I finally decided that you probably aren't expecting perfection from me and would rather just have it now. So here it is, not trimmed down nearly as much as it should be (the whole story needs to lose about 40,000 words of meandering), and Jesse's parts in this chapter are only setup for Part Two, and this is melancholy more than loud. But since you all know a second part had been planned, and surely have an idea of it in your minds, I've left this as what it was meant to be, as something other than a climactic end, because it is not truly the end. One door closes with this, but I prefer to leave the fandom with another one open.  
  
Also, this chapter goes out to Audrey. The longest chapter for the person who sent me the longest feedback. It just seemed fitting.  
  
-----  
  
-----  
  
Adam had invented the strand? That couldn't be true... and yet he'd just confessed to it.  
  
"What?" Emma gasped in stunned disbelief. This had to be some kind of sick, twisted, and horribly inappropriate joke. Except nobody was laughing, and Adam was far from smiling. She stepped backward in order to place herself protectively between Adam and Brennan. She felt devastated... betrayed.  
  
Everything that had happened, all that had been done to Brennan, it was all because of Adam. "Why would you do this?" she asked, her voice small and afraid. "How could you do this?"  
  
"He didn't," Shalimar said defensively. She wouldn't believe that Adam could ever hurt any of them. He was Adam - he was their guardian. "Tell her you didn't do this to Brennan."  
  
"I had no knowledge of Mason's actions," Adam assured them. "Until tonight, I swear to you, I did not know."  
  
Emma could only stare at him, too nervous to use her power properly. She wanted to read him and find out if he was lying, but she was frightened. A possible betrayal from Adam truly scared her, as did his constant use of Eckhart's first name. They'd once been friends. And Eckhart had obviously said something to Brennan to make him doubt Adam. He'd asked her if she trusted Adam, really trusted him with her life. She'd dismissed it as paranoia, but now... Why hadn't she asked him the reason for his worry - the real reason? Something had to have triggered the distrust. Was there more than he'd let on?  
  
Before her shock could flare into anger, Emma decided she might need to listen to Adam's side of all this. What if he did have a logical explanation for his involvement? It would be best to hear it before she let her emotions get even more out of control. If she became too upset, her power would be like a loaded gun. And if he didn't talk faster, she thought she might kill him.  
  
"Emma, if you do anything to Adam, you'll regret it," Shalimar stated firmly, seeing the intense gaze she had locked on him. "He's the only one who can help Brennan."  
  
That approached worked and Emma dropped her focus to the floor, closing her eyes and squelching any bad thoughts before she could project them.  
  
"That's better." Shalimar crossed her arms over her chest. "Now, Adam, I assume there's more you wanted to say."  
  
He nodded. "I did create the strand, but I had no part in what was done to Brennan. I thought I'd destroyed all my research years ago."  
  
Emma trained her eyes back on Adam, but she held her power in check. "What else do you know? What's going to happen to Brennan?"  
  
"He's going to die." This time it was Jesse who spoke from the doorway as he entered the lab. "I checked everything, and we're not broadcasting any signals. Eckhart really did just let us go. Why would he do that without any demented twists? Which makes me think he merely finds it funny to let us go home and then watch Brennan die anyway. Tell me I'm not right."  
  
Letting them take their ill teammate home could also be viewed as a sign of compassion, except they all knew better. Eckhart had purposefully done this to him, and there'd been no trace of compassion in that. He'd had the chance to take all of Mutant X captive, but this hurt more. Being safe yet being helpless was worse.  
  
The furrow of Adam's brow deepened. "Let me finish some more tests and try to stabilize Brennan," he replied. "Then perhaps I should start at the beginning."  
  
-----  
  
"I told you they never laid a hand on me," Emma mumbled as Adam finished examining her. Other than some slight bruising, she was physically fine. She stared down at the floor as if ashamed to have come through this unscathed while Brennan had been treated so brutally. "Nobody touched me."  
  
Jesse took her hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze, clearly wanting to say something to comfort her but uncertain as to what. She was in shock, on the verge of breaking into tears once more. She'd been withdrawn the entire time Adam had attempted questioning her.  
  
"Jess, you next." Adam motioned for him to take Emma's seat, watching as his fingers became a little tighter around hers again for an instant before releasing her hand. "I'd like to check your back."  
  
As the two moved to comply, the computer beeped in signal that the analysis of Brennan's blood sample was complete. "Go," Jesse urged. "I'm alright."  
  
Needing no further encouragement, Adam quickly went to check the results. Although if Brennan truly had been given the Messiah Strand but was now falling ill, he knew there was only one thing that would explain it. Adam told himself that it was impossible, yet if the strand existed...  
  
He prayed his suspicions were wrong, but the tests showed proof of what he'd already known. This was all part of the game. Mason could have ended things back on that roof, yet a simple victory wasn't enough. Their relationship had always been about proving themselves better than the other.  
  
This was therefore a war of wit and cunning, of skill, and of the mind. Mason needed him to be forced into a willing surrender. Adam's triumph years ago would be his undoing now.  
  
"Adam, what is it?" Shalimar eventually asked after an interminable silence.  
  
It was a rather long story he wasn't inclined to relive. He quickly shook away the memories. "You've all seen this twice before," he told them, "in a manner of speaking."  
  
"How do you mean?" Jesse inquired. "You've never mentioned anything like this before."  
  
"Not the strand," Adam corrected, "the virus."  
  
-----  
  
Emma followed more closely at his heels than his own shadow as Adam worked. She had assisted him in the lab on numerous occasions, so he knew she could comprehend his actions without him being forced to explain them. In fact, she likely knew too much. He saw her nervous glances when he finally began giving Brennan drugs to help control the pain, opting to hook up a steady supply of morphine.  
  
This was the first time he'd decided to use a continuous dose rather than injections. None of his kids had ever been in this situation before, and that surely would concern them. Giving the painkiller in this fashion could just mean Adam wanted the drug to enter Brennan's system slowly, but it held the implication that Adam was expecting him to remain in a great deal of pain for an extended period of time. He said nothing to alleviate those fears, because they were unfortunately more than justified.  
  
Other than trying to control the pain, Adam could only administer more sedatives - taking Brennan from being lightly under to just short of inducing a coma - and also antibiotics to boost his immune system. He glanced at Emma as she put her face in her hands. Did she suspect Brennan would never wake up again?  
  
When he stopped working, Shalimar looked troubled. "That's it?" With Brennan's symptoms, they all knew antibiotics wouldn't be enough. She cast a furtive glance at Jesse, and Adam wondered if she was thinking he'd been right about this. Adam couldn't do anything that would prevent their friend from dying.  
  
"Why don't you all sit down for a minute," Adam requested. The three of them perched themselves on the edge of one of the other tables in the room while Adam took the only chair. He hesitated.  
  
"I was working with genetic engineering for quite a few years before New Mutants and Genomex," Adam finally began. "Ferals, Moleculars, Psionics, and Elementals came only after several other attempts at treating various problems by means of gene therapy and manipulation.  
  
"One of those attempts was the Messiah Strand. I suppose you could call it similar to another type of mutation, only this was intentional. It was designed to bind with the DNA and give unimaginable regenerative abilities. In theory, it would restore perfect health." He paused briefly there before continuing. "I chose to overlook several obvious problems."  
  
"Like what?" Shalimar wanted to know.  
  
He took a fairly deep breath and cleared his throat. "Like the fact that if I was able to stabilize the strand, this result would become permanent. It would essentially stop the aging process." His brow furrowed more deeply as he frowned. "I'd discovered the key to immortality."  
  
"How was that a bad thing?" Shalimar leaned forward like a child eager to discover what happened next.  
  
Jesse, however, was predictably apprehensive of where this was leading, his mind already a step ahead. "He'd just given himself the ability to play God, Shal."  
  
"You have to understand the benefits," Adam interrupted. "The Messiah Strand would be a cure for anything - imagine a world without cancer or AIDS..."  
  
"Now imagine this in the wrong hands," Jesse countered. "Or imagine it available to everyone. Nobody would say no to being young forever."  
  
"But think of the advances we'd have," Shalimar argued. "Think what could have been accomplished if Einstein had lived longer. Or Edison, or Mozart. Or John Lennon."  
  
Jesse was still shaking his head in disagreement. "What if everybody could live forever? I'm not saying it wouldn't be amazing to be able to have the time to read every book in an entire library, or to essentially be able to do everything, I suppose. But the world is already overpopulated. We'd exhaust all our resources, and..."  
  
"What about sick children?" Emma finally spoke, cutting off Jesse. "Do you save their lives if it means they'll never grow up? Either way, they'd never grow up."  
  
Adam sighed. "You lot are far more precocious than I was at your age."  
  
Emma's next question promptly ended the debate. "So is Brennan going to die?" She paused, and Adam wondered if she meant now or ever. "And where have we seen this twice before?"  
  
Adam nodded. "Before we got sidetracked, I was getting to that part." He was tempted to get up and pace, but he remained stiffly seated. "Back then, I think you're already aware, all of my research was either academically or governmentally funded?"  
  
Shalimar and Jesse nodded.  
  
"I worked along side Mason Eckhart in those days," he continued, knowing they knew not much more than that, "and it came to my attention that my research was a subject of much interest. Like Jesse pointed out, if in the wrong hands, Messiah could conceivably shift world powers."  
  
"So the government got involved," concluded Jesse.  
  
"Correct. They commissioned Mason to develop a counteragent. It was a project known strictly as LCFR-216. Beyond that, it was classified, as my work also became. It wasn't until I'd nearly completed the ground work for the strand that I became aware of exactly what 216--"  
  
Jesse suddenly made an amused noise that was practically a snort. "Sorry," he said quickly. "The whole project code thing, I just got that."  
  
Shalimar and Emma both gave him strange looks.  
  
"As it turned out," Adam resumed, "a counteragent was impossible, so they were developing a virus that would, in laymen's terms, strip the DNA of the Messiah Strand. It was upon discovering this that I claimed a mistake in my theory and then destroyed all my research. Or so I thought."  
  
"But you said the Messiah Strand was like a mutancy," Shalimar responded in confusion. "You can't strip that away. It's impossible."  
  
"That's what we've been through twice," Emma realized. "First with the Russians and then..."  
  
"Richard's serum," Shalimar finished for her, her eyes suddenly damp.  
  
"So then great, right?" Jesse said, a bit of hope returning to his grim expression. "Adam, you were able to reverse that both times. I mean, Brennan and Shal are both still here after all."  
  
"I wouldn't be if Richard hadn't died," Shalimar replied quietly.  
  
Jesse had the sense to look apologetic for not thinking before he spoke.  
  
"And this is different, isn't it?" Emma asked Adam. "What we've seen was where trying to strip powers would unintentionally cause severe side effects. But you called this 216 project a virus. There's no way to reverse a mutancy, so it's meant to kill carriers of the Messiah Strand, isn't it? That's why you destroyed your research, wasn't it, Adam, because you'd inadvertently caused the necessity for the creation of something designed to end life, the opposite of what you sought to achieve?"  
  
"Yes, what Brennan's been infected with is considerably more..." he struggled over choosing the right words, "ruthless in its approach than what we've previously encountered. In order to destroy the strand, it will tear Brennan apart internally. And without the strand, he won't survive."  
  
Jesse wrapped his arm around Emma who'd started trembling. "Is there a cure?" he asked.  
  
Adam took a long time to answer. "No."  
  
"But you can find one," Shalimar insisted. "You can still use our previous experiences to find one."  
  
It didn't work like that. This was entirely different and they all knew it, but nobody mentioned that. And there was always a chance Adam would discover a solution despite likely needing to start from scratch.  
  
"I'll try." Adam then stood. "I should get to work. And you all look ready to drop, so I suggest you go to bed and try to get some sleep."  
  
"I'd rather stay here," Emma objected despite knowing it wasn't a request.  
  
Adam walked over to a cabinet and, upon returning, handed Emma a small cup with several pills in it. "Since you've been fighting off a cold, I'd like for you to at least take some vitamins. There should be orange juice in the kitchen refrigerator."  
  
"I don't want any orange juice," Emma said stubbornly.  
  
Shalimar hopped off the edge of the table where she'd been sitting. "Come on, I'll go with you." She gave Adam a look that said she'd handle it. Emma reluctantly went with her.  
  
Once they were gone, Jesse gave Adam a suspicious look. "You said you'd like for her to take some vitamins, but you never said that's what you gave her. How long is she going to be out?"  
  
Adam smiled at the intuitive young man. "Several hours at least. We're all highly stressed, and that has to be negatively affecting her. Right now, rest is the best thing for her. You might want to go help Shalimar get her to bed before she falls asleep."  
  
"Yeah, okay." He started to follow the girls to the kitchen but then looked back to Adam once more. "If Shal and I head to bed also, you'll wake us if there's anything..."  
  
Adam nodded. "I will."  
  
"Okay," Jesse said again before going.  
  
Watching him leave, Adam wondered if he'd done the right thing by lying to his kids. There was a cure for 216, but returning Brennan to Mason was the only way to get it.  
  
Brennan was only dying because the Messiah Strand was not yet at full strength. If it were allowed to become stable, not even the virus that had been created to stop it would be enough to kill him.  
  
That realization, made years ago, had been what caused Adam to destroy his research.  
  
-----  
  
Shalimar pulled the blanket up over Emma again as Jesse helped tuck her in for the second time. "I think she's finally asleep," she commented.  
  
Taking no chances on Emma attempting to go back to Brennan, Jesse tucked the edges of her sheet under the mattress. She'd be more comfortable in her bed than passed out in the lab. "Alright, that ought to hold her for a few seconds. Snug as a bug." If she really wanted to get up, she still could easily. But Jesse wanted that to be after she slept off Adam's pills.  
  
Shalimar stroked Emma's hair as she stirred slightly. "It must have been horrible for her," she remarked.  
  
"Do you think Bren will recover?" Jesse asked as she sat on the floor and leaned against the side of the bed.  
  
"Sure. Adam's a genius, right?" She didn't sound as confident as she wanted to. She didn't feel it either. "He'll find a way to stop the virus."  
  
Jesse sat down as well. "I didn't mean that. I meant if Adam does save him." He paused, looking to be sure Emma was really asleep. "Eckhart tortured him, Shal."  
  
"I know..."  
  
"I don't think I could handle it," Jesse added. "If it had been me--"  
  
"It wasn't you!" she suddenly snapped at him. "Don't say that, Jess."  
  
"Why not? It could have been me. Eckhart had me also." He'd messed up and allowed himself to be captured.  
  
She got up and turned her back to him. "Because I don't know what I'd do if it had been you." He stood as well and she spun and wrapped him in her arms. Jesse had always been incredibly sensitive. "I can't bear the thought of anyone hurting you. I'm glad it wasn't you."  
  
"I won't say it again," he apologized, wincing from her grip but letting her rest her head on his shoulder. "I know I'm not as strong as Brennan is. He'll get through this and be fine."  
  
She lifted her head. "Jesse, I wasn't--"  
  
"It's okay," he quickly assured her. "I like that you watch out for me. I know I don't always handle things as well as the rest of you. Like when I saw that computer screen, I lost it. Those things were done to Brennan. It's never supposed to be somebody you know, that's not supposed to happen... But you kept your head and got us out of there. I needed you today."  
  
She hugged him even more tightly, oblivious to the spike of pain which shot through his back at her action. "I wasn't under control back there either," she confessed. "And I'm not glad it wasn't you because I think you're weak, Jess. I'm grateful it was Brennan and not you because I love you more. It's selfish and terrible, but you matter more. Oh god, what if Brennan dies now and I said that? I didn't want this to happen to Bren either. I didn't mean it."  
  
Jesse rubbed her back, seeing that she needed to be comforted and reassured as much as he did. Although it hurt to have her backtracking so quickly to erase her words. Was it really so terrible if she prefer something bad happen to Brennan rather than him? He supposed it was and sighed deeply. "I know you didn't. It's okay."  
  
-----  
  
After Shalimar decided to sit with Emma for a while, Jesse finally excused himself and made it to his room.  
  
Alone at last, he dropped the façade it had taken all his strength to hold, and he let the pain be reflected in his expression. He slowly made his way to the bathroom and leaned against the edge of the sink, then he opened the medicine cabinet and grabbed the bottle of aspirin. Popping off the lid, he shook two pills into his palm. He dumped them into his mouth and turned on the sink, cupping water in his hands and washing down the painkillers.  
  
He waited for the drug to take effect, needing the twinges in his back to stop. It hurt strongly enough for him to be tempted to go to Adam about it. Except he couldn't do that. Jesse couldn't distract him with his minor pains while he needed to focus on Brennan.  
  
A pang of jealousy surfaced, and he let it linger a minute before he pushed it aside. So what if everybody had shown concern for him like that of family. So what if Shalimar didn't favor Jesse over him and Emma decided to fall in love with him. And so what if Brennan had easily gained the respect Jesse had been trying to earn for years and they all knew he'd lead Mutant X if anything were ever to happen to Adam. So what if in Adam's eyes Brennan was everything Jesse couldn't quite be. So what...  
  
He wouldn't envy Brennan the position he was in now. He wouldn't covet the pain just to have Adam look at him with the same kind of pride, Shal concern, and Emma affection. He wasn't that petty. It was just easier to be upset, to dwell on the others' reactions instead of dealing with his own feelings. They'd all let Brennan in. Jesse had let down his walls and allowed himself to care about the ex-criminal. He was like a brother to Jesse now, and how dare he even get close to dying and hurting Jesse like that!  
  
Brennan was the only guy friend that Jesse had. How sad was that? He knew a few other people, of course; it was just hard for him to make real, lasting friendships with anyone. Other mutants always ended up in the underground and being moved away, and with normal people, he was afraid of being a freak. So he hadn't managed to accomplish any good foundations for friendships lately.  
  
So he'd be jealous, and he would be mad, and he'd focus on anything but how it would really feel for him to lose Brennan. "You have everything I've ever wanted, Bren," he spoke silently. "Don't be an idiot and give it all up by dying, or I'll never forgive you."  
  
Carefully, he shrugged out of his jacket, wincing at the pain caused by rotating his shoulders. He dropped it to the floor and then took a moment to catch his breath. He had taken a bullet, and he'd been scolded like a thoughtless child for his actions.  
  
He quickly told himself that was quite enough of his little pity party for himself. He needed to snap out of his bad mood, ignore his jumbled emotions, fix his back, and then go to bed. If he could somehow let his mind go blank of distracting thoughts, he'd be fine. But he couldn't stop thinking about everything.  
  
Bitterly, he peeled off his bloodstained shirt, dragging a streak of red across his skin. He stared at the ruined material, but it didn't really surprise him. He'd felt the pain when the wound had reopened, felt the wetness as it slowly but surely seeped through the bandage.  
  
But he hadn't complained. He never complained.  
  
He hissed through gritted teeth as he removed the bandage next, then wet a washcloth in order to wipe away the blood. The task was difficult with the wound being at his back, but he didn't need any help.  
  
He was the exact same person he always had been and always would be. He suffered in silence and was always fine in the end. Nobody ever needed to worry about him. They just took for granted that he was there and was fine.  
  
When he finished cleaning the area of blood smears, he tossed the cloth into the sink along with his shirt, making a mental note to throw them out later. His jacket could probably stand to be trashed as well unless he wanted to spend hours washing the lining. He didn't bother with re- bandaging the wound; he didn't have the energy.  
  
He sighed wearily. Adam had said they would talk later. But Jesse knew they wouldn't. Laters were strange, indiscriminate moments of time that never actually came. All that existed was the past and the now. And now, they would deal with Brennan, and all of Jesse's problems would become the past. Then eventually, Adam would forget all about Jesse's promised later.  
  
There was guilt at his feelings, because Jesse knew his silly emotions weren't warranted. He didn't even know why he wanted to finish his argument with Adam. It was so utterly unimportant in comparison to everything else.  
  
That was a heavy weight in itself - the everything else. He still carried traces of memory Emma had accidentally given him. Such anguish like no one should ever know.  
  
Jesse removed the lid from the pills once more and dumped out a small handful. He glanced at the label that informed him not to exceed 12 pills in 24 hours. He took the full dozen, tossing them into his mouth and attempting to force them back without water. He succeeded in swallowing several of them dry, determined not to use his sink since it was currently coated in blood, but he eventually gave up and splattered himself slightly with red water in order to wash down the remaining pills.  
  
Tired and a bit dizzy, Jesse stumbled his way to his bed and barely managed to collapse across it before passing out, the last thought on his mind being that one of his best friends was likely going to die.  
  
-----  
  
A gentle pounding on his door roused Jesse, and he groaned before shoving himself up.  
  
Shalimar waited for him to open the door, and then she studied him when he did so. He was wearing just his jeans. "Are you okay?" she asked.  
  
"I'm fine," he answered automatically, not surprised when she accepted his answer.  
  
"Are you going to invite me in?" She gave him an expectant look.  
  
"Now's not the best time. I was sleeping." Jesse then sighed, knowing he couldn't actually turn her away. "Yeah, just hang on a minute."  
  
He closed the door, leaving her in the hall, and quickly rushed to splash some water around his sink in an attempt to clean away the blood. He shoved his shirt, jacket, and wash cloth into the wastebasket. Then he left his bathroom and pulled on a fresh shirt before letting Shalimar in.  
  
She stood silently in his room for a few minutes before Jesse realized her stare was glued to his bed. He cursed his stupidity at not taking care of that before letting her in. He was fairly certain he'd passed out while lying on his stomach, yet his sheets were still streaked with his blood.  
  
Shalimar was right - he did have a tendency to roll over when he slept in any position other than on his back. He sighed and ran a hand through his tousled hair. "Did you need something, Shal?"  
  
"I didn't feel much like sleeping." She studied Jesse for a minute. "Do you want some help with your back?"  
  
Shrugging, he replied, "Yeah sure."  
  
She followed him into his bathroom, and he was glad he'd done a quick clean- up job on the sink, although he noticed the container of painkillers was still in clear sight on the counter. He scooped it up, shook a couple pills into his hand, and then handed it to Shalimar who replaced the cap and returned it to the medicine cabinet. He turned on the sink and filled his hand with water to help him swallow the pills, then he washed his face.  
  
He was somewhat surprised that Shalimar hadn't commented on the half-empty container. She'd been with him when he'd bought it only a week or so ago. He hadn't been injured at all between then and when he'd been shot, making it fairly obvious that he should by no means have already used so many of the painkillers. But he'd gotten so good at always being fine that nobody even noticed the problems that he occasionally let slip by in plain sight.  
  
Luckily for Jesse, his back had finally stopped bleeding, so they were able to get by with just the supplies he kept in the cabinet under the sink.  
  
Shalimar cleaned the area some before taping fresh gauze over the wound. Jesse leaned on the counter for support but never complained. "Does this hurt?" she asked anyway.  
  
"No," he lied easily, not wanting to worry her. "I'm fine, Shal. Thanks for bandaging me up." She applied the final piece of tape, and with the task finished, Jesse slipped back into his shirt then gave her a smile. "Good as new."  
  
"You're sure?"  
  
Maybe she knew him too well. But he shrugged the question off. "Yeah. Why don't you try to get a couple more hours of sleep? We could both probably use it."  
  
"Alright," she agreed in resignation, concluding that he wanted to be by himself. "Good night, Jesse."  
  
"Good night, Shal," he echoed before closing his door and locking it as she headed back to her own room.  
  
Jesse returned to bed and lay awake for several hours, unable to sleep. He felt like crying - about Brennan, about the conversation he wanted to finish with Adam, about being a freak, about not having a normal life and having no plans for one either, about not having any friends outside of Mutant X... about everything. He just wanted to cry for no reason and for every reason. It had been far too long since he'd gotten stuff out of his system.  
  
And why shouldn't he cry? This whole situation deeply affected him. With the addition of Emma and Brennan to the team, Jesse felt for the first time in his life as though he had a complete family. Now, that feeling was being taken away from him.  
  
He absently traced his fingers across the center of his chest, renewing the memory of what Emma had made him feel instead of letting it slip away like a bad dream. For it wasn't a dream. Jesse wished it had been, but it was all too real. Even if Adam saved his life, he knew Brennan would never be quite the same. How could he possibly be after that?  
  
Jesse shifted uncomfortably. He decided he did indeed want it to all go away. He wished Emma had never tried to contact him. It wasn't fair. None of this was right, and he wanted to cry.  
  
But Jesse knew one thing would always lead to another if he starting crying, and he needed to sleep more than he needed to lie awake the rest of the night silently sobbing over things that couldn't be changed.  
  
His back still ached, and he got up in order to take two more painkillers. Then he wondered why he was taking them. He'd never turned to drugs before, certainly never abused them... but it didn't matter, they weren't helping. He didn't feel like they were doing anything at all.  
  
Placing the container back on the shelf and closing the medicine cabinet, Jesse told himself he wasn't going to take any more. If he still felt like he needed something in the morning, he'd go talk to Adam.  
  
-----  
  
In the solitude of his lab, Adam sat down to carefully weigh his options. The situation only had three possible outcomes, none of them solutions.  
  
Option one was to keep Brennan at Sanctuary and continue the attempt to find a cure for the virus, despite having no luck thus far. It was theoretically possible to accomplish the task, however unlikely. Yet even with complete success, the healing effects of the strand would be forfeit as it would continue to degrade until it broke down fully. Brennan would first be faced with the prolonged period of withdrawal, and then he would need to recover from his injuries without aid.  
  
He would be off the Mutant X team, there was no doubt of that. It would likely take several extensive surgeries on his knee and years of intense physical therapy for him to be able to walk normally again, and even then field missions would be out of the question. His eyesight might also never return. He would only be a burden to them, though the others would never admit it, never accept that he wouldn't fully recover, and never allow Adam to replace him.  
  
But Adam knew the need for a replacement would be strong. His team was formed to function as just that - a team. And without originally realizing it, he'd designed a team that required an Elemental. Without Brennan, the others would be unable to do their job properly. They'd grown to depend on him. The team needed that forth member.  
  
And Adam couldn't rely on Brennan being emotionally stable either. What if he survived the virus only to commit suicide later due to the frustrations of what was done to him combined with being both blind and primarily bed- ridden for an indefinite amount of time? That would surely shatter the rest of the team.  
  
The worst possible thing would be to save him now and then have him lost later.  
  
Adam needed to decide what mattered more to him - his team, or the individual members?  
  
The second option was to use the Messiah Strand. This was what Eckhart was counting on. He'd let them go to prove a point. It was the same ultimatum Adam had been faced with back on that roof. In order to stop Brennan's suffering and save his life, Adam needed to return him to Mason. And now the act would be of his own volition. He would deliver Brennan into the clutches of the GSA of his own free will. And due to his not being able to let Brennan die, Eckhart would have all he needed to inevitably win this battle... and also this war.  
  
Returning to Mason for help also meant that Brennan would be further tortured. In addiction, with the strand fully stable and being an electric Elemental, Brennan would be the most powerful person alive and also the Achilles' heal to any resistance brought up by Mutant X. And he would be in Eckhart's possession. And Eckhart would have all the research he needed to repeat the process.  
  
That could not be allowed at any cost. Mason was right; Adam needed to be able to make sacrifices for the greater good.  
  
Which led to option three, the unthinkable option. Do nothing, and let Brennan die. Then instead of being a hindrance, a burden to the team, or a victim who had the misfortune of surviving, he would become a martyr. With his death, the others would rally together united against Eckhart. They would allow a new member to the team if it meant they'd be able to avenge Brennan's loss. They'd find renewed strength for that purpose.  
  
Finally deciding to do what Mason thought him incapable of, Adam drew another blood sample and ran a last test. The Messiah Strand was almost fully broken down. Brennan was fighting the virus on his own now.  
  
Out of sympathy for his plight, Adam slightly increased Brennan's morphine. He doubted the young man was capable of feeling pain while so deeply unconscious, but there was always the remote chance, and Brennan's body still held a slight trace of tension that belied thoughts of his sleep being peaceful.  
  
He was slowly bleeding to death internally as 216 ripped his body apart. After a while, he wouldn't be able to breathe due to the amount of blood in his lungs. Adam silently prayed that the young man's heart would give out, as had nearly happened with the Russian Pushka, before things progressed that far.  
  
He tenderly laid his hand on Brennan's fevered forehead. His temperature was spiking dangerously high. Adam lifted his hand and watched his team member's labored breathing. He shouldn't be forced to die like this.  
  
The vital signs displayed on the monitors were still fairly strong considering. Adam shook his head with bittersweet affection. Why did Brennan always have to be so damn stubborn? He was hanging on fiercely to a losing battle.  
  
Adam subconsciously moved his hand back to the controls for Brennan's morphine, but he stopped himself from increasing it further. Any higher an amount and Adam would be in danger of overdosing him.  
  
Fetching his chair, Adam sat at Brennan's bedside. A feeling of intense guilt began to overwhelm him at his inaction. Brennan was struggling, suffering, and he did nothing. It could take many hours yet for him to die.  
  
The thought crossed Adam's mind that it would be better for Brennan if he did overdose him. It was a terrible thought, but wasn't it more unethical of him to merely sit and watch as the young man slowly died?  
  
The thought was absurd. He had been prepared to discover that Brennan was dead when they attempted to rescue Emma; he had never considered that he would end up faced with needing to kill the eldest member of his team himself.  
  
He couldn't do it.  
  
Yet it was the only logical, only ethical... only merciful... thing to do.  
  
He silently thanked God that it wasn't one of the others lying there. Emma, Jesse, and Shalimar hadn't even reached their 30th birthdays yet. They were still just children in his eyes. Adam knew he'd surely lose his mind if it were one of them. It was far more preferable to lose the oldest member of his team than the youngest.  
  
He told himself that, in this type of situation, euthanasia was acceptable. Yet his hand still shook as he turned Brennan's morphine up to where the drug would enter his system at a lethal level.  
  
Something inside him screamed that the action was the wrong one. He could have at least tried flooding Brennan's system with stimulants first - it might have been possible to wake him. Consciousness would have been accompanied by extreme pain, but it would have given the others a chance to be with Brennan before the end. They could have said goodbye.  
  
And yet, if he saw their grief-stricken faces, he knew he wouldn't have been able to go through with it. He would have delivered Brennan to Mason in order to save his life at any cost, and it would have been their downfall.  
  
No, it was better as it was. Brennan's death would be fairly swift, and it would happen while the others were all sleeping. This was the right choice.  
  
He wasn't allowing Brennan to die slowly and painfully. Taking his life this way was showing kindness. It was compassion.  
  
It was murder.  
  
Adam flicked off all the monitoring equipment. Then he quickly reached to release the restraints from Brennan's wrists, as if doing so made his decision less offensive. Brennan wouldn't be allowed to die with his hands bound.  
  
As he finished removing the straps, Adam noticed the faint tan line around Brennan's finger. He closed his eyes tightly. Why did it suddenly feel like he'd just killed his own son?  
  
He held Brennan's hand firmly in his, the other moving to softly stroke Brennan's hair. He considered removing the oxygen mask but decided to leave it in case it might help ease these final moments for him. Morphine intoxication would stop his breathing regardless, but Adam wanted this to happen gently.  
  
"It's okay," Adam said quietly, his fingers tracing the edge of the mask. It might actually be easier, happen faster, if he were to remove it. Yet, despite what he was doing, taking off the mask seemed cruel. "Just rest now, Brennan. Everything will be fine. You're home."  
  
He considered going to get a cool cloth to place on Brennan's forehead to relieve some of the heat from the fever, but he decided instead not to leave the young man's side.  
  
It was only a moment later that Brennan quit breathing.  
  
-----  
  
Emma felt her mattress dip as he lay down beside her. "Go back to sleep, Em," he said softly. "You're supposed to be resting, not searching for me."  
  
She ignored him as he tenderly brushed her hair back from her face and carefully tucked it behind her ear. She refused to roll over and look at him. "I am asleep, Bren. This isn't real; you're just a dream."  
  
He lightly kissed her shoulder, and his breath tickled even through her shirt as he laughed. "Well, I suppose that's alright so long as it's your dream." She could hear the grin in his voice, but instead of making her happy, it upset her.  
  
"Don't tease me right now. It isn't funny." She hated to be angry with him, yet she couldn't help it.  
  
"I'm sorry," he apologized, rubbing her arm to comfort her.  
  
"What are you sorry for?" she snapped. "I'm the one who's sleeping while you're--"  
  
She cut herself off, starting to get up from the bed, but he quickly grabbed her wrist. "Don't," he pleaded. He didn't want her to be hurt. "Don't wake up yet, Em."  
  
She made the mistake of turning her face to look at him, and then she couldn't look away. "I should be with you," she told him, feeling herself tremble and knowing she was about to start crying.  
  
Pulling her gently back down, he wrapped his arm around her and held her. "You are with me." He shifted their positions so that she was resting more securely against him. "But this once, let me be the one to comfort you, okay?"  
  
His warmth felt good pressed to her back, and she snuggled a bit closer. Then she did cry. "I really do love you, you know."  
  
He nodded before placing his head back down on her pillows. "Yeah, I know." He shifted and brushed away her tears before sliding his arm around her waist once again. "I think you're the first person to ever say that and not leave afterward." Perhaps she was the first to actually mean it at all.  
  
"I could never leave you..." She buried her face in the material of her pillowcase. "I can't lose you, Brennan," she added quietly.  
  
"The choice has been taken out of my hands." But he supposed it was better this way. It wasn't a decision he wanted. If he had no say, it was easier to find peace. Without choice, there was no need to fight any longer. However, he wondered if he should tell her he would have chosen her, that he didn't want to leave her, didn't want to die. Would it be better that she know the truth, that he wasn't abandoning her willing, or did she love him so much she would rather believe that he still longed to let this world go, that he wanted this?  
  
He said neither. This moment was all they had, and he preferred it spent in quiet solace rather than bitter weeping. He absently trailed his fingers back and forth along the bare skin between her waistband and the edge of her crumpled shirt. "The day we met, Emma, you saved my life - you saved me. I have never once regretted any of the decisions I made because of having met you. I don't regret any of it."  
  
The final reassurances of a man about to die. Emma tensed at his words. How could he say that to her now and actually believe it? She was the reason this was happening - because he'd walked the path she'd chosen. She slipped her hand down into his and intertwined their fingers. "How much time do we have until..."  
  
"Not long," he replied carefully. He didn't want her to start crying again. He only wanted to hold her.  
  
They laid together in silence for a minute.  
  
"Does it hurt?" Emma eventually asked.  
  
She felt the rise and fall of his chest as he sighed almost contentedly. "No."  
  
That was good. She was glad he wasn't in any pain. She wrapped both her hands around his, subconsciously playing with his fingers. "I love you," she repeated.  
  
He propped himself up on his free elbow and smiled at her. Whatever had happened between them the day they met, he was grateful. "I love you too, Emma." It was said too late, but at least he'd finally confessed it.  
  
Even with it ending this way, Brennan wasn't sorry he'd chosen to join Mutant X. He thought he surely should have been resentful or angry, but there was only acceptance. He hadn't had such a very bad life. He felt his tears slowly wet his face as he silently cried along with Emma.  
  
Despite the past week, he decided it had been worth it. His mother had once told him he could judge the value of his life by whom his friends were. He held Emma more tightly in his arms. He finally liked who he was. He was happy.  
  
Eventually, after what seemed all too short a moment, he slipped his hand from hers, then he placed a final kiss in her hair. "You're the most beautiful girl in the world, Em," he said softly. "You're gonna be okay... Just go back to sleep now."  
  
She obediently closed her eyes, and then her mattress shifted once more and his touch was gone.  
  
-----  
  
Emma instantly snapped awake, tangled in her sheets. When she rolled over, she found her bed was empty, and she was alone in her room. "Bren, no..." she whimpered, quickly clutching for him and finding only thin air in her grasp.  
  
The dream had dissipated back into reality, and she was alone inside her mind, hearing none of his thoughts. Sitting up, she hugged her pillow to her chest and started sobbing.  
  
-----  
  
Adam took a deep, shuddering breath as he shifted the position of his fingers on Brennan's neck once more and there was still no trace of a pulse. He'd done the unthinkable. He'd chosen to take the life of one of his own.  
  
This was more than merely the choice, however. He'd gone through with the decision, acted upon it. The action itself was far worse than the decision to do it had been. The result more painful yet.  
  
Brennan was dead.  
  
Adam slowly pulled the sheet up to completely cover the body, then his fingers automatically unclenched the white material. He didn't allow himself to dwell on the thought that he'd just draped the cloth over a member of his family. Brennan Mulwray was nothing more than a casualty of war.  
  
Adam would grieve his loss certainly, but he wouldn't allow himself to weep because of this. He forced himself not to cry for the life he'd taken.  
  
-----  
  
"Jesse, wake up," the voice repeated insistently. "Jesse."  
  
"I'm up, I'm up," he mumbled groggily in reply, if for no other reason that to get Shalimar to stop shaking his shoulder. He squinted up at her, and it took a second for his eyes to adjust. She looked... flustered? "What's wrong?"  
  
"It took me a full five minutes to wake you, Jess."  
  
"Really?" She still looked a bit panicked, and he pushed himself into a sitting position. "Sorry. I guess I was out like a light."  
  
After giving himself a moment to fully wake, he glanced at Shalimar once more, wondering why she was in his room in the first place. Then he heard it. "Emma's crying," he realized.  
  
"So you hear it too?" Shalimar asked nervously.  
  
"Yeah, of course I..." Jesse trailed off mid sentence. The sobs weren't coming from Emma's room. It was the air and the walls around him that were wailing, and they were crying without voice. It merely *felt* like Sanctuary itself was weeping. He grabbed Shalimar's hand. "Come on."  
  
They sprinted together down the hall and stopped in front of Emma's bedroom door. Jesse hesitantly slipped it open, and the moment he did so, everything stopped. The atmosphere felt normal again and not... sentient.  
  
Emma was sitting in the middle of her bed, clutching her pillow to her chest. She looked like a lost little girl. "There's you two and there's me and there's Adam, and there's nothing else," she said without glancing up.  
  
Jesse swallowed several times to clear his throat but found no words. Shalimar walked past him into the room and climbed onto the bed beside Emma without saying anything. After a second, Jesse decided he didn't care if it was improper and did the same.  
  
Shalimar pulled Emma close and slowly rocked them back and forth while Jesse rubbed Emma's back. Then they all waited for something, like small children huddled together to wait out a passing storm.  
  
Emma finally lifted her head and wiped her eyes. "Adam's ready to tell us now."  
  
-----  
  
When he'd gathered his thoughts and regained his composure, Adam decided it was time to deliver the news to his team. He was surprised to find them all waiting for him outside the lab.  
  
He carefully took in their scared and confused faces. He set his own expression to be solemn.  
  
Shalimar's hand flew up to cover her mouth as she translated his body language. "Oh no..."  
  
After that, a shake of his head was all Adam needed to convey what had happened. Jesse suddenly looked stricken, disbelieving that Adam could have failed. Emma's face was blank.  
  
Adam quickly found himself staring at the wall behind them, not capable of meeting their distraught gazes and Emma's haunting eyes. "I'm sorry."  
  
That was all that needed to be said, and it was difficult for Adam to find his voice for even that. The details were unimportant. In the end, Brennan was dead. That was all his team needed to know. How he died would never be spoken of.  
  
Emma slowly stepped forward and Adam blocked her path. "I need to see him," she said shakily.  
  
He looked back at the lab where Brennan's body remained, draped with the stark white sheet. "I think it's for the best that you not do that right now, Emma," Adam replied. But he stood aside and let her pass, then wondered whether or not she'd just manipulated him.  
  
He still had to perform the autopsy, look up if Brennan had any next of kin who would need to be notified, and make arrangements for what was to be done with the body. Yet he supposed all that could wait a few hours. The most important thing was for him to get some sleep and something to eat. Then he might stand a chance at regaining the focus he needed to guard his thoughts from Emma.  
  
The young Psionic could never learn the truth. He quickly shifted that thought away. He must not dwell on the necessity of sheltering his mind either, for that intention could also be picked up.  
  
"I'm sorry," he said again to Shalimar and Jesse, dismissing himself and heading promptly to his room, leaving the two devastated original members of Mutant X in his wake.  
  
-----  
  
Emma stared at the sheet for a long while, then she looked over her shoulder at Shalimar and Jesse who'd entered the lab behind her.  
  
"Both of you, please, get out," she softly requested. "I only want my own emotions right now. This pain needs to be mine. So just... go away... please. Leave us alone."  
  
She choked on a sob. "Leave *me* alone."  
  
They disappeared from the room, and Emma returned her attention to the sheet. Making the decision that she had to know, she pushed the material completely aside, uncovering not just his face. She needed to see his entire body... needed to know if there were any marks left from what Eckhart had done.  
  
She cried to see that his body wasn't perfect, wasn't fully healed this time. *Won't you come back to me?* she requested. But the link between her and Brennan was gone, and she received no return answer.  
  
This really was the last time. He'd never be hurt again now.  
  
She sat on the edge of the table where Brennan's body lay, then she slowly pulled her feet up also and eased herself into a resting position next to him, propped on her elbow with her face in her palm so she could still look at him.  
  
Then she sunk down onto her back, tears rolling down her temples into her hair. She felt as though she were drowning in shallow water. All she had to do was push herself up a single inch and she'd be able to breathe.  
  
She lay motionless.  
  
It suddenly seemed as though there was nothing good left in the world. There was only darkness, and evil, and sin. Eckhart had murdered Brennan, done terrible things, and for what? For science? Where was the humanity in that?  
  
Eckhart was a monster. And yet he considered mutants to be freaks. What right did he have?  
  
Life itself was corrupt and selfish, driven by personal gain. Emma no longer wanted to be in this world. She had no reason to be. Other than a need for revenge, her existence seemed empty now. And the feeling of loss swept all other thoughts away.  
  
Her future was supposed be with Brennan. That was the life she wanted. It was all she wanted. There was nothing else.  
  
She gently reached over and caressed Brennan's cheek, shifting onto her side once more, and she noticed his skin was already almost cool to her touch. She leaned over him, studying his features, memorizing him. One of her own tears fell on his face, and she carefully brushed it away. Her heart was breaking.  
  
She would never understand this... why fate had allowed it to happen. If there was a bigger picture, she couldn't see it. Brennan's death was meaningless.  
  
Perhaps they really were the freaks. For the first time in her life, she truly cursed what she was. Destiny didn't play these cruel games with normal people.  
  
Emma softly pressed her lips to Brennan's in a brief kiss, their first true kiss, tinged by the salt of her tears and the faint trace of his blood. She leaned her face against his, wanting to make some playful comment about how she was on top yet again. Then he'd laugh and they would smile at the joke. He needed only to wake.  
  
More of her tears rolled from her cheeks to his, and she longed to feel his breath on her skin. Part of her wanted to remain lying down beside his body forever and die with him. Nobody had ever seen her like he had - seen into her and loved her unconditionally. And nobody ever would again. In her entire life, she'd never felt so alone.  
  
Pressing herself closer beside him, she curled into the lingering warmth, needing for there to be heat beneath his skin. But there was no heartbeat, and soon he'd be cold. She clenched her fist in the sheet, pulling it over her shoulder and then resting her arm across his chest, properly covering them both as if with a normal blanket.  
  
She would lie with him and sleep, and pray not to wake from her slumber until he did, or pray never to wake at all.  
  
"I still love you," she vowed in a whisper, not caring if it was merely a result of their accidental link or the trauma of being held captive together. It was real, and it didn't matter why. "Always, Bren." Then she silently sobbed until exhaustion clamed her.  
  
-----  
  
Shalimar leaned against the wall outside the lab. She stared through watery eyes at her home. It would be different here without Brennan.  
  
"I can't believe he's really gone," Jesse said quietly, echoing her unspoken thoughts. He couldn't understand how Adam had failed them. How the hell had they lost Brennan? "We weren't supposed to ever lose anybody, Shal. We're the good guys; we're supposed to win."  
  
She stubbornly rubbed her face, refusing to cry. "We will, Jess," she swore. "Eckhart is going pay dearly for this. I promise you that. He'll pay."  
  
She slammed her fist against the wall behind her. They'd have justice, and Mason Eckhart would pay the price for Brennan's life in blood. She'd tear apart Genomex with her bare hands if she had to.  
  
Jesse saw the rage in her eyes, and he turned away, not reassured by it. He took several steps and stood in the lab doorway where he could look in and see Emma. Her sorrow was even less comforting.  
  
None the less, Jesse watched her. He only had a partial view of her face, but she looked like a mourning angel with silver tears streaking her skin.  
  
Emma was truly beautiful when she was sad, he noted before slowly looking away and leaving her alone with the body of their friend. Jesse never wanted to see her cry ever again.  
  
~~~~~~~  
  
THE END  
  
~~~~~~~  
  
Special thanks (off the top of me head at four in the morning, so I'm sure I've unintentionally left somebody out) to:  
  
My beta-readers, supporters, inspiration, and friends I made along this journey - Lanfear, ElEcTrICgUrL, Ice Queen, Vixen, Cyndi, Audrey, Ace, Toni  
  
My most relentless reviewers - Bob, Alliegirl, Meg  
  
And everybody else who left me feedback - I would list you all, but I'd likely give the ff.net mods a heart attack at how much non-story space that would take up. :) But you all meant the world to me.  
  
During the course of my time in the MX fandom, I have been through two deaths (my beloved puppy who's been with me more than half my life passed away over the holidays, and she mattered as much as any person to me), and also two pregnancies (not my own, but two people very close to me). I've loved, lost, grown up, gotten my BA degree, and written the longest story to date in this fandom. This is a period in my life I will never forget. 


End file.
